9 phrases to ban from restaurant menus

[David A. Goldfarb]

Kentucky Grilled Chicken, that's just wrong.

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Or PFK, which you can find in Quebec--"Poulet frit Kentucky."

[MaxH]

...that's just wrong.

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Or PFK, which you can find in Quebec--"Poulet frit Kentucky."

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What is wrong with that, David? I'm not a native francophone, but it looks like a faithful translation.

Closer than (for instance) the US "French fried potatoes" for pommes frites, or "Black Forest cake" for Schwarzwälder Kirchtorte -- there are many other examples. (Not that those two are especially bad translations either.)

[David A. Goldfarb]

...that's just wrong.

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Or PFK, which you can find in Quebec--"Poulet frit Kentucky."

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What is wrong with that, David? I'm not a native francophone, but it looks like a faithful translation.

It is a faithful translation, and I'm generally opposed to the imperialism of the English language, but it seems a bit perverse to translate a corporate name that as far as I know isn't translated anywhere else. For instance, here's a KFC in Paris--

http://maps.google.com/maps?oe=utf-8&clien...2,340.16,,0,5.4

Just to clarify, this isn't just what they call the product on the menu, but it's the actual name of the restaurant--"PFK"--only in Quebec.

Out of curiosity, I looked up various KFC websites and it's "KFC" in India, and "Rostik's" in Russia, though it still has the KFC logo in the Latin alphabet. Here's KFC in China--

http://www.thebeijingguide.com/deutsche/modern/index.html

Edited July 8, 2009 by David A. Goldfarb (log)

[MaxH]

It is a faithful translation, ... but it seems a bit perverse to translate a corporate name

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Gotcha. Not just a phrase but a brand. In the same way that other established names like Bayerische Motoren Werke, or Svenska Aeroplan AktieBolaget, aren't normally translated either. (And a few names not only aren't translated, but also aren't understood -- the notorious Glavnoye Upravleniye LAGerey for instance -- one of many GU bureaucracies of its time and place.)

But maybe for some KFC markets (Quebec, Russia) a local name sells better. That will rule.

[paulraphael]

Mony Python was skewering food descriptions decades ago. This is for "Crunchy Frog" :

"We use only the finest baby frogs, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in the finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope, and lovingly frosted with glucose."

[MikeHartnett]

I'm particularly bothered by "air" on a menu, eg "rosemary air." I don't have an issue with the concept. I just find it a little too cutesy, and it comes off a bit pretentious.

Also, when restaurants advertise that their chicken is all white meat, as if that's a good thing. Boo to dark meat non-eaters!

[TimmDavis]

I'm particularly bothered by "air" on a menu, eg "rosemary air."  I don't have an issue with the concept.  I just find it a little too cutesy, and it comes off a bit pretentious.

Also, when restaurants advertise that their chicken is all white meat, as if that's a good thing.  Boo to dark meat non-eaters!

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It's either that or "foam", and personally I think air works a lot better. Too many other things come to mind when you say 'Foam" as opposed to 'air'.

[FauxPas]

It is a faithful translation, and I'm generally opposed to the imperialism of the English language, but it seems a bit perverse to translate a corporate name that as far as I know isn't translated anywhere else. 

With regard to the KFC signage, businesses in Québec really don't have any choice - due to the provincial language laws. At one time, it was illegal to have English in a business sign at all. Later, English was permitted but the French version had to be twice the size of the English. Not all Canadians (or even Québécois) agree with this aspect of the language laws. If interested, here is a little bit of background reading:

http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/bill101/

I thought the use of "fresh frozen" arose to reflect quick freezing very soon after harvest/capture/slaughter.

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I'm more familiar with the term "flash frozen" used to emphasize that the fish has been quickly frozen ASAP after being hauled in. I guess "fresh frozen" might mean the same thing, but it just sounds odd to me!

Edited July 8, 2009 by FauxPas (log)

[Busboy]

I'm particularly bothered by "air" on a menu, eg "rosemary air."  I don't have an issue with the concept.  I just find it a little too cutesy, and it comes off a bit pretentious.

Also, when restaurants advertise that their chicken is all white meat, as if that's a good thing.  Boo to dark meat non-eaters!

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It's either that or "foam", and personally I think air works a lot better. Too many other things come to mind when you say 'Foam" as opposed to 'air'.

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Although I have only modest experience with them, it is my belief that "foams" and "airs" are considered by the cognoscenti to be separate and distinct classifications and that chefs like Ferrand Adria would rather smother themselves in agar agar than use "foam" when they meant "air" and vice-versa.

"Culinary foam was created by Ferran Adria and there he uses juices and savory essences along with agar and a canister like the one you'd use to squirt out whipped cream. Many chefs now, like Chef Gregg Sessler over at Cava, just use one of those little handheld whippers to foam up juices. He makes a lighter than foam version, "air" in his olive air, which goes with a lamb dish. It's pure flavor. "

[Florida]

"sushi-grade fish"

1) sushi is seasoned rice. It should be "sashimi-grade fish," except for the fact that

2) there exist no such fish grading standards when it comes to either sushi or sashimi.

[Florida]

I'm particularly bothered by "air" on a menu, eg "rosemary air."  I don't have an issue with the concept.  I just find it a little too cutesy, and it comes off a bit pretentious.

Also, when restaurants advertise that their chicken is all white meat, as if that's a good thing.  Boo to dark meat non-eaters!

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It's either that or "foam", and personally I think air works a lot better. Too many other things come to mind when you say 'Foam" as opposed to 'air'.

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Although I have only modest experience with them, it is my belief that "foams" and "airs" are considered by the cognoscenti to be separate and distinct classifications and that chefs like Ferrand Adria would rather smother themselves in agar agar than use "foam" when they meant "air" and vice-versa.

"Culinary foam was created by Ferran Adria and there he uses juices and savory essences along with agar and a canister like the one you'd use to squirt out whipped cream. Many chefs now, like Chef Gregg Sessler over at Cava, just use one of those little handheld whippers to foam up juices. He makes a lighter than foam version, "air" in his olive air, which goes with a lamb dish. It's pure flavor. "

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Alinea has a dish where the plate is litterally placed onto a pillow of scented air. The wieght of the plate pushes out the scented air as you eat the dish.

To me, this would be quite distinct from "foam," which is both tangible and visible.

[Busboy]

Here it is -- in the words of the maestro himself (via the New York Times Magazine). Airs are to foams as an iMac is to a TRS-80.

The other starring concept to make its debut this season is something Adrià calls ''air.'' I had encountered air earlier, on my previous visit to El Bulli, in September of last year. At that time, I talked with Adrià about some of his more celebrated and influential creations, including ''foam,'' in which he aerates sauces with a nitrous-oxide siphon that is ordinarily used to whip cream, and ''warm gelatin,'' in which he adds a seaweed powder called agar to stabilize beef gelatin without chilling it. ''April 14, 1994, was the day of the first foam,'' he said last September. ''Hot jellies date from June 20, 1998.'' His dark restless eyes looked tired, as if oppressed by the weight of all this history and the responsibility of maintaining his position as the world's most creative chef. Then he smiled. ''Another day is Sept. 18, 2002,'' he said. I looked at him quizzically; that was just two days before. ''Foams are out -- for us,'' he said. ''I have created something

five times lighter than the foams. The new texture that I create is air. In the bathroom there is the bath foam. This is the same texture.''A few more questions and his discretion dissipated.

'You will be the first journalist to see it,'' he said. He asked Castro to make preparations in the kitchen. ''It is only done with the product, nothing else,'' he explained. ''For example, the carrot is only carrot juice, nothing else.'' When Castro was ready, we went into the kitchen. Like a magician, Adrià had me taste a bowl of celery juice to verify that it contained nothing else. Then he applied an electric mixer. Within a minute, the liquid had turned into bubble bath. He brought it out onto the patio. He beamed happily, his cares temporarily evaporated. I couldn't decide whether he looked more like a father whose child had uttered a first word or a little boy who finds a bicycle under the Christmas tree. In my mouth, the new ''air'' lacked almost all substance, but embodied the essence of celery.

Edited July 8, 2009 by Busboy (log)

[MikeHartnett]

Alinea has a dish where the plate is litterally placed onto a pillow of scented air. The wieght of the plate pushes out the scented air as you eat the dish.

To me, this would be quite distinct from "foam," which is both tangible and visible.

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I guess I wasn't aware of Adria's version of "air," but the Alinea version is what I was referring to. Not a foam at all. Nothing is actually eaten; it's a scent that adds to a dish. The concept is solid, and it adds to the dish in a way similar to a cocktail garnish. I think I'd just prefer "scent of rosemary" or something in that vein. "Air" just rubs me the wrong way.

[jesteinf]

I was just at el Bulli a couple of weeks ago and one of the things we ate was parmesan frozen air. Here's a picture of the air with dried muesli sprinkled on top:

Very different than foam. Whereas I think of foam as really just a sauce with a lot of air in it, the "air" at el Bulli was much different. It was very cold a dissipated in my mouth as soon as I put it in, leaving really only the flavor of the parmesan. That's probably not the best description, but probably the best I can do.

[MaxH]

These foams and airs -- I have experience with various foam types -- are certainly real, legitimate, creative cooking.

But what a set-up for abuse, corruption, parody! I've seen food trends arrive that had substance, but whose language became hip, and then inevitably used at whim, detached from the substance of the idea. (Come to think of it, that's not limited to food.) I can imagine an extreme, degenerate form of "air" where some future pretentious pundit asserts that the aroma is "virtual" or "allegorical" and must be substantiated in the mind. And patrons line up with testimonials. (As they do today for mystical gadgets, fanciful herbal cures that don't work, etc., which rake in millions of dollars and discredit legitimate ones.)

Until some child, too simple for fashionable fatuities, speaks the truth and declares "it's only hot air."

[pastrygirl]

Alinea has a dish where the plate is litterally placed onto a pillow of scented air. The wieght of the plate pushes out the scented air as you eat the dish.

To me, this would be quite distinct from "foam," which is both tangible and visible.

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I guess I wasn't aware of Adria's version of "air," but the Alinea version is what I was referring to. Not a foam at all. Nothing is actually eaten; it's a scent that adds to a dish. The concept is solid, and it adds to the dish in a way similar to a cocktail garnish. I think I'd just prefer "scent of rosemary" or something in that vein. "Air" just rubs me the wrong way.

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In this case - Alinea air pillow - scented seems to be the appropriate word. But I would ban 'scented' from just about every other place it is used. For example, vanilla scented panna cotta that may have been infused with vanilla beans but does not noticeably smell of vanilla. Lemon scented shortbread, etc. BAH!

[Rob Babcock]

Good info, Tsulli 1. That's the problem- that's a family of fish. "Pike Perch" on a menu doesn't tell you which one you'll get! Thanks for the link.

[McDuff]

Heh.  I was waiting for the first post to suggest replacing one incorrect description with an equally incorrect one.

I'd call that "frying" rather than "pan roasting." 

"Roasting" is cooking (unenclosed and dry) using directional radient heat.  Whatever "pan roasting" is, it would have to be starting something in a pan and then keeping the food in that same pan while roasting it.  This would usually be an oven, although there is some question in my mind as to whether something cooked in an enclosed oven can be considered "roasted" rather than "baked."

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meats are roasted, vegetables can be roasted. breads and cakes are baked.

[MikeHartnett]

"Roasting" is cooking (unenclosed and dry) using directional radient heat.  Whatever "pan roasting" is, it would have to be starting something in a pan and then keeping the food in that same pan while roasting it.  This would usually be an oven, although there is some question in my mind as to whether something cooked in an enclosed oven can be considered "roasted" rather than "baked."

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Do you refer to a roasted chicken as a baked chicken?

[moosnsqrl]

the "air" at el Bulli was much different.

One might say rarified

[gfweb]

"done to perfection"

"decadent" "sinful" "indulgent" "sensuous" "mouthwatering" and all other BS descriptions.

[Just Jim]

A local restaurant used to offer Huevos Rancheros a la Mexicana.

Another used to have this on their sign board:

"Mexican American Breakfasts-Swedish Pancakes".

My F&B Manager would refer to any sliced roast beef in a pan as "Baron of Beef", selling it that way on banquets.

A brand new menu item referred to as "our popular".

Semi-boneless is a term that needs to go away.

It either has a bone or it doesn't.

Or can we use that in other areas of life?

Semi-pregnant?

[steverino]

"Lovingly Prepared" - ummm ... yeah.

"Award Winning" - even better with "Our Own" in front of it. If it's award winning, tell me what award and where.

"Hand Selected" - I recently saw this on a chain restaurant mailer for fish, of all things. Yeah - how bout "lovingly" hand selected from the lowboy by the slammed line cook .

"Perfectly Seasoned" - don't even get me started. And it's cousin "Grilled to Perfection". Grrrr...

"Fried to a Golden Crisp" - or somesuch. Brilliant.

"Tuscan" or "Toscani" - Give me a BIG fucking break! Gawd, how pretentious!

"Insalada Caprese" - Perfectly legitimate. For maybe two months of the year. Your "vine ripened" tomatoes that taste like unripe pumpkin don't fit here.

"Cherry Wood" - As a former custom furniture maker, I had to include this. "Can you make my desk out of Cherry Wood?" Shaking, with heart palpitations: "Are you sure you wouldn't like it to be "Mahogany Wood" or "Maple Wood" or "Oak Wood" or "Hickory Wood" or "Pine Wood" or

whoa. got a little woozy there.

Steve

[DanM]

Writing that your deserts, baked goods, etc... are baked fresh. This is often a cop out for frozen crap trucked in from a factory instead of taking the time to make it yourself. Even worse is when they claim something is made fresh in house when it is CLEARLY came off the back of a freezer truck.

Dan

[Andrew Fenton]

I nominate restaurants that bill themselves as "regional", as in "regional Italian." This seems to be a meaningless phrase. It might mean that the restaurant specializes in the cuisine of a particular region, in which case they'd be better off, and more accurate, referring to themselves as "Tuscan" or "Emilian" or "Roman" or whatever. Or (as seems more often to be the case) it means that they feature dishes from a number of regions. In that case, "regional" just means "Italian."

In practice, "regional" seems to be code for "not Italian-American" (or in another context, "Americanized Chinese".) But it's a poor way of expressing that idea.