What is the worst dish you ever had?

[popover]

The kind that is so horrible you need to order something else or hide it in a plant in the corner? Where was it?

I hate to say it was my mother's spagetti from years ago. She would boil the spagetti for about 20 minutes and have a phone conversation while turned off the stove and it sat there. After some time she would drain it and put half a stick of very bitter margarine and plain tomato sauce in a can. As a result a lot of plants died in our house.

[BeefCheeks]

Two Thanksgivings ago, my partner and I traveled to Virginia for the holiday, which we were spending at the home of my cousin. While she is a wonderful, talented woman with a heart of gold, she is quite possibly the worst cook I have ever encountered.

We arrived on Wednesday night to find that my cousin had made "a chicken soup" the night before; according to her own mother's instructions, she pulled the "soup chicken" off the bone, hacked it, stuck it in a freezer bag, and froze it. For one night. Upon our arrival, she removed the chicken from the freezer, put it on a small platter, and microwaved it for 10 minutes (presumably to defrost it), after which she removed it and poured 4 cups of water on it. She put it back into the microwave and continued to cook (on high) for a few minutes (to "make a gravy"). As a side dish, she prepared steamed asparagus with "quick hollandaise" --a recipe she'd found in the New JofC. Deciding she had less time than she thought, she put the stalks in an oval baker, added the quick hollandaise mixture to them, covered them with saran, and microwaved them. The result? Asparagus with scrambled eggs, accompanied by Balsa Wood Chicken.

Did you mean at home, or in a restaurant?

Edited October 8, 2005 by BeefCheeks (log)

[Susan in FL]

I have a hard time when I go to someones's home for dinner and they have Waldorf Salad or some sort of Jello salad. I know that doesn't set well with lots of eG people here who take pride in such creations, but I just can't eat it... and would have to resort to faking it somehow if it were served to me and I couldn't politely decline. That's about the only food I can think of that I can't stomach, and it's what comes to mind when I'm asked about the worst dish I've ever had.

[petite tête de chou]

The kind that is so horrible you need to order something else or hide it in a plant in the corner?    Where was it?

I hate to say it was my mother's spagetti from years ago.    She would boil the spagetti for about 20 minutes and have a phone conversation while turned off the stove and it sat there.  After some time she would drain it and put half a stick of very bitter margarine and plain tomato sauce in a can.  As a result a lot of plants died in our house.

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Some very funny stories here...click

[srhcb]

okra and blubber

SB

[dougery]

In 1976 I was on the bullet train in Japan and had an onion pizza that was by far the worst "dish" (if one would call it that) I have ever had. It had a crust that made corrugated cardboard seem appetizing, flavor... well... let's just say, what in the heck do you need flavor for!?

As for folks who might think that the flavors and textures were a result of cultural differences I offer you this, after ordering the "dish" many of the locals offered me pitiful looks and comments reflecting amazment that I was brave enough to order this "dish"...

5 minutes after finishing the "dish" (My mother made me eat the entire thing due to my pleading for pizza) my immune system ejected this foreign body from me into it's proper place... the toilet.

Although I've seen many pizza's in Japan that I'm sure would be considered world class, I still can't pony up enough bravery to try another pizza in Japan.

[Chris Amirault]

okra and blubber

SB 

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Separately? If together, please share the recipe....

[Rebecca263]

A few years ago my mostly erudite boyfriend of 20 plus years decided that kiddle and I MUST be exposed to every food he deemed "normal' to an American family. Thus, she and/or I have now eaten in many American chains that I never attempted as a child or young adult (Burger King!), and I have eaten some branded foodstuffs and casseroles made with weird toppings which my family never had.

The macaroni casserole made with Velveeta was pretty good (kiddle says "mmmm, Velveeta").... the grill plate made with Spam was the single most AWFUL thing I have ever attempted... if he had forced me to swallow it, I swear, I would have vomited. VILE, and I don't care what you do to it, it smelled disgusting and the nibble I tried was beyond terrible, worse than Jello, which I at least can stomach the odd tastes of.

How can people liken it to scrapple and ham products.... it is really horrid. I thought it smelled putrid but he said that is the normal smell. And I've eaten bugs, folks. Which, by the way, can be pretty good. He's forgiven though, because he also took me to a family Easter supper, and I got to try a home glazed ham. Plus, there's the opera named Rebecca, I can be skinny or fat- he adores me both ways, and I always get as much sashimi as I care to stuff in my mouth at dinner, he's totally forgiven.

[srhcb]

okra and blubber

SB 

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Separately? If together, please share the recipe....

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I was reminded of this story while replying to a post on another discussion board on the subject of a recent PBS documentary.

Long, long ago, a girl a year older than us, (and a cheerleader besides), invited my friend Luke and I over to her parent's house in the afternoon to listen to a new record album. We figured it would be polite fo bring something for lunch.

I was staying with an aunt at the time, and rummaging through the back of her cupboards we unearthed cans of okra and whale blubber. I don't know how she happened to have these two items on hand, neither of which are very common here in Nothern Minnesota, but suspect they may have been connected to her having hosted a Japanese foreign exchange student a few years previous.

In any case, we decide she wouldn't miss them, and Luke and I set off to the cheerleader's house. Between the texture of the canned okra and the odor of the whale, there was no way, separate or together, we could eat either one.

This culinary disaster may have affected out musical judgement, because we didn't like the new record album either. (Incidently, we were never invited over to that girl's house again.)

In the years since, although I've never tried blubber again, I have had decent okra dishes, and I've come to be a big fan of Bob Dylan, whose first record album was what we listened to that day.

SB (never had much luck with cheerleaders again though)

Edited October 9, 2005 by srhcb (log)

[jgm]

Years ago, I my landlady invited me to share a special meal with her and her friends. Osso buco. The area had a lot of Basque immigrants, and she claimed it was an "authentic" recipe. (Is osso buco of Basque origin?)

Most of the dish was quite edible and not bad at all, but the meat... uggggggh. Those who've had good osso buco insist she must have used mutton instead of lamb. My family has never eaten much lamb, so I didn't know much about its flavor. But I've had lamb since, and found it quite lovely. Nothing like what was in this stew, so perhaps the mutton assumption is correct.

I don't know how I made it through that bowl of stew, but somehow I did. Everyone else seemed to enjoy it very much, but maybe they were faking it, like me.

[Daniel]

Beefcheeks,

thats a hilarious story.. I dont know how I would react in that situation.. Most likely i would feel comfortable enough to stop a cousin, or certainly never let them live it down. Have you had any experiences with her since..

[M.X.Hassett]

"authentic" recipe.  (Is osso buco of Basque origin?)

Nothing like what was in this stew, so perhaps the mutton assumption  is correct. 

I don't know how I made it through that bowl of stew,

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I am not sure of the origin of osso buco(I always thought N.Italy). But I have eaten plenty of it and I have never seen or heard of it in stew form.

[Chris Amirault]

"authentic" recipe.  (Is osso buco of Basque origin?)

Nothing like what was in this stew, so perhaps the mutton assumption  is correct. 

I don't know how I made it through that bowl of stew,

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I am not sure of the origin of osso buco(I always thought N.Italy). But I have eaten plenty of it and I have never seen or heard of it in stew form.

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Always been veal shanks when I've made or eaten it, too....

[xdrixn]

tobacco pudding. Maybe it takes a smoker to appreciate it it, which I am not, but I wanted to spit on the floor. I didn't order it. They sent it out, which gave me the impression they couldn't sell it.

bleech!

[ratgirlny]

My father's lowfat lasagna, made with lowfat cheese and ground turkey. Utterly tasteless, like eating soggy cardboard.

[ludja]

First time I ordered (and ate) rabbit in a small restaurant in SF. It was a really ungodly combination of mustard and cranberries and the texture of the meat was slippery and rubbery. I've blocked out any other recollection of the dish.

I know that mustard is extremely traditional with French rabbit dishes and I don't think that by itself was the problem. It was the complete flavor combination and texture. This was probably one of the only times past childhood that I can remember not being able to eat what was on my plate.

I would like to try rabbit again sometime (I think) but I will wait until I'm in a good bistro here or in France.

[popover]

Ever had something so bad at a restaurant you were forced to return it or order something else. Well it happened to me in Nyc actually at Sarabeth and I got their safe tomato soup instead of the mud ravioli I got.

[popover]

My father's lowfat lasagna, made with lowfat cheese and ground turkey. Utterly tasteless, like eating soggy cardboard.

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I could sympathize with you Ludja it sounds pretty awfull! Did it taste like chicken? That texture you describe gives me the chills.

[Country Cook]

I was travelling in Finland with my parents in 1977 and I had been subjected to a number of "worsts" (a creamed chipped beef hot sandwich comes to mind). Finland is not known for it's cuisine. We had rented a little cabin to spend a day or so between visiting my Mom's relatives and I was looking forward to a home cooked meal of hamburgers. What I didn't know was the butchers put liver in the ground beef to improve the color , I hadn't developed a taste for liver then so the whole meal was a bust for me. I did have one good burger at MacDonald's in Helsinki though. I'm glad I'm a less picky eater now though.

[ludja]

...

    I could sympathize with you Ludja it sounds pretty awfull!  Did it taste like chicken?  That texture you describe gives me the chills.

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I don't remember having that impression, but there were so many other flavors in the dish as well. I feel it may really have been the preparation and recipe that sank the dish.

[rooftop1000]

I was going to say a very recent dish, but then I remembered I have eaten Harkarl...fermented shark which strangely wasnt the worst thing on the plate. The worst was one of those foods where you just know you cant swallow unless you chew one more time but ...if you chew you may spew. My poor husband is watching me terrified of what is about to happen......I swallowed. I dont seem to like Icelandic pickled herring....the testicles were fine and the roasted lamb was amazing but but .....

Other than that meal it was probabley Larb....sorry. At least the Larb I kept trying...it was hand minced nice texture perfect balance of lime and fish sauce little tart, little fishy funky, nice ground rice on top served with romaine and cucumber....yech

My daughter brought it back to her dorm...the BF loved it

tracey

[Katie Nell]

Cheeseburger Hamburger Helper... thought to myself, "everyone else likes it, so I'm going to give it a try! this might be a good, cheap meal for a poor college student like me!" Conclusion: I'm not that poor or that desperate!

[sazji]

I used to teach every summer at a Balkan music camp on the East Coast. The first year I went, a nasty divorce had resulted in the normal cook leaving, and they brought in a cook whose staff was a bunch of kids from some local reform school. Every meal we had was the worst meal I ever had. Hints were to be had the first morning, as I watched a woman cleaning a machine with a pictue of coffee beans on the front. There was a plastic bottle with some dark liquid in it that I assumed was antiseptic. It turned out to be the coffee.

The first night we had "beef." Large slices of raw beef were laid out in large roasting pans with nothing on them and cremated in the ovens. They were like pieces of leather. This was accompanied by an undressed salad. There was always a large bowl of fruit that was at least a week away from ripeness; we took to hoarding it in the cabins. One salad was memorable for including slices of avocado that were so rock hard that the outer shell of the seed had adhered to the flesh. No saving that one. The rest I believe I have blanked out...

[jvictor930]

Oh, it should have been so simple, if you looked at the directions. My freshman year of college, my girlfriend at the time had gotten a new apartment and decided she wanted to cook for me. Considering she had the culinary IQ of a monkey with a lobotomy, I normally did the cooking as to avoid any, shall we say, incidents. When she would have these insane thoughts of actually cooking, my survival instinct would kick in and I'd usually give her a "that's ok, I appreciate the thought, but why go through the trouble?" This time, she insisted and I caved. This is the person that thought Gourmet food came from the Budget Gourmet, so how bad could it be? Oh, if I'd only known.

So out comes the bag of Chicken Voila, which if you read the directions, you can't screw up, or so I thought. First of all, she didn't catch the "Just add chicken" labeling on the front, so this would turn out to be just Voila. Now, I'm sure Voila is supposed to taste like something other than bait, but I'll never know. So there was this bag of veggies and sauce to be heated, which should have been an easy enough task. Oh no, not for her! She decided to (and considering this was Emeril's old stomping grounds, I'll allow the reference) kick it up a notch. I'd rather she kicked me in the nuts. She added this mixture of spices that felt like I had eaten alum. Mind you, I wasn't allowed in the kitchen during this fiasco, so I don't exactly know what she put inside, but my digestive system began to churn from the first bite. I got through about a quarter of it and made the made dash to the bathroom.

After I emerge from paying homage to the folks at American Standard, she wanted to know what was wrong. I just asked if this was supposed to have chicken in it. The response I got was "No wonder it tasted funny!" Not feeling well, I excused myself, went home, and vowed to never let her cook for me again.

Now, the ironic part. This was hotel school, and now she's a kitchen manager at a Macaroni Grill! And my friends wonder why I avoid the place like the plague.

And people wonder why I'm now engaged to a fellow foodie!

[jgm]

Now, the ironic part.  This was hotel school, and now she's a kitchen manager at a Macaroni Grill!  And my friends wonder why I avoid the place like the plague.

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Uh, would you wanna drop us a hint as to which city this restaurant might be in?