Confession Time: Share Your Culinary "Sins"

[Thanks for the Crepes]

We all make mistakes in the kitchen and elsewhere in life. What defines us as persons is how we recognize, accept, learn from and pull out of said mistakes.

 

I once knew a wise old Southern gentleman, married to a boss I split ways with in 1993. He told me, "If you're not making mistakes, it just means you aren't doing anything."

 

The world is not as nice a place without him.

 

Edited to add my Bad Cook moments:

 

Worst one was when I was only seventeen so, no senility issue, at all in play. I had an adult male dog who accompanied me almost daily on horseback rides, trained to heel to the horse on the short country road stints we did to get to trails. He was thin and muscular, very fit, so I'd always drain fat from ground beef, or other meats into his kibble. One day I had a mental lapse, and instead of straining just the fat into his food, for some reason, I dumped the whole kaboodle in. I forget what I did to salvage the human dinner, maybe I had more beef? I remember the dog ate extremely well that night.

 

Other moments usually include cooking too much to my taste when I'm also cooking for others. Frequently this involves too much capsacin. You can add hot sauce after the cook, but in order to extract full flavor from crushed red pepper it must be cooked in the dish. The recent lasagna I made was universally nixed by 5 other eaters, only one of which was a kid. I adored it. 

 

I also dreadfully overspiced a spaghetti sauce when my husband had friends over as dinner guests. While husband bragged on my cooking prowess, I created a sauce that was too bold-flavored even for me. Oregano was the culprit here, and this was 38 years ago, but still etched into the memory banks. 

 

Other long ago incidents involved bleeding into the food after a knife injury. This hasn't happened in a couple decades since I switched to a filet knife for everything except breaking down watermelons and the like. I find my thin little knife a precision instrument instead of a blunt one.

 

If only we were somehow able to amass the experience, knowledge and wisdom of age in the vigor of youth, there'd be no limit to what was possible.

Edited August 10, 2015 by Thanks for the Crepes (log)

[Deryn]

Isn't 'modernist cuisine' wonderful? Nothing is ever a failure!

[Okanagancook]

BBQ'd pork ribs on a cheap and nasty BBQ in the wind.....fire got away from me.  The ribs were literally crispy bits of very, very charcoal bits which were like dust in your mouth.  As I recall we all looked at each other and said 'inedible' all at once.  Pizzas were ordered. Ha, ha

[GlorifiedRice]

http://oi62.tinypic.com/ra1e2a.jpg

 

^^^This Salmon is perfect to me. The brown part on the left was crispy and unctuous and like Thanksgving turkey skin....yum

[Tri2Cook]

I was going to ask if the sandwich of store-bought fish sticks with tartar sauce on white bread I ate earlier meant I was a bad cook. Then I realized I didn't actually cook anything... so I couldn't possibly be a bad cook because of it.

[Anna N]

I was going to ask if the sandwich of store-bought fish sticks with tartar sauce on white bread I ate earlier meant I was a bad cook. Then I realized I didn't actually cook anything... so I couldn't possibly be a bad cook because of it.

Certainly couldn't be called a bad cook. And if you enjoyed it or even if it only filled an empty hole you could hardly be considered a bad eater!

[ElainaA]

I always thought I was a good cook. One of the first times I spent a weekend with my now husband (of 35 years) I decided to impress him by baking bread for him. And he had, in his apartment, flour !

and yeast! It never occurred to me to look at expiration dates. The flour was about 5 years old (or older). The bread came out about the consistency of a block of chalk. And weighed about 10 pounds. He was very polite and even ate some. Maybe that is why I married him. I make better bread now.

I still have failures because I love trying new things. But they are usually edible. And he is still incredibly nice about it. And I still think I am a good cook.

Elaina

[FeChef]

Yesterday I boiled my steak (dry aged T bone) at 212F for 2 hours.

 

It was not bad, a little dry, but very tasty.

 

----------------------------

 

I took the steak out from the refrigerator and put it in the bag, set the SV temperature at 129F.

 

2 hours later, I smelled some wonderful aroma and went to check the SV cooker.

 

I realized that when adding hot water to the tub, I got a phone call and forgot to put the temperature sensor in the water. So the heater boiled the water because the sensor was telling the heater that the water temperature was at room temperature..

 

I was not about to throw the steak out. 

 

I guess I was a bad cook. 

 

dcarch

Sounds like a perfect excuse to use A1 steak sauce to me!

[Thanks for the Crepes]

http://oi62.tinypic.com/ra1e2a.jpg

 

^^^This Salmon is perfect to me. The brown part on the left was crispy and unctuous and like Thanksgving turkey skin....yum

Hey Glorified Rice,

 

I'm not a fan at all of poached salmon. To me it degrades an expensive and luxurious ingredient, but your image looks a little dry.

 

I still remember one Easter when we purchased some inch and a half salmon steaks from Fresh Market and cooked them on the grill. These were bone-in and skin-on, which is critical to me for a good outcome with this fish. I've tried to explain to employees of groceries where I do not buy salmon how they are ruining it by skinning and boning, but so far no success. One even futzes around with cotton string nets to hold together their wreckage of what was once a noble animal and premium protein.

 

The skin is good to me, has basting fat, crisps well, holds the juice in, and the bones exude flavor like crazy, and also help hold juices while getting your crisp on. The cooked fish comes off the bones very easily with a fork, and if you don't care for the delicious skin, that does too.

 

If you like crispy, yet succulent salmon, get a thick, natural slice perpendicular to the spine, across the body of a gutted fish, and throw it on a hot grill. This method produces the crispy, golden stuff you crave, and allows the interior to be moist, juicy and unforgettable.

[haresfur]

...

 

Worst one was when I was only seventeen so, no senility issue, at all in play. I had an adult male dog who accompanied me almost daily on horseback rides, trained to heel to the horse on the short country road stints we did to get to trails. He was thin and muscular, very fit, so I'd always drain fat from ground beef, or other meats into his kibble. One day I had a mental lapse, and instead of straining just the fat into his food, for some reason, I dumped the whole kaboodle in. I forget what I did to salvage the human dinner, maybe I had more beef? I remember the dog ate extremely well that night.

 

...

 

Kibble isn't so bad once you doctor it up a little.

[GlorifiedRice]

Hey Glorified Rice,

 

I'm not a fan at all of poached salmon. To me it degrades an expensive and luxurious ingredient, but your image looks a little dry.

 

 

It wasnt dry at all, as I baked it from rock frozen

[BeeZee]

I'm with you, because of the fattiness of salmon I like it crusty and brown. There is a restaurant we go to that I always order the salmon because they cook it on a hot flat top grill and it crusts so nicely. When DH grills boneless chicken breasts...I pick off those incinerated, jerky like pieces on the edges. Also, I always ask for the most well done bagel at the bagel shop.

[Smokeydoke]

For all my love of cooking, I don't enjoy eating as much. I subsist, daily, on a diet of string cheese, salami nuggets and McDonalds coffee (with organic half and half). I'd say I eat this 3-4 times a week.

 

Lately I've been supplementing my diet with a nightly cocktail. I gotta get my fruit in some way.

 

Sausage Egg McMuffin and a large ice coffee is called weekend brunch around the Smokey household.

Edited January 24, 2018 by Smokeydoke (log)

[kayb]

I get by a lot of evenings on cheese and fruit and maybe some salami or proscuitto or whatever I've got in the fridge. Or potato skins; I can easily make dinner off potato skins, stuffed with cheese and bacon.

 

And liquid fruit, nightly.

 

 

[GlorifiedRice]

Sometimes Ill mix almond butter with softened butter and eat it on a spoon.

 

Once, during a week of a cold, I let 2 packages of chicken breasts go bad, so I loaded them in a ziploc bag and took em to a outlying part of Valley Forge Park

walked behind some trees and dumped it, for the vultures and carrion feeders to eat. I then went to Phoenixville real quick and on the way back the cops and park rangers were there. @gfweb

 

And Ill shiv a b**** for my Jumbo Eggs

 

 

[chromedome]

10 hours ago, GlorifiedRice said:

 

I just wanna know who called it in, nobody was there when I dumped it.

If a chicken breast falls in the forest...

[kayb]

A po'd vulture or carrion eater that wanted beef instead of chicken?

[chileheadmike]

My confession? 

 

Sigh..... pizza rolls. But only rarely. 

 

How many Hail Marys.?

[scubadoo97]

To appease the sweet tooth, tahini and honey 

[JoNorvelleWalker]

15 minutes ago, scubadoo97 said:

To appease the sweet tooth, tahini and honey 

 

Isn't that called halvah?

 

[scubadoo97]

In a basic form.  Halava is flakey 

[cakewalk]

8 hours ago, scubadoo97 said:

To appease the sweet tooth, tahini and honey 

One of my favorite combinations ever. Tahini goes so well in sweet applications, with honey being one of the best. Add a little chocolate and you're over the moon.

[BeeZee]

mmm, perhaps I'll try mixing honey and tehina and drizzling over plain yogurt (garnish of toasted sliced almonds and/or cacao nibs)?

[cakewalk]

3 hours ago, BeeZee said:

mmm, perhaps I'll try mixing honey and tehina and drizzling over plain yogurt (garnish of toasted sliced almonds and/or cacao nibs)?

It probably won't drizzle, the tahini tends to thicken. Just eat with a spoon! 

[Smokeydoke]

I love Food Network chefs, I would say 60% of my cookbook collection is FN Chefs. I hate the network, it's pure retardation, but their cookbooks are great. YMMV.

 

I love Alton, Tyler Florence, and Giada. I have the entire Emeril collection and even have some Sandra Lee, for pure comedy, of course.