Fresser

"I'll have what she's having."

From the Homer Simpson Kitchens, we present deep-fried butter.

Sounds like you oughta just install a salt lick in the house. Although it's murder on the bloatated-ness, I can totally relate to the cravings for salty food, chocolate and (for me at least) red meat! ← Once again, Heather Duster comes to the rescue! Salt Lick BBQ in Texas delivers, albeit not in the vaunted Fressermobile.

Does the fact that Xanax is a palindrome make it any more appealing?

Fress in a Dress checking in... Beware mixing pain meds and alcohol--that could be a recipe for an ambulance ride.

Pastor Virgil Jones has posted a website for his community food pantry: Mother Jones Food Pantry.

Pastrummy: Smoked meat buried in a sarcophagus and enjoyed by Egyptian kings.

Oy, I'm becoming such a maven. Greater Chicago Food Depository takes prepackaged, unopened donations and distributes them to local pantries. It's sort of the wholesaler of donations. If you look in Streetwise or another local newspaper, you can find shelters or other places that probably will take cooked food. Or you could just bag and freeze the food, then take it to people selling newspapers in downtown areas. I've done this a lot and people are usually thrilled to receive some munchies.

That depends on the site where you're donating, nr706. At the Mother Jones Food Pantry (website coming!), they gladly accepted food donations from me, which they then hustled out the door the next day to hungry people waiting in line. Of course, different pantries may have different needs. at The Ark in Chicago, they can only accept kosher food, but kosher donations from individuals are always welcome.

Anyone can contribute to local food banks by visiting the Greater Chicago Food Depository.

Karma, shawarma. I don't do this in anticipation of some future good fortune--that wouldn't be moral in the Kantian sense. I just don't want to see people go hungry. What's more, it's FUN to motor up in the well-stocked Fressermobile and see peoples faces light up.

My chicken-chomping compatriot Freddie lives about a mile from the Mother Jones food pantry referenced above. He drove by their site at 120th and Halsted this morning and saw people lined up DOWN THE BLOCK waiting for food. Beat the holiday rush, people--feed your neighbors now.

No reason to wait until the holidays, Judy. I say just invade your local grocer, fill up a cart with stapes such as oatmeal, grits, soup, canned corn and whatnot and drive the cornucopia to a food pantry. You'd be amazed at the amount of food that five $10-donations will buy.

Check this out: http://www.myfoxchicago.com/myfox/pages/Ne...TY&pageId=3.1.1 The sanctuary is at 120th and Halsted in Chicago's Pullman neighborhood. Their cupboards were literally empty and many people in the neighborhood were going hungry. So I just drove down there today in the Fressermobile and brought oatmeal, soup, spaghetti, tomato sauce, chicken, bananas and fresh watermelon. They took some nice mugshots of me that I'll forward later. Anyone who would like to contribute can reach Pastor Virgil Jones at the sanctuary. His phone number is 708-672-8080.

In case you've been missing your Recommended Daily Allowance of turkey sandwich, The Onion has the answer.