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Fresser

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Everything posted by Fresser

  1. Saturday is Shopping Day in the Fresser household, so Mama Fresser and I were schlepping down the grocery aisles when a new display caught Mama Fresser's eye: a Krispy Kreme donut display. Now we're not big sweet-eaters, but Mum couldn't resist plucking a small package of bite-sized donuts to nosh on later. When that moment arrived, Mama announced, "I want a Krispy donut!" "Mama, it's not a Krispy donut--it's a Krispy Kreme donut!" "That doesn't make any sense," Mama Fresser replied. "How could Kreme be crispy? A Krispy donut sounds better." Such inscrutable logic is the hallmark of any argument with Mama Fresser. I've heard other creative mispronunciations of company names as well. One girlfriend's father used to call a popular coffee-and-pastry shop Dunkie Donuts. There are bound to be others out there...
  2. "I'll have what she's having."
  3. From the Homer Simpson Kitchens, we present deep-fried butter.
  4. Fresser

    Chicago steakhouses

    Several have mentioned Gibsons in the Good grub in Chicawgo topic as serving one of Chicago's finest steaks. Any other nominees? I ate at Gibsons with friends and found the food unremarkable considering what we paid for it. They serve a bone-in ribeye (my favorite cut), but the wet-aged steak lacked the musky, pungent flavor that I've found in other ribeyes. Honestly, it was pretty bland. Also, my steak was cooked closer to medium-well than medium; a lady at an adjacent table who ordered her steak medium-rare also was served a medium-well steak. True, she could have sent it back, but... Frankly, I find Gibsons to be a "beautiful people" hangout, given its proximity to the Rush Street area. What others do fellow carnivores enjoy? Gene & Georgetti has an atmosphere evocative of Peter Lugers, and there are some good smaller steakhouses.
  5. Sounds like you oughta just install a salt lick in the house. Although it's murder on the bloatated-ness, I can totally relate to the cravings for salty food, chocolate and (for me at least) red meat! ← Once again, Heather Duster comes to the rescue! Salt Lick BBQ in Texas delivers, albeit not in the vaunted Fressermobile.
  6. Does the fact that Xanax is a palindrome make it any more appealing?
  7. Fress in a Dress checking in... Beware mixing pain meds and alcohol--that could be a recipe for an ambulance ride.
  8. Pastor Virgil Jones has posted a website for his community food pantry: Mother Jones Food Pantry.
  9. Check this out: http://www.myfoxchicago.com/myfox/pages/Ne...TY&pageId=3.1.1 The sanctuary is at 120th and Halsted in Chicago's Pullman neighborhood. Their cupboards were literally empty and many people in the neighborhood were going hungry. So I just drove down there today in the Fressermobile and brought oatmeal, soup, spaghetti, tomato sauce, chicken, bananas and fresh watermelon. They took some nice mugshots of me that I'll forward later. Anyone who would like to contribute can reach Pastor Virgil Jones at the sanctuary. His phone number is 708-672-8080.
  10. Pastrummy: Smoked meat buried in a sarcophagus and enjoyed by Egyptian kings.
  11. Oy, I'm becoming such a maven. Greater Chicago Food Depository takes prepackaged, unopened donations and distributes them to local pantries. It's sort of the wholesaler of donations. If you look in Streetwise or another local newspaper, you can find shelters or other places that probably will take cooked food. Or you could just bag and freeze the food, then take it to people selling newspapers in downtown areas. I've done this a lot and people are usually thrilled to receive some munchies.
  12. That depends on the site where you're donating, nr706. At the Mother Jones Food Pantry (website coming!), they gladly accepted food donations from me, which they then hustled out the door the next day to hungry people waiting in line. Of course, different pantries may have different needs. at The Ark in Chicago, they can only accept kosher food, but kosher donations from individuals are always welcome.
  13. Anyone can contribute to local food banks by visiting the Greater Chicago Food Depository.
  14. Karma, shawarma. I don't do this in anticipation of some future good fortune--that wouldn't be moral in the Kantian sense. I just don't want to see people go hungry. What's more, it's FUN to motor up in the well-stocked Fressermobile and see peoples faces light up.
  15. My chicken-chomping compatriot Freddie lives about a mile from the Mother Jones food pantry referenced above. He drove by their site at 120th and Halsted this morning and saw people lined up DOWN THE BLOCK waiting for food. Beat the holiday rush, people--feed your neighbors now.
  16. No reason to wait until the holidays, Judy. I say just invade your local grocer, fill up a cart with stapes such as oatmeal, grits, soup, canned corn and whatnot and drive the cornucopia to a food pantry. You'd be amazed at the amount of food that five $10-donations will buy.
  17. Fresser

    How to make a sandwich

    Our Diet Coke had not chilled yet, so Mama Fresser ambled to the fridge for some ice cubes. To her dismay she found an EMPTY ice cube tray. "Fresser!" Mama squealed as she poked me in the tummy. "Did you forget the recipe again?" "Sorry, Mama. I was watching 'Iron Chef.' " "Turn that off and open up one of your Martha Stewart cookbooks. That chick makes EVERYTHING from scratch!" Given that the Fresser household is the epicenter for Borscht Belt humor, it's only natural that we joke about ice cube recipes. So when I looked at my jar of Miracle Whip and saw a recipe for "The Classic Turkey Sandwich," I thought it was a joke too. It wasn't. It read thusly: Prep time: 5 minutes Ingredients: 2 slices of whole-grain bread 1 tablespoon Miracle Whip leaf lettuce two tomato slices five pieces of thinly sliced turkey Preparation: Spread the Miracle Whip on one slice of bread. Place the lettuce and tomato on the bread and top with the turkey. Cover with the remaining slice of bread. Makes 1 serving. Frankly, this turkey tutorial raises more questions than it answers. On which bread slice should I spread the Miracle Whip? Assuming the two slices are not perfectly equal, this choice affects both the sandwich's taste and texture. What if I'm using the end piece? And once I've selected the slice, which side gets the Whip? The top or the bottom? Or maybe the slice that will end up face down on my carpet? As if Miracle Whipping weren't enough pressure, now I need a mise en place for the lettuce and tomatoes. Garde manger!! And I'm suspicious about that serving size. This recipe obviously would not accommodate the soup-and-half-sandwich crowd. Perhaps some information was missing. Aauugh! I can't handle the pressure! No more Miracle Whip jar recipes for me. I'll just watch Rachel Ray instead. I hear she has a great ice cube recipe...
  18. Fresser

    How to make a sandwich

    In case you've been missing your Recommended Daily Allowance of turkey sandwich, The Onion has the answer.
  19. Fresser

    Yat's Cajun Creole

    A new Cajun joint just sprouted up in my quasi-industrial work neighborhood. Interestingly, they don't have a printed menu: owner Nate says, "If we run out of a dish mid-day, we just switch the menu to a new item." I found the pozole stew to be a smokey treat; has anyone else tried the place? They're on the web at Yat's Cajun Creole.
  20. Tour de France cyclists consume about 8,000 calories a day, but then they're thin as stick-figures. They have much less upper-body mass than Olympic eye-candy like Phelps--something that the women here seem to have noticed. Lance Armstrong himself was a triathlete in his pre-Tour de France days. How many calories per day do triathletes like perennial Ironman-winner Dave Scott ingest?
  21. At the behest of Fat Guy, I've compiled brief write-ups of the places we invaded on our Niles Ethnic Food Tour. Pictures should be posted sometime tomorrow. First stop was New York Bagels & Bialys, our initial gathering point. Driving up in the Fressermobile, I spied Fat Guy in himself, wielding a bagel no less. "Very authentic," Steve proclaimed after sampling our fine Midwestern wares. Naturally, I had to share his praise with the counter crew--"See that big nosher over there? He's a NYC food critic and he likes your bagels!" This place also has a 24-hour store in Lincolnwood, just off the I-94 and Touhy Avenue exit. Remember it the next time you get the 2 A.M. munchies. Next stop for the caravan was Uni-Mart One Stop, a large Filipino grocery and bakery. Fish-lovers will be in heaven here, as a large freezer case of fresh catches sits in the front of the store. They also bake lots of sweets on the premises. Most interesting was Uni-Mart's "Nurse's Station," kind of a break room for all the Filipino nurses who work at nearby hospitals. Meat-lovers should converge on Schmeisser's Meat and Sausage, an old-school wurstmacher. They were kind enough to bring us into the kitchen where they hand-cut their meats and grind them fresh daily to make any one of a dozen different sausage recipes. "We can make custom sausages for any recipe," said the amiable chap who showed us around. "Big grocers like Costo can't do that--they're factories. We're a butcher shop," he emphasized. Schmeisser's seemed like the kind of place where employees stay for a long time, so I asked our host how long he had worked there. "Since age seven," he said and grinned. Whole Lotta Seoul You'll forgive the pun--our next destination was less a grocery store than an entire ethnic mall. H Mart was a cornucopia of all things Korean: kind of a Koreacopia. A full-fledged Korean grocery sits surrounded by dozens of Korean merchants featuring everything from bookstores, beauty shops, banks and wire transfer services to shoemakers and massage therapists. Our gracious host Jin Oh and her associates showed our group to a private reception room where they screen subtitled Korean videos that explain their culinary traditions and cultures. Being somewhat prepared for the event, I greeted our hosts by saying Ahn Yong HaSeo, which is Korean for "Hello" and the extent of my Korean vocabulary. They're eyes LIT up and they greeted me in Korean as well--Koreans just love it when an American can speak even a bit of the mother tongue. As we left, Jin gave each member of our group a goodie-bag with Korean teas and a luxurious bath-towel. If you're ever in their neighborhood, definitely call ahead and ask if they might be offering a tour. Here's a list of their stores nationwide: http://www.hmart.com/ourstore/ourstore_main.asp. Our last stop before schepping to the communal kitchen was Himalayan Restaurant, an Indian and Nepali restaurant that serves a scrumptious lunch buffet. Though I'm not an expert on Indian food, I just loved the Mutter Paneer and fresh vegetable selection with coriander-based sauces. For only $8.95 per person, you enjoy fresh Indian buffet, naan bread and a comfortable atmosphere. That's a LOT for your money. Thanks to everyone for such a wonderful, memorable time.
  22. Village Creamery is at 8000 West Oakton (intersection of Oakton & Waukegan). Here's a review: http://www.pioneerlocal.com/oakton/1098505...1408-s1.article.
  23. Fresser, wasn't there also a Middle-Eastern market and a Polish deli? We also had, I believe some Asian-inflected ice creams from the Village Creamery. Looking forward to photos. ← Steve, I'll post some promo pictures from Pita Inn a wee bit later in the day. We made an impromptu stop there on the way to the Evanston kitchen. I've eaten at Pita Inn since 1989 and the place has sprouted from one hole-in-the wall store to a group of three restaurants, bakery, grocery and furniture gallery. Many guys have worked at the restaurant for over 20 years--that's a tenure nearly unheard of in the restaurant business.
  24. Hwa's eGullet name is "einberliner." But I'm not sure why, as she resembles neither President Kennedy nor a jelly doughnut.
  25. Are you a Maroon, Hungry C? Let's hear the Scholarly Yell!!!
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