Is Tipping Big the New Black?

[raxelita]

In a sense, NYC restaurants are doing away with the tip. Since most of the finer and corporate places are pool houses, your tip no longer directly "Insures Proper Service:" an excellent server will be tipped the same as a poor one. And now that managers get a large part of their salary from the tip pool, the gesture has become a huge part of labor-cost saving on the part of owners. It really is quite close to the European method, with the tip being customary rather than compulsary... a thin line.

[Tess]

Ron, don't feel bad. If the server were just clumsy or slow or had an irritating voice, I can see feeling bad if you're not sure they weren't doing their best and you left a (for you) low tip. But the aggressive upselling is deliberate on his part, and my experience is that when this goes on it's also the policy of the establishment. It's true that the 17% tip may not communicate much to them as it's an amount a lot of people would consider fine, but at least you are not sending the clearly positive message what a 20% tip is. (At least, I usually get a nice "thank you" for that size tip.)

[K8memphis]

Waitress gets a $50,000 tip and a car.

Story here.

"BROWNSVILLE, Texas - For nearly seven years Melina Salazar did her best to put on a smile and tend to the every need of her most loyal and cantankerous customer.

She made sure his food was as hot as he wanted, even if it meant he burned his mouth. And she smiled through his demands and curses. The 89-year-old Walter "Buck" Swords obviously appreciated it, leaving the waitress $50,000 and a 2000 Buick when he died."

She said he was kind of mean. He kind of made up for it huh.

[chemprof]

I'm not ready to leave 50K ( you should see the movie "Waitress" if you haven't!). However, I do try to tip 15-20% (usually 20) unless the service totally sucks. It's a hard, hard, job, and I have many students who do it (some of who end up serving me, and I don't want to get a bad reputation! )

[grumpy7]

I'm not in the restaurant business and I've always wondered do restaurants expect people to tip when they get a take-out order? Not a delivery order, but an order that they pick up and take home themselves?

What do most people do?

[aroberts]

I'm not in the restaurant business and I've always wondered do restaurants expect people to tip when they get a take-out order? Not a delivery order, but an order that they pick up and take home themselves? 

No, that would be silly. Even when eating in the service is included most places these days. Except in the US, I've heard. They seem to like tipping for everything over there. And a lot of people pay by credit card even for small bills.

[grumpy7]

No, that would be silly. Even when eating in the service is included most places these days.  Except in the US, I've heard. They seem to like tipping for everything over there. And a lot of people pay by credit card even for small bills.

←

Oh man. You mean the 20% I leave every day to the place I pick up my breakfast to go is just silly? No, seriously, I was just wondering, because I get A LOT of takeout and the guys are very nice to me. I call up and order my usual from a lot of fairly upscale places. The service is not included at any of these places -- all in the US. Just checking if the folks were expecting a tip.

By the way, what does paying by credit card have to do with leaving or not leaving a tip?

Edited February 10, 2008 by grumpy7 (log)

[Synergy]

And a lot of people pay by credit card even for small bills.

So???

I use my credit card for almost everything. I pay it off every month and I get to take a free trip every year because of it. Credit cards with rewards on them can be very... rewarding, as long as you don't carry a balance.

[suzilightning]

And a lot of people pay by credit card even for small bills.

So???

I use my credit card for almost everything. I pay it off every month and I get to take a free trip every year because of it. Credit cards with rewards on them can be very... rewarding, as long as you don't carry a balance.

←

it is good for you but for any place that uses credit cards they have to pay a fee for every transaction. that is why IF we use a credit card to pay the bill the tip is always in cash. even if it has to be split it doesn't lose value because of the transaction fee.

course the other day i was having my e/o week lunch at a favorite place eating lunch at the bar when the bartender was also serving the 4 top in the dining room. the payer was the new owner of the restaurant about 1/8 mile away. bill was 67.00 - tip was 10.00 not quite but close to 15%. now i used to work the back of the house. i respect those people who work the front - something i could not do- and i will tip 20-30 % if my food comes quickly, is hot if supposed to be hot and i am not ignored.

the last time i tipped 15% was at a local diner when there obviously weren't enough servers and the owners were so busy reveling in their recent "Food TV" apearence that they didn't see i had sat for 1/4 hour without touching anything on my plate waiting for the server to come by and a) give me my check and b) bring a takeout box for the leftover food. when i paid the bill the owner said "how was it" and i honestly said " the burger was a bit over cooked but edible" (i asked for it medium rare and it was medium well) and that i thought they might be a bit light on help for the volume of patrons since i had to wait so long for my server to get back to me to box the food up and deliver the check - not that she had time to ask if the food was cooked properly. all i got from the former owner was a blank look.

guess i'm not going to the JEFFERSON DINER any time soon.

[grumpy7]

I think most owners would rather have people pay with a credit card than not pay at all, by not going to their restaurant. That's why 99% of restaurants in the US accept credit cards. They've built the 4% transaction fee into the prices and as far as I know they do not deduct the fee from the tip before it gets distributed to the staff.

Edited February 12, 2008 by grumpy7 (log)

[JimH]

The service charge/fixed gratuity is a problem when the service is bad. What do you do, not pay the full bill? Having been close to the business, I know how hard the work is and how ungreatful some people can be for good service. When I get good service I'm going to tip well with no reason other than rewarding someone for their hard work. I tip delivery people well too, I've endured Houston traffic for 25 years it's not Mexico City but it's as close to "Road Warrior" as you can get.

[Synergy]

I think most owners would rather have people pay with a credit card than not pay at all, but not going to their restaurant. That's why 99% of restaurants in the US accept credit cards. They've built the 4% transaction fee into the prices and as far as I know they do not deduct the fee from the tip before it gets distributed to the staff.

←

Exactly.

Credit card transaction fees are just part of the business expenses in North America.

[Nathan]

I tip 20-25% standard.

I'd tip less for poor service but virtually never have it.

[jackal10]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping. I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

Edited February 12, 2008 by jackal10 (log)

[Busboy]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and am used to not tipping, being European,  I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, not make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

If I want to reward exceptional service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

That's basically a thin rationalization for fraud. You're protestations about tax evasion (largely irrelevant, as tips are reported to the IRS as a percentage of ring) and the servers' self esteem ring hollow; I suspect your concerns stretch no farther than your stomach and your wallet.

You know the rules going into the restaurant; if you don't like them, don't eat out.

[hummingbirdkiss]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.   I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

I worked as a server all through high school and college and all I can say to this is "OUCH!!!" ...I loved that I had a great relationship with my customers and when they asked for me (big tippers or not) I was honored they had such a good time they wanted to have me serve them again ..I never ever thought of myself as prostituting!!!

my college tuition was paid by tip money so many thanks to all of you out there who do NOT feel this way!!!

I tip very well to say the least ..if I get lousy service I consider what the reason is before I short the server ..but honestly ..it is rare someone treats me badly if they do I tip less and leave a note explaining why ...

as far as tax evasion ..I paid taxes on my tips ..period

Edited February 12, 2008 by hummingbirdkiss (log)

[Alchemist]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.  I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

WOW.

[Busboy]

Speaking of tipping and stiffing and black, my daughter is going to NYC (where they all wear black) with her high school art club (I am forbidden from chaperoning ) but they sent around a note with the behavior rules which the two of us were to read and sign. Among them was a reminder that students needed to bring enough money to get their own meals -- with a delightful suggestion that they bring enough to avoid McD's and enjoy New York's culinary diversity -- and that students should tip 15%. This kicked off a question of whether she and her buds knew how to tip properly which in turn brought a condescending "of course, dad," followed by a mischievous grin and "...but there was this one time when the waiter was really being a jerk."

"So did you leave a tip?"

"Of course. I wrote 'don't run into the street without looking both ways' on a napkin and we all walked out."

Not that I condone this type of behavior, but....

[hummingbirdkiss]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.   I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

WOW.

←

I know huh? that actually hurt my feelings and I have not been a server in many many many years!!! I just remember how hard I worked at my job and how much pride I took in it and this makes it sound like drudge work that he could care less about ...bring me my food shut up, go away and do not expect any recognition for a job well done ..ok then I will!

[daisy17]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.  I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

Infuriating. I'd like to hear your thoughts after you've worked in a restaurant for a single day, making $3 an hour before tips and busting your ass to make your customers happy. The servers don't make the rules, but they sure as hell have bills to pay.

[Poffertjes]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.  I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

So much for 'When in Rome'....

[Alchemist]

Wow again. I barley know what to say. The way Jackel10 describes service depresses me beyond belief. I can only hope that now and forever they receive NOTHING but uninspired service. I have been in the service industry for 25 years, and I love it. I love cooking for people, I love waiting on them. I love making drinks for them. There can be great fulfillment by bringing happiness to someone through serving them. There is a give and take that is just this side of sex. Why do you think so many guys hit on waitresses, and so many women end up in bed with the bartender. There is something to be said for someone who enjoys making someone else happy. I will do my best not to imagine what someone who thinks that people who provide pleasure are just whores is like in the sack.

I love eating out, I love to be served. Good service can elevate mediocre food. If I think about places that I am a regular it is because of the service. Amazing food and drink is wonderful, but if it is brought to me with rudeness/snobbishness, I won’t be back.

I am not mad, like hummingbird kiss. I am sad for jackel10 for they will probably never have a transcendent meal, a meal where food, service and company come together to make a perfect night.

ETA Grammar

Edited February 12, 2008 by Alchemist (log)

[hummingbirdkiss]

I am not angry that would be a waste ..but my feelings where hurt when I read that... after all the years even ...I worked so hard to think there are people who feel this way about tipping is kind of sad...it is such a part of our culture ...I really believe my skills as an RN now are directly related to the fast multi tasking and customer appreciation I learned as a food server ..I joke with my patients now when they say I am good at my job and tell them I went from being a waitress to being a waitress with syringes..I take great pride in what made me the person I am today....in healthcare especially...because being a server taught me to bust my hump and make people happy ...

tipping is part of our culture and if you dont like it then by no means should you eat in a restaurant where it is expected that is for sure ..or you do hurt peoples feelings ..not everyone basis self esteem on job proformance but I did and still do ...especially however when I was younger ...if that is not an issue with you then so be it...but for me it is that is for sure...

Edited February 12, 2008 by hummingbirdkiss (log)

[Felice]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.  I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

I think we should give Jackal10 the benefit of the doubt that he doesn't understand how restaurant workers are paid in the US, which is very unlike the European system.

There is a sub-minimum wage by law in the US for restaurant workers because it is assumed that they make tips. I do not know the laws in all states, but in Pennsylvania, where I last worked in the States, the legal wage was 2.01$ per hour and waiters had to claim either a fixed percentage of their sales or the total of their credit card tips, which ever is higher, as taxable wage. Restaurants can get in a lot of trouble if servers do not declare their tips and where I last worked, servers paid their taxes on a weekly basis, which meant that we owed the restaurant money since our pay did not cover our taxes owed.

And so, fear not, the American server is indeed paying taxes on the amount of every bill, regardless of whether they are tipped or not.

This is the system, like it or not ,and so it seems that if someone knowingly doesn't tip at all for good service, it's a little like saying to anyone you might hire to perform a service, after he's finished the job, 'I just don't feel like paying for this service', which doesn't appear all that fair.

It has nothing to do with making a relationship; it is about paying for a service you have asked for by sitting down. Now, if someone doesn't know that servers only work for tips in the US, that is a different story.

[newbie21]

I never tip.

I am unlikely to return, and being European I am used to not tipping.   I do not care what the server thinks of me after they have served the meal.

I fail to see why the restaurant should advertise prices 20% below the actual price, nor collude in a tax evasion, nor make the server beg or prostitute themselves.

I am not trying to make a relationship with the servers. Their role is to take my order and bring the plates, wine etc. Their pay and quality standards are  a matter for the restaurant management, not me.

If I want to praise and reward exceptional food or service above the norm I would write to the restaurant's managment, next day or next week.

←

I think we should give Jackal10 the benefit of the doubt that he doesn't understand how restaurant workers are paid in the US, which is very unlike the European system.

There is a sub-minimum wage by law in the US for restaurant workers because it is assumed that they make tips. I do not know the laws in all states, but in Pennsylvania, where I last worked in the States, the legal wage was 2.01$ per hour and waiters had to claim either a fixed percentage of their sales or the total of their credit card tips, which ever is higher, as taxable wage. Restaurants can get in a lot of trouble if servers do not declare their tips and where I last worked, servers paid their taxes on a weekly basis, which meant that we owed the restaurant money since our pay did not cover our taxes owed.

And so, fear not, the American server is indeed paying taxes on the amount of every bill, regardless of whether they are tipped or not.

This is the system, like it or not ,and so it seems that if someone knowingly doesn't tip at all for good service, it's a little like saying to anyone you might hire to perform a service, after he's finished the job, 'I just don't feel like paying for this service', which doesn't appear all that fair.

It has nothing to do with making a relationship; it is about paying for a service you have asked for by sitting down. Now, if someone doesn't know that servers only work for tips in the US, that is a different story.

←

Thanks for pointing that out. I certainly hope you have enlightened Jackal10 as to what servers actually make per hour, and that they do indeed have to declare taxes for a percentage of their ring, whether they get tipped or not. I, too, was in the restaurant business for 15 years, and getting stiffed is literally taking money out of the servers' pockets. Jackal10 needs a reality check.