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Overused restaurant reviewer words & metaphors

Fat Guy

By Fat Guy
in Restaurant Life

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Wilfrid

Wilfrid

Posted
Posted

Can I just say that I have read Proust in the Modern Library edition?  I just don't get enough opportunities to say that.  Thank you.

Jinmyo

Jinmyo

Posted
Posted
But do clicke moi.

"I've caught you Richardson, stuffing spit-backs in your vile maw. 'Let tomorrow's omelets go empty,' is that your fucking attitude?" -E. B. Farnum

"Behold, I teach you the ubermunch. The ubermunch is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the ubermunch shall be the meaning of the earth!" -Fritzy N.

"It's okay to like celery more than yogurt, but it's not okay to think that batter is yogurt."

Serving fine and fresh gratuitous comments since Oct 5 2001, 09:53 PM

jhlurie

jhlurie

Posted
Posted

Okay... it just occured to me that we've got all of these objections to references to "table mates" "significant others" "dining companions", etc.

So what are the reviewers supposed to call these people?  Are the reviewers supposed to pretend that they ate all of the food themselves?

The best compromise, I suppose, is to describe the food without ANY reference to who or what is eating it.

Jon Lurie, aka "jhlurie"

tommy

tommy

Posted
Posted
The best compromise, I suppose, is to describe the food without ANY reference to who or what is eating it.

why would that be the best compromise?  going out of your way to discuss an experience in an unnatural way because some might be annoyed at your word choice seems silly.  

the best compromise, clearly, is to have some sort of application that reads in the review and changes any offensive word (from your personalized list of offensive words) into a nonoffensive word, such as butterfly.  for example:

"The wench with whom i was dining had seared tuna, which offered layers upon layers of taste, and textures that danced around one's mouth like a ballet"

would become:

"The butterfly had really good tunafish"

clearly.

tommy:eats.com
Jinmyo

Jinmyo

Posted
Posted

jhlurie, I always see you as a smiley.

"I've caught you Richardson, stuffing spit-backs in your vile maw. 'Let tomorrow's omelets go empty,' is that your fucking attitude?" -E. B. Farnum

"Behold, I teach you the ubermunch. The ubermunch is the meaning of the earth. Let your will say: the ubermunch shall be the meaning of the earth!" -Fritzy N.

"It's okay to like celery more than yogurt, but it's not okay to think that batter is yogurt."

Serving fine and fresh gratuitous comments since Oct 5 2001, 09:53 PM

Mebutter

Mebutter

Posted
Posted

I just use "my friend, (fill in the name), hated the zucchini."

I always feel a little goofy introducing other people into a review but sometimes it can't be helped. So I try to get in and out of it fast and neat and get back to wherever I was going with the review.

p.s. I know the hate zucchini example is a bad one. Frankly, I don't care if "my friend, (fill in the name), hated the zucchini." I just want he/she/it to order the zucchini so I can love/hate/dismiss it without the management wondering why the weird guy at Table 45 is surrounded by four vegetable side dishes...

Bill Daley

Chicago Tribune

tommy

tommy

Posted
Posted
I just want he/she/it to order the zucchini so I can love/hate/dismiss it without the management wondering why the weird guy at Table 45 is surrounded by four vegetable side dishes...

i tell ya, that jhlurie has been known to linger at table 45 for hours on end.

tommy:eats.com
Holly Moore

Holly Moore

Posted
Posted

That's probably what I miss most from reviewing, the control I held over my tableside entourage.  Nowadays they just order what they want without begging my permission / approval.

Holly Moore

"I eat, therefore I am."

HollyEats.Com

Twitter

Mebutter

Mebutter

Posted
Posted

You could actually control them? I can't tell you how many people think they're doing me a favor eating on the paper's dime. Reporters are the worst - they always cancel at the last minute for a breaking story.

Then there's the star-envy thing - why did Lois and Jim get a 4-star and we got a 2 - or which visit do they go on - why are we always the second visit? And, of course, my favorite was Gordon - who ordered a $75 bottle of wine for the table, drank it, and then weaved off to find the maitre d' to order one more.

That I haven't killed anyone I've dined with is a miracle.

Bill Daley

Chicago Tribune

Fat Guy

Fat Guy

Posted
  • Topic Starter
Posted

During the year and a half or so that I had a generous reviewing budget, I learned how little I liked most of my friends and colleagues. Now I have no budget, no friends, and no colleagues.

Steven A. Shaw aka "Fat Guy"
Co-founder, Society for Culinary Arts & Letters, sshaw@egstaff.org
Proud signatory to the eG Ethics code
Director, New Media Studies, International Culinary Center (take my food-blogging course)

Holly Moore

Holly Moore

Posted
Posted
You could actually control them? I can't tell you how many people think they're doing me a favor eating on the paper's dime.

It is all in the approach.  Dining with a restaurant reviewer is, of course, a rare honor, not a chore.  The favor is the reviewer's, acknowledging that there is at least some merit to the opinion of those chosen to share his table.

For the first five years, it was even more of an honor, as only I got the price of my meal reimbursed and those accompanying me had the privilege of paying for their own meals.

Holly Moore

"I eat, therefore I am."

HollyEats.Com

Twitter

cabrales

cabrales

Posted
Posted
During the year and a half or so that I had a generous reviewing budget, I learned how little I liked most of my friends and colleagues. Now I have no budget, no friends, and no colleagues.

Steven -- You have our community (incl. tommy, of course).  :wink:

Tonyfinch

Tonyfinch

Posted
Posted
So what are the reviewers supposed to call these people?  Are the reviewers supposed to pretend that they ate all of the food themselves?

How about "The Pig?"

  • 7 months later...
ngatti

ngatti

Posted
Posted

Yeah it's Sunday night and having no life, I'm sittin' here surfin' the Gullet and came across this thread.

Let me add the word that sends me screaming in search of razors ( in order to open a vein):

TOOTHSOME! := (:gak: :barf: :bloody awful:)

A new one which I at first thought made-up, but after checking my Webster's New International (2nd ed, unabridged, 1952), found it listed, was:

PLENTEOUS! :toothsome:

Nick

maggiethecat

maggiethecat

Posted
Posted
Yeah it's Sunday night and having no life, I'm sittin' here surfin' the Gullet and came across this thread.

Let me add the word that sends me screaming in search of razors ( in order to open a vein):

TOOTHSOME! :gak: :barf: :bloody awful:

You are too right. Barferooni!

(And apparently I have no Sunday night life either, because here I am!)

Especially because my mother only uses "toothsome" to describea Hot Guy.

As in, "Tommy's sooooo Toothsome!"

Margaret McArthur

"Take it easy, but take it."

Studs Terkel

1912-2008

A sensational tennis blog from freakyfrites

margaretmcarthur.com

ngatti

ngatti

Posted
Posted

I'm jes' not goin there :laugh:

eGullet and the 'cult of Tommy' again rearing its head.

I'd like to see a stat reflecting the percentage of the 150,000 posts that contain or reference "Tommy". Just curious. Betcha it's pretty beaucoups.

Nick

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