Food Terms We Loathe/Misuse

[Sugar Apple]

"Meld" - most often used by persons reviewing recipes on Epicurious.

I'm with those who bristle at "foodie". I was originally a stage manager and couldn't stand being called a "techie" either. Hate those cute little "ie" terms.

I also cringe at Nigella's fake, made-up adjectives.

[Beebs]

"World-famous" makes me cringe. If your dish is "world-famous," how come I've never heard of it??

"Honest" food/cooking. What does that mean anyway? Honest as opposed to dishonest food/cooking? My dad loves using this word to describe some types of cuisine. It makes me want to scream and run my head into a brick wall.

[eatenmess]

on menus any words describing what my food is going to be (or supposed to be) eg crusty bread, smooth (as in pate), creamy, crispy etc. ill be the one to determine whether or not my bread is crusty rather than stale, smooth rather than full of lumps and random bits of butter or that my bacon was crispy 5 services ago but not now, not some hopeful word on a menu trying to (and normally successfully) convince some brain dead nit wit that the food here is good.

fresh---youre not exactly going to put 'gone of sea bass' on the menu are you?

fusion---dont care, alain ducasse said in restaurant magazine that fusion is confusion, damn right. i haven't read something i agree with so strongly for quite some time.

agree with the haters on unfussy, oven baked, screamingly fresh, food porn, foodie, playful, HOMEMADE (AAAHHH), authentic (in my opinion authentic food doesnt require the word authentic so food that uses that word is merely trying to hype itself up)

these ones about 'uh my coffee is all over my laptop now after reading that' its like these people either a, actually think we believe them or b, constantly have a cup of coffee pressed against their mouths.
the **drools** gets on my tits too.


ive kind of got a little soft spot for this Grandma Cavendish's fruit cake or what have you so i have to disagree, however much aunt bessie's do to murder family cooking.

not liking "local" "organic" or "sustainable" seems nuts to me. they are factual more than anything and is something id give my two front teeth to be able to expect on menus. although some places do put the words in just to look good its still pleasing to know that at some point in their lifetime the food im about to eat has been cared for.

i have a small hatred for deconstruction thats brewing i just feel its such a fad, or at least i hope so it will go away and i can enjoy a nicely put together tiramisu (looking at you casa mia, bristol!)

YES SWISS_CHEF!!! cutting edge!!!! what edge?? shut up, bloody modern cutting edge malarke, shut UP YOU FOOLS. state of the art too. what a load of dribble/drizzle.

i quite like decadent i dont think its been overly raped by critics using it to describe every chocolate mousse they eat...yet

totally agree with tupac about the truffle thing, i cant stand truffle oil. if youre going to use something like a truffle then dont make do with some oil that pretends to be it however good it may taste, if im going to eat a carrot i want to eat a carrot not carrot extract or flavour, an actual carrot.

'tuna fish' ah yeh silly me heres me thinking tuna was a bear im so pleased that whenever i read anything about tuna written by an american (i dont want to insult anyone so dont take it to heart) it reminds me its a fish. it is the equivalent of going chicken bird, carrot vegetable, pig mammal. this would be my number 2 hatred closely behind the dumbest saying in the kitchen still heard so frequently on tv and in books......


'put your meat in a hot pan to SEAL IN THE IN JUICES' gun, head, shoot.


all this is quite alright but i do find myself sat at quite high end restaurants describing it as 'proper nice'. people who say swearing is an indication of how small your vocabulary are talking utter tripe. its a stupid enough saying on its own because by not saying words you know in a particular language its lowering your vocabulary. secondly because i cant think of any better way to describe some foods ive had than to say that they were 'fucking amazing'


im off to go drool over some food porn

 

 

 

 

 

We continue complaining about culinary terms in More Food Terms We Loathe/Misuse.

Edited December 15, 2014 by Mjx
Note added. (log)