Dinner II: The Gallery of Regrettable Foods (Part 1)

[sazji]

I posted this picture earlier on the "What did you have for dessert" thread, but realized in retrospect that this was the place it truly belonged! It was a chocolate pudding cake, which actually tasted quite good. But the light was weird, and the brown dish probably didn't help at all. My first reaction to it was, "Oh, Tar Baby spit up on a brownie."

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[torakris]

I really love this thread!

two recent fish dinners

[purplewiz]

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Assuming the white bits are the fish, what are the longish, greyish striped bits?

Marcia.

[torakris]

Assuming the white bits are the fish, what are the longish, greyish striped bits?

Marcia.

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gobo (burdock root), it is really hard to make that look pretty...

[purplewiz]

gobo (burdock root), it is really hard to make that look pretty...

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Thanks - I'm not sure I've ever seen that before. Definitely interesting looking!

Marcia.

[rooftop1000]

Assuming the white bits are the fish, what are the longish, greyish striped bits?

Marcia.

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gobo (burdock root), it is really hard to make that look pretty...

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Someone around here told me it tastes like dirt

tracey

[Shalmanese]

but in a good way!

[Grub]

Ever since I read Anthony Bourdain's "Kitchen Confidential" and saw how they were willing to put up with just about anything from a good baker (and, of course, the psycho baker in the aborted sitcom by the same name, where the poor pastry chef had to go down into the baker's dungeon, a'la Silence of the Lambs) -- well, ever since then, I've wanted to learn how to make some good bread.

Here's my latest attempt:

As you can see, it did get eaten (I sliced it really, really thin -- and since the soup that it went with was supposed to be accompanied by "croutons" I could kinda promote it with that angle and get away with it, sort of). But that was NOT what I was expecting.

The best way for me to obtain some good bread would be to bake one of these things, and then lay in wait outside a bakery, and assault someone leaving it, beating them senseless with my "bread" and stealing whatever they purchased.

[lesfen]

I really love this thread!

two recent fish dinners

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You should put a warning on that picture! Do not look at this is you have a weak stomach... or if you are hung over.

[sparrowgrass]

I have been a lurker, but just today got my posting abilities and well lets just say first post and it needed to be in this thread LOL... this was lunch today... tasted fantastic.. looked like cat barf on toast *sigh* 

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"Cat Barf" is what my children call scrambled eggs with cheese and ham. ("Called", I guess I should say--they are 22 and 26 now.)

[Carrot Top]

The best way for me to obtain some good bread would be to bake one of these things, and then lay in wait outside a bakery, and assault someone leaving it, beating them senseless with my "bread" and stealing whatever they purchased. 

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I hate to say it, Grub - but the bread does not look bad enough for this thread.

However, I LOVE your idea above. Please document it with photographs so that all bakers of hard loaves everywhere will be able to do the same. . .(P.S. Bad bagels might be particularly good for knocking someone out with. . .)

[handmc]

I posted this picture earlier on the "What did you have for dessert" thread, but realized in retrospect that this was the place it truly belonged! It was a chocolate pudding cake, which actually tasted quite good. But the light was weird, and the brown dish probably didn't help at all.  My first reaction to it was, "Oh, Tar Baby spit up on a brownie." 

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Sorry, I thought the picture would be displayed

Aye its the chocolate thunder from down under!

That's what it looks like mate!

Edited February 14, 2006 by handmc (log)

[Sugarella]

^^^ No offence Sadji, but to me that chocolate pudding cake looked like a heart with intestines wrapped around it. Ugh!

Edited February 15, 2006 by Sugarella (log)

[tejon]

^^^  No offence Sadji, but to me that chocolate pudding cake looked like a heart with intestines wrapped around it.  Ugh! 

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That's exactly what I thought when I saw it - intestines!

[I_call_the_duck]

I have been a lurker, but just today got my posting abilities and well lets just say first post and it needed to be in this thread LOL... this was lunch today... tasted fantastic.. looked like cat barf on toast *sigh* 

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Looks a lot like the chicken shepherd's pie I made this weekend. Not pretty by any means, but tasted fine.

And I agree with Carrot Top. Grub, that bread doesn't look that bad.

[Megan Blocker]

Sazji, oh my god.  that is hideous.  what IS that?  cow's nose?

edited because photo didn't copy

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It is an entire sheep's head, surrounded by the feet. The white piece sticking out is the nose cartilage, which I ate. It tasted like very crunchy lamb. Perhaps you'd like to see the first course:

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That looks like what came out of that guy's stomach in Alien.

[Chufi]

This may not look too bad, but it tasted awful. Pasta with roasted beets, gorgonzola, aragula and pinenuts. All good stuff right? So why did it taste so bad that I could not even finish my plate, and I had a sandwich with the leftover gorgonzola instead?

I blame the beets.. I roasted them in foil in the oven like I always do, but when they were done, they looked all wrinkled and dry. When I peeled and cut them they hardly stained my hands, like there was no juice left in them.. Maybe they were simply too old.. you know how beets have that erathy, sweet taste.. these just tasted of soil.. Soil pasta

anyway.. bleh. Don't want to eat beets for a little while...

Edited March 15, 2006 by Chufi (log)

[sazji]

^^^  No offence Sadji, but to me that chocolate pudding cake looked like a heart with intestines wrapped around it.  Ugh! 

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Offense? Are you kidding? I posted it here because it was offensive, I thought that was the point! If you had said "Oh, that actually looks really scrummy," then I would have been offended!

[Grub]

Some really nice (ie., very nasty ) entries here!

I really do try very hard to make every single one of my dishes look good enough to post in the proper Dinner thread -- and I rarely succeeed, but just "Ah what the hell" and post it anyhow hehe. It's been a little while since things really went haywire now, but it did tonight.

Salmon is one of my favorite dishes. I mostly do it in the oven, slightly fancy baked in puff pastry ala Coulibiac/Wellington, or in phyllo pastry, and also very simple -- broiled, just with a few toppings like salt, pepper, ginger and orange zest -- I especially love the combination of gigner and orange zest.

This time, I wanted to do a crust, and I've got this great ginger-wasabi sauce (Robert Rotschild Farm) that I really like, but can't seem to find any other use for, other than for sandwiches or as a general condiment -- but I want to cook with it. It looks like a mustard (and tends to be stocked amongst the exotic gourmet mustards) and basically tastes like a sweet mustard with a really flavorful kick to it. Also, I've got some panko breadcrumbs that I'm trying to put to good use, so I ended up with a crust of ginger-wasabi sauce, panko crumbs, soy sauce and parmigiano... In the back of my head, there's a slight thought of worry that I'm just dropping random things in, but I trot along, assuring myself that this is a wacky, edgy crazy Asian-Italian fusion thang...

So I mix it together, and the soy and ginger-wasabi sauce instantly makes the panko crumbs soggy -- but the cheese should help make it crusty, right? Nope.

The snap peas were sauteed briefly with a honey-soy sauce glaze, and were really very nice, and sort of fit into the semi-Asian theme. But the creamy mashed garlic taters with chives didn't fit in at all, of course. And those creamy ones never look as photogenic as the fluffy ones -- but they're way easier to make, and taste just as good, I think. But uh, I'm rambling. Here's the result:

This was one big salmon... So to get the fillets down to a sensible size, I had to cut them really narrow -- they barely fit onto the plate. I mean, that doesn't look good in its own right.

But the crust, oh dear... Salmon with a ginger-wasabi-dog turd-crust. Ugh.

[Radio7]

Oh man - this is my new favorite thread!

I don't know whether to laugh or toss my cookies

Bring on the creepy dishes!

[curlywurlyfi]

so my friend Em was in town with her new baby girl (five weeks old), and I decided to make her pink cupcakes to celebrate.

I have learnt several valuable lessons from this experience.

1. I need bigger cupcake tins - mine squashed the paper cases leaving holes gouged vertically in the cupcakes

2. Said gutters were perfect for the icing to drool down, even though said icing refused to cover the entire top of the cupcake

3. Nigella's vanilla cupcake recipe sucks. They came out of the oven looking fantastic, if a little pointy on top, but as they cooled they sank + developed the texture of something you would use to wipe up spills on a kitchen counter

4. Red food colouring plus white icing sugar does NOT give you baby pink - it gives you a lurid magenta, suitable for Hammer House of Horror vampire blood special effects

5. I am 36 years old and well past the age of Barbie Fun Sprinkles

The Cupcakes of Blood:

A closeup. Please note how this one looks like it's in the death grip of a miniature cerise octopus:

[Shalmanese]

I would eat that.

[Chufi]

That color is, indeed, scary.

5.  I am 36 years old and well past the age of Barbie Fun Sprinkles

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I'm pretty sure Nigella wouldn't agree with that. Not that that matters...

I went to a sushi workshop the other day. Everybody was so serious and respectful of the whole sushi ritual (you know, fanning the rice and stuff like that) that I could not help myself and made this sushi easterbunny:

It doesn't look inedible (and it was, in fact, perfectly edible), still I feel that every sushichef would cringe upon seeing it

Edited April 10, 2006 by Chufi (log)

[curlywurlyfi]

Chufi that is hysterical!

[hathor]

Chufi, just so you don't feel alone in the world of sushi-humor....check out this sushi birthday cake. I didn't make it, one of the Japanese chef that went to Ital.cook with me made it. Took him all day and we demolished it in 15 minutes! Try to see the Santa Claus birthday candle...its a very special touch!