Not so random acts of kindness - restaurants etc.

[phaelon56]

I'vre been absent from my favorite local espresso bar for a few weeks, in part due to a short term financial crunch and for a few schedule reasons. Imagine my surprise when the cafe owner knocked on my door this past Sunday afternoon. She said she was in the neighborhood for a walk, handed me a stack of "free drink" cards and then mentioned that I'd been missed and they wanted to be sure I was okay.

Her sister lives in the neighborhood (which is why she knows where I live) and she really does come there to do her walking but I was blown away by this act of kindness. Sure... it was a very savvy business move but hardly one that the average business owner would think to undertake. They already had my business and my loyalty but it's now been permanently cemented as of this occurrence.

Share with us some not so random act of kindness that a restaurateur, bar or cafe owner, perhaps even a grocer or butcher has undertaken on your behalf. Something warm and fuzzy or it could even be crazy and funny - nothing wrong with hearing good news in this crazy world of ours.

I'l relate one that happened to my former employer Herb. He was a regular (and a big spender) at an upscale local restaurant. The restaurant owners got wind of the fact that he was going into the hospital for some eye related surgery (back in the days when one stayed in the hospital for a few days for cataract surgery).

On his first day of recovery one of the cooks showed up in chef's whites and a toque to serve Herb his favorite dinner on a silver platter (literally), complete with side dishes, cultlery and a half bottle of his favorite wine.

Brilliant... absolutely friggin' brilliant! Twenty years later he still recounts the story whenever restaurant service becomes a topic of casual discussion. You can't buy better advertising than that. Were they shrewd and calculating when they chose to do this for him? Absolutely. They were also smart and caring.

So.... what happened to you?

[Raynickben]

I eat a certain cheeseburger combination and the owner of this place I used to go to put it on his menu with my name in the title. I thought that was pretty cool (and I sent lots of friends there to eat it )

[Gifted Gourmet]

Not uninteresting what a small gesture on behalf of the restaurant gains in terms of "good will" and "word of mouth" references to friends and family. Would that more of them would acknowledge these small touches which make dining out so pleasurable, so personal.

[Chad]

More great acts-of-kindness stories can be found in the discussion of Ingridsf's article. Restaurants doing a little something extra pays off in big ways.

Chad

[Cynthia G]

I have an ongoing medical situation. The men who own my neighborhood cafe always check on me if they see my car home in the middle of the day and often bring me meals gratis just so they know I am eating when not feeling up to cooking. Perhaps not totally random since I'm a neighbor, but extremely kind and caring anyway. What a blessing they are!

[balmagowry]

Not uninteresting what a small gesture on behalf of the restaurant gains in terms of "good will" and "word of mouth" references to friends and family. Would that more of them would acknowledge these small touches which make dining out so pleasurable, so personal.

Damn right. I for one would like to know where this "favorite local espresso bar" is, Owen - sounds like the kind of place I'd want to go to and/or recommend....

[NulloModo]

Some friends of mine and I used to be regulars at this local place, and got to know some of the waitstaff fairly well. After a while they would occasionally sit down with us and just chat for a while if it was a slot night/towards the end of their shift (which was usually when we could come in anyway).

Over time I think we somehow made an impression by generally just being understanding and cutting them some slack if they made minor booboos, as well as listening and counseling when some of them were going through rough times, and somehow it started to spread through the staff to watch out for us. It got to the point where our meals were often comped at least half off, drinks we ordered were only charged for if management saw them being made, and even in the busiest times it was quite rare for us to have to wait for a table, somehow one just the size of our party opened up.

Unfortunately (well, unforunately for us, fortunately for them I suppose) this being a college town a lot of the waitstaff graduated and went off to bigger and better things, and the new waitstaff seemed to lack that pizazz and desire to come talk, so, it sort of faded back into a regular restaurant, and over time our patronage has just drifted off.

[Suzanne F]

It works both ways.

After 9/11, as soon as Alberto and Marco who ran The Little Place were allowed back in (2 blocks away from the site), they grabbed the stack of delivery slips and started checking on their customers. As soon as anyone else could get through the barricades, people started leaving them notes. By the time they were finally able to reopen on 11/1/01, well, let me just say that everyone was very, very happy to see each other. We were there, to celebrate HWOE's birthday as well as their rebirth.

A little while after that, they held a "raffle" to raise money for their impending move. All of us regulars bought lots of tickets, even though the prize was just something like a week's lunches there. Why would we do that? Where were they moving? Right next door, to a bigger space. The Little Bigger Place.

We've met their family (they are brothers-in-law), and if they don't see us for a little while, they ask the people we brought there -- now regulars on their own -- after us.

As someone has already mentioned, it is absolutely the cheapest way to build a loyal clientele: just be nice.

[john b]

On Mother's Day we were in Disneyworld. We had dinner at Flying Fish at the Boardwalk. When our main courses arrived, my wife instinctively pushed her plate aside and grabbed my 5 y/o son's plate to cut his food. The waiter saw this and said, "You eat. I'll cut his steak."

That was way cool.

[Kim WB]

just be nice.

The notourious stickler has pegged it ten fold in the above quote. not magic, not marketing...just be NICE.

[TJHarris]

My parents were regulars at a small Chinese restaurant outside of Detroit. When my father retired, they moved south to Tennessee. My father had mentioned that they were going to be moving to the owners and thanked them for many years of wonderful food. When my parents arrived at their new home with the U-haul truck, there was a package waiting for them. The restaurant had packaged and shipped some of my parents favorite dishes so that they wouldn't have to find a meal when they got off the road. This was an incredible gesture as a thank you for many years of patronage.

[fiftydollars]

Last year I took my wife to Fleur de Lys in San Francisco to celebrate our first anniversary (well that and it seemed like a really good excuse to go to Fleur de Lys and eat Hubert Keller's food).

Anyway... If you've been there you know that the dining room, while beautifully decorated, is small and in some areas you are quite close to the other tables. The server in the table next to us must have overheard us talking about our anniversary because at the end of the meal we were served a fantastic celebratory dessert complete with fire and a personalized message.

I know it's Fleur de Lys and you have to expect great service, but the unprecedented display of nosy omniscience was unexpected and really impressed the hell out of us.

[Kim WB]

I am loving this thread. Add it to this one: http://forums.egullet.org/index.php?act=ST...t=0#entry608584

and it would give any cynic faith in the human race.

I love egullet. Corny, overdone, but true.

Edited May 20, 2004 by Kim WB (log)

[Pan]

I am loving this thread. Add it to this one: http://forums.egullet.org/index.php?act=Po...0&p=608584&st=0

I'm getting a bizarre error message when I click on that link:

Sorry, an error occurred. If you are unsure on how to use a feature, or don't know why you got this error message, try looking through the help files for more information.

The error returned was:

Sorry, you do not have permission to edit that message

[Kim WB]

I hope I fixed it..it was a link to the disabilites link...I'm not particularly swift when it comes to links and such.

and, I am going to..perhaps too late, add this link about the CABIN on the "egullet is good for humanity" thought:

http://forums.egullet.org/index.php?showtopic=24363&hl=

Edited May 20, 2004 by Kim WB (log)

[shelly59]

A couple whom I am close to very recently became foster parents to a 1 1/2 year old boy. So, naturally, we took him out to his very first restauarant experience (never too young to start !) the very next day.

It was a smallish diner, nice "comfort-food" place. Our waitress walked up to us, handed us our menus, and handed my friend a handful of crackers and a few slices of cheese for the little fella..to tide him over she said.

It was such a nice, thoughtful gesture.

And we were NOT charged for it, either.

[suzilightning]

we just got back from our annual anniversary trip down the shore(new jersey for those not in this state). we had made reservations when we were down last month and were greeted with hugs and a glass of sparkling wine from the owner when we got there(only our third visit).

[srhcb]

I've spent a lot of time in bars and restaurants, both serving and being served. Since "random acts of kindness" are words I strive to live by, your question forced me to think long and hard before coming up with this reply.

The most unusual example of a restaurant staff member's extra consideration was something that happened to me many years ago. My friend Lightning was a guitar player in a local rock band. One night, after he finished playing a dance job, we had arranged to meet some girls at a local pizzeria that was a popular destination after the town's bars closed. He and I arrived somewhat late after helping to pack up the band equipment.

The restaurant's seating consisted of a row of booths along the wall opposite the entryway, several small tables in a row down the center of the dining room, and two larger round tables near the door, alongside the kitchen area, that usually wern't occupied except when the place was really busy, as it was that night.

The girls we knew were eating a pizza at the round table nearest to the door. Lightning decided to order something to eat and I was just going to have coffee. At the other round table sat a couple of older, fairly large rough looking characters who had obviously spent quite a few hours in the bars up the street. They were acting up, making the usual wise-guy remarks about long hair, clothing, suspected sexual orientation etc.

One of the girls had to work the next morning and asked me if she could get a ride home. She didn't live far away and since I wasn't eating it was no problem. While driving her home I mentioned how obnoxious the two guys at the other table had been. She told me that before I arrived they had been behaving even worse. After hearing her relate a few stories I became incensed. I dropped her off and sped back to the restaurant. I searched under the car seat for anything I could use as a weapon, but all I could come up with was pair of pliers, which I stuck in my pocket.

Back inside the other girls had finished eating and were getting ready to leave a bit earlier than they might have otherwise, no doubt in part to the unpleasant atmosphere. The fact that this now deprived Lightning and I of any chance at some pleasurable female companionship later on didn't put me in any better mood.

While Lightning ate I had a cup of coffee and tried to relax. The two clowns next to us were still trying to keep up what they considered to be a line of witty banter. They even made rude commments to Lil, the grandmotherly waitress. She was used to putting up with drunks on the night shift, and while she maintained her cheerful disposition I could tell she was noticably irritated by this particular pair. While she refilled my coffee cup I alluded to their antics and she gave me a knowing nod.

Just then one of their jackets fell off the back of the chair where it had been hanging and landed near my feet. I picked it off the floor with the toe of my boot and kicked it off to the side, making sure to leave a dirty footprint.

Now the drunks quit talking and just concentrated on glaring at us. Moments later Lil came back with our bill, and while glancing furtivly around she took a long sharply pointed metal spoon out of her apron and slipped it to me. I took out the money to cover our bill, and just as the two thugs at the next table got up to leave I handed the spoon under the table to Lightning and motioned with my head for him to follow me.

We elbowed our way between them as they went out the door, and once outside we leaned up against the front of the building. Our adversaries stod at the curb facing us. I'm an average sized guy, and I was young and in pretty good shape, but they were noticably larger than me, and from outward appearance not unfamiliar with the physical resolution of conflicts. Unfortunately, Lightning was what you might politely describe as scrawny. In a fight he would doubtless prove to be a hinderance more than anything else, but under the circumstances he was all the help I could expect. While I made what I hoped were menacing sounds clicking the pliers from under the car seat, he twirled the long pointed spoon that Lil the waitress had so kindly supplied us with.

{The owner of this pizzaria wasn't famous for being easy on his staff, and would have been loath to intercede on their behalf in a dispute with a paying customer in any case. Years later, when I worked in the bar and restaurant business myself, one thing I would not stand for was a customer harassing the waitstaff. In instances where it was a close call I would error on the side of the employee. Many times, after ejecting a customer out for abusive behavior, I paid for a ticket out of my own pocket, remembering to include a nice tip.)

[Jake]

I've spent a lot of time in bars and restaurants, both serving and being served. Since "random acts of kindness" are words I strive to live by, your question forced me to think long and hard before coming up with this reply.

The most unusual example of a restaurant staff member's extra consideration was something that happened to me many years ago. My friend Lightning was a guitar player in a local rock band. One night, after he finished playing a dance job, we had arranged to meet some girls at a local pizzeria that was a popular destination after the town's bars closed. He and I arrived somewhat late after helping to pack up the band equipment.

The restaurant's seating consisted of a row of booths along the wall opposite the entryway, several small tables in a row down the center of the dining room, and two larger round tables near the door, alongside the kitchen area, that usually wern't occupied except when the place was really busy, as it was that night.

The girls we knew were eating a pizza at the round table nearest to the door. Lightning decided to order something to eat and I was just going to have coffee. At the other round table sat a couple of older, fairly large rough looking characters who had obviously spent quite a few hours in the bars up the street. They were acting up, making the usual wise-guy remarks about long hair, clothing, suspected sexual orientation etc.

One of the girls had to work the next morning and asked me if she could get a ride home. She didn't live far away and since I wasn't eating it was no problem. While driving her home I mentioned how obnoxious the two guys at the other table had been. She told me that before I arrived they had been behaving even worse. After hearing her relate a few stories I became incensed. I dropped her off and sped back to the restaurant. I searched under the car seat for anything I could use as a weapon, but all I could come up with was pair of pliers, which I stuck in my pocket.

Back inside the other girls had finished eating and were getting ready to leave a bit earlier than they might have otherwise, no doubt in part to the unpleasant atmosphere. The fact that this now deprived Lightning and I of any chance at some pleasurable female companionship later on didn't put me in any better mood.

While Lightning ate I had a cup of coffee and tried to relax. The two clowns next to us were still trying to keep up what they considered to be a line of witty banter. They even made rude commments to Lil, the grandmotherly waitress. She was used to putting up with drunks on the night shift, and while she maintained her cheerful disposition I could tell she was noticably irritated by this particular pair. While she refilled my coffee cup I alluded to their antics and she gave me a knowing nod.

Just then one of their jackets fell off the back of the chair where it had been hanging and landed near my feet. I picked it off the floor with the toe of my boot and kicked it off to the side, making sure to leave a dirty footprint.

Now the drunks quit talking and just concentrated on glaring at us. Moments later Lil came back with our bill, and while glancing furtivly around she took a long sharply pointed metal spoon out of her apron and slipped it to me. I took out the money to cover our bill, and just as the two thugs at the next table got up to leave I handed the spoon under the table to Lightning and motioned with my head for him to follow me.

We elbowed our way between them as they went out the door, and once outside we leaned up against the front of the building. Our adversaries stod at the curb facing us. I'm an average sized guy, and I was young and in pretty good shape, but they were noticably larger than me, and from outward appearance not unfamiliar with the physical resolution of conflicts. Unfortunately, Lightning was what you might politely describe as scrawny. In a fight he would doubtless prove to be a hinderance more than anything else, but under the circumstances he was all the help I could expect. While I made what I hoped were menacing sounds clicking the pliers from under the car seat, he twirled the long pointed spoon that Lil the waitress had so kindly supplied us with.

{The owner of this pizzaria wasn't famous for being easy on his staff, and would have been loath to intercede on their behalf in a dispute with a paying customer in any case. Years later, when I worked in the bar and restaurant business myself, one thing I would not stand for was a customer harassing the waitstaff. In instances where it was a close call I would error on the side of the employee. Many times, after ejecting a customer out for abusive behavior, I paid for a ticket out of my own pocket, remembering to include a nice tip.)

Soooooo.......HOW DID IT END??????

(Yeah, even if it was a long time ago, still curious!)

[hathor]

Yeah, how did it end? and where is the random act of kindness?

[TJHarris]

Yeah, how did it end? and where is the random act of kindness?

I thought that the waitress giving him a shank (in the prison sense not the food sense) was the act of kindness.

[srhcb]

Yeah, how did it end? and where is the random act of kindness?

I thought that the waitress giving him a shank (in the prison sense not the food sense) was the act of kindness.

That was more or less the intended inference, in that it was far and beyond anything that might have been expected from either the waitress' job description or her personality.

From Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary:

Main Entry: kind·ness

Pronunciation: 'kIn(d)-n&s

Function: noun

1 : a kind deed : FAVOR

PS: The ending ot the story is colorful and interesting, although somewhat anti-climatic. It has nothing to do with food, and so rather than run the risk of being cited by the eG moniters again, I ended the story.

[chezlamere]

recently 8 of us went out to dinner (three generations of us) and we were enjoying our drinks, then our second drinks-catching up (hadn't seen each other for almost a year) didn't even notice that our meal was way late. The server informed us that they ran out of baked potatoes and had to make some up and for the inconvenience everyone would get a complimentary dessert. (only one of us was even having baked potato) . Dinner finally arrived and my son was eating his steak and potato with such gusto that he didn't notice his plate edging too close to the end of the table (he's 25 not 5 by the way). Well you quessed-it went over onto his lap. What a mess, only half done. When the server came over to enquire about the meal, we were in the middle of cleaning it all up. He brought more serviettes and informed us that he would take the entree off the bill. When he asked my son if there was anything else he might want, my son lost his appetite and said no thanks. The server surprised us with a take-out steak dinner on our departure. Said he didn't want my son to go without dinner-maybe for later. So free desserts for 8, and free half eaten dinner plus free take out full dinner - WOW i was impressed. Left a HUGE tip. My husband couldn't make this dinner, so when we all got home my son made a Very big impression on his father when he said HE BOUGHT a take-out steak dinner for him. Made megga points.

[Pan]

PS: The ending ot the story is colorful and interesting, although somewhat anti-climatic. It has nothing to do with food, and so rather than run the risk of being cited by the eG moniters again, I ended the story.

No fair! You left us all in suspense! [pouting emoticon]

[srhcb]

PS: The ending ot the story is colorful and interesting, although somewhat anti-climatic.  It has nothing to do with food, and so rather than run the risk of being cited by the eG moniters again, I ended the story.

No fair! You left us all in suspense! [pouting emoticon]

Okay, I'll bang the ending out a bit later on today.

I let you know in advance that I didn't get pummeled. In fact, it turned into a moral victory of sorts.

SB (arm twisted)(but can still type)