Kitchen Fantasy

[hathor]

In a fantasy world, where eGullet could wave a magic wand and grant you your wish, what would you wish for in your kitchen? A window that looks out on to an olive grove? A jar of caviar that never gets empty?

I would wish for a knife sharpener. I mean a person, preferably tall and handsome, with incredible pecs, that would come and sharpen my knives. Every day.

I also have a really crappy electric stove/oven in my apartment, and I would love a great big gas range with at least 3 separate ovens.

Well, after all these years, I've learned how to coax the best out of the stove, but I sure wish that knife sharpener would show up.

What would you wish for?

[winesonoma]

Julia Child as my mother and Jacques Pepin as my uncle who lived next door.

[jsolomon]

Paid for...

[Pickles]

Oh..more counter space....PLEASE!!!

[snowangel]

Self cleaning everything. I have three kids...

A floor that would mop itself. A fridge that would rid itself of ickies. A dishwasher that would load and unload itself and put everything where it should be (according to me). Surfaces that would miraculously clean themselves. Etc., etc.

[Mabelline]

An old-fashioned kitchen sort of like the old days. Big ole walk-in pantry with all the tables and sinks and freezers we had when I was a kid. A massive kitchen with a long table and benches, a hoosier cabinet with enamelware pullout. An outside cooking room for hot weather, all screened in under some monster shade trees, for the hot summer work. Please eG Kitchen fairy, may I?Oh, and can't forget the furnace register where you warmed up the little babies born when it was too cold (animal babies, I'd better add.)

[hillvalley]

Self cleaning everything. I have three kids...

A floor that would mop itself. A fridge that would rid itself of ickies. A dishwasher that would load and unload itself and put everything where it should be (according to me). Surfaces that would miraculously clean themselves. Etc., etc.

Susan beat me to it, except mine would be in the form of a man.

I like the never ending caviar jar too, but it would have to change variety every few days.

There would be a window overlooking the beach. And it would have a door that led to the porch, that had a hammoc, but that's another fantasy.

And an amazing sound system.

[Chris Cognac]

A fridge that replaces food when you use it! a more realistic idea is a good gas stove with flat griddle and a high heat broiler on the top part...oh yea baby, I could tear it up with one of those!

[bloviatrix]

A better kitchen to accomodate a kosher cook. This means self-cleaning double wall ovens. In addition to my 4 burner cook-top a separate 2 burner cook-top elsewhere. Two more dishwashers (the fisher-paykel double dishwasher is acceptable). Granite countertops. A bigger refrigerator/freezer. And a third sink.

I like the idea of a self-cleaning floor as well.

[fifi]

My kitchen has this little box, the Acme Precision Laser Slicer. I put garlic cloves into the box. I twirl the dials. The lasers flash on. I open the box and take out 1 cup full of perfect finely diced garlic. I put an onion in the box. I twirl the dials...

I take out my Acme Magic Plasma Heat Sensor. I point it at my pork butt. On the screen I see a 3-D color coded temperature profile in real time. You can also rotate the picture to check the underside of that chicken thigh.

Red bell peppers and poblanos are on sale for 10 cents apiece. I get the huge bag of them home. I take out the Acme Magic Infrared Focusing Heat Blaster. I twirl the dials. I point the Blaster at the peppers. Using the principles of quantum physics, the infrared rays instantly wrap around the peppers giving me a perfect char of the skin, regardless of the wonky shape of those poblanos.

I have a 16 quart pot of lovingly prepared beef stock. I get out the Acme Instant Substance Remover and Concentrator. I twiddle the dials. I aim at the pot and shoot. The predetermined amount of water molecules travel up the selective anti-gravity beam and into the receiving chamber. I now have demi-glace. The beam can also be set to remove the fat and collect into jars for preservation and future use. It works on roasting pans as well.

Can you tell that I find some things a PITA and I don't trust thermometers?

You did say dream kitchen didn't you?

[Moopheus]

The key thing about my fantasy kitchen is that it's in my fantasy house in the country with the view of the Berkshires out the back window overlooking the fantasy kitchen garden with the fresh veggies and berries in it and not in my nonfantasy crackerbox Brooklyn tenement rathole apartment.

[Mabelline]

So how come the boxes at the top are not advertising magic wands?

[hillvalley]

I forgot about my herb garden that grows all year. Basil, parsley, oregano, cilantro, sorrel. Maybe a roma tomato plant as well.

Edited to add that Moopheus beat me to it while I was writing

Edited February 20, 2004 by hillvalley (log)

[SobaAddict70]

Self peeling garlic cloves and onions.

Food replicators a la Star Trek so I can get my "tea, Earl Grey, hot" whenever I want.

Oh, and a holographic chef with the face of Eric Ripert, the body of Tom Cruise and the talents of Mario Batali, Alice Waters and Escoffier all rolled up into one. If you can't have the real thing, might as well go for second best.

Soba

[purplewiz]

Self-decluttering. All that stuff that magically appears on all my countertops, leaving a 2" x 3" space for me to cook in, would simply disappear off to the places it should be.

I'd also like a year 'round farmer's market to stock my fridge. I'd just wake up in the morning and have all the fresh veggies I wanted for dinner. And a private chef on call for those nights when it's 5:45pm and I just don't feel like cooking.

If not that, I'd like a new range with a gas cooktop, better lighting, a greenhouse window for my plants, and some kind of solid surface countertops in some color other than the mauve that the house came with (What WERE they thinking?). Unfortunately, kitchen remodeling is not at the top of the home renovation list just yet.

Marcia.

[Brad Ballinger]

Giada de Laurentiis in an apron, and nothing else.

[OrmIrian]

20 ft of counter space, magic old food evaporator in the fridge, tiny robot that blasts miller moths with a tiny death ray, and a devilled egg dispenser.

[Katherine]

I take out my Acme Magic Plasma Heat Sensor. I point it at my pork butt. On the screen I see a 3-D color coded temperature profile in real time. You can also rotate the picture to check the underside of that chicken thigh.

Ok, fifi, your prayers have been answered. The wireless temperature sensing device is last millenium's technology.

My fantasy kitchen comes with a maid and handyman.

[misstenacity]

The ultimate kitchen "accessory": a backyard garden full of all manner of veg & fruit, tended to by - definitely not me - a lovely to look at wonderful gardener. Clothing optional, of course, but I won't be picky when they are minding the raspberry patch.

Andrea, salivating

in Cedar Crest, NM

[Carlovski]

As well as the boring old hot and cold taps, I would have chicken stock and wine.

[Katherine]

As well as the boring old hot and cold taps, I would have chicken stock and wine.

Microbrew and sparkling wine on tap!

[Mabelline]

I forgot one very important ingredient. My kitchen would be complete with both of my grams there to cook with, and listen to.

Andrea, you would be required during raspberry tending to stand by with the bottle of 'monkey blood' (iodine). Are you up to the work?

Damn Katherine, that's a way cool probe. 89 bucks is not too bad.

[bleudauvergne]

A door that opens out into a garden which is also a fruit grove which also has a shaded terrace for dining and a smoke house.

[hathor]

Oh, Maybelline...what I would give to have my grandmother around, her pumpkin pie was ...lost, when she went. And I can't even come close to replicating it.

[Raynickben]

I wish for a thunderous round of applause and maybe a marching band or two; no matter what I cook.