America's Food Neurosis

[annecros]

"Southern Baptist Guilt" --        First time I visited my husband's family, I was amazed at how elaborate the table settings, how his mother plated everything on lettuce leaves, how much time they spent ironing linens (again) and running around to get it all ready at a certain time, and then prayed over it for what seemed like 15 minutes ... but no one, NO ONE, ate much.  They discussed it a lot, and talked about it, and cut it into tiny bites so their mouths didn't open far, and pushed it around their plate.  People who do eat are considered "gluttonous" and "low class" and -- the ultimate jab -- "Yankee" by them! 

My family ... whew, that's a different story and equally weird.  Out of this, I've managed to make my sons un-loony about food. 

I personally would only feel guilty about eating, if I was tucking into a third helping of foie gras or steak or nice roasted chicken, with a tableful of starving kids sitting right there.  Starving adults can fend for themselves.

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That's a great story, FFB! As a fellow Yankee, I'm proud to be gluttonous...though my very Yankee grandparents have always frowned on gluttony. Hmmmm...

As to your second point about foie gras/starving children induced guilt: I agree.

However, I do think it's reasonable for someone whose health is in jeopardy to feel a little guilty about not taking good care of themselves, food-wise. Sort of like my mom, who always felt guilty about smoking (Until she quit - good work, Mom!) because it might have meant that she would be around and with us for a shorter period of time. But that's a guilt that has a genuine cause, rather than one that's manufactured just to make you feel bad about yourself or keep you "in line."

But it doesn't follow, by any means, that folks who need to watch what they eat (which, really, is all of us, if to varying extents) can't still enjoy their food.

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Now that is very interesting. I always thoiught of yankees as in the stereotypical, frugal, humble, New England Yankee. Georgia was founded as a penal colony.

I have just gotten used to yankees dissing me for fat in my vegetables and that extra stick of butter. Use it or it'll go bad, way of thinking. God forbid the mess at a BBQ.

I thought of the New England Yankee as the canning, preserving, drying, squash eating, frugal woman dressed in black preparing boiled dinners. True puritans, proud of it as well, and well they should be. Waste is dispicable.

Perhaps this southern family was out to make a good impression on the yankee that came to visit? We can put on airs, and compete with the most puritanical company we keep. Even if we have to raid the fridge later.

[Megan Blocker]

Now that is very interesting. I always thoiught of yankees as in the stereotypical, frugal, humble, New England Yankee. Georgia was founded as a penal colony.

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As have I, Anne...I think there was an interesting crossover somewhere in the Baby Boomer generation. My mom and her friends and siblings have always been very into food and comfort...there's a certain emphasis on frugality and economy, certainly, but nothing like what my grandparents have been like.

Edited April 21, 2006 by Megan Blocker (log)

[Blanche Davidian]

The thing I hate most about American food culture is the freakin' weird diets everybody is going on and off. Deciding where to go out to eat is a pain. Having a dinner party involves cooking 3 separate menus. And the worst of it all is listening to somebody obsess about points/the glycemic index/whether they can have something. I know dieting is hard work and you need a lot of support, but I do NOT want to hear what you had for lunch and how many points it was.

I think it detracts attention from the REAL problem, which is lack of exercise.

[Edit: spelling]

Edited April 21, 2006 by Blanche Davidian (log)

[Rebecca263]

Just want you all to know, I'm sitting here reading my eGullet today, I just finished a pear, 2 pieces of some chocolate mousse cake (with a dark chocolate icing, how did they do that? It's WONDERFUL frozen), and a 1/4 of a home made basil tomato pizza from last night, and I washed it down with a nice couple of glasses of KFP Coca Cola. Now I'm off to do a little house prep for the upcoming visit of one of my boys next week, and I'm not in the least bit repentant or feeling guilty! I hope that makes you all feel better, as I believe that I'm a fairly average girl of middle age, and it is just by some odd chance that the poll taker missed me. I must have been busy, getting busy, or eating.

Now, my sister, she is always on a diet, she makes her hubby beg for 'dates', and her kids and life are wonders of structured activities. SHE feels guilt. I just feel. They must polled her by accident.

[annecros]

Amazing. All this guilt and angst and diet obsessiveness, yet aren't we supposed to be the world leaders in obesity? Even among our poor?

Somebody is eating.

[FabulousFoodBabe]

Perhaps this southern family was out to make a good impression on the yankee that came to visit? We can put on airs, and compete with the most puritanical company we keep. Even if we have to raid the fridge later.

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OMG, that is what I call optimistic! I've been married to him for over 20 years and things have not changed a bit. Geez, what does that say for such a culture, if setting a fancy table and cooking for an army, just so you can refuse to touch much of it, is how you think you'll impress others? Scarlett O'Hara ate before barbecues so she could show what a lady she is by not eating in front of others; I hope we've come far since then.

Anyway, back to the main thread. I refuse to call food sinful. I also refuse to call obese people "stricken by disease," or lazy or sloppy. Guilt is self-induced and completely pointless.

I think Americans eat more and enjoy it less because they don't think about it too much and claims of "just no time at all" are silly. You don't have to sit down to a long "family dinner" to pay attention to what you're eating. You don't have to cook garbage to do a meal in 45 minutes. Food should not be punishment; the term "making healthy food choices" grates on my nerves.

[Jensen]

the term "making healthy food choices" grates on my nerves.

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What bothers you about it?

[ingridsf]

I think a lot of what's called neurosis is an anxiety-related reaction to so many low-level choices to be made (who ISN'T sometimes overwhelmed in a grocery store?) combined with a sense that we don't have enough meaningful control over our bigger food issues (contradictory medical findings, pollution, and such). It's a sign of stress.

***

Have to add reference to Elaine on Seinfeld: "I didn't yadada over the best part of the date. I mentioned the lobster bisque." (paraphrasing)

[My Confusing Horoscope]

It's a sign of emotional decay, an inability to prioritize and and lack of intellectual discipline -- another sign of the apocalypse, another indication of Western Civilization's decline, another brick in the wall.

We were just talking like this on one of the music discussion boards I frequent (troll?). Never mind which genre we were disparaging. Great line!

[ingridsf]

It's a sign of emotional decay, an inability to prioritize and and lack of intellectual discipline -- another sign of the apocalypse, another indication of Western Civilization's decline, another brick in the wall.

We were just talking like this on one of the music discussion boards I frequent (troll?). Never mind which genre we were disparaging. Great line!

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Hee --- this all may be true but I can easily imagine the same dire State of the Culture judgement having been uttered by parents when The Wall ("another brick in the wall") was released.

Every generation has its neuroses, food-focused and otherwise. And I believe the pre-Socratic Greeks thought the world was going to hell (Hades?) in their time.

I think our current neuroses are unique to us, though, and that they're more about surfeit than scarcity as has been more common previously.

Just not sure we're MORE neurotic now about food than in the past.

[Megan Blocker]

Food should not be punishment...

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Amen.

[srhcb]

Too Much Food!

No other people in History, or plant or animal before that, have ever been able to say that for an extended period.

If this makes you neurotic or guilty , you should seek professional help.

SB (ain't complainin')

[jsolomon]

If you ask Michael Pollan (author of The Omnivore's Dilemma), it's a problem of too much corn...

[FabulousFoodBabe]

the term "making healthy food choices" grates on my nerves.

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What bothers you about it?

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There are no unhealthy foods, just unhealthy eating habits.

(Of course, this is not the case for people who are allergic, have some medical condition, etc.)

[Chris Amirault]

FFB, I think that "healthy" modifies "choices," not "food" in that phrase.

[rancho_gordo]

Naturally, my interpretation of the news goes back to the ingredients. We have more food, but it's crappy and unsatisfying so we eat too much to find some kind of pleasure and end up being obese.

We've figured out how to yield 10 times the amount of tomatoes (for which we pay the grower $30 per ton) and yet they taste horrible. Add some corn syrup and chemical flavors and call it tomato sauce. Rubber cheese, cardboard dough, lots of salt and you've got a pizza. It's almost what we remember as pizza and if I eat one more slice, I might get the food buzz I'm craving. Maybe not but I blinked and consumed 5,000 calories and I'm still unhappy. And I need a nap.

But if the ingredients were good, we'd probably eat less because we'd be satisfied. Good wheat, real tomato, simple cheese, drizzle of olive oil....I feel like dancing, not watching Food TV to learn how to make semi-homemade pizza that I'm too busy to try.

[Busboy]

the term "making healthy food choices" grates on my nerves.

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What bothers you about it?

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There are no unhealthy foods, just unhealthy eating habits.

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I'm not persuaded that Twinkies are not unhealthy foods, in a deep and profound fashion but I dislike the phrase as well, as it somehow seems to take the hint of moralism that I like to see in the public discourse, out of it.

[ghostrider]

Now that is very interesting. I always thoiught of yankees as in the stereotypical, frugal, humble, New England Yankee. Georgia was founded as a penal colony.

I have just gotten used to yankees dissing me for fat in my vegetables and that extra stick of butter. Use it or it'll go bad, way of thinking. God forbid the mess at a BBQ.

I thought of the New England Yankee as the canning, preserving, drying, squash eating, frugal woman dressed in black preparing boiled dinners. True puritans, proud of it as well, and well they should be. Waste is dispicable.

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Hmm......

Although I grew up in the midwest, my parents admired Yankee frugality, &, for the most part, took it to levels undreamt of in cold stony New England.

But curiously, part of that frugality translated into growing one's own vegetables, & it didn't forbid enjoying the taste of food. The result was that, for much of the year, we ate better than our neighbors.

Of course, as an impressionable kid, I was constantly torn between enjoying the taste of corn that had been picked minutes before going into the pot, and wanting to eat TV dinners out of shiny compartmentalized aluminum trays like everyone else.

Food-related neuroses take many forms & are hard to escape, though with a bit of luck & intelligence, we may outgrow them.

[FabulousFoodBabe]

Hmm......

Although I grew up in the midwest, my parents admired Yankee frugality, &, for the most part, took it to levels undreamt of in cold stony New England.

But curiously, part of that frugality translated into growing one's own vegetables, & it didn't forbid enjoying the taste of food.  The result was that, for much of the year, we ate better than our neighbors.

Of course, as an impressionable kid, I was constantly torn between enjoying the taste  of corn that had been picked minutes before going  into the pot, and wanting to eat TV dinners out of shiny compartmentalized aluminum trays like everyone else.

Food-related neuroses take many forms & are hard to escape, though with a bit of luck & intelligence, we may outgrow them.

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Heh. I, too, grew up in the Midwest and was -- gasp! -- the child of a nearly working class, immigrant family. The way Yankee was used was "anyone not from the Deep South."

The Italian side of my family used food as comfort, celebration, and to show love -- if we didn't eat until we hurt, my Italian grandmother would gnash her teeth and wail that she didn't blame us at all, because she was a lousy cook. The German side used food as punishment, incentive, and if we weren't hungry, well, it was because we were trying to be rebellious, so we had to eat anyway. (The vain girl in me is trying hard NOT to point out that, no, I really don't weigh 400 pounds. .... oopsie! )

It's amazing with all this, that my own sons aren't totally nuts when it comes to food.

And Busboy, I maybe agree with you about Cool-Whip and Twinkies and Margarines, none of which see the light (or darkness) of Casa Foodbabe. It's just that "healthy choices" seem to go along with denial, pissiness, and low-fat cheeses.

[Rebecca263]

Gosh, a Twinkie. Nope, can't do it, we're having fresh pineapple tonight, or the poor fruit will get tossed, it's so ripe! Maybe tomorrow, if I feel strong enough to handle the corn syrup kick!

[purplewiz]

When I was growing up, everything that I was taught was healthy tasted terrible.

Everything that tasted good, that I wanted to eat, I was taught was unhealthy.

Is it any surprise that we're neurotic - caught between food we were taught we should eat but don't want to, and stuff we want to eat which we were taught we shouldn't eat.

The amazing thing is that we're not MORE neurotic. Stuff like that will drive anyone crazy.

And not everyone moves on to understand that this is a false dichotomy.

Marcia.

[MarketStEl]

Eating does seem to become an increasingly guilty pleasure in our culture.  More and more kids are being put on diets, more people are starving themselves to look like the trash that passes for celebrities these days.  10 years ago, anorexia was mostly a problem among young white females - now, the rate of anorexia among African-American females has doubled, and it is also increasing significantly with males.  I see it all the time in the gay community - our obsession with body image can get to be ridiculous. 

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Sign me up for the next Gut Pride demonstration!

And as for black women, well, I guess they no longer agree with Sir Mix-a-Lot:

You may drive in your Honda

playin' workout tapes by Fonda

But Fonda ain't got no motor in the back of her Honda

My anaconda

don't want none

unless you got buns hon!

--From "Baby Got Back"

[Feedbag]

The comment upthread, something about eating too much crappy food

to try desperately to be satisfied, as opposed to eating a small amount

of really good food doing a better job of that makes sense. People

don't savor. Eating while rushed or watching TV, next thing you know,

you don't remember what you ate let alone whether you enjoyed it.

So you have another piece of cake looking for satisfaction.

I also think there's something to be said for the theory that food is the

new entertainment. Everything's so expensive now we can't take vacations

or even go to the movies, so we indulge in Haagen-Daz to make up for it.

And with so much bad news in the world, food is definitely comforting.

Problem is, more bad news requires more food, next thing you know

you're fat, but not really comforted in the long run. In fact, more anxious

because you're fat, and news reports keep telling you you're gonna croak

if you're fat, let alone be shunned by society. All simplistic, yes, but I bet there's

a bit of truth to it.

Also, if an organic salad cost the same as a Whopper, I bet more people would

opt for the healthier choice. Why does healthy have to cost more? All those

cheap burgers are driving up the cost of health care in the long run to treat

those blocked arteries.

There should be no such thing as a diet. Everybody knows what's right and wrong

to eat, there's no secret or magic solution to weight loss. Moderation is key.

[jsolomon]

Moderation is key.

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Well, moderation, and regular outings with the Hash House Harriers.

[mizducky]

Heh. While I celebrate those here who are stoutly professing their love of food and freedom from guilt over that love, I would like to gently point out, as was already pointed out upthread aways, that this may simply mean that, according to this poll at any rate, you are part of a minority in the US as opposed to the norm. Rejoice--you beat the averages.

Admittedly, I only have equally anecdotal evidence to offer in this thread, but based on that anecdotal evidence I am convinced that guilt and denial over the quality and quantity of food consumed is still very much alive and well in this country. It sure as hell played havoc with my head for many years. And I'm still picking psychological shrapnel out of my psyche over all the mixed messages my parents and peers laid on me over the enjoyment of food.

This does not mean it isn't possible to eat healthily and enjoy it. It simply means that a whole bunch of people in this country apparently haven't the slightest clue how to do that. I sure didn't, until I finally took my brain back from the cultural dieting mentality and started trying to figure things out for myself.

Another point of clarification: the existence of this cultural guilt does not contradict the suggestion from national obesity figures that people are still eating like crazy despite that guilt. I can testify from personal past experience that guilt is a very protean behavior-motivator here (as in many other spheres). Unexamined guilt can spin your brain in such a way that you decide to propitiate the evil food-guilt god by engaging in the most self-destructive dieting behaviors, everything from fad diets to out-and-out bulimia (thank goddess I never got tempted that far). Guilt can also send you into a denial state in which you "sneak" the most ridiculously unhealthy quantities and qualitites of food, only to awake the next day feeling even shittier about yourself than you did before.

There's also the real fun version of denial that I engaged in for many years, in which I consciously declared myself on strike against anything even vaguely resembling a "diet", and maintained I felt no guilt at all about my liberal and gleeful food consumption ... which stance was belied by my constant low-level depression over how my food consumption was impacting my ever-expanding figure and ever-shrinking health, a guilt-fueled depression that I steadfastly refused to acknowledge or address.

(Not to stray too far off-topic, but a similar function does hold sway in that other realm of guilt-inspiring pleasurable behaviors, that of sex. Guilt over sex, depending on how it spins in an individual brain, can produce behaviors varying all the way from revulsion and celibacy to reactive promiscuity. And yes, people do conceive babies even despite massive sex guilt--and boy, do those folks lay some super-mixed messages on their kids about the processes that produced them. Yes, it's a paradox, but no, it's not a contradiction.)

Regardless of any design problems with the study cited at the beginning of this thread, IMO the phenomenon it's trying to get at is very, very real. Yes, there are individuals who do have their head on right about behaving sanely around food and enjoying it, but they are far outnumbered by the legions of people for whom this very natural and necessary life-function has become fraught with psychological pitfalls. I know, because I am an escapee from that unhappy state. You may find this guilt-ridden mindset incomprehensible and alien--be glad that you do, it means you were lucky enough to miss that bit of social programming! But that doesn't make the existence of that programming, and its baleful effects on many other people's heads, any less real.

Edited April 25, 2006 by mizducky (log)