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Food Funnies

Keith_W

By Keith_W
in Food Media & Arts

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Anna N

Anna N

Posted
Posted

 The husband-proof grocery list 

 

Here.

 

 It's not just husbands who need a grocery list such as this. I speak from experience. 

 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2

Anna Nielsen aka "Anna N"

...I just let people know about something I made for supper that they might enjoy, too. That's all it is. (Nigel Slater)

"Cooking is about doing the best with what you have . . . and succeeding." John Thorne

Our 2012 (Kerry Beal and me) Blog

My 2004 eG Blog

lindag

lindag

Posted
Posted (edited)

I always made lists but then I'd get a call from The Mister who said he couldn't read my (printed) handwriting.

Edited by lindag (log)
ElsieD

ElsieD

Posted
Posted
19 minutes ago, Anna N said:

 The husband-proof grocery list 

 

Here.

 

 It's not just husbands who need a grocery list such as this. I speak from experience. 

 

 

That's a hoot.  I would add one thing.  I would includes a drawing of what two looks like II and what 4 looks like IIII so that when I ask for 2 smoked picnic shoulder as I did last week, he doesn't come home with four.

chromedome

chromedome

Posted
Posted

That still wouldn't work with my son-in-law. His M.O. is to just shrug and fill the cart with stuff he likes (and they can't afford) and then say "I couldn't find the things that were on the list."

  • Like 1
  • Sad 1

“Who loves a garden, loves a greenhouse too.” - William Cowper, The Task, Book Three

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

liuzhou

liuzhou

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Anna N said:

 

 The husband-proof grocery list 

 

Here.

 

 It's not just husbands who need a grocery list such as this. I speak from experience.

 

 

Amusing, but certainly not new. Here is one by the artist Michelangelo (1475-1564) for his semi-literate servant.


Picture1.thumb.jpg.fccc52b0fe19bb7d3fbee4ab6c2451a0.jpg

  • Like 10

...your dancing child with his Chinese suit.

 

"No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot"
Mark Twain
 

The Kitchen Scale Manifesto

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted

You're On Fire -- They Might Be Giants' more-than-worthy successor to Peter Gabriel's classic dancing chickens.

 

(Anyone else here a TMBG fan?)

  • Like 3

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

chromedome

chromedome

Posted
Posted

How to resist a band that writes lines like "say I'm the only bee in your bonnet"?

“Who loves a garden, loves a greenhouse too.” - William Cowper, The Task, Book Three

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, chromedome said:

How to resist a band that writes lines like "say I'm the only bee in your bonnet"?

 

Or "Triangle man, Triangle man/Triangle man hates particle man/They have a fight, Triangle wins/Triangle man"

 

Or "Can't shake the devil's hand and say you're only kidding"

 

Here's what they look (and sound) like: NPR Tiny Desk Concert   At the Kennedy Center 

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

Smithy

Smithy

Posted
Posted

Today's Foxtrot: PIZZA as an acronym

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2

Nancy Smith, aka "Smithy"
Host, eG Forums - nsmith@egstaff.org

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"Every day should be filled with something delicious, because life is too short not to spoil yourself. " -- Ling (with permission)
"There comes a time in every project when you have to shoot the engineer and start production." -- author unknown

JohnT

JohnT

Posted
Posted
7 minutes ago, Smithy said:

Today's Foxtrot: PIZZA as an acronym

So, I wonder what S.T.E.A.K and L.O.B.S.T.E.R stands for!

  • Like 1

Cape Town - At the foot of a flat topped mountain with a tablecloth covering it.

Some time ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die.

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, JohnT said:

So, I wonder what S.T.E.A.K and L.O.B.S.T.E.R stands for!

 

Steamed Tofu, Eggplant, And Kale

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted

Side salad

 

 

  • Like 1

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

chromedome

chromedome

Posted
Posted

I think this is legitimate for our thread, since it addresses at least the "drink" side of food and drink...

 

http://www.ctvnews.ca/world/drunk-man-arrested-claims-he-time-travelled-to-warn-of-aliens-1.3619979

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1

“Who loves a garden, loves a greenhouse too.” - William Cowper, The Task, Book Three

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

chromedome

chromedome

Posted
Posted

One more for everyone's delectation: 

Authentic Chicken Parmigiana

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1

“Who loves a garden, loves a greenhouse too.” - William Cowper, The Task, Book Three

 

"Not knowing the scope of your own ignorance is part of the human condition...The first rule of the Dunning-Kruger club is you don’t know you’re a member of the Dunning-Kruger club.” - psychologist David Dunning

 

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, chromedome said:

One more for everyone's delectation: 

Authentic Chicken Parmigiana

 

Cute. I liked the "Alternate Ending."

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, chromedome said:

I think this is legitimate for our thread, since it addresses at least the "drink" side of food and drink...

 

http://www.ctvnews.ca/world/drunk-man-arrested-claims-he-time-travelled-to-warn-of-aliens-1.3619979

 

I'll see your aliens and raise you one wombat.

 

Quote

Mr Stringer said alcohol had played a big part in Cradock's life. However, defence lawyer Michael Vesty said alcohol was not a problem that day.

 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

Thanks for the Crepes

Thanks for the Crepes

Posted
Posted
On 10/5/2017 at 2:30 PM, Alex said:

Side salad

 

 

 

Complete with terrible looking slices of styromate and brown lettuce. I guess it's funny in a way, but not if you're the paying customer who receives this pathetic excuse for a salad. Wish they had said where it was from so people would know to eat somewhere else. :) Or maybe they just concocted it for amusement?

> ^ . . ^ <

 

 

liuzhou

liuzhou

Posted
Posted
43 minutes ago, Thanks for the Crepes said:

 

Complete with terrible looking slices of styromate and brown lettuce. I guess it's funny in a way, but not if you're the paying customer who receives this pathetic excuse for a salad. Wish they had said where it was from so people would know to eat somewhere else. :) Or maybe they just concocted it for amusement?

 

 

You do realise that The Onion is a satire site?

  • Like 3

...your dancing child with his Chinese suit.

 

"No amount of evidence will ever persuade an idiot"
Mark Twain
 

The Kitchen Scale Manifesto

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, liuzhou said:

 

 

You do realise that The Onion is a satire site?

 

TftC is in good company.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

  • 2 weeks later...
suzilightning

suzilightning

Posted
Posted

I love me a good library joke.....

  • Like 9
  • Haha 3

Nothing is better than frying in lard.

Nothing.  Do not quote me on this.

 

Linda Ellerbee

Take Big Bites

Alex

Alex

Posted
Posted

Zucchini: Is there anything it can't do?

 

Quote

A German man feared a monster courgette he found in his garden was an unexploded World War Two bomb and called the police.

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 4

"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."  -George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman, Act 1

 

"Imagine all the food you have eaten in your life and consider that you are simply some of that food, rearranged."  -Max Tegmark, physicist

 

Gene Weingarten, writing in the Washington Post about online news stories and the accompanying readers' comments: "I basically like 'comments,' though they can seem a little jarring: spit-flecked rants that are appended to a product that at least tries for a measure of objectivity and dignity. It's as though when you order a sirloin steak, it comes with a side of maggots."

 

A king can stand people's fighting, but he can't last long if people start thinking. -Will Rogers, humorist

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