The eGullet Hall of Shame

[Ravac]

Like the original poster, I too do not own, nor have ever read, Julia's seminal work Mastering the Art of French Cooking. I do have The Way to Cook, which "I got" when I got married, as it belonged to my wife. But my biggest source for recipes to try has become the internet.

I have terrible knife skills. There is only one setting: rough chop. The finer I need something, the longer I chop.

I have never roasted a chicken. I've roasted turkeys, and even a few ducks, but never a chicken. And I really enjoy a simple, roasted chicken.

I hardly ever make stock. Base in a jar is far too convenient.

Tuna-noodle casserole is concocted on a regular basis. So is 'macaroni salad' with nothing but elbows, mayo, and onion flakes.

Pasta sauce from a jar is frequently employed. (Though I blame my wife for this - she's addicted to Classico's Vodka Sauce for some reason despite my insistence it's nothing more that re-purposed condensed tomato soup.)

After 40+ years, I've just discovered I like greens. (Collards, chard, kale, etc.) Avocados also fall into this category. Who knew something both waxy and slimy could be so good?

I hate parsley.

Edited January 29, 2010 by Ravac (log)

[abooja]

I make a meal out of Cheez-Its more often than I'd care to admit.

I, too, love "Mexican Casserole" with canned tamales, canned chili, cheddar, onions, jalapenos, and Fritos. Haven't had it in years. I doubt my stomach would tolerate it well these days.

I think Taco Bell tastes great, but I very rarely eat it. My arteries thank me.

Edited January 29, 2010 by abooja (log)

[Beebs]

*ahem*... I LIKE ketchup on my hotdogs. Also mustard. AND onions. Not relish so much.

So there.

There is help available....

I didn't think there was room for such a high horse in a discussion about the Hall of Shame for food.

That being said, I, too, consume hot dogs with ketchup on them. So there...

I have also been known to add tuna to my blue box mac and cheese and once in a rare while will get a hankering for those horrendous tamales in a can and eat every last one of them.

I like hot dogs with ketchup, ballpark mustard, AND relish. I really like the $1.00 hot dogs from IKEA. So there.

(I also like IKEA's Swedish meatballs with the gloopy gravy. There is a bag of them in my freezer right now, just asking to be consumed... which I shall do for dinner tonight.)

[Kerry Beal]

(I also like IKEA's Swedish meatballs with the gloopy gravy. There is a bag of them in my freezer right now, just asking to be consumed... which I shall do for dinner tonight.)

Brilliant idea - I was just trying to figure out what I'd have for dinner tonight - got the frozen meatballs but I'll have to make my own gloppy gravy.

I like their Ikea dogs as well - but I'm Canadian - so it's mustard and sweet pickle relish.

[kykr13]

*ahem*... I LIKE ketchup on my hotdogs. Also mustard. AND onions. Not relish so much.

So there.

Same, and I live near Chicago where such an admission would bring silence to the streets. I also choose New York style pizza, and would rather have that ketchup-laden hot dog than Chicago pizza any day...

[Stephanie Brim]

I'm fond of both ketchup and mustard on hotdogs, lots of sweet relish, and a few onions. Buttered and toasted bun, please. All-beef or beef and pork hot dog only.

My favorite is Hebrew National. But I tend to buy Plumpers in a pinch.

[andiesenji]

I'm fond of both ketchup and mustard on hotdogs, lots of sweet relish, and a few onions. Buttered and toasted bun, please. All-beef or beef and pork hot dog only.

My favorite is Hebrew National. But I tend to buy Plumpers in a pinch.

I rarely consume anything resembling a hot dog. However, I have been known to chow down on a Dodger Dog, suitably anointed with the yellow mustard, sweet pickle relish and chopped onions.

After various trials, I have to admit that the ones actually sold at Dodger Stadium taste better than those sold at other sites.

On the other hand, I like bratwurst, preferably charred on the outside, nestled in a toasted bun, with nothing but German-style mustard with the crunchy seeds.

Now I'm hungry for bratwurst - have to dig in the freezer to see if there are some left from my last shipment....

You guys are a baaaaaad influence.

[Jaymes]

As a hot dog lover and traditionalist it shames me to say this, but I once had a hot dog with ketchup on it! Quite by accident of course, but still... I was busy talking to my crazy uncle (everybody has one) at a family get together when my son handed me a half eaten hot dog that he couldn't finish. Without looking I shoved the thing in my mouth not knowing there was ketchup on it. My body went into convulsions and my vital organs started to shut down. Fortunately for me one of my inlaws is a nurse who was able to give me CPR. She put mustard on her lips to counter the effects of the ketchup. It was close, but I was able to pull through.

I was shocked that my own son would put ketchup on a hot dog. So shocked that I had to question my wife regarding the boy's paternity. I almost insisted on a DNA test. For a brief time I thought perhaps John Edwards might be the father. With some tough love my wife and I were able to cure my son of his anti social behavior. He now only puts mustard on his hot dogs.

Hummm....

Perhaps the boy should be the one posting here.

[Lilija]

I got a Costco take and bake pizza warming up in the oven, right this second. FIVE CHEESE! Oh, five cheese, I love you so. I'm gonna wash it down with a Corona.

[Marlene]

(I also like IKEA's Swedish meatballs with the gloopy gravy. There is a bag of them in my freezer right now, just asking to be consumed... which I shall do for dinner tonight.)

Brilliant idea - I was just trying to figure out what I'd have for dinner tonight - got the frozen meatballs but I'll have to make my own gloppy gravy.

I like their Ikea dogs as well - but I'm Canadian - so it's mustard and sweet pickle relish.

I'm Canadian, and I like mustard and ketchup, no sweet pickle relish!

[Isabelle Prescott]

Thanks for the reminder to go to Ikea for their 99 cent breakfast. Forgot about it. I never actually have it... order the more costly one for 1.99.

But, alas, the stock market dump has forced us to get a part time job selling mini bundt cakes at the local Farmers Markets so we can't go out for breakfast anymore.

[rooftop1000]

After scarfing a pile of warm chocolate chip cookies I remembered this thread....Pilsbury Refrigerated Cookie Dough

And I went to my first Indian restaurant this week, I don't know what I had but it was good

tracey

[Pierogi]

*ahem*... I LIKE ketchup on my hotdogs. Also mustard. AND onions. Not relish so much.

So there.

There is help available....

No help required, thank you.

Sometimes.....I want 'kraut dogs with sauerkraut, onions and mustard.

Sometimes.....I want chili dogs with chili, onions and shredded cheese.

Sometimes.....I want mustard dogs with mustard, onions and relish (dill or sweet, both work).

Sometimes.....I want MY dogs with ketchup and onions. And maybe, maybe, a hint of dill relish, not sweet.

And when I want MY dogs with ketchup, I have them with ketchup. If you don't want YOUR dogs with ketchup, that's cool. Don't tell me what to have on MY dogs, and I won't tell you what to have on yours.

[divalasvegas]

Thanks Toliver and Pierogi. No room for being shamed or corrected on the "Hall of Shame."

That being said, in reference to hot dogs and toppings, I often have two at a time and like to top them, as well as a local favorite called half smokes (some kind of local hybrid hotdog/smoked sausage thingies), with one being topped with ***HORRORS*** ketchup AND mayo, the other with mustard and relish, with or without onions, with the onions being either raw or sauteed.

Like all of you I have so many more "shameful" admissions to share and plan to.

But back to the other part of the OP's point:

I do not care for, actually loathe, chocolate and citrus.

I do not want or like to eat bloody rare duck which I find to be both visually and texturally repulsive (much more prefer the Chinese approach which involves succulent meat and crispy skin).

No, no, no to medium rare pork as well.

[Andrew Fenton]

I often enjoy ketchup on hot dogs too, and feel no shame about it. I know it's not traditional, but you know what? Tradition can be kind of stupid.

[John]

Any dog with ketchup on it should be put down!

[Marlene]

I do not want or like to eat bloody rare duck which I find to be both visually and texturally repulsive (much more prefer the Chinese approach which involves succulent meat and crispy skin).

No, no, no to medium rare pork as well.

Amen.

[Lapin d'Argent]

Glad someone understands my attempt at humor.

Fortunately, John, there is help available...

But I just remembered those Pop'n Fresh butterflake rolls...are they as good as they used to be? I'm not sure that any "real" bread could come close to how yummy those things were, especially when pulled apart and slathered with yet more butter. They were a fixture at every holiday meal when I was growing up.

[maggiethecat]

Times three.Rawish duck is just silly. Likewise red tuna. Cook fish!And duck. And pork. Tastes better.

Edited January 31, 2010 by maggiethecat (log)

[divalasvegas]

Times three.Rawish duck is just silly. Likewise red tuna. Cook fish!And duck. And pork. Tastes better.

Three times three AMEN!

Now, back to the shame.

I like Hostess products: especially the chocolate cupcakes (orange sucks), fruit pies, and yes, even twinkies.

Shameful Hostess recipe #1: it's a cryin' shame strawberry short cake using two twinkies, lightly smooshed, covered with defrosted frozen sweetened strawberries.

Shameful Hostess recipe #2: ain't it a shame pie a la mode using heated fruit pie of choice topped with store-bought vanilla ice cream. Really wish they still made the Hostess pudding pies.

Mega Shame: I also like Jello concoctions, including one where lime jello meets cottage cheese, canned crushed pineapple, chopped walnuts and Miracle Whip. I think I need to get in touch with Moopheus' wife so she can make some of that for him as part of her ongoing adventures in jello experiment.

[Darienne]

Was just reading the new thread ' Breakfasts around the World' and discussing same with DH and suddenly remember what could be my contribution to this thread: French toast fingers at Big Boy. OMG Never get to have them because we normally travel westward and they are mostly east and southward. But I remember...

[JAZ]

I do not like any flowers or flower-based extracts in my food or drink. No lavender with duck; no rosewater sorbet; no orange blossom water in ANYthing. Flowers belong in vases or perfumed soap, not in food.

[Kim Shook]

I do not like any flowers or flower-based extracts in my food or drink. No lavender with duck; no rosewater sorbet; no orange blossom water in ANYthing. Flowers belong in vases or perfumed soap, not in food.

I have to agree with you here, Janet. Someone once gave me a mint that had the flavor of violets - tasted like the bottom of an old lady's purse <shudder>. He was very offended at my comparison .

[Mayhaw Man]

When Jiffy Cornbread mix goes on sale for a quarter a box I buy eight.

I believe you and I have talked about this before, but Jiffy is nothing to be ashamed of-ever.

On the other hand, I have alerted the child welfare authorities in your area about your suspected child abuse-this, of course, is based on your decision to keep delicious, much needed, Little Debbie nutrition from your brood. (I myself am particularly partial to Nutty Bars (can eat a box between two pretty close exits on the interstate) and Fudge Swirls. Also, kinda love Oatmeal Cookies, but only a few at the time. They are seriously heavy duty).

That being said...

How bout our boy! He took Murray to the mat on Sunday. Just enough, almost always, just enough. Why wear yourself out when you don't have to.

[John Rosevear]

I believe you and I have talked about this before, but Jiffy is nothing to be ashamed of-ever.

Indeed. I ate a lot of Jiffy cornbread as a kid, and it took a lot of experimentation years later before I was able to make some from scratch that was as good, much less better.

[edited for typo fix]

Edited February 4, 2010 by John Rosevear (log)