Ideas for an Anti-Valentine's Day Cocktail?

[paulraphael]

This if for a party called Slaughtered Hearts Klub Massacre and Dance ... theme will be anti-valentines. Everyone will be as unatractive as can be, will flaunt their loneliness, and be asked (probably unconvincingly) to observe the no-hookup rule.

I'm thining it should be

-red

-sour

-bitter

It shouldn't actually be disgusting, but it might have ingredients that sound questionable. Like Godiva liqueur.

Except for the last part, I'm a big fan of the Negroni. But we're open to trying something new or inventing something.

Any ideas?

[Mjx]

Alkaseltzer. For... heartburn. Sorry. But it is about the most unromanic thing I can think of, aside from prune juice. I don't actually think prune juice is disgusting, so how about prune juice, tonic water, and gin?

Bailey's (which I do find disgusting) and gin? With a sour grape as a garnish?

Why should it be red? Red so all Valentine's Day-ish. But if you want red and bitter, there's always Campari.

[natasha1270]

From Martha: Bleeding Heart Martini

[TongoRad]

I don't know what it's called, but I've had a prosecco cocktail (with a little Campari and lemon juice) that would probably fit the bill. Definitely has bitter and tart elements, and is on the red side.

[haresfur]

How about my Bitter, Bitter, Bitter, Bitter:

Had people over - not a drinking crowd but a couple of people appreciated the knickerbockers. I was in the mood for something bitter, bitter, bitter so I had:

2 oz Campari

1 tsp Fernet

ice,

stir,

top with Italian Bitter lemon soda

3 shakes Fees Aromatic bitters

Puckering and refreshing.

The Fernet Branca should meet the discusting (to some) criterion. It certainly is high maintenance. And highballs built in the glass are convenient for parties. You can use Italian soda or (English?) bitter lemon soda.

[Mano]

"The Pathetic Loser."

2 oz Five O'Clock gin

1 tbs red MD 20/20

ice, shake, strain and serve in a low profile olive jar with a ripped paper drink umbrella

Edited January 24, 2011 by Mano (log)

[Mjx]

"The Pathetic Loser."

2 oz Five O'Clock gin

1 tbs red MD 20/20

ice, shake, strain and serve in a low profile olive jar with a ripped paper drink umbrella

HAH! That reminds me of 'The soiled Kimono':

HOW TO MAKE

A SOILED KIMONO

Mix 2/3 glass costly

French champagne

With 1/3 glass Japanese

plum wine

And top with a

paper butterfly.

But that might taste good. How about some Danish tippling, with the 'Fire Truck'?

Take a plastic cup, and tip in some Jægermeister. Top up with Red Bull. Drink. Repeat until you feel jolly enough to begin dancing.

[chileheadmike]

How's about a Rusty Nail?

Scotch

Drambuie (SP)

[Lisa Shock]

Does it have to be red? What about blue -which usually has the opposite connotations of red? That said, I cannot think of a decent blue drink.

Pomegranate juice is sour and red, how about using it in a gin-based daisy, where you substitute fresh grapefruit juice for the lemon/lime to give it a bitter boost? Garnish with a 'twist' of the grapefruit rind, but, pith only -discarding the outer rind usually used for a twist.

[David A. Goldfarb]

My wife and I are planning to go to Purple Yam for their special Maine-themed Valentine's Day menu, but they're serving it the Saturday before Valentine's day, which happens to be Lincoln's Birthday, and I would think that a cocktail inspired by Lincoln's Birthday could be fairly unromantic.

Edited January 25, 2011 by David A. Goldfarb (log)

[jsmeeker]

To me, "red and bitter" says Campari.

[Big Mike]

"The Pathetic Loser."

2 oz Five O'Clock gin

1 tbs red MD 20/20

ice, shake, strain and serve in a low profile olive jar with a ripped paper drink umbrella

Brilliant

[EvergreenDan]

How about my Bitter, Bitter, Bitter, Bitter:

This is scarily close to my drink of the same name:

http://www.kindredcocktails.com/cocktail/bitter-bitter-bitter-bitter

2 oz Aperol (or Campari)

1/2 oz Lemon juice

1 t Fernet Branca

3 ds Old Fashion bitters

5 ds Lemon bitters

2 oz Seltzer

OP: Lot's of Campari ideas, if you're interested:

http://www.kindredcocktails.com/cocktail?index_type=0&ingredient=Campari

[mkspriing]

JAMES BROWN (GODFATHER OF FUNK)

INGREDIENTS

30ml Chambord

15ml Sloe Gin

30ml funkin Blackcurrant Puree

15ml funkin Pure Pour Lemon Juice

20ml funkin Sugar Syrup

1 Espresso Shot

GLASS

A Tall Vintage Style Glass

GARNISH

Crushed Ice Crown

[EvergreenDan]

Want prunes? It's quite good.

Dirt in my Drink

1 oz Batavia Arrack

1 oz Cynar

1 oz Prune juice

1/2 oz Rye

1/2 oz Lime juice

[EvergreenDan]

Oh, my. Please accept my most sincere apologies to haresfur. This was his creation, which I slightly adapted only because I couldn't find bitter lemon. I had incorrect attribution notes when I imported this recipe into Kindred Cocktail this past summer. Again, my apologies to haresur. I have updated Kindred Cocktails to credit haresfur as the creator.

[cdh]

Why not just straight Campari?

[Katie Meadow]

For violence there's always a Black and Blue Shooter. But nothing says no romance like Mezcal with a worm.

[janeer]

Red is all wrong, that says Valentine. And I'm offended by the use of Campari, my favorite summer drink. I suggest black. Something foul, like a licorice martini, colored with black food coloring.

[haresfur]

Oh, my. Please accept my most sincere apologies to haresfur. This was his creation, which I slightly adapted only because I couldn't find bitter lemon. I had incorrect attribution notes when I imported this recipe into Kindred Cocktail this past summer. Again, my apologies to haresur. I have updated Kindred Cocktails to credit haresfur as the creator.

No worries mate! Sent you a pm.

[vice]

My mind, too, instantly went to Campari and the Negroni. Perhaps an indication that direction is too on the nose? Then how about one of the many fabulous riffs: Tiare's Signora Rossa subs out gin for mezcal, yielding a potion redolent of scorched hearts and burnt bridges (incidentally, I'm on the fence about her coup de grace--a squeeze of lime. Just doesn't sit right with me, but YMMV).

[Beebs]

Why a red drink? When I think anti-Valentine, something Halloween-y comes to mind. Something revolting-looking, perhaps a riff on a Halloween drink? Red, pink, & white just scream Valentines Day to me.

[haresfur]

Another Campari variation with a great name and fitting back-story is this one from Erik Ellestad:

Some friends asked me to come up with a cocktail for a collaborative zine project they are working on.

The zine is based around a group of wood cuts and illustrations by one of the artists.

Criteria:

Crab malice. An angry crab on rocks in a glass. The cocktail of choice for a certain octopus who lives in the waters near Alcatraz. The octopus is in love with a swimmer. They can never be together for obvious reasons. oh yeah, as in the past and as it will probably be in the future, parts of the city are underwater.

A bittersweet and whimsical love triangle.

This one stumped me for quite a while. For obvious reasons I thought it should be bitter, but wasn't sure what to use for a base spirit. The deadline for the project actually passed. But a note of salvation! The deadline had been extended! Then yesterday, uh duh, Campari occurred to me. Sheesh! Red like a crab!

Crab Malice Cocktail

1 1/2 oz Campari

3/4 oz White Cuban Style Rum

3/4 oz Lime Juice

1/4 oz Cointreau

Shake with ice and strain into an ice filled glass. Top with soda water or selzer.

Whew! We've got bitterness and a nice red crab-like color. A nautical theme from the rum and the bubbles from the selzer. Actually, now thinking, a nice long lime peel twist made with a vegetable peeler around the side of the glass would up the aromatic quotient, and be kind of sea weedy. As a special bonus, it's pretty darn tasty and refreshing, as long as you don't mind bitterness (no super tasters need apply!)

edit - The only cocktail that I sort of had in mind when making this was the Jasmine. Similar ingredients, but inverted proportions to make up for using selzer and rocks. Aside from the Americano, is there anything else it is similar to?

[paulraphael]

These suggestsions are all amazing. We may have to have a pre-party to test cocktails.

The winner will likely be something we mix by the pitcher, since we are not merely bitter but lazy.

[Lisa Shock]

The idea of black has seemed very appealing over the past few days. Cruzan blackstrap rum is very close to being black in color, and, if served in blue tinted glassware would make a very cool black and blue drink. It also has a lightly bitter, almost burnt, flavor -which would be perfect.

Some basic ideas:

The Dead Date

black rum & tonic with no citrus, place a dried date on the rim as a garnish

The Corazón Libre

black rum & cola (I prefer Jolt) float a kumquat on top

For a large quantity drink, David Wondrich's Rum Punch is excellent, and if you use the black rum you will get a very black drink.