I will never again . . . (Part 1)

[Fat Guy]

I will never again . . .

. . . crack an egg directly into a bowl that has all the other eggs in it already, because one fucked-up egg will ruin the entire batch.

[Varmint]

I promise, I swear, I covenant that I will never again pan roast something, put it in the oven, take it out of the oven, remove the meat, and begin to deglaze the pan while grabbing the (DAMN, THAT'S REALLY HOT) handle.

[Stone]

Forget to put the cap on the blender tightly and lean on it with a towel when pureeing hot soup, or should I say, napalm.

[Fat Guy]

. . . forget which does what: baking powder or baking soda.

[LaNiña]

...leave the cover off of my Weber grill, then have it rain, and have the ash turn to gray brown mush and pour down my landlord's deck...

[oliva]

Broil anything for more than one minute!

I have burnt two beautiful gratins already!

[CathyL]

...leave the kitchen when toasting nuts.

...try to make cookie dough with a hand mixer.

...open the oven door to see why the broiler hasn't lit without turning the knob to 'off' first.

...grab a hot pan with a wet potholder.

[Varmint]

I did not do this, but I witnessed it:

. . . use self-rising flour to make fresh pasta.

[cakewalk]

Is it Yom Kippur already?

I will never again press down the handle of my french press too fast and too hard. Yeah, right.

[polly]

... absent-mindedly strain stock by placing a colander in the sink and pouring it all down the drain

[Varmint]

Excellent

[Fat Guy]

You have no idea how much I respect that.

[ShawtyCat]

I definately have to second Fat Guy! I made that mistake once and that one bad egg f***** up my night. Especially since it was the LAST f****** egg of the 30 ounces of eggs I needed for my THREE batches of brownies! Oh well, live and learn.

I also have to add this one:

Sifting powdered sugar into my Cream Cheese Icing and not checking to make sure I lowered the setting on my mixer to low. I looked like I got hit with a bag of flour.

[Fat Guy]

Ah, but I've made the mistake twice. So I'm far stupider than you.

[schaem]

I didn't do this, but...

Assume the liquid boiling on the stove was blanching water and use it to cook gnocchi, then hear the pastry cook ask, "What happened to my simple syrup?"

[ShawtyCat]

Ah....what sweet Gnocchi you have my dear....

[chopjwu12]

ive got two one by me and another that i witness to.

Mine poor the frying oil back intio the industrial fryer without checking if i left the emptying tube open. Oil everywhere. I am far stupider then everyone because i did it twice one week apart.

The other deals with oil as well. Hot oil. I will tell everyone never ever to dump 375 degree frying oil into a plastic lexan. Not good.

Wait i witnessed another oil incident at school. I will not leave the potato's that i want to fry next to the fryer in there water. Someone came by and knocked the watewr over all into the fryer. I never say oil rise to 8 feet before. Thank god knowone was right next to it. Hot oil went fling everywhere.

[levyme]

... absent-mindedly strain stock by placing a colander in the sink and pouring it all down the drain

i was extremely hungover one morning and opened the release valve of a steam kettle full of beautiful veal stock into a strainer that was straining onto the floor and into my shoes and scalding my feet.

[Fat Guy]

. . . forget I put that bottle of wine in the freezer . . .

[levyme]

. . . forget I put that bottle of wine in the freezer . . .

actually i just did that about an hour ago with a bottle of chimay

[Fat Guy]

I'm so susceptible to that one that I try never to invoke the freezer method. I was just over at my mother's place helping her get ready for a dinner party and I had to chill down two bottles of white and I started putting ice in a big thing -- I think it must have been a flower pot -- and my mother was like "Why don't you just put it in the freezer?" and I almost screamed.

[levyme]

i think i was about fifteen when a friend and i found a bottle of dom perioign 62' at my grandmother's house. only knowing that it was good from the mention of it in "You only live twice" i immediately suggested we put it in the freezer to cool it down. I returned a month later to defrost and scrub the freezre down the contents of a bottle that i will probably never come in contact with let alone be served chilled

[Basildog]

Poach pears with salt instead of sugar

[Dana]

I am SOOOO glad I'm not the only one who's strained my stock into the drain!!!!!Thank you all so much.

[Huevos del Toro]

. . . forget I put that bottle of wine in the freezer . . .

That's why I keep one of my Poulder thermometer/timers permanently attached to the side of my refrigerator. I couldn't guess how many times I forgot something in the freezer until I finally wised up.