When do you serve Thanksgiving dinner

[tmriga]

One of my relatives works as a server in a restaurant that is open on Thanksgiving Day. We wait until she gets home from work, which is anywhere between 3 and 5 PM.

Happy Thanksgiving to all those celebrating.

Theresa

[slo_ted]

We do it for dinner, but we shoot for an earlier start than is usual for us--5:30 to 6ish. I love spending the afternoon in the process of making the dinner with all the other people involved. Thanksgiving is perhaps the only day of the year when I get to cook with so many other people.

[Kouign Aman]

It varies from year to year depending on who's cooking, and any other schedule conflicts.

All the times have benefits and downsides.

But we are firmly in the camp that getting hungry later in the evening means sandwiches, and pie. And we try to make sure everyone has at least 2 meals (the main and the followup) before leaving.

[slkinsey]

I don't currently, nor have I ever worked on a farm. So having a huge meal in the middle of the afternoon has never made sense to me. We have never had Thanksgiving dinner in my family in the middle of the afternoon, nor any of the other large holiday meals.

Thanksgiving dinner (and Xmas eve dinner and Xmas dinner dinner, etc.) are all served at dinner time. Which is to say, around 7 o'clock.

[Jacquester]

My family always did our dinner in the late afternoon around 4 p.m. recently, for the last 10-15 years, we have our meals around 5-6. This give us time to hang out, go for walks, drink some mulled cider, roast some chestnuts, yell at the football games, and generally relax. By the time we're finished with dessert, everyone just plops on the couch and loosens the belt while watching another great episode of law and order or some other inane t.v.

I love thanksgiving...

Happy thanksgiving everyone

[Jaymes]

I don't currently, nor have I ever worked on a farm. So having a huge meal in the middle of the afternoon has never made sense to me. We have never had Thanksgiving dinner in my family in the middle of the afternoon, nor any of the other large holiday meals.

Thanksgiving dinner (and Xmas eve dinner and Xmas dinner dinner, etc.) are all served at dinner time. Which is to say, around 7 o'clock.

Interesting theory.

I'm not sure I get your point. I'm even a little puzzled as to your reason for posting this. You seem inexplicably irritated and annoyed about the time that others choose to have their big holiday meals.

But, speaking just for myself, having spent a good deal of time in farm country, I don't recall it being anyone's habit to sleep in, then have a big, lazy breakfast around 9 or 10am, and then go work the back forty for a couple of hours, and then stop working around 2pm or so, when there's still plenty of daylight, and head up to the farmhouse to eat a big sleep-inducing meal around 3pm or so, which basically does you in for the remainder of the workday.

The farmers that I've known rise before the sun. Have a fairly hearty pre-dawn breakfast. Head out to milk the cows or feed the chickens or work the fields. Come back to the house to have a big meal around 11-12noon, and then back out to work until sunset, whereupon they have a lighter supper before going to bed early.

Not sure how a big meal at 2 or 3 in the afternoon fits into that schedule.

But hey, the farms with which you are familiar may do things differently.

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Edited November 24, 2010 by Jaymes (log)

[andiesenji]

I was born and raised on a farm in a large, extended family which grew exponentially on holidays when relatives from "away" and friends and various dependents were welcomed for holiday dinners.

When I was a child, I was mostly underfoot but was given various tasks to keep me out of trouble but I did my bit...

Three p.m. was the time usually aimed for, but sometimes there would be something to delay things a bit - as when my dad and two of my uncles arrived home as a surprise, for Thanksgiving 1944, having been awarded furloughs for the holiday.

In all the years that I served holiday dinners, I continued this tradition.

There was no sleeping in for anyone. Feeding a lot of people, even with efficient prep ahead of time, takes enough hours that one has to get up early, make breakfast, forget about lunch and get on with things.

I always was concerned that guests be able to drive home safely, if they had any distance to go, and as many were elderly, and were not used to staying up late, this worked well for everyone.

It also allowed me to get everything cleaned up at a reasonable hour so I could get a good night's sleep before the dawning of "Black Friday" and the shopping jaunt with my kids.

[Jaymes]

There was no sleeping in for anyone. Feeding a lot of people, even with efficient prep ahead of time, takes enough hours that one has to get up early, make breakfast, forget about lunch and get on with things.

Well, in my holiday house, because I basically did it all, there was certainly no sleeping in for me. But rousting the rest of the family (especially teenagers; especially my husband) early was so much trouble that it was easier for me to just do it all.

And you're right that another good thing about getting the holiday dinner over early is so that folks that have to drive a couple of hours to get home can do that before it gets too late.

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Edited November 24, 2010 by Jaymes (log)

[Rico]

Just ... just because I have to say it even though I know you were saying it in jest - the ball is oblong, not pointy!

And late this year, because the important pointy-ball game is on at three.

[Lindacakes]

Since my parents divorced when I was still a teenager, I haven't had a regular Thanksgiving tradition in my adult life. I freelance around, sometimes hosting, sometimes being hosted, sometimes small intimate dinners, sometimes large boisterous dinners.

My secret is that I make my own turkey no matter what. Because I love turkey and I make a good one and I like real gravy. I need time to make this turkey, so I dislike showing up at anyone else's house at a time that would affect my secret bird. I do not want to be under the gun to get the stowaway in the oven before dawn.

I also like drinking on Thanksgiving. I like the drinking maybe more than the eating because everyone is friends and everyone is in a good mood and everyone doesn't have to go back to work for days. There's a feeling of abandon that is unmatched. I don't like to commence drinking before 3:00 or so.

Cocktails should last a couple of hours before you are really loose enough to sit down to the glow of a good communal meal.

I'm with the 6:00 crowd.

It's early enough that you can get in that old movie/sandwich thing I also love. That's one of the reasons why the secret bird is so masterful. One can return home with one's partner and relax with Bette Davis and yes, MIRACLE WHIP.

[slkinsey]

I don't currently, nor have I ever worked on a farm. So having a huge meal in the middle of the afternoon has never made sense to me. We have never had Thanksgiving dinner in my family in the middle of the afternoon, nor any of the other large holiday meals.

Thanksgiving dinner (and Xmas eve dinner and Xmas dinner dinner, etc.) are all served at dinner time. Which is to say, around 7 o'clock.

Interesting theory.

I'm not sure I get your point. I'm even a little puzzled as to your reason for posting this. You seem inexplicably irritated and annoyed about the time that others choose to have their big holiday meals.

It seems pretty straightforward to me. As you say yourself, it's common in American agrarian families to have the largest meal in the middle of the day. It seems to me that this has influenced the timing of this dinner. And, in my experience anyway, it is much more common for large holiday meals to be served "early" in the central parts of the country, which still maintain many customs derived from American agrarian practices. Since I don't come from a tradition that has any connection to this, eating "dinner" in mid-afternoon doesn't make much sense to me.

[Chris Amirault]

One reason many people I know eat mid-afternoon is kids: you have a 3-4 hour event together and then the kids have to be poured into car seats and beds. If it were all adults that didn't need to worry about drinking and driving, living in a city with a terrific public transit system, I'd serve dinner at "dinner time."

[lancastermike]

I don't currently, nor have I ever worked on a farm. So having a huge meal in the middle of the afternoon has never made sense to me. We have never had Thanksgiving dinner in my family in the middle of the afternoon, nor any of the other large holiday meals.

Thanksgiving dinner (and Xmas eve dinner and Xmas dinner dinner, etc.) are all served at dinner time. Which is to say, around 7 o'clock.

Interesting theory.

I'm not sure I get your point. I'm even a little puzzled as to your reason for posting this. You seem inexplicably irritated and annoyed about the time that others choose to have their big holiday meals.

It seems pretty straightforward to me. As you say yourself, it's common in American agrarian families to have the largest meal in the middle of the day. It seems to me that this has influenced the timing of this dinner. And, in my experience anyway, it is much more common for large holiday meals to be served "early" in the central parts of the country, which still maintain many customs derived from American agrarian practices. Since I don't come from a tradition that has any connection to this, eating "dinner" in mid-afternoon doesn't make much sense to me.

In the spirit of the holiday I say eat whenever you like to. Happy Thanksgiving to all and I will defer my real thoughts on this post

[slkinsey]

One reason many people I know eat mid-afternoon is kids: you have a 3-4 hour event together and then the kids have to be poured into car seats and beds. If it were all adults that didn't need to worry about drinking and driving, living in a city with a terrific public transit system, I'd serve dinner at "dinner time."

There are lots of good reasons to do large holiday dinners at various times of the day. Tradition and custom, I think, probably have a lot to do with it. But I'm sure there are practical considerations as well. My parents are both only children, so I never had those gigantic extended family meals. For Thanksgiving, our family got together with a bunch of similarly situated families (many of them academics, like mine) in a group that could easily be 50 or more, including children of all ages. Everyone drove, and this was always an evening dinner.

I should hasten to point out, since there seems to be some misunderstanding on this count, that people should eat whenever they want to eat. I'm simply saying that my traditions and experience have brought me to a place where I personally can't understand eating a large holiday dinner in the middle of the afternoon. Other people with different traditions and experiences can't understand eating a large meal in the evening. It's not a question of one time being intrinsically "better" than another.

[Jaymes]

Other people with different traditions and experiences can't understand eating a large meal in the evening.

Just to set the record straight, and speaking just for myself, I have no trouble whatsoever "understanding" why some folks prefer to eat their holiday meal in the evening.

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Edited November 24, 2010 by Jaymes (log)

[slkinsey]

Other people with different traditions and experiences can't understand eating a large meal in the evening.

Just to set the record straight, and speaking just for myself, I have no trouble whatsoever "understanding" why some folks prefer to eat their holiday meal in the evening.

Sigh. It wasn't written to convey belittlement or express a literal failure to comprehend, but rather figuratively in the same sense one might say, "I don't understand oatmeal without salt in it." Although I don't think it's particularly difficult to figure that out.

[Jaymes]

Other people with different traditions and experiences can't understand eating a large meal in the evening.

Just to set the record straight, and speaking just for myself, I have no trouble whatsoever "understanding" why some folks prefer to eat their holiday meal in the evening.

Sigh. It wasn't written to convey belittlement or express a literal failure to comprehend, but rather figuratively in the same sense one might say, "I don't understand oatmeal without salt in it." Although I don't think it's particularly difficult to figure that out.

Since it's not "particularly difficult," others are probably more capable than I "to figure that out." It seems to me, however, that all of your posts on this issue are inexplicably condescending. You seem to be saying that only Flyover Rubes eat their holiday meals in the middle of the afternoon. However, I suppose I am mistaken about that as well.

It would be interesting to do an investigation into the origins of the custom of having one's big holiday meal around 2 or 3 in the afternoon, though, rather than merely relying on your "it's only farm people" speculation. Although you could be correct, I know, for example, that when I was living in Asia (Hong Kong and the Philippines), my family always tried to have Christmas dinner early so that the servants could go home and spend the rest of the day with their families.

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Edited November 24, 2010 by Jaymes (log)

[slkinsey]

If I seem to you to be saying that "only Flyover Rubes eat their holiday meals in the middle of the afternoon," I can't really do much about that except point out that I haven't actually said anything of the sort.

As for the timing of the meal, I thought this article had some interesting things overall to say about the timing of dinner (although not specifically about Thanksgiving dinner) and seems to support my supposition that earlier dinner times are connected to agrarian culture and practices (or, more broadly, the recentness of moving away from them).

Having grown up and currently residing on the East coast but having all of my family in Texas, having lived a half-decade in Wisconsin and being married to a woman from Kansas, it's my observation that everyday dinner times are earlier in the central parts of the country than they are on the edges. I imagine -- and I am by no means the first or only person to make this suggestion -- that these earlier dinner times reflect a more recent connection to agrarian culture and practices compared to the edges where most of the older/larger urban centers are. This doesn't make anyone a rube. My in-laws in Manhattan, Kansas are every bit as sophisticated as anyone I know on the island of Manhattan where I live. But they do prefer to eat dinner several hours earlier than I would ordinarily even think of dining.

As for the hour of Thanksgiving dinner specifically... there are plenty of people out here who eat this meal in the middle of the afternoon. But there are also plenty of people who eat Thanksgiving dinner in the evening. My observation is that the balance between "early" and "late" Thanksgiving dinners shifts considerably in favor of the former as one moves into the central parts of the country. It seems reasonable to suggest that this has something to do with the fact that the customary dinner hour also trends earlier in those areas, and furthermore to suggest that this may ultimately be traced back to agrarian culture and practices. Again, I am hardly the first person to make this suggestion. Of course, earlier times wherever they may be found may also have to do with the necessities of longer driving times, or any number of other factors. Just googling around the internet, it's surprising to note how many people have said that their Thanksgiving dinner is scheduled to account for the timing of televised football games.

[lancastermike]

Just googling around the internet, it's surprising to note how many people have said that their Thanksgiving dinner is scheduled to account for the timing of televised football games.

And those folks are clearly barbarians who should be held, as your tone suggests, in contempt.

I am pretty much stunned by the suggestion that the time folks eat Thanksgiving dinner has deep sociological roots. In most cases I think the time has to do with several things with travel plans and the amount of kids involved being high up on the list.

However, what the hell do I know? I'm just an afternoon eatin' rube.

[slkinsey]

I am pretty much stunned by the suggestion that the time folks eat Thanksgiving dinner has deep sociological roots. In most cases I think the time has to do with several things with travel plans and the amount of kids involved being high up on the list.

Really? I'm shocked by the suggestion that most any aspect of a national cultural tradition like Thanksgiving Dinner doesn't have interesting sociological and historical reasons. The timing of the dinner seems like one such aspect to me. You're suggesting that it's a purely logistical consideration. Maybe so. I think it's an open question.

I'd be interested to know if an "early" family or a "late" family changed traditions from one to the other based solely upon logistical considerations (and not, for example, because the family came from different customs and chose one or the other).

[Chris Amirault]

When I was a kid (and there were serious football fans around), it was midday.

When I was in my 20s, living in Milwaukee for grad school, and eating Thanksgiving meals away from the brood back east, it was late.

When I moved back east and had a kid, it went back to midday, where it has remained.

For now.

[Jaymes]

As for the timing of the meal, I thought this article had some interesting things overall to say about the timing of dinner (although not specifically about Thanksgiving dinner) and seems to support my supposition that earlier dinner times are connected to agrarian culture and practices (or, more broadly, the recentness of moving away from them).

It's pretty much accepted common knowledge that agrarian culture lends itself to a large lunch, i.e., "dinner," around noon or even a bit earlier. As far as I'm concerned, this conversation is more about a traditional holiday dinner; i.e., Christmas or Thanksgiving, and I'd include Easter as well, which nobody, as far as I can tell, eats at 11:30 or noon, the typical hour for the traditional largest farm meal.

As you yourself indicate, your article says nothing about that, so I'm not sure that's the explanation regarding the habit of having a holiday meal around 2-4pm. And certainly doesn't explain your hard and fast rule that because you do not and have not "worked on a farm," you're not about to eat your holiday dinner before the proper dinner time of 7 o'clock.

But ah well...

As the kids say, whatever.

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Edited November 24, 2010 by Jaymes (log)

[onrushpam]

Mine varies every year...

This year, DD is running in a 10K Turkey Trot in the AM and won't get to our house until after noon. She has to work Friday (but not until the afternoon) and we have to leave early Friday morning to take 10 greyhounds from the track to an adoption group. We need time to clean up the mess and get organized for our Friday trip. So, we'll eat mid/late afternoon.

We always enjoy a fair amount of wine and beer during prep and dinner. I want my guests to have plenty of time to assimilate all that with dessert and coffee before hitting the road home. Me, I just crash on the couch! But, not this time... I have a lot of doggie paperwork to gather up for Friday morning.

Off to make gravy and rolls now...

[llc45]

Mine varies alot also. Back when more family lived within a few hours and many had to work on Friday, we generally had the meal around 2-3 pm so people could get home at a reasonable time. As more of my family moved too far to drive and started flying in for the weekend, the meal started to get later. When many of our companies started giving Fridays off, the meal moved to around 7 pm. But, now that my parents are getting older and like to be in bed early, the pendulum has started to go in reverse again. At my Dad's pleading, we will be having Thanksgiving tomorrow between 2-3 pm. He is getting so insistent about getting home early that he starts demanding pie before we have even have a chance to clean up the dishes from the meal .

Happy Thanksgiving!

[patti]

Our tradition has been 12:00 NOON. Yes, that means getting up really early on Thanksgiving morning, but that's just the way it's always been done in my family and the families I grew up with. The visiting and the football games were after the big meal (any holiday meal, not just Thanksgiving). Dessert eaten mid-afternoon, and by the time we were ready to leave, we might've eaten a small second plate of food and packed up leftovers. No one leaves without leftovers.

I envy those of you who do it later, but anytime I've tried to break this tradition, I get shot down by too many dissenting votes. OTOH, I kind of love that everybody's gone at a decent hour and I can kick back and relax.

Oh, my location is south Louisiana. I don't know if it's a regional thing.