Four New Shows on the Food Network

[Jaymes]

You know, it's funny how it goes with TV channels.  They show a whole bunch of shows, and some of 'em I am interested in watching and others I am not.

[TrishCT]

Wilfrid you are making me laugh so hard I just snorted up my diet coke.... Note to self... Don't read Wilfrid's posts during lunch....

[tommy]

Wilfrid you are making me laugh so hard I just snorted up my diet coke....   Note to self... Don't read Wilfrid's posts during lunch....

let us not forget that i set him up. without me, he'd just be smug. with me, he's smug and funny, smacking those lobs i throw him right out of the park...

[Wilfrid]

All great comedians need a straight guy. Tommy is the closest I could get.

[elyse]

Let me add to Wilfrid's list ....  the sexy Emeril, Wolfgang...my gosh where did they find such hunks... modeling underwear in the Sears catalog?

Ewwww.

[hjshorter]

Let me add to Wilfrid's list ....  the sexy Emeril, Wolfgang, and Alton...my gosh where did they find such hunks... modeling underwear in the Sears catalog?

Um, I think Alton Brown is kinda sexy.

Of course, he looks a lot like my husband.

[elyse]

Let me add to Wilfrid's list .... the sexy Emeril, Wolfgang, and Alton...my gosh where did they find such hunks... modeling underwear in the Sears catalog?

Um, I think Alton Brown is kinda sexy.

Of course, he looks a lot like my husband.

Does he blind you with science?

[tommy]

Does he blind you with science?

[hjshorter]

Let me add to Wilfrid's list ....   the sexy Emeril, Wolfgang, and Alton...my gosh where did they find such hunks... modeling underwear in the Sears catalog?

Um, I think Alton Brown is kinda sexy.

Of course, he looks a lot like my husband.

Does he blind you with science?

Only when I ask him to. And yes, Thomas Dolby does come to mind when I'm watching good eats.

Actually, he and Alton looked more alike before Alton put on 30 pounds.

Edited April 14, 2003 by hjshorter (log)

[GordonCooks]

I did spend a lot time in the kitchen this weekend making sauces/stock so the TV was on a lot of the time. I wanted to see how bad some of these shows really were.

Cookworks - I thought it was ok, seemed like it's geared to novices.

Paula's Home Cooking - Not good. Grease and more grease. I wouldn't be surprised to see a recipe for Beer Batter french fries and Lard cakes.

Lighten Up - god-awful - I turned it off.

Barefoot Contessa - Bad, You could condense the show into a 2 minute commercial

[elyse]

And yes, Thomas Dolby does come to mind when I'm watching good eats.

Actually, he and Alton looked more alike before Alton put on 30 pounds.

I wonder if Alton's looks had anything to do with his schtick.

[beans]

Hi y'all.

Whew! This was some good reading from someone who has recently escaped the wounds inflicted by all of those budget minded mommies that are all in blind admiration for Ms. Paula Deen's show and will beat you to a pulp should you point out one little vile observation of the woman's poor kitchen manners or what she deems as cooking.

I am so disappointed with FTV. What do they think they are accomplishing with those insulting shows as How to Boil Water, Cookworks, Date Plate, Lighten Up, Food Fight? And the new bevie of hotties! Oh for heavens sake that tiny Giada is stirring up all of those frumpy women to cast their Cheetos stained fingers at discrediting her for not being a "real" chef and worry if she eats what she cooks on her show! Who cares! Geesz!

Well, needless to say I ran kicking and screaming from their frustrating almost communisitic propaganda, self serving, message boards. (Well socialistic at the very least!) Deletions of posts are inconsistent, at best and a weak attempt to overinflate a particular show or program hosts' popularity. Boak. Reveling in the joys of an open air market with the freshest, seasonal and most regionalised representations in produce, one is subjected to yet more sniping insults for being a snob. Snob? Okay, I'll accept that. At least I'm not a show host demonstrating how to cook something as pedestrian as hamburgers or making a "salad" out of disgusting Ramen Pride noodles. (Uuuuuggggghhhh, salt, fat and msg -- yum, yum, YUM). Give me morels, key limes, blood oranges, golden raspberries, purple peruvian potatoes, Queen Anne cherries when any and/or all are in season, ANYDAY!! Supermarkets are for replacing your detergents, pvc film wrap and garbage bags! (can you get the "vibe" as I was accused of having that I'm absurdly in love with shopping for ingredients and shop for quality instead of convenience? Bleh, so what.)

What about dangling a carrot to inspire Alton to conjure up some new concepts? What about signing on lovely Caprial Pence?

Oh FTV, you have disappointed me so. It makes me sad.

Thank you for indulging me....

Glad to be here and I look forward to your acquaintance!

Edited May 18, 2003 by beans (log)

[Chef/Writer Spencer]

Welcome to the home of the culinarily disenfranchised...Get your ticket up front and hang on....

I hope you have thick skin too...

Edited May 18, 2003 by Chef/Writer Spencer (log)

[beans]

Ohh, I do. Not new to forum life and tongue in cheek is always healthy. Differences of opinion are great as it gives me a moment to view life vicariously through another's eyes. I manage the debate arena fairly well and have never seemed to have fear of expressing meself, probably from day one too!

It's taking a bit of time to grapple all of the various boards/subjects/personalities. But another forumite pal of mine steered me to this one and she is the *GREATEST* for sharing the existence of this exciting on-line community.

Thank you for the welcome!

[elyse]

Well, needless to say I ran kicking and screaming from their frustrating almost communisitic propaganda, self serving, message boards.  (Well socialistic at the very least!)  Deletions of posts are inconsistent, at best and a weak attempt to overinflate a particular show or program hosts' popularity.  Boak.  Reveling in the joys of an open air market with the freshest, seasonal and most regionalised representations in produce, one is subjected to yet more sniping insults for being a snob.  Snob?  Okay, I'll accept that.  At least I'm not a show host demonstrating how to cook something as pedestrian as hamburgers or making a "salad" out of disgusting Ramen Pride noodles.  (Uuuuuggggghhhh, salt, fat and msg -- yum, yum, YUM).  Give me morels, key limes, blood oranges, golden raspberries, purple peruvian potatoes, Queen Anne cherries when any and/or all are in season, ANYDAY!! 

Remember though, that a lot of the country doesn't have access to these ingredients. Likewise, the point of the channel is to get people to cook ANYTHING including burgers and "interesting" salads. When you first started cooking, did you visit the farmer's market looking for golden raspberries and Peruvian potatoes? I dare say you began with the basics. If it was a souffle or millefeuille, kudos to you.

The network must appeal to a range of viewers.

And welcome!

Edited May 18, 2003 by elyse (log)

[Chef/Writer Spencer]

New pundits welcome I say...anyone I can turn to the darkside is a goodthing.

[elyse]

Spencer, you silly! You know I hate TVFN! My hatred causes me to miss Tony's show too. But I don't begrudge them the basic cooking shows, I just want more of the advanced stuff. Or some of it.

[David Leite]

I'd love to get a Food Network exec in a Q and A on eGullet.

CWS, what you need is to get your own show on TVFN. That would put all your free-radical energy and rantings to good, and might I add entertaining, use. But they'd have to bleep you all #!%^! time .

[Chef/Writer Spencer]

I'd love to get a Food Network exec in a Q and A on eGullet.

CWS, what you need is to get your own show on TVFN. That would put all your free-radical energy and rantings to good, and might I add entertaining, use. But they'd have to bleep you all #!%^! time .

Well, I'll be damned...I even turned D. Leite to the darker shades...Welcome maricon, leave me the last bloodsicle. Let me tell you that's high praise from a guy I respect for his contributions to food writing...Thanks for the backhanded compliment...I don't deserve any better...And I agree with you, I'd be the Colin Ferrell of TFN for sure.

Me...The Food Network? What's the point...Obviously, my whole schtick is based on the improbability that Julie Cordes really gives a rat's dick about food, and that Bobby Flay has a single flesh wound on him due to a kitchen accident. I won't be groomed, manipulated and packaged like some culinary Ken doll. I'd rather stick my taint in a Cuisinart and turn it to mortally ground that listen to some pretty debutant tell me I missed my mark. "Cut, let's do it again." That's not how it works in my world, regardless of the potential celebrity and cult following I may amass. It's hard to believe that someone as unknown as myself would turn their nose up at the whole TV chef thing...but I promise you I'll be nice but short if ever approached. It's not gonna happen anyways, come on, I'll never milk this thing properly. I've been voted the most likely to become the culinary Jimmy the Greek. I'm gonna insult someone's momma one day, after my only bail out has long since abandoned me...It's only a matter of time before I'm back to the everyday grind of line cooking and dreaming of getting a Michelin star. It's not a shabby deal by any means. Beats stagefright...

Edited May 19, 2003 by Chef/Writer Spencer (log)

[pariah_kerry]

[i'd rather stick my taint in a Cuisinart and turn it to mortally ground that listen to some pretty debutant tell me I missed my mark.  "Cut, let's do it again."  That's not how it works in my world, regardless of the potential celebrity and cult following I may amass.

That was some brutal imagery.

Whatever you do, involve puppetry. You could do "Les Guignols de l'Info" for food. The Bourdain puppet would have to be the flagship episode.

[tan319]

What was that chicks name that hosted?

Some silly name like Sissy Biggers?

yeah. she was sure perky. but she's sure no paige davis.

spencer, who would want to be jacqui?!? her job was to be abused and ignored by booby flay. i couldn't watch the show as i felt so bad for her.

Don't hate me, but I always... had a thing for Sissy. That overbite, sassy smile and those legs!

Please forgive me.

And I dug jacqie in the early,early days too.

One thing that I always wondered about. Were Bobby and her an item for awhile?

I remember her exclaiming on camera during the early days, when the show was outdoors, that her and bobby had just shared their "1st" onscreen kiss.

[beans]

elyse:

Thank you.

I grew up shopping with my mum and grandmum in open air, multiple stand farmers markets with individual butchers, fish mongers, and various purveyors of cheese, dairy products, spices, pastas, nuts and flowers. I learned early about seasonal, fresh and regional. So, yes, I did start off with exotics as gooseberries, golden raspberries, morels, etc. I used to buy cookbooks merely to read and have insight to the person writing it. So, by the time FTV came around, I wasn't into to it to watch someone cook a hamburger and top it with a fried egg. I was well beyond someone opening up a box of this premix or a this or that, and with additional butter, cream cheese and mediocre vanilla and voila call that baking! (both courtesy of Paula Deen) I have been a long time fan of Jacques Torres and that's the stuff I want. Inspiration or watching a master without effort demonstrate some amazing technique. But most important, stress to the home cook about the value of what is in season, what is regional, what is looking particularly good at the market, etc.

And if it is something I can't find in my market and I need it -- I either ask my vendor to seek it out and/or I mail order!

**********

tan319:

Regarding Bobby and Jacqui, I knew of a French Culinary grad who did say that too. Maybe.

Edited May 19, 2003 by beans (log)

[elyse]

Beans, you may have had a culinarily idyllic childhood, and that's great. But you can't expect that of the entire country. It would be rediculous.

[howard88]

It seems that most of what needed saying on this topic has been said. I would just add; Sissy Biggers was more attractive before she had the breast reduction and Jill Cordes has to spit the food out of her mouth that she test tastes. The woman could care less about food.

[tommy]

It seems that most of what needed saying on this topic has been said.  I would just add; Sissy Biggers was more attractive before she had the breast reduction and Jill Cordes has to spit the food out of her mouth that she test tastes.  The woman could care less about food.

i know jill personally, and i can assure you that she is very much interested in food. not sure about sissy's boobs, though.