Food Funnies

[chromedome]

Look away, Liuzhou...

 

[liuzhou]

[Shelby]

9 hours ago, liuzhou said:

This is me every time I go to the store and need something from the top shelf.

[liuzhou]

[liuzhou]

[liuzhou]

[pastameshugana]

[liuzhou]

[liuzhou]

[liuzhou]

 

[chromedome]

[liuzhou]

 

Happy Thanksgiving, American Friends!

 

[liuzhou]

 

“Thanksgiving” is an American festival in which various observances, accessories and fripperies are used to disguise the fact that the center of attention is, in fact, just a big, tasteless white bird.

 

[heidih]

Oh! Not!  Blasphemy.

[Alex]

Mr Natural!

[chromedome]

[liuzhou]

via Twitter

 

"According to this advent calendar I'm eating, Christmas was 5 minutes ago."

[heidih]

20 hours ago, liuzhou said:

via Twitter

 

"According to this advent calendar I'm eating, Christmas was 5 minutes ago."

In my obsessive Advent calendar life they usually only go to the 24th!  Oddly I have rarely if never seen even small children "cheat" and pre-eat though they may sneak a peek at next day's offering.

[liuzhou]

 

[JoNorvelleWalker]

Yesterday I read of a baby girl who had been frozen 27 years.  My first thought was can she legally drink?

 

[Katie Meadow]

2 hours ago, JoNorvelleWalker said:

Yesterday I read of a baby girl who had been frozen 27 years.  My first thought was can she legally drink?

 

Applesauce, puree sweet potatoes and bourbon back.

[Margaret Pilgrim]

One evening, four brothers chatted together after dinner. They discussed the 95th birthday gifts they were able to give their elderly mother.
 

The first said, "You know I had a big house built for Mama."
The second said, "And I had a large theater built in the house."
The third said, "And I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her."
The fourth said, "You know how Mama loved reading the Bible and you know she can't read anymore because she can't see very well I bought her a parrot who could recite the entire Bible. It took ten preachers over 8 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $50,000 a year for five years to the church, but it was worth it. Mama only has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it."

The other brothers were impressed.

 

After the birthday celebration Mama sent out her "Thank You" notes.
She wrote:
"Milton, the house you built is so huge that I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway.”
"Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home. I have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks anyway.”
"Michael, you gave me an expensive theater that can hold 50 people, but all of my friends are dead, I've lost my hearing, and I'm nearly blind. I'll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same."
"Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give a little thought to your gift.
The chicken was delicious. Thank you so much."
 Love, Mama

[JoNorvelleWalker]

Punctuation counts.  I was just viewing a product from Whole Foods:  soap scented oatmeal.

 

[Smithy]

The place is gone now, but there used to be an old service station in Van Horn, Texas that prominently advertised

DIESEL FRIED CHICKEN

[heidih]

1 hour ago, Smithy said:

The place is gone now, but there used to be an old service station in Van Horn, Texas that prominently advertised

DIESEL FRIED CHICKEN

Explanation needed as I work up questions for a webinar on Reimagining the California Gas Station https://calendar.usc.edu/event/3rd_la_pump_to_plug_symposium#.X8wvqWVKj-c