Obscene Sandwich

[Peter the eater]

After four hours of Christmas shopping we finally made it home, tired and hungry. Once the kids were fed, I asked my wife a question . . .

PtE: So what should we have?

Wife: A sandwich.

PtE: What kind of sandwich?

Wife: A good one. With lots of stuff.

PtE: What kind of stuff?

Wife: You figure it out, something unusual. Something obscenely good.

PtE: You want an obscene sandwich?

Wife: Yes I do.

Beef tenderloin and lobster tail on toasted light rye, with port & morel "mayo", and homemade bacon chips with horseradish sauce.

[hummingbirdkiss]

ok that sandwich makes my eyes roll back!!! how amazing!!!

my most obscene sandwich pales to this and should not even be on the same page ..eggplant parmesan in 1/4 loaf of good crusty Italain ..prefering the left over garlic bread ..then smashed together and barely warmed

glass of nice merlot

I am making eggplant parm today

[johnnyd]

Peter: You are obscenely good at sandwich-making. I'm coming over for lunch.

[Octaveman]

That's it...I'm contacting the FAA, the FTC, the FDA or someone like that because I am truely offended by that picture to the point that it's got to be put in front of me for immediate inspection for um, something.

Good gawd...that looks incredible.

[Lilija]

You can't ask a question like that, then grace us with those pics...I got nothing, by comparison!

My recent obscene sandwich was on crusty Italian bread, too, but it had breaded chicken, pepperoni, prosciutto, roasted peppers and asparagus, Parmesan cheese, shaved not shredded, slices of hot pickled cherry peppers, and a small mountain of mozzarella, and some enterprising souls dipped the works into some leftover marinara. It was the leftovers from like two meals, all crammed into a loaf of bread, and toasted. Overkill? Absolutely.

[Reconstructing Dinner]

Let's see. . . I recently made Mexican Tortas with the meat from leftover rack of baby back ribs, which I heated up in mole (I make large batches and keep ice cubes of it in the freezer.). Sandwich also included avocado, cilantro, jalepeno, chipotle mayo. Not a fancy obscene sandwich, but it seemed pretty over-the-top at the time. Mmm.

RD

[Octaveman]

[Reconstructing Dinner]

OK. It's not really the rib-mole torta -- that required immediate eating; no time for pictures. I made this one with pulled pork a while back. Not quite a sloppy or sinister, but tasty nonetheless.

RD

[Peter the eater]

Heidi: Eggplant parma has big obscenity potential, especially with the bread you describe.

johnnyd: I'm back in Shad Bay after New Year's.

Octaveman: I know you're in that photo.

Lilija: breaded chicken, pepperoni, prosciutto -- together at last.

RD: I like them both.

[Kent Wang]

Good work, Peter.

I was in Berlin for a few weeks this summer. I was on a budget and found that the most delicious cheap meal was to go to KaDeWe (their super grocery) and buy bread, charcuterie, and cheese and make my own sandwich. I can't remember what each brand of charcuterie and cheese was but I assure you it was all top-notch stuff.

Salami and cheese sandwich

Liverwurst and cheese sandwich. I think the cheese was an epoisses, which combined nicely with the liverwurst into a single creamy mess of heaven.

Pate, cheese (camembert?), tongue sandwich

[jayejo]

I don't have pictures because I haven't made this in forever, but my favorite sandwich is ciabata and on one side, spread paté and on the other, brie. Top with prosciutto and broil. The types of brie and paté varied depending on what they had at the market.

And this? Is why I'm on Weight Watchers now. Yay. Joy.

[Ktepi]

Cut off one end of a "demi-baguette" from the supermarket and hollow it out.

Fill with peeled boiled shrimp.

Holding the sandwich upright, carefully pour in a sauce of melted butter, a little demiglace, Worcestershire sauce, Louisiana hot sauce, and a little whiskey.

Eat promptly, with napkins in reach.

[Genny]

Great thread! Our latest-greatest is simplicity at its finest. Behold our new Ham & Cheese Sandwich

Few ingredients: smoked ham hocks boiled for a couple hours, pull the meat off and let it cool. Fresh baked sourdough bread sliced about 1-inch thick. Guyere cheese. Coarse grain dijon mustard. Make a panini.

[Tri2Cook]

I don't have an obscene sandwich to share, I like my sandwiches simple, I'm just kinda impressed that PtE has lobster and tenderloin just lounging about the place waiting for a chance to appear on a spontaneous sandwich. That's a well stocked fridge.

[ruthcooks]

My choice for obscene: sliced roasted turkey, stuffing/dressing, lettuce, mayo and cranberry sauce on sourdough bread.

But it's a tie with a simple sandwich: BLT in tomato season.

[jackal10]

Beef on sourdough, all wood fired.

Edited December 20, 2008 by jackal10 (log)

[K8memphis]

I love all these obscene sandwiches. They sound especially luscious. A lobster tail sandwich--I'll be there.

The last memorable sandwich I had was at Taylor's in St. Helena Ca. I think it's called Taylor's QuickStop if memory serves. It's the local fast food joint. You queue up to a window and place your order. We had heirloom tomatoes with soft squishy fresh mozzarella on this exquisite cornmeal dusted roll that melted in your mouth spread with pretty green pesto. We got that a coupla times for lunch when we visited last summer. At the fast food joint. Be still my beating heart.

And I love the honey mustard at our local Holiday Ham deli. I could down shots of it. Horseradishy hot and disgustingly sweet--perfect. The sandwich itself kinda sucks.

I might have heard about this sandwich on egullet, but it was also obscene in a glaring, jaring way, calorie encrusted way. The photo is below the chart, scroll down to view.

We offered to make it for our cycling friend who weighs his food and counts calories like Scrooge weighs/ed his ha'pennies. He declined.

If the link dissolves, this is the list of goodies.

Food ~~~ Calories

Fried Mushrooms – 15 450

Bacon – 14 pieces 990

Onion rings – 18 1140

Ground Beef – 1/4 lb. 293

Corndogs – 2 540

Swiss Cheese – 4 slices 425

Provolone Cheese – 4 slices 397

Cheddar Cheese – 4 slices 455

Sliced Ham – 1/4 lb. 184

Sliced Turkey – 1/4 lb. 181

Pastrami – 1/4 lb. 394

Sliced Roast Beef – 1/4 lb. 200

Bratwurst – 1 510

Braunschweiger – 1/4 lb. 580

Wheat Bread – 1 lb. 1030

Lettuce – 1/2 head 25

Feta Cheese – 4 oz. 350

Italian Salad Dressing – 6 oz. 480

Oregeno – 50 grams 438

Salt & Pepper – 50 grams 0

Butter – 1/2 lb. 1600

Parmesan Cheese – 100 grams 465

Canola Oil – 154 Tbsp. 18,432

Total 29,559 calories

Edited December 20, 2008 by K8memphis (log)

[Octaveman]

154 Tbls of oil? That's 9.5 cups. How would he put that on the sandwich? If he's counting that for the stuff that was deep fried, those items already account for the fat calories AND not all of that oil made it to the sandwich. Oregano has 3 calories per gram. That should read 150 calories, not 450. I'm not going to go through each item BUT......

I'm calling shennanigans on the calorie counts. They are wrong. Huge sandwich though.

[K8memphis]

154 Tbls of oil?  That's 9.5 cups.  How would he put that on the sandwich?  If he's counting that for the stuff that was deep fried, those items already account for the fat calories AND not all of that oil made it to the sandwich.  Oregano has 3 calories per gram.  That should read 150 calories, not 450.  I'm not going to go through each item BUT......

I'm calling shennanigans on the calorie counts. They are wrong.  Huge sandwich though.

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For sure.

In the original post, you quickly get the idea he is not like cooking guru boy or anything. Chefs, cooks and fast food burger flippers worldwide, even mud pie makers have nothing to worry about. kwim

That's probably more of a list of the calories of the stuff he had to buy.

I'm thinking he did use and eat both sticks of butter omg.

I wish he woulda pushed it for 61 more calories.

If memory serves he deep fried the bacon?

(Memory might not serve though.)

Edited December 20, 2008 by K8memphis (log)

[hummingbirdkiss]

Beef on sourdough, all wood fired.

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I have been stuck in the house for 4 days too many now and this not only looks obscene it is almost erotic!!!

ok it is erotic

I have to get out of here before I eat my kin

[jackal10]

hmm...surely a fig is more classically erotic - press a slit through the skin to reveal the pink flesh

Maybe a whole new thread on erotic foods...

[fiftydollars]

This is by far the dirtiest sandwich picture I have. I did not make the sandwich (I'm pretty sure it's easy to guess who did), but I did get the money shot.

[Kent Wang]

They should have restaurants that serve these kinds of sandwiches. Maybe they already exist?

[K8memphis]

They should have restaurants that serve these kinds of sandwiches. Maybe they already exist?

←

Rest assured that while the back of the house might not get the tips, comfort and joy that the foh gets, they do for sure make some crazy incredible food with 'leftovers'. So while they are served in restaurants, you can't find them on any menu, probably not a lot of photos available, the less documentation the better huh. But I know you knew that.

[Ktepi]

I think virtually everything from this thread in the Pennsylvania forum qualifies:

Hoagies, Cheesesteaks, Pork Italiano, Show us whatcha got..

It's ridiculous the number of times I've stopped what I'm doing to make a sandwich -- I work at home, my lunch plans are always flexible -- because of some lust instilled by a new post to that thread.