eG Foodblog: Fat Guy - A Normal Week

[racheld]

You may be right. Cape Cod just may be the onion ring Mecca of the world.

And the best rings of all time have to be these:

They are not just rings, but strips and shreds and long curling loops of crackly-sheathed onion. And I don't think there's a ring on that plate---it's a continuous Moebius puzzle of one infinitely unscrolling, crisp-coated, golden, unforgettably perfect example of the fryer's art. No beginning and no end in sight.

What if the apple in Eden had been an onion. . .

[Pan]

Fat Guy, the singular of panini is panino.

Blog on.

[Fat Guy]

a continuous Moebius puzzle of one infinitely unscrolling, crisp-coated, golden, unforgettably perfect example of the fryer's art. No beginning and no end in sight.

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That was actually our second choice for the eGullet Society slogan. Sometimes I regret that we didn't go with it.

[johnnyd]

Great storytelling FG. The Bob's Sub & Cone episode was heroic. And this nugget:

My sister insisted that I transcribe the following quote from her: “My life’s ambition is to have a recipe on my brother’s website. Now I’ve achieved it, and there’s nowhere to go but down.”

Sounds a lot like my crew.

[Josefinajoisey]

Dayummmm....great blog, great timing (we were at the Cape the same week), great memories. Brought back great memories of when we would bring my son to the Cape (now he's a hulking hs sophomore). We had the dog this trip, too. Cape real estate rental offerings are not very pet friendly...we've had good luck with Internet rental sites.

Did you find the Cottage Bakery in Orleans? Fantastic 'dirt bombs' (muffins/doughnuts)

Welcome home...I'm still trying to hang on to my vacation 'buzz'!

[Fat Guy]

There are limits to what the human mind and body can endure, and I’m sure you’ll agree we exceeded those limits yesterday. We started at 4:30am, so we could get showered and mostly packed before waking PJ up, addressing his morning needs, doing the rest of the packing and hitting the road. (It wasn’t possible to do all the packing the night before – there were too many dependencies with respect to baby stuff we’d need in the morning, refrigerated stuff, bags that couldn’t be closed until one last thing was added, etc.)

We made it as far as the Fairhaven, MA, exit before PJ needed further attention, so we pulled off and, lo and behold, there was the Fairhaven Wal-Mart. This was not one of the nicer Wal-Marts (Fairhaven and the surrounding areas – New Bedford, Fall River – seem pretty depressed) but it did have a little cafeteria area in which to feed PJ. At this point it was 9-something in the morning and we already felt ready to drop dead. PJ found it all highly entertaining, though.

The one bummer about the Fairhaven exit was that there weren’t any decent coffee and doughnut places, and in our emotional state at the time this was a major issue for us. We got back on the highway feeling defeated, however at the very next exit, New Bedford (pronounced “New Bed-faahd” if you’re actually from there), there was a sign for a Dunkin’ Donuts so we figured that would do. Then, a pleasant surprise ensued: Ellen spied, right across the street from the Dunkin’ Donuts, a totally crummy looking place called Honey Dew, which seemed to be the equivalent of Dunkin’ Donuts but indigenous to the region, and had a lot more cars in its parking lot. Also, right up the street from the Honey Dew was a Shell station with gas for $2.80 a gallon – unheard of in this part of the country right now (it was well over $3 everywhere else we got gas on this trip). Honey Dew did not disappoint. Not only were the accents of the cashiers amazingly genuine “Can aah help who’s next he-ah!” but also the doughnuts were superb. I tried a few items, the best of which was the “honey dip stick,” kind of like a glazed cruller but not twisted. I took a photo of it resting on my leg as Ellen drove.

We made it to New Haven, CT, around lunchtime and, after visiting an ailing relative, we went to Ellen’s parents’ house for a light lunch. The basil, tomatoes and cucumbers were coming in, and Ellen’s mother procured some fresh local corn, so we had salad, corn and some leftover Sally’s pizza from the night before (Sally’s is not open for lunch).

We left New Haven around 3pm and got back to Manhattan around 5pm. It took a solid half hour to unload the car, which gave us 30 minutes to get cleaned up and changed for the evening’s event.

The evening’s event? Yes, you are now basically at the half-way point of our day yesterday. We still had a party to go to in Quogue.

Those of you familiar with New York geography will probably have dropped something or spit milk out your noses by now. For those of you who aren’t, Quogue is a beach community and barrier island way out on the South shore of Long Island. It’s part of the area known as the Hamptons, and many people will tell you that Quogue (pronounced “Qwog”) is the nicest part of the Hamptons. Anyway, Quogue is really nice, but it takes about two hours to drive there from Manhattan, even though everybody in Quogue has collectively agreed to lie and say it’s “Only 90 minutes from Manhattan!”

We rallied for this expedition, however, because my friend Shelley Clark, who is one of the premier publicists in the hospitality industry, told us this was to be the event of the summer, and when Shelley says something is to be the event of the summer, it will be.

Maybe it wasn’t the event of the summer. It felt more like the event of the century thus far. The primary purpose of the event was that it was an “awareness raiser” (which is kind of like a fundraiser without the overt fundraising pitches) for the Miami-based Diabetes Research Institute, hosted at the oceanfront home (more like an ocean liner on land, but still technically a home) of Jill and Cliff Viner. A secondary purpose of the event – the reason it was of interest to food media – was to showcase the Barton G. events company and its new chef Richard Blais.

Some of you might remember Richard Blais, who was until recently the Atlanta equivalent of avant-garde chefs Grant Achatz, Wylie Dufresne, et al. Barton G., one of the top event caterers in the world (owned by former figure skater Barton G. Weiss), has just recruited Blais (and his wife) and moved them down to Miami. Barton G. and Blais were at the event, and the food situation was totally out of control, over the top, decadent and unusual – I kept thinking it was like Ferran Adria’s bar mitzvah.

There were a number of food stations, some of which were showcasing “molecular gastronomy” and others of which were just serving really good normal food. Blais and his wife were handling the “liquid nitrogen martini bar” and a station serving transglutimate noodles in three varieties. The liquid nitrogen martinis and cocktails were centered around little steaming white cylinders of frozen vodka (yes, you can freeze Vodka solid – if you happen to have a 400-pound tank of liquid nitrogen at your disposal). The vodka would slowly melt into the cocktail, making it stronger as it would melt – just the opposite of how melting ice normally affects a cocktail. Blais’s lovely wife patiently demonstrated the creation of one of these cocktails, while I photographed it badly.

This is the noodle station. The noodles were made from proteins like shrimp and chicken, not from grain. The shrimp ones were particularly tasty.

The thing that was so neat, and amusing, about these stations was that you see similar food plated preciously at the high-end avant-garde restaurants, but here they were doing it for 300+ people in a buffet format, like, no big deal, this is just the food we’re serving today. It was really incongruous and wonderful, and maybe even a sign of things to come.

As I mentioned, there was also regular food, which was great too. Most noteworthy was the shellfish bar, where they took giant shrimp, lobster tails, king crab and blue crab and built seafood cocktails to order, with a choice of sauces. The display was overwhelmingly abundant, and so were the portions. I don’t often max out on shellfish. This may even have been the first time. There were several other stations, but another worth mentioning was the meat station, where they were grilling lamb chops, beef tenderloins and other stuff – you just walked up, asked for whatever you wanted, and they sliced it to order and gave you twice as much as you’d asked for.

There was also the matter of dessert. After the assembled guests had gorged themselves on the savory cuisine, we all went downstairs to the dessert bar, which featured made-to-order liquid nitrogen ice creams and sorbets in flavors like black olive (and also in more familiar flavors), cotton candy and about a million pastries of all kinds. Here’s Blais in front of the liquid nitrogen ice cream window.

What did all this have to do with diabetes? Well, all of this food, delicious as it was, was also part of a nutritional demonstration. All of the savory food was low-carb, and all the desserts were – get this – sugar free. Blais and I tasted and retasted the ice creams and sorbets together, discussed the matter and agreed that there was no way either of us could tell they were made with a sugar substitute (they were using a variant of Splenda). With most of the other desserts, we could detect differences – sometimes in texture, sometimes there was an aftertaste – but the stuff was still damn impressive. The moral of the story being that if Richard Blais, his wife, his pastry chef and Barton G. do all the cooking around your house you don’t really have to make any sacrifices, even if you have diabetes. Well, maybe the moral is something else. This is a copy of the planned menu, which is fairly accurate though there were a few last-minute changes. Close enough, though.

The final event of the evening – I know, it never ends – was a rousing, heartfelt, intimate performance by the great Patti LaBelle, who has been living with diabetes for a decade, on a specially constructed stage over the pool.

Then we had to drive home. My mother had been babysitting PJ and Momo, so I put her in a cab back to her apartment on the Upper West Side, took Momo out and collapsed in bed – I didn’t even have the strength to take my socks off.

So, that’s it for my foodblog this week. Thanks, everyone, for reading along, and thanks to Susan in FL and the eG Foodblogs team for making it happen!

[Susan in FL]

I'm sorry for the period of time that this topic was mistakenly closed! Please feel free to post ending questions and comments through tomorrow.

[dockhl]

FG~

All I can say is WOW........from start to finish, everyhting from the food to your endurance ! Great blog.

And what an amazing bash to end it with........

[Rebecca263]

This is the first time in many a moon that I have missed my old life as a denizen of the Miami Beach social scene. BartonG parties RULE!

Thanks, for your amazing blog. I enjoyed your vacation immensely, it brought back happy memories of our trips wth Kiddle at that age. I've spent hours reminiscing about great summers past since seeing your photos and reading your posts this week. I think that you and Ellen and PJ make a great combo, charm, charm and charm!

Be well, and enjoy every moment!

Again, THANK YOU!

[MarketStEl]

So...an ordinary week with an extraordinary finish!

I imagine you're still saddle sore from all that driving yesterday.

Great blog--it's given me a powerful hankerin' for a fried seafood platter. That picture-perfect platter you had is etched in my memory. Thanks for taking us along for the ride.

[ludja]

Thanks for a great blog, Fat Guy!

Like a few others, it brought back wonderful memories of family vacations on the Cape. We used to rent cottages in the Wellfleet/Eastham/Truro area so you went to many of the same places and beaches as we did.

A well-rested baby is a happy baby and it seems like PJ had a great trip as well. I love the ice cream photo--the rapt expression on his face and knowing it was his first ice craem cone was just priceless.

Talk about finishing a blog with a bang as well!

Thanks for sharing a 'typical' week with us!

[KatieLoeb]

Great blog, FG! Thanks for sharing everything with us, from the mundane to the spectacular. Lots of photos of PJ and Momo were an added bonus, but the end of week Diabetes bash was off the hook! Wow!

[racheld]

It's been a wonderful week, with all the traveling and beaching and ordering of all things from the sea and deep-fryer. And your family!! Traveling with a little one is a thing apart, and I admire all of you young folks who undertake such a pack-a-lot, stop-a-lot, can't-stop-there task.

I loved the views of Cape Cod---I think you CAN be homesick for somewhere you've never been. Your PJ is quite a trouper, entering into the spirit of everything with equal aplomb and delight--to whom wet sand is Disneyland and a Wal-Mart basket the Magic Teapot ride.

And MoMo---he's reminded me all week of my Grand-Dogs, both big ole Georgia boys, and both sweet and loyal friends. Thanks for letting us tag along on your travels.

You and Ellen are both very lucky.

[Anna N]

Enjoyed every word and photo of your blog, Steven.

[johnnyd]

Outstanding party! What a finale to a week away. Killer BartonG menu, I must say. I'm still wraping my brain around the fact that a drink is getting stronger as the "ice" melts. Thank you FG! As the first-ever foodblogger on eGullet (what was that one? three days? one and a half pages? no photos??) this was a classic edition.

Cheers

[Kouign Aman]

A crawling, chowing-down baby, a dog and fried food. It was wonderful. The party at the end was the contrasting crunch of the nuts on the top of the banana split.

Thanks for blogging. Happy 1 year of parenthood.

[little ms foodie]

Wow! that was fun! I've never been to the Cape and thought everything was very interesting. Love the family interactions and photos- well done!! thank you!

[christine007]

Thanks for this wonderful blog. Onion rings are a thing that is dear to my heart, and I loved hearing your opinions about the ones you had!

[Pan]

The photos of that Diabetes Foundation event were a first for eGullet! What an extraordinary event! Thanks for sharing some of an event such as we ordinary food-lovers will never see.

[judiu]

The photos of that Diabetes Foundation event were a first for eGullet! What an extraordinary event! Thanks for sharing some of an event such as we ordinary food-lovers will never see.

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What he said and more! WOW, whatta trip! Thanks, F.G. and family, for a wonderful blog.

[snowangel]

From down-home and fried, to a child who was gleeful while his folks were beyond exhausted (people are still telling us that they will grow up and leave home!) to frozen vodka? In four way-too-short pages, you have taken us from hither to yon like I don't think any other blogger has done. Let's see you do it again in another three years.

And, tell Ellen I miss the missives from her adventures.

[mizducky]

Oh. My. God. What a killer finale that party was. I think they almost *had* to get somebody like Patti LaBelle to be the musical guest just to stand up to the food.

This blog has featured a few of my favorite things in the universe (the food and the special feel of the Cape; and as a budding eccentric auntie to the world, I confess to shamelessly flirting with happy small children in restaurants every chance I get). And sir, your observation of these events was top-notch. I will long remember that whole tale of PJ discovering the joys of feeding Momo--I'm still trying to hear in my head the "quacking" sound your son made (and not just because of my nickname), and pondering the wisdom of Momo to so perfectly understand what PJ had to say.

The only thing tempering my now-raging nostalgia for the Northeast is strenuously reminding myself of what the weather's usually like back there.

Bravo!

Edited August 28, 2006 by mizducky (log)

[Rebecca263]

Just in case anyone wants to know more about BartonG or this VERY deserving charity.

[Chufi]

Thanks FG I really enjoyed it! especially the sunny beaches and all that fried food! You have a wonderful family. Thanks for sharing this 'normal' week with us.

[I_call_the_duck]

WOW! Thanks for sharing your week with us. I'm in love with your son and dog.

Edited August 28, 2006 by I_call_the_duck (log)