Which implements do you use when you eat?

[Kerala]

In Kerala we use our fingers. Yoghurt, rasam and sambar are mixed with rice and eaten by hand. Payasam is eaten off the leaf by hand, but in recent decades may be served in small bowls and eaten with a spoon.

I sustained a gory injury to my right arm when I was a house officer 35 years ago and the median nerve didn't grow back quite right. Not only do I lack the fine dexterity to eat rice elegantly with my fingers, but I also suffer sensitivity to hot food on my fingertips. Sadly I now eat Indian food in the English manner.

Chopsticks are impossible for me to grasp properly since the accident, so I use them cack-handedly. I just endure the ignominy.

Worst of all, I sometimes eat Indian food with my left hand. I'm sure people think I lost my culture growing up in the UK!

 

[liuzhou]

I'm not usually ambidextrous but can use chopsticks in either hand. My party trick is to use two pairs of chopsticks simultaneously.

 

 

[blue_dolphin]

6 hours ago, Kerala said:

Not only do I lack the fine dexterity to eat rice elegantly with my fingers, but I also suffer sensitivity to hot food on my fingertips. Sadly I now eat Indian food in the English manner.

I have no good excuse for my inability to eat rice elegantly with my fingers except that it’s a skill I never learned. I mastered chopsticks as an adult and there’s no reason I shouldn’t be able to do the same with my own fingers! I need to use the surfaces of my fingertips with greater precision and may need to ask my Indian friends to correct me like a child! 

[liuzhou]

I am inordinately fond of these spoons.

 

 

They're a bit bigger than teaspoons size and sold as watermelon spoons. I use them for ice cream. 

 

 

 

[chromedome]

33 minutes ago, liuzhou said:

I am inordinately fond of these spoons.

 

 

They're a bit bigger than teaspoons size and sold as watermelon spoons. I use them for ice cream. 

 

 

 

I'm tempted to get them for my GF, for the same purpose, but she might interpret that as an editorial comment on how much ice cream she engulfs at a sitting. 

[gulfporter]

I don't think we use knives while eating more than once a month at home. 

 

Our protein of choice is seafood, usually salmon and shrimp.   I sear tuna steaks for soft tacos, but I slice the steak and prepare the tacos in the kitchen.  

 

We love grilled racks of lamb, but I carve into chops in the kitchen and plate.  We gnaw on the grilled chops out of hand (how gauche!).  

 

I grill pork tenderloin but these days they are so skinny, after I rest them, I slice and serve the slices on our plate that are just a one bite deal. 

 

We love chicken.  I often buy rotis chicken and debone and make into a recipe (if you need a knife for a rotis chicken you're buying it at the wrong place ☺️).  I have BBQ chicken and also wings delivered, both of which we eat of of hand (with lots of napkins!).

 

We have pizza at least once a week either delivered, carryout or I bake a Costco frozen Detroit pizza.  No knives needed other than to slice the Detroit pizza before eating.  

 

Other meals at home are pasta, omelets, hashes, soups and stews.  

 

I grill burgers (beef, lamb, Italian sausage) a lot in summer, too.  

 

Our table/steak knives come out for chicken sheet pan dinners and an occasional meal of arrachera (marinated skirt steak).  

Edited Friday at 09:45 PM by gulfporter
grammar (log)

[liuzhou]

Here is a typical set for a Chnese place setting. We have a cup, a rice bowl, chopsticks and a spoon. The small plate is mainly used for discarded bones* etc.

 

 

Incidentally, this set is made from bio-degradable rice husks and is used for food deliveries (although most still use plastic). The chopsticks are bamboo.

 

In restaurants, you are more likely to be given porcelain spoons and plates etc. The chopsticks will be wooden. Restaurants tend to 'rent' their tableware from a service whitch takes them away each night, and cleans and stabilises them, wraps each set in plastic and redelivers in the morning.

 

* Most foods come on the bone in China.  

 

 

Edited yesterday at 01:25 AM by liuzhou (log)

[liuzhou]

7 hours ago, gulfporter said:

I don't think we use knives while eating more than once a month at home. 

 

Nearly all Chinese families never use knives at the dinner table. I seldom do.

 

 

[KennethT]

7 hours ago, liuzhou said:

 

Nearly all Chinese families never use knives at the dinner table. I seldom do.

 

 

As I know you know, but for others here, this is true all over SE Asia.  Unless it's a Western restaurant, I've never seen a knife in a local place anywhere in Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, Vietnam or Thailand.  Vietnam is typically chopsticks, while Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia and Thailand are fork and spoon, unless it's a noodle dish in Thailand which is the only time you'd see chopsticks.  In many parts of Indonesia and Malaysia (and South Indian places in Singapore), fingers are the common implements, but there's always forks/spoons in a container on the table.

[liuzhou]

1 hour ago, KennethT said:

As I know you know, but for others here, this is true all over SE Asia.  Unless it's a Western restaurant, I've never seen a knife in a local place anywhere in Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, Vietnam or Thailand.  Vietnam is typically chopsticks, while Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia and Thailand are fork and spoon, unless it's a noodle dish in Thailand which is the only time you'd see chopsticks.  In many parts of Indonesia and Malaysia (and South Indian places in Singapore), fingers are the common implements, but there's always forks/spoons in a container on the table.

 

Yes. There's a huge taboo about knives at table. They remain strictly in the kitchen.

 

I've seen people visibly uncomfortable in western restaurants in China and elsewhere.

 

 

Edited yesterday at 01:35 PM by liuzhou (log)

[haresfur]

On 8/15/2025 at 3:39 AM, Kerala said:

In Kerala we use our fingers. Yoghurt, rasam and sambar are mixed with rice and eaten by hand. Payasam is eaten off the leaf by hand, but in recent decades may be served in small bowls and eaten with a spoon.

I sustained a gory injury to my right arm when I was a house officer 35 years ago and the median nerve didn't grow back quite right. Not only do I lack the fine dexterity to eat rice elegantly with my fingers, but I also suffer sensitivity to hot food on my fingertips. Sadly I now eat Indian food in the English manner.

Chopsticks are impossible for me to grasp properly since the accident, so I use them cack-handedly. I just endure the ignominy.

Worst of all, I sometimes eat Indian food with my left hand. I'm sure people think I lost my culture growing up in the UK!

 

 

So you mix the other food with the rice rather than using a bit of rice to scoop up the food? Is that a northern vs southern India thing? I could never get the hang of scooping up "curry" etc. with rice but do like to scoop with roti. Or, be a real heathen an use a fork to put the food in a bit of roti to eat. 

 

I can use chopsticks with my right hand if I'm trying to be polite, but I'm left handed and that just works better for me. 

[Kerala]

@haresfur yes, we mix the sloppy bits with the rice. We may or may not have a piece of meat or vegetable in the portion we bring to our mouth. 

 

When we eat rice, we use our fingertips, and the palm remains clean. My grandfather from Tamil Nadu, the state just to the East, would use his whole hand. Other people form balls of rice and gravy before passing food to their lips. The action to form the balls by tossing and rolling the semi-solid amalgam of rice and curry is something we don't see much in the west in any context and is difficult to explain.

 

There is a lot of variation across India and even within Kerala. Chappathi is North Indian but completely normal in Kerala. I've never had naan in Kerala. Parottas in Kerala are not paratha of N India, although similar. With all of these, we'd scoop up the gravy and maybe grab a piece of meat to pop in our mouth. 

 

Licking your fingers after eating - variable acceptability!

 

Naturally, everyone thinks their way is the right way.

 

@haresfur do you hold the roti in your right hand or left when you load it with a fork? Right hand- many Indians would do this if they're eating at a restaurant when abroad. Left hand- no one is judging you; thank you for your custom. I hold the roti in my left hand... I know I'm being judged.

 

Equally, I'm sure the Chinese waiter doesn't give a hoot how cack-handedly I hold my chopsticks!

 

On the other hand, we're all pretty judgemental about how someone holds their knife and fork, aren't we? Are we?

 

[haresfur]

1 hour ago, Kerala said:

@haresfur yes, we mix the sloppy bits with the rice. We may or may not have a piece of meat or vegetable in the portion we bring to our mouth. 

 

When we eat rice, we use our fingertips, and the palm remains clean. My grandfather from Tamil Nadu, the state just to the East, would use his whole hand. Other people form balls of rice and gravy before passing food to their lips. The action to form the balls by tossing and rolling the semi-solid amalgam of rice and curry is something we don't see much in the west in any context and is difficult to explain.

 

There is a lot of variation across India and even within Kerala. Chappathi is North Indian but completely normal in Kerala. I've never had naan in Kerala. Parottas in Kerala are not paratha of N India, although similar. With all of these, we'd scoop up the gravy and maybe grab a piece of meat to pop in our mouth. 

 

Licking your fingers after eating - variable acceptability!

 

Naturally, everyone thinks their way is the right way.

 

@haresfur do you hold the roti in your right hand or left when you load it with a fork? Right hand- many Indians would do this if they're eating at a restaurant when abroad. Left hand- no one is judging you; thank you for your custom. I hold the roti in my left hand... I know I'm being judged.

 

Equally, I'm sure the Chinese waiter doesn't give a hoot how cack-handedly I hold my chopsticks!

 

On the other hand, we're all pretty judgemental about how someone holds their knife and fork, aren't we? Are we?

 

 

I hold the roti in my right hand and use the fork with my left. I was brought up with the "fork stays in the left hand" school of eating. So it all makes sense and I assume it doesn't offend anyone. 

 

In a restaurant, I will usually order naan or garlic naan. I like the wholemeal chapatis but would have to make them myself. At home I get frozen roti from Aldi and use them for almost anything that calls for flat bread except Mexican, especially kabab since the bread at my local shop is pretty ordinary. We just get a meat pack and eat it with roti like it is Indian.

 

I use my fork concave side up. Scooping onto the back of the fork baffles me. I hold my knife overhand and the English hold from below grip seems odd.

[Katie Meadow]

I love to watch when people are dexterous and elegant eating with fingers. I never learned that, so I don't try. I'm just a white Jewish old lady and did not grow up with South Asian or Ethiopian parents. Without untensils I eat the following: tacos,

sandwiches, chicken wings and pizza if it usually pizza. Also I have a bad habit of grabbing the pope's nostrils off a hot roasted chicken. Nothing to brag about there.

[Kerala]

6 hours ago, haresfur said:

I use my fork concave side up. Scooping onto the back of the fork baffles me. I hold my knife overhand and the English hold from below grip seems odd.

I'm not really posh, so I use the fork concave side up for peas and baked beans. If I'm in posh company I would most definitely use concave side up to stay true to my working class roots. Welcome to the British class system.

The overhand grip on the knife is the generally accepted technique in the United Kingdom. The "English hold from below grip" sounds like a pen grip? It's not standard in the UK but people do use it. I would sneer at this grip, and acknowledge my horrible bourgeois programming. While continuing to use my fork upside down.

 

[Kerala]

5 hours ago, Katie Meadow said:

Also I have a bad habit of grabbing the pope's nostrils off a hot roasted chicken.

I've never heard it called the Pope's nostrils, only the parson's nose. You learn something every day!

[chromedome]

8 hours ago, haresfur said:

 

I hold the roti in my right hand and use the fork with my left. I was brought up with the "fork stays in the left hand" school of eating. So it all makes sense and I assume it doesn't offend anyone. 

 

You've reminded me of an episode of (forgive me!) Gilligan's Island, in which the castaways discover a Tarzan-ish wild man living on the island. Harvard-educated millionaire Thurston Howell III (Jim Backus) believes setting out a meal and silverware will establish whether, in childhood, this ape-man was raised by Brits or Americans. Brits, he explains to his wife, hold the fork in their left hand, Americans in their right. 

The wild man looks back and forth at the fork and knife, than grabs the food with both hands and chews on it savagely, grunting and growling. "Good heavens!" exclaims Howell. "A Yale man!"

[Katie Meadow]

12 hours ago, Katie Meadow said:

I love to watch when people are dexterous and elegant eating with fingers. I never learned that, so I don't try. I'm just a white Jewish old lady and did not grow up with South Asian or Ethiopian parents. Without untensils I eat the following: tacos,

sandwiches, chicken wings and pizza if it usually pizza. Also I have a bad habit of grabbing the pope's nostrils off a hot roasted chicken. Nothing to brag about there.

I am embarrassed to have made several typos. I do use a knife and fork for pizza that is really floppy. I prefer a nice thin crusty dough. Pope's nostrils? I can't believe i actually wrote that. Of course I meant his nose. Did I do that unconsciously?Hard to believe. Has AI infected eG? Auto-correct seems unlikely. Must be drug related, or else pure brilliance. Either way it's creepy.