What Do You Find Annoying in Dining Companions?

[lxt]

There are general rules and perceptions of etiquette (not necessarily dining), which over time evolved and became quite simplified, though still highly regarded among civilized diners and individuals. I can tolerate uninteresting and grouchy companions, less so loud and offensive buffoons demanding my attention, but I find it unacceptable and quite annoying when my dining companion finds it appropriate to be a half-hour late for a scheduled lunch for no apparent reason, and I don’t find myself entertained watching him retrieve and devour food he accidentally brushed to the floor.

Though I realize that I may never be fortunate enough to lunch with the next Balzac, who was known for his questionable dining manners, I’d rather settle for reading his works, which are much more elegant and engaging. The circus, on the other hand, will satisfy my other necessities.

Some people, however, find such behavior amusing.

[lxt]

i was thinking more along the lines of aristotle, attila the hun, confucius, catherine the great, thomas jefferson, rasputin, hitler, ghandi, jimmy carter, carl rove-just to name a few-but a "fantasy gulleteer" list would be cool too!

Not to spoil your appetite, but the idea of dining with Rasputin should not be in the least entertaining. Rasputin was known for his overpowering smell from bathing rarely and his manners never progressed beyond eating with his fingers. His “pets,” or shall I say most passionate devotees, didn’t seem to object cleansing his hands by licking his fingers.

[Jason Perlow]

i was thinking more along the lines of aristotle, attila the hun, confucius, catherine the great, thomas jefferson, rasputin, hitler, ghandi, jimmy carter, carl rove-just to name a few-but a "fantasy gulleteer" list would be cool too!

Not to spoil your appetite, but the idea of dining with Rasputin should not be in the least entertaining. Rasputin was known for his overpowering smell from bathing rarely and his manners never progressed beyond eating with his fingers. His “pets,” or shall I say most passionate devotees, didn’t seem to object cleansing his hands by licking his fingers.

That sounds like some of the frat boys I used to know in college.

[Varmint]

Another thing that annoys me are people who figure out the check to the penny because they don't want to pay any more than what their portion of the bill came to.  Some even take out calculators.  Now, this isn't a fatal flaw.  But, I find that level of cheapness to be irritating.

I don't mind the calculators. I'd rather find out exactly what I have to pay rather than to pay for my share plus some more because someone was an idiot (or cheap) and didn't leave enough for their share of the tax and/or tip.

I don't see it as being cheap, necessarily. I like to put a positive spin on it and think it's only someone being anal retentitve.

When someone does that, I ask them to calculate everyone's contribution. That makes the tip issue a bit easier to handle. Plus, it embarrasses the hell out of the geek.

[ivan]

i was thinking more along the lines of aristotle, attila the hun, confucius, catherine the great, thomas jefferson, rasputin, hitler, ghandi, jimmy carter, carl rove-just to name a few-but a "fantasy gulleteer" list would be cool too!

Not to spoil your appetite, but the idea of dining with Rasputin should not be in the least entertaining. Rasputin was known for his overpowering smell from bathing rarely and his manners never progressed beyond eating with his fingers. His “pets,” or shall I say most passionate devotees, didn’t seem to object cleansing his hands by licking his fingers.

That sounds like some of the frat boys I used to know in college.

They licked your fingers?

[misstenacity]

The tipping issue reminds me of a gender-stereotype joke:

Q: How are a table of men and a table of women different when eating lunch at a restaurant?

A: When the men's bill arrives, each of them will toss down a $20 bill and refuse to take change. When the women's bill arrives..... the purses open up, and out come the calculators.

[disclaimer.... I have known *some* guys like this, but the women's example fits my female relatives to a T.]

*grin*

Miss Tenacity

[tsquare]

The tipping issue reminds me of a gender-stereotype joke:

Q: How are a table of men and a table of women different when eating lunch at a restaurant?

A:  When the men's bill arrives, each of them will toss down a $20 bill and refuse to take change.  When the women's bill arrives..... the purses open up, and out come the calculators.

[disclaimer.... I have known *some* guys like this, but the women's example fits my female relatives to a T.]

*grin*

Miss Tenacity

Hmm, what happens when the amount he owes for lunch exceeds the $20?(!)

[ivan]

The tipping issue reminds me of a gender-stereotype joke:

Q: How are a table of men and a table of women different when eating lunch at a restaurant?

A:  When the men's bill arrives, each of them will toss down a $20 bill and refuse to take change.  When the women's bill arrives..... the purses open up, and out come the calculators.

[disclaimer.... I have known *some* guys like this, but the women's example fits my female relatives to a T.]

*grin*

Miss Tenacity

Hmm, what happens when the amount he owes for lunch exceeds the $20?(!)

A-HA! That's our secret men's loophole!

You should've seen everyone's faces when I tried that one out at the French Laundry.

[Toliver]

I have a friend who can't make a decision to save her life. She doesn't know what to order even if she's been at the restaurant numerous times (so she's familiar with what they have). We always let her go last when the waitstaff takes the order for the table and then when it's finally her turn, it's like pulling teeth: (she asks to herself outloud) "Should I have the garlic toast or the muffin?"...(again, asking herself outloud) "Am I in the mood for the chicken this time or should I try the salmon?" Meanwhile, the waiter/waitress, who has 10 other tables to deal with, has to patiently wait for the hemming and hawing from this woman to conclude before they can put the order in.

It happens every time. Yeesh.

[browniebaker]

Another annoyance: the acquaintance who, at dim sum where the dishes were for sharing, touched her saliva-coated chopstick ends to all the food, picking it over, before selecting the items that she wanted. Eewww. I didn't eat very much that time.

I was taught to use the butt-end of my chopsticks to serve myself from communal plates if no utensils are provided. Does anyone else do that?

Oh, totally! That's the proper way. Everyone else I know knows to flip the chopsticks over. This woman who contaminated all the food is the only person I have met who has been so oblivious.

[misstenacity]

The tipping issue reminds me of a gender-stereotype joke:

Q: How are a table of men and a table of women different when eating lunch at a restaurant?

A:  When the men's bill arrives, each of them will toss down a $20 bill and refuse to take change.  When the women's bill arrives..... the purses open up, and out come the calculators.

[disclaimer.... I have known *some* guys like this, but the women's example fits my female relatives to a T.]

*grin*

Miss Tenacity

Hmm, what happens when the amount he owes for lunch exceeds the $20?(!)

Hehe - I first heard the joke during a time frame in my life when paying $20 for *dinner* would have been over the top. I always pictured 4 guys at a corporate deli all having $6.99 soup/sandwich combos.

Miss Tenacity

http://tenacity.net

[bergerka]

If Charlie spotted any of the rest of us eating any sort of meat, he would make loud comments:

"Ugh. That's dead."

"You are eating decomposing flesh -- just think what that's doing to you."

"That meat is going to rot inside you, and you will rot with it."

AUGH! AUUUUUUUUGH! My younger brother was (mercifully briefly) engaged to a young lady who, upon the arrival of the waiter/waitress, would LOUDLY announce "I don't eat anything with a face." This HAD to be for the benefit of whoever she was dining with, as I'm sure the waitstaff didn't give a damn that she was a vegetarian, as long as she paid her bill. She loved to lecture on the virtues of eschewing animal flesh, too. I used to really tick her off by quoting slkinsey's favorite question on the subject: "If God didn't want us to eat animals, why did he make them out of meat?"

It finally got to the point where I was so irked that the next time she said it (ideally, in front of my parents), I planned to say "Really? You won't eat anything with a face? But...my poor brother...what a damper that must put on your sex life!"

Fortunately, she dumped him before I got around to it, since it probably wasn't all that funny and would just have embarrassed my bro.

I understand she's now a raw foodist.

In the meantime, bro's new girlfriend has food issues of her own (so does he), but is perfectly happy to just eat what she eats and let the rest of us do the same in peace.

K

[tirgoddess]

I actually enjoy hearing pet peeves on all sorts of subjects. It causes me to reflect on my own behavior and experiences, calling attention to things I might do or say that could be perceived as annoying to others to which I can decide to modify my behavior or mannerisims in order to be a more pleasant person to be around. (Sorry for the run on sentence.)

That being said, my worst pet peeve when dining is loud chewing, food in mouth sounds.

[Carolyn Tillie]

I'm big into sharing and thank goodness, most foodie people are accomodating in sharing what they get (more tastes for everyone!). My S.O. and I always debate the menu to make sure we both order enough complimentary items so we get the ultimate tastes.

However, the guy I dated just previously to Shawn was notorious in NOT wanting to share diddly. So much so that, knowing my aversion to ultra-spicy food, would deliberately order the spiciest dish on the menu just to keep me from having a taste.

Sad, huh?

[Shawn]

I have an aunt who is a very picky eater, but a restaurant meal is not complete without her letting everyone know very loudly about her dislikes. Even though she orders virtually the same bland things every time, she will grill the servers in great detail about the specials, making them describe each nuance of the dish at length, sometimes having to run into the kitchen and check on the answer. After she has run them ragged, she will then shriek, "Yuck! I hate that! That sounds disgusting!" so everyone within ten miles can hear, and go ahead and order some plain grilled salmon or steak. She is in her 70's now, but has been doing this forever.

[tryska]

That being said, my worst pet peeve when dining is loud chewing, food in mouth sounds.

oh god - amen sister!

and that doesn't have to be in a restaurant - i want to throttle my roommate everytime i here she eats. and my nerves fray even more when it's something like ohhh..chips and salsa.

i've almost cured her of talkign with her mouthful. i find it hard to imagine she was raised by wolves, but she does hold her spoon like a truckdriver, so maybe she was. *shrugs*

[Toliver]

I'm big into sharing and thank goodness, most foodie people are accomodating in sharing what they get (more tastes for everyone!). My S.O. and I always debate the menu to make sure we both order enough complimentary items so we get the ultimate tastes.

However, the guy I dated just previously to Shawn was notorious in NOT wanting to share diddly. So much so that, knowing my aversion to ultra-spicy food, would deliberately order the spiciest dish on the menu just to keep me from having a taste.

Sad, huh?

This doesn't make sense, unless you've made it clear from the get-go that everyone is supposed to share food.

It's nice that you like to share but I happen to like spicy food, as well. If I am dining out with a group, they can order whatever they want and share whatever they want, but I'm still ordering the spicy food because I like it that way. If you can't eat it and are disappointed that you can't share it, don't take it out on me. I will happily share my spicy food with anyone at the table who likes spicy food, but do you really want me to order the oatmeal just because you can't eat my spicy machaca? Think again.

[megaira]

I hate the mouth noises too...and probably am way over the line of oversensitive about it. It doesn't even have to be a noisy eater, but if everything is quiet and that's what I'm hearing, I'm sitting there going crosseyed trying to not get up and leave. If the person is noisy in the sense they're making "mm mm" noises, even worse! I have to have some sort of background noise on - music, tv, a fan, something, anything.

Hub: "what, like you don't make noises?" me: "yeah, but, they're...mine."

I think during my years waitressing, I must have been subliminally hearing all those mouths chewing, slurping, and grinding away at their food under the restaurant noise and music. It must have worn me down.

It's the same way with the animals, too... for some reason horses don't bother me, but the dog, my god, she's like a pig at a trough. SHLURP! crunch crunch crunch...SHRLUP SHLURP! SHLURP! I have to walk out of the room when I feed her.

[sherribabee]

I hate the mouth noises too...and probably am way over the line of oversensitive about it.  It doesn't even have to be a noisy eater, but if everything is quiet and that's what I'm hearing,  I'm sitting there going crosseyed trying to not get up and leave.  If the person is noisy in the sense they're making "mm mm" noises, even worse!  I have to have some sort of background noise on - music, tv, a fan, something, anything.

Hub: "what, like you don't make noises?" me: "yeah, but, they're...mine."

I think during my years waitressing, I must have been subliminally hearing all those mouths chewing, slurping, and grinding away at their food under the restaurant noise and music.  It must have worn me down. 

It's the same way with the animals, too... for some reason horses don't bother me, but the dog, my god, she's like a pig at a trough. SHLURP! crunch crunch crunch...SHRLUP SHLURP! SHLURP!  I have to walk out of the room when I feed her. 

Oh, I am the SAME way.

Over the summer, we had an intern who sat 2 cubicles away from me. She got into the habit of eating chips at her desk every afternoon. And she was no quiet chewer. It all started with a few instant messages to nearby coworkers: "Can you hear that?" "Yes! So annoying." and so forth.

I finally got to the point where I became so preoccupied with the annoying noise, that I couldn't concentrate on my work. I was literally sitting there fuming at my desk and cursing her and her loud mastication. I finally decided I couldn't take it anymmore and walked over and told her that our company frowns upon eating at the desk (not true) and that she would have to go into the kitchen to eat her chips from now on.

All was well after that for about a day...then she started wearing a charm bracelet with tiny jingle bells on it. All day...tinkletinlketinkletinkletinkle...and i won't even talk about the time she clipped her nails at the desk...

[megaira]

Mouth noises are right up there with noisy neighbor sex. The more you try to ignore them, the louder they get.

I finally decided I couldn't take it anymmore and walked over and told her that our company frowns upon eating at the desk (not true) and that she would have to go into the kitchen to eat her chips from now on.

Somewhere, on a work related message board, she's complaining about the mean girl at work who bitched her out for eating at her desk. "I really have no idea what her problem is...one day I was just sitting there having a snack..."

[mighty quinn]

My goodness, it's brutal out there. Reminds me why I choose dining venues that preclude public mastication, irrelevant commentary and copious menu choices. Having said that, it annoys the hell out of me when the guy in front of me in the drive-through orders a Big Mac with no cheese.

As I read that post, I totally misread "mastication".

that mis-read might be a little annoying during a meal as well!

[mighty quinn]

Not to spoil your appetite, but the idea of dining with Rasputin should not be in the least entertaining.  Rasputin was known for his overpowering smell from bathing rarely and his manners never progressed beyond eating with his fingers.  His “pets,” or shall I say most passionate devotees, didn’t seem to object cleansing his hands by licking his fingers.

hey-wait a minute but i think that i dated him (or maybe it was his evil twin)

[sherribabee]

Mouth noises are right up there with noisy neighbor sex.  The more you try to ignore them, the louder they get.

I finally decided I couldn't take it anymmore and walked over and told her that our company frowns upon eating at the desk (not true) and that she would have to go into the kitchen to eat her chips from now on.

Somewhere, on a work related message board, she's complaining about the mean girl at work who bitched her out for eating at her desk. "I really have no idea what her problem is...one day I was just sitting there having a snack..."

Ah well. At least I got my way!

Now, if I could just find a way to keep the company from ordering anymroe clickety pens. The girl next to me can't walk away from her desk without clickety pen in hand and she clicks furiously as she walks around the office. But at least she doesn't chew loudly.

Oh, I have dining annoyance...folks who have absolutely no table manners whatsoever. I recently had dinner with a guy who never put a napkin in his lap, licked his knife, demonstrated his Kentucky hand grip on his fork, drug his finger through the sauce on his plate to taste it, and then again later to make sure he got all the sauce off the plate. I was absolutely mortified. Weird thing is, he was otherwise quite refined. He was like the Rainman of eating.

[tryska]

He was like the Rainman of eating.

*lmao* at this!

i know so many people like this....that come from good homes too. it's so puzzling to me.

[megaira]

On a date, a guy ordered Fettuccini. Stuck a forkful in his mouth and proceeded to lean over the plate, bite off the ends and let them fall from his mouth back to the plate. Not even the one strand spaghetti-slurp. It looked like he was spitting his food out every time he took a bite (well, I guess he technically was). I wanted to sink under the table and die.

To make matters worse, we happened to be in a restaurant in the small town where I grew up...right next to my old high school. The server had been in my art class, my parents were 3 tables over and other people I knew were wandering in and out.