The eGullet Hall of Shame

[Lilija]

This thread reads like the PMS thread, wow.

I use more canned beans than dry. In fact, cooking from dry is an "event", where canned beans makes up about half of our weeknight dinners.

I occasionally resort to minced jarred garlic...but it has a different flavor profile than fresh, I swear! (some would say worse...I might agree, but I can't make the right arroz con pollo without it.)

I dislike most raw fish. I dislike anything else with that texture. I will eat spicy tuna, and raw salmon if it is in the TINIEST cubes, or minced. I do like the taste. I do not like chewing it. I think this lists in my shames, because God knows I've tried, oh how I've tried to love sushi. I order the vegetarian sushi platter, nowadays, and it's the best thing ever.

I like cheap wine. Trader Joe's 3 buck chuck, Absolutely! It's good mulled! Saves money for the ($20 a bomber) beer and (I don't look at the pricetag) bourbon.

I like bullion cubes, but not to cook with. I like warming up with a few salt bombs in a mug of boiling water sometimes. It's not a meal. It's not a snack. It's a hot glass of salt-msg-faintly chickeny water. I recognize it for what it is.

Jiffy cornbread mix might be the yummiest instant pancake mix ever. I too stock up when they're on sale.

Edited January 20, 2010 by Lilija (log)

[vice]

I've never understood the appeal of asparagus, in season or not (can't say that I can tell much of a difference). The texture of broccoli florets on the roof of my mouth weirds me out.

[MomOfLittleFoodies]

Top Ramen appears on my shopping list frequently.

I buy Spam 2 cans at a time.

I actually like fast food burgers.

I don't like bleu cheese or cherry/grape tomatoes.

I love Cheetos and Chili Cheese Fritos.

I eat Hamburger Helper once a year.

[haresfur]

I'm not fond of Angostura bitters. I've never tried a Manhattan that I liked. I do plan on learning to like gin, even if it kills me. I like Canadian whiskey and think it's all right to call it rye. I sometimes like sweet drinks and am even willing to drink pink ones.

And on the food front, my father always insisted that real cream be whipped with a hand mixer, not electric... maybe that's why I use the aerosol stuff.

I dislike potatoes unless they are brown and crispy. I do like boxed mac & sleaze (but my home-made stuff is better - especially when I throw in some smoked salmon).

[Dave Hatfield]

I have to admit that I'm addicted to Burger King double whoppers with cheese. I find them hard to resist.

Fortunately for my waistline, here in France there are no Burger Kings. Lots of Mac's which I hate, but no Whoppers. This saves me from my addiction except when we visit England.

Last time we lived in the states two had two big standard poodles, Polly & Kuno, who adored Burger King. As we stopped by the take out window two large heads would poke out the rear window listening intently for the words " Two Junior burgers, hold the mustard & pickles."

Many a server jumped at the sight.

edited to correct typos

Edited January 20, 2010 by Dave Hatfield (log)

[Chufi]

I love bad coffee. I happily drink the bad coffee at the office, and instant coffee at home.

I just can't be bothered to make my own stock (except when I have a chicken carcass after roasting a chicken). So it's cubes most of the time for soups and stews.

I don't care much for truffles.

My guilty pleasure is eating canned split pea soup (they sell them in 1-person-portions here) for lunch. Doesn't taste anything like the real thing, but I like it for what it is.

[Chris Amirault]

It's interesting to note the differences between shameful desires and shameful repulsions. I frankly don't think any dislike can be shameful, but I can't quite explain why.

Thought of another: industrial sour cream and onion potato chips. Artificially flavored only, please; those attempts at "natural" ones are horrible.

[Blether]

Oh yes, the whole range of industrial-chemical-food-science potato crisps from the UK of my youth - flavours including pickled onion, worcester sauce, tomato ketchup and prawn cocktail, and the cheeses of Quavers and Wotsits. I'll grab a bag or two of these when I have access to them.

[John Rosevear]

I have a deep and abiding love for nearly all of the (non-baked, non-"natural", non-"lite") products of the Frito-Lay Company. This was only reinforced after I was diagnosed with celiac last year and discovered that most of my favorites are reliably gluten-free. I have been known to start days with a breakfast of good coffee and Chee-tos.

I have been unable to produce homemade fries that taste better to me than Ore-Ida Shoestrings fried in corn oil. (I do add a little bacon grease for that food-snob touch, though.)

[Kerry Beal]

Custard pudding made from powder - much better tasting with all that vanilla like flavour than the scratch stuff.

[Prawncrackers]

You know I had to really think about this one. What really is shameful? Is it what you think other people would think of you if they knew what you enjoy eating? To me that doesn't count; we've seen with a lot of the responses already that there is a common enjoyment of processed foods - tater tots (whatever they are) and processed cheese being common, so it's not really that shameful is it? It's only because we're all part of this "foodie" organisation and as a collective we like to think that we wouldn't stoop below minimum gastronomic standards lest we be deemed unworthy by our peers. Nonsense, enjoy what you enjoy already, don't think of anyone else! Me, I don't have them often but when I do I love a McD's filetofish, quarter pounder and fries, in that order. I love the crappy free coffee from the vending machines here at work. Like Chufi I have no problem using liquid bouillon for stock when I can't be arsed to make it. I feel no shame at all about any of those things.

However then there is the real shame. The personal shame that you feel that has nothing to do with what other people think. The self-hate* that you feel when you’re actually eating that item of food (usually alone/out of sight) and you are enjoying so much but you know you definitely shouldn’t be! For me that is duck crackling, you know the crispy stuff that remains when you’re rendering a load of trimmings to make pure duck fat. I do it maybe two or three times a year depending on how much confit I’ve been eating. I just can’t resist it, i’ve drained off all that golden fat and I start to nibble. Then before you know it I’ve seasoned it with salt and pepper and it’s all been devoured. It is just so delicious yet at the same time I’m thinking I should have binned this, think of the cholesterol man, I’ll have a heart attack before I’m 40! One time I did bin it, I found myself rescuing a couple of morsels. The shame. The real shame.

* I just wanted to add that there are a lot of real illnesses out there, but I’m not qualified or experienced to go any deeper and besides this is a light-hearted topic, right?

[Kerry Beal]

I gotta say when it comes to shame -I don't really feel it when I'm eating what I like - regardless of how others would look down their nose at me. I feel more shame if I'm stuffing something I don't really like in my mouth - just because I'm hungry and can't be bothered to make or find something I really want.

[Paula E]

Hmm. What does it say about me that the first topic I reply to here is the Hall of Shame?

The short dirty list:

Hostess Pudding Pies. It's a good thing they are difficult to find these days.

Munchos. Tasty fat in a crispy curly wafer. I've heard there is some form of potato in these as well, but it might just be a vicious rumor.

CozyShack chocolate pudding. With whipped cream straight out of the can. And "chocolate" jimmies.

I, too, am a fan of industrial onion dip.

Impling #2 would like to eat her favorite food now, so I'll have to leave off here.

[KaffeeKlatsch]

So many of my secret shames are shared by many of you. It's nice to know that even those who consider themselves foodies are not immune to the lure of processed foods.

My favorite breakfast when I was 18 and on my own for the first time was a honey bun and chocolate milk from the convenience store. Every few years, I have one. It's awful, and I Love it.

I also love Ding Dongs, and the blue box. I mix the mac & cheese with a can of tuna, and a can of drained Leseur peas. I usually add a slice of American cheese to it as well. If I'm feeling really wild, I mix in a can of cream of mushroom soup.

Speaking of cream of mushroom soup. I love Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup. I'll heat up a can and sip it in my largest coffee mug.

I use Better Than Boullion and boxed low-sodium chicken or beef broth. I've also used jarred garlic and ginger.

Velveeta mixed with jarred salsa and some canned cream of tomato soup makes as awesome queso.

Magi

[rooftop1000]

Wait just one second....they don't have Tater Tots in England?

[Fantastic Mr Fox]

It's a good thing i live in the Norhteast US because I am addicted to the tots at Sonic.

My sister lives in Dallas and thinks I go down there to visit her...but it's really for Sonic.

[Moopheus]

Tater Tots always disappoint me--it's the sort of thing I have a craving for from time to time, and then when I give in to it, it's not as good as I thought it was going to be.

[dividend]

I love canned peas. But ONLY Le Sueur Very Young Small Early Peas. I may or may not by them by the case at Costco. Lipton chicken flavored noodles in the pouch. To accompany chicken breaded in crushed potato chips. Actually that's one big guilty pleasure meal.

Brownies from a box with extra chocolate chips added, under-baked a little. Covered in Betty Crocker vanilla frosting. That's my "birthday" cake request.

My mom's tuna noodle casserole, made with a block of Velveeta and cream of mushroom soup. I can't bring myself to buy the stuff to make it, but I will eat a whole pan of it when she makes it for me.

My grandmother used to send me to Wendy's for a hamburger (I would get a breaded chicken sandwich), and then to the McDonald's across the street for fries. I do that a couple times a year, and call it the Grandma Combo. Mom and I used to go to Taco Bell after our weekly piano lessons when I was little, so I still love their meximelts. I try to save those as a treat for when I'm on a road trip, though.

My main shameful confession is that I have no self control around salty junk food. Awful frozen snacks, donuts, bad bar food, all of that I will eat until there's nothing left on the plate. So I don't keep it around. I let other people make it, and don't refuse it when it's offered.

[Reignking]

Tater Tots always disappoint me--it's the sort of thing I have a craving for from time to time, and then when I give in to it, it's not as good as I thought it was going to be.

That reminds me of being in Europe for a while. I had been in Spain for 4 months when I went to Lisbon for a few days. I was excited to find a TGIFriday's, because I knew they would have bad, greasy, American food. I couldn't wait for the bacon-cheese fries, and...they were awful. Such a letdown.

[Busboy]

In 20 minutes, I can walk to a dozen Latin restaurants. But my favorite "Mexican" food is Velveeta microwaved with taco sauce to make nachos, best conmsumed with Tostitos.

Aside from the laptop computer, I think Califoria Onion Dip is the greatest American invention ever.

Edited January 20, 2010 by Busboy (log)

[Toliver]

I love Tater Tots, with ketchup.

Hie thee to the discussion: The Tater Tot Topic

[Beebs]

Got one more shame to add....

Margarine.

I use it on toast & sandwiches. I have no good reason to use margarine - I don't like the taste better than butter, I know it's not really good for you, and I'm not lactose intolerant. I don't even cook with margarine (except sometimes for grilled cheese sandwiches). I am simply cannot be bothered to wait for the butter to soften up to spreadable consistency.

[syoung68]

mmmm. Sonic's Chili Cheese Tots. They are so bad for me. I know with ZERO uncertainty that I will have the worst heartburn, but I do not care.

I can not believe that no one has mentioned pork rinds. This is one of those that I am NOT ashamed to be seen eating, but I am ashamed to be putting them into my body. It happens once a month or so.

There are plenty foods that I know I should not eat, I am a giant Taco Bell fan, but I am not really ashamed. However, we had a themed party a few years back, and everyone had to bring food that they most probably would not eat. Examples included the cat litter cake, easy cheese, and anything with a can of soup in it. I made spam and french fry casserol. While I will probably not ever make it again, I am slightly ashamed to say, not only did I eat it, it was good.

[Aloha Steve]

Every morning we are at home, we drink 100% Kona coffee, not just any old bean, the creme de la creme the Peabody Special Reserve. I buy the whole bean and grind myself. We put a packet of Nestles non-fat, 20 calorie hot chocolate, a few mini marshmallows (around Halloween multi colored left over from candy bag) then top it all of with Coffee Mate.

Edited January 20, 2010 by Aloha Steve (log)

[PopsicleToze]

The Kraft Blue Box is the only thing that shocked me a little bit while reading this thread.

I guess my shame is that I use instant coffee at home most mornings -- but at least it's Community Coffee brand; there is no compromise for that one.

Rhonda