Comforting foods, consoling foods

[tryska]

oh - as far as diet goes - definitely doritos with hot sauces, and chocolate, and starches of all kinds do it for me.

[Mabelline]

Just so we know what stage you're at gal, you gotta update us with a breakup food report...then we can prescribe the appropriate dose of totally worthless comfort calories. I tried the vodka diet (I am a Scotch drinker) and when I walked to the townhouse vending machine at 3 am to buy sunkist orange soda (Where's the GACK emoticon) I had my epiphany. That's when I shifted gears.

[sabg]

i am also a big believer in the rebound to lift the spirits..make a list of the opportunites you turned down because you were involved and start calling them...also love love love mac and cheese, or big huge bowls of thin spaghetti with lots'o butter good grated cheese and pepper..unfortunatly for me alcohol would make me weepy

[chow guy]

Good cheese on really good bread. Dulce de late ice cream. Puttensca pasta. potatoes mashed with horseradish or celery root- turnips, parsnips etc... Roast chicken with roasted vegetables. Pie. Rice pudding

Karen,

I am flabbergasted, You have mentioned manyof my must have comfort foods, when things get tough.

I buy several kinds of bread and cheeses like St Andre, Brie and Cabrales, Dulce de Leche ice cream, Pasta (Putanesca or fresh clam sauce). Roast chicken, Mashed Yukon Gold potatoes and celery root with gravy (I always have some gravy in the freezer for just such an emegency) and Cozy Shack rice pudding with a mixed berry sauce and whipped cream.

I aslo run to cheesy enchiladas with Chymayo red chile, Hot and Sour soup, Totellini en brodo and Thai style duck noodle bowl for comfort.

[cakewalk]

Sometimes the world seems to be split up into two types of people: those who can't swallow a bite when they're upset, and those who eat just about anything they see when they're upset. I am definitely a confirmed member of the latter group. In the initial stages of "upset-ness" anything is fair game, and it is usually pre-packaged, has tons of sugar and chocolate, and demands absolutely no effort on my part. As I start to regain some equilibrium, I start to cook. That's always a sign that I'm regaining control. So if you're actually thinking about cooking, well, sounds like you're doing A-OK.

[tryska]

i do have to admit, in the initial throws of agony i'm a non-eater. then that day comes when i reach for guinness stout for breakfast....

[beans]

Non-eater here too. My last breakup I sought out tons drank a lot of water and pineapple juice balanced with Citron lemon drops. The whole summer I left the corporate world behind (the same time of this crappy end to the relationship) for a pen, order pad and serving tray I survived on snagging croutons and a solo portion cup of ranch for dipping. Did I mention a fair amount of ibuprofen? I couldn't eat or be motivated to eat. Near the end of the summer, if I had time, I was scarfing down our restaurant's spinach dip with the blue corn chips.

When feeling a bit down or out of sorts I will always seek out a small chocolate indulgence. I was never one to eat a whole box of anything, so two pieces would be a treat. Elsewise I'd go back to childhood favourites -- tapioca pudding, cheeses, poppyseed danish/kuchen slices, pb&j's and, of course, croutons. My ultimate feel good comfort meal is my beloved Sailor Boy crackers with some some smoked sockeye, cream of tomato soup and some fresh salmonberries in a bowl dotted with a few wild blueberries.

Chin up Ondine. I hope you feel better.

[Ondine]

Suzilightning: Chocolate chip cookies sound good! Though I doubt Customs and Quarantine would let them through. Bastards would probably eat them. WHich is sad as I can't bake to save my life.

Mabelline: I have been indulging in fried noodles (mee goreng, chow hor fun) and weird vegetarian meat substitutes. It's been kinda like I've reasoned that my taste buds are haywire right now, I should try stuff that is totally weird.

Strangely enough, traditional starches like bread and potatoes don't seem to appeal at all. And I seem to have totally gone off sugar and chocolate. Judging from most of the previous responses this does seem rather unusual!

But I have been drinking lots of tea. So much tea, I slosh when I move. Or maybe not.

I do have plans in the works though. I have just come off a killer week of on-call overtime - the boy does have an evil sense of timing, however inadvertant - and my paycheque is burning a hole in my pocket. This weekend I have one of my rare appointments with my therapist ($250 an hour is too much for frequent visits), followed by a half-mad wardrobe shopping spree with a gay friend!

Or maybe I shouldn't let him pick out the stuff I wear to work.....

[fifi]

Listen to your gay friend. My gay friends give me the very best advice. And they are shopping companions par excellence. I hate to shop and they make me do good. Have lots of fun on that excursion.

[Pan]

$250/hour for therapy??!!

[gus_tatory]

Here's some positive vibes from a perfect stranger.

what GG Mora said.

also just make sure you eat. even if it's a Boost/Slimfast/Carnation Instant Breakfast/Smoothie, just eat something.

feel better soon,

gus

[Pickles]

There is no real comfort food for heartbreak;

Speak for yourself honey! I go for the natural comfort of milky things. Mac and cheese, mashed potatoes with lots of butter, pasta with too much butter and cheese, ice cream. It's all about breast milk. Our first comfort comes from the sweetness of it. So...we naturally return to it when upset. The best book to read regarding food, break-ups, and comfort? Heartburn.. by Norah Ephron. It kept me from suicide! And the movie ain't bad, either...but read the book first.

[reverendtmac]

The last time I broke up with a girl that was worth feeling crappy over, I lived on Marly Reds and Talisker for about a day and a half, took a couple days off of work and hit range balls until my hands bled. Mindless physical activity combined with the two things she wasn't crazy about me having = some sense of equalibrium...and this solution beat the crap out of what I would do when I was younger.

After the (epic) hangover, I still wasn't hungry...so I forced myself to have eggs and toast, eggs and toast, eggs and toast. Powerbars when I was on the course; habit's a good thing when you're feeling like this. Oh, and Campbells Bean w/ Bacon soup (thank God I'm not the only one!)

Either way: don't let the world grind you down, eat something, and feel better.

[Mabelline]

SO is also a bean with bacon devotee, and we keep a stock of it for when he's feeling puny, or chilled after hours of water,smoke, and below zero.

[Lady T]

I'm one of those people who needs to spend up to three or four days staring into space and being grim and inconsolable -- followed by up to a couple of weeks of ferocious, every-minute-accounted-for activity. Stage I generally begins with an horrific solitary wine binge, and is afterward marked by comfort food alone at home (pasta with sauteed greens, wild-mushroom risotto, quesadillas and the like); Stage II usually is accompanied by major restaurant activity with friends.

Then I start thinking about how nice it would be to make that risotto for two...

Hope you get back to that stage soon, Ondine!

Edited February 24, 2004 by Lady T (log)

[alacarte]

This weekend I have one of my rare appointments with my therapist ($250 an hour is too much for frequent visits), followed by a half-mad wardrobe shopping spree with a gay friend!

Sounds like a combination of Woody Allen and Sex & The City.

My cure for the blues is to order a take-away meal from the most expensive restaurant that will deliver to my door -- INCLUDING DESSERT -- mix a batch of margaritas and wallow at home in solitude, with a stack of mystery novels. And I'm defiant if I get chocolate on the pages of the books.

Always makes things brighter the next day.

Hope your skies clear up soon, Ondine.

[purplewiz]

Breaking up just sucks. After I broke up with my ex, I lived on Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup and small salads. Campbell's is the soup that my mother used to feed us when we were sick as kids; it still maintains an air of comfort.

Echoing a theme in this thread, I also ate a lot of eggs and noodles. Eggs and noodles is just what it sounds like: cooked, drained noodles (elbows or flat wides preferred), thrown in a pot with some butter. When the butter is melted and the noodles are warm, pour a couple of beaten eggs over it all, stir a couple of times, put a lid on the pot, and let it sit off heat until the eggs are cooked. Salt, pepper, eat. More comfort food from when I was a child.

My best friend helped me through it by feeding me lots of "finger food". There's something elemental about eating with your hands, and it's a very comforting feeling.

Ok, I was also very grateful that Ben and Jerry's came in the convenient 1 pint single serving size.

Fortunately, that was all a long time ago.

Marcia.

[s'kat]

Ondine, I really feel for you!

I go through a series of stages after bad break-ups... a good week or two of not eating, sobbing uncontrollably, and being a huge PITA to be around for more than a few minutes.

Then, I rediscover the joys of wine, cheese, and crackers, and spend many hours over all of these reading through Exorcising Your Ex, still prone though to having intermittent bouts of uncontrollable sobbing.

Then comes the need for exercise, which naturally necesitates the need for more food, so everything just naturally falls back into line.

One of my exes absolutely hated anything 'oriental'. I lived on Thai take-out for several weeks after that one.

Best to you!

Edited February 26, 2004 by s'kat (log)

[Tmnoland]

I'm seeing a lot of bland foods. Funny, when I'm in pain, be it emotional or physical, I take comfort from spicy food. Indian, Thai - anything that inflicts pain. The pain from peppers distracts me. If you see me veging out in front of the tube with a bowl of those little pickled jalapeno slices, it must be BAD.

--therese

[Ondine]

Ooh, and I thought I was making progress.

Last night I had a remarkably callous phone call from the now-ex in which he chirpily recounted how very happy he was to have walked out; no, there was no hope of getting back together, or even being friends.

And I'd only just started eating again! I'm guessing it's time to badger the therapist for happy pills.

Pan: Yes, he is that expensive. That is because he is the best, without exaggeration. Other clients have moved interstate and overseas to see him.

What was the recipe for those cookies again, suzilightning?

[Rachel Perlow]

Then, I rediscover the joys of wine, cheese, and crackers, and spend many hours over all of these reading through Exorcising Your Ex, still prone though to having intermittent bouts of uncontrollable sobbing.

Here's an eGulletified Amazon link:

Exorcising Your Ex : How to Get Rid of the Demons of Relationships Past by Elizabeth Kuster

Please support eGullet by making Amazon links that give eGullet a commission. Click here for instructions. Thanks.

[s'kat]

I apologise Rachel, as that is just what I tried to do. I began to make the link directly to Amazon, then remembered that you could support eGullet by making the appropriate links. I searched around without finding that info, and finally clicked on the banner ad on the eGullet homepage, thinking that would do it.

Sorry... I'm all about supporting eGullet!

(the original link has now been fixed)

Edited February 26, 2004 by s'kat (log)

[Comfort Me]

Ooh, and I thought I was making progress.

Last night I had a remarkably callous phone call from the now-ex in which he chirpily recounted how very happy he was to have walked out; no, there was no hope of getting back together, or even being friends.

And I'd only just started eating again! I'm guessing it's time to badger the therapist for happy pills.

Pan: Yes, he is that expensive. That is because he is the best, without exaggeration. Other clients have moved interstate and overseas to see him.

What was the recipe for those cookies again, suzilightning?

Why is the the asswipes always have to come back and stir the turd?

Ondine, honey, I think you deserve more than cookies. You need to go out and get the biggest bacon cheeseburger you can find, wash it down with a milkshake, then eat an entire Sara Lee cheesecake (still partially frozen due to impatience) with a can of cherry pie filling. (To someone who keeps kosker, the above prescription is about as sinful as you can get!) When you come out of that sugar coma, it'll be a brand new week.

It ain't gourmet --it's medicinal.

Then you need to start doing exercizes. Take out a piece of paper and write down the 20 nastiest things you could say about your ex. Leave a message with the receptionist at his work that he left his viagra at your place and if he doesn't pick it up, you're throwing it out. Start rumors about how boring he is -- in bed and out.

Remember -- living well is the best revenge. Maybe you should take a much younger lover. (It worked for Demi!) The last time I had an ugly breakup -- way back before Mrs. Me -- I vowed that I could be as miserable as I wanted at home alone, but if I was around people, I had to be up and positive or else I was going to be the big loser.

We are all pulling for you, kid!

[tryska]

Then you need to start doing exercizes.

you know - i'm sure this isn't the exercises comfort me had in mind, but with my last breakup one of the best things i could have done was hit the gym and start seriously lifting weights, and running on a treadmill. they did wonders for letting me get my anger out (throwing heavy stuff around is fun and challenging) and the running basically exhausted me so that i could go to sleep. the added benefit was that with all those endorphins running around in my brain i was remarkably pleasant to be around.

[suzilightning]

that scum sucking piece of vomit

now, more ladylike

i agree with tryska - do some exercise. it is theraputic.

better than chocolate chip cookies here's the official picatinny peak hawkwatch treat:

Fudgy Bourbon Brownies

1/4 cup bourbon

1/4 cup semi sweet chocolate in pieces

1 1/2 cups all purpose flour

1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa

1 tsp baking posder

1/2 tsp salt

1 1/3 cups sugar

6 Tbsp butter, softened

1/2 tsp vanilla extract

2 large eggs

Heat oven to 350 F

Lightly spoon flour into dry measuring cups and level off. Combine the flour, cocoa, baking powder and salt, sifting through a sieve into a bowl. Combine sugar and butter in a large bowl, beat until well creamed. Add vanilla and eggs, beat well

Add flour and bourbon beating at low speed until just combined. Fold in chocolate. spread batter in a 9" baking pan coated with cooking spray. This is a thick batter. Bake 25-30 minutes but no longer. Cool on a rack. Cut while still warm. These are very, very chewey and keep well even in close to freezing temperatures.

Hang in there.