Potlucks – overrated?

[mskerr]

Hey all-

I remember reading Gabrielle Hamilton's "Blood, Bones, and Butter" and being a wee bit shocked when she took aim at potlucks... but it also made lots of sense. I lent the book to a friend, whose sister immediately claimed it, so I don't have the exact quote on me, but I found this through Google:

"The author, Gabrielle Hamilton, humorously expresses her distaste for a "potluck" by calling them "soul-deadening" and she says you often end up with seven variations of the same dish.  She further says, "And even the one guest who was thoughtful enough to prepare something expensive, complex, and warm - like curried shrimp- even that person has no idea how to cook for a potluck, and so eighteen people stand around the little quart container of the only dish that has any protein and any flavor and try to get a tablespoon before it is all gone.""

What do you all think? Potlucks were all the rage at my college a few years ago - both professors and students would hold them regularly - and while I harbor some nostalgia for them, Ms. Hamilton did make me wonder if maybe they are a bit over-rated and haphazard in actual execution? Or is there a slightly more organized way to throw a potluck? Perhaps it helps when the potluck participants are not on bare-bones students' budgets, nor overwhelmingly on alternative diets, as was the case at my school?

[Emily_R]

I prefer potlucks where the host provides the main protein, and guests provide sides and desserts. I was just at a fantastic potluck over labor day weekend that worked this way -- the hosts provided grilled chicken and sausage, and cupcakes for dessert. The guests, many of whom are good cooks, provided a really amazing array of super delicious sides -- it was one of the best meals I've had at a party in a while. That said, I think the quality of the attendee makes a huge difference on the quality of a potluck. If you are inviting people who love food, great. If you're inviting people who eat frozen dinners at home, not good at all.

[Pierogi]

Totally depends upon what you want/expect out of the potluck, doesn't it, and the type of people invited. As you pointed out, if you invite, or are invited to, a group with a lot of people on tight budgets, with immature palates, or who are not into food (and trust me, I have plenty of friends with the philosophy that "food is just something to fill you up"), that's what you're going to get. And you shouldn't be surprised, nor disappointed. If you appreciate THE PEOPLE, and the company, you should go, take something low impact but still good (crostini/bruschetta is a good out) and enjoy the event. This crowd is not going to dig foie gras topped with summer truffles, so don't waste your time/money giving it to them. Slap on a smile and enjoy the plain wrap Ranch dip and pre-cut celery and faux baby carrots. If you like their company. If you don't, politely beg off and send regrets.

The amount of money spent is irrelevant. As I said, you can make some amazing things with some over-the-hill bread, a good tomato or two, some herbs, some decent vinegar, S&P and some olive oil. But with the Velveeta nacho crowd, even that will be exotic, and the effort wasted.

As with anything else, know your audience. Don't tell raunchy jokes to your 90-year old Granma's bridge club, unless Granma has a bawdy sense of humor. Don't feed micro greens to people whose idea of gour-may is Laughing Cow cheese.

If the latter offends your food sensibilities, find a new group of people to hang out with. Or adjust to theirs for the time you spend with them.

[mskerr]

I prefer potlucks where the host provides the main protein, and guests provide sides and desserts. I was just at a fantastic potluck over labor day weekend that worked this way -- the hosts provided grilled chicken and sausage, and cupcakes for dessert. The guests, many of whom are good cooks, provided a really amazing array of super delicious sides -- it was one of the best meals I've had at a party in a while. That said, I think the quality of the attendee makes a huge difference on the quality of a potluck. If you are inviting people who love food, great. If you're inviting people who eat frozen dinners at home, not good at all.

That sounds like a good idea, guests bringing sides and desserts... as well as the quality of the guests. I remember in college, one of my housemates brought his homemade kimchi to a potluck. When he was complimented on it, he said "Thanks! I dumpster-dived the cabbage for it myself!" As you can imagine, the forks pretty much dropped there.

Edited for spelling.

Edited September 10, 2012 by mskerr (log)

[mskerr]

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The amount of money spent is irrelevant. As I said, you can make some amazing things with some over-the-hill bread, a good tomato or two, some herbs, some decent vinegar, S&P and some olive oil. But with the Velveeta nacho crowd, even that will be exotic, and the effort wasted.

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Totally agreed. I am a strong believer that the amount a meal costs has no direct correlation to how tasty it is, and all my favorite meals are humble. BUT, there is quite a difference between a budget meal I make nowadays, vs. one of my budget meals in college.

[Pierogi]

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The amount of money spent is irrelevant. As I said, you can make some amazing things with some over-the-hill bread, a good tomato or two, some herbs, some decent vinegar, S&P and some olive oil. But with the Velveeta nacho crowd, even that will be exotic, and the effort wasted.

.

Totally agreed. I am a strong believer that the amount a meal costs has no direct correlation to how tasty it is, and all my favorite meals are humble. BUT, there is quite a difference between a budget meal I make nowadays, vs. one of my budget meals in college.

Well then it boils down to the food sensibilities of the other participants, doesn't it, and what their other qualities mean to you.

If you value them as people, you put up with the Velveeta nachos. If you don't well, that's your option on what to do next.

Me, if the people I cared about fed me cat food, I'd shut up and spread it on a Triscuit.

[mskerr]

Good on ya! I'm not stressed out about potlucks, and they've never caused a single problem in life, as far as I know. I'm just wondering if they might not be the best way to go about having a party as I get older, knowing the sort of dishes I used to throw together as a college student... I would like to up the ante for myself a little bit. I should point out, this was at Hippie Central College, and I didn't know how to boil an egg back then, so use your imagination freely as to what I cooked.

And my housemate that made the dumpster-dived kimchi? If you shared a house with him and 3 or 5 other people, with very thin walls and little privacy... You wouldn't want his dumpster- dived kimchi anyway. Cat food on a triscuit sounds great, cheers! Or, obviously, anything made by my friends.

Edited bc Autocomplete is too assertive.

Edited September 10, 2012 by mskerr (log)

[SylviaLovegren]

One of the joys of potlucks is being able to have foods I'd never, ever, make or buy. If there are marshmallows involved, all the better!

Nevertheless, I have a few potluck standards that are inexpensive, protein-filled, and good, usually involving beans and rice, cheese, or eggs. That way I know there will be at least one big, hearty, filling dish that I can eat in the event that everyone else brings lettuce salads (which happened at one potluck I attended).

[dcarch]

My only complain about potluck is that you always end up with huge quantities of leftovers and wasted food.

People don't seem to understand that mathematically, you only need to bring enough food for one person.

dcarch

Edited September 10, 2012 by dcarch (log)

[munchymom]

One of the joys of potlucks is being able to have foods I'd never, ever, make or buy. If there are marshmallows involved, all the better!

Totally. I have a secret love for those church-supper casseroles that involve canned cream of mushroom soup and cornflakes on the top. I'd never make one (in this house nobody but me would eat it) so potlucks are my only source.

[gfweb]

This is going to make me sound like a horrible person...

Pot lucks,uggh. They are nice for fellowship, but in our circle, horrible for eating. Do people actually eat the stuff at home that they bring? Rice-a-Roni with Jello etc., fried catfish with velveeta

And the sanitary standards are lax. The same behavior that makes buffets gross goes on at pot lucks. And cold things get warm...and hot things cool off.

And while we're at it, don't leave your serving dish for me to clean and then find a way to return to you. It's like camping..."pack-in, pack-out" damnit.

When we host one, I make two mains and a salad of some sort so I know that there'll be something safe.

As Pierogi said, its about the friends and not the food.

And I'd add that beer covers a multitude of sins.

Edited September 10, 2012 by gfweb (log)

[Emily_R]

I will say, that while I'm fine with potlucks for big crowds (the one I went to recently was probably nearly 40 people), I really resent them for small dinner parties. If there are 8 or fewer people, and you're going to invite me for dinner, I don't think I should be required to cook for the pleasure of coming to your house to enjoy your company!

[Mr Holloway]

We were just at a family event that was pot luck(all fantastic cooks)

Came across an olive salad(green,black,garlic,feta) that I had never seen before....AMAZING!!!!

And all the desserts were outstanding

So I am all for pot luck dinners

Shane

[carlux]

My most recent experience of potluck is what we call in France and 'auberge espanol.' Same idea, everyone brings soemthing. Doesn't seem to be a problem with amount or variety, and as it's our local canoe club that sponsors it, we sit by the Dordogne river and eat and drink - sublime. One of many times in the 18 years we've been here that I feel I'm in a French film. And the nice thing is that it is so much more informal than most French meals, where there are usually two starters, mains, salad/cheese, dessert. Not that I object to that, but the relaxed atmosphere of a potluck is a welcome change.

[Jaymes]

And while we're at it, don't leave your serving dish for me to clean and then find a way to return to you. It's like camping..."pack-in, pack-out" damnit.

I'm ready for this one. I always have some handy aids ready that I immediately press into service as the situation requires: serving dish, tupperware containers, aluminum foil.

Them: "Oh, I'll just leave that because we've got to go home early and everybody is still eating it." Me: "I've got a serving dish right here that I can put it into so you can take your dish."

Them: "Oh, I'll just leave that because I'm not sure how I'm going to get it home." Me: "I've got some foil right here, so I'll just cover it so you can take your dish."

Them: "Oh, I'll just leave that because another guest said she'd like to take some home." Me: "I've got a tupperware container right here that we can put hers into so you can take your dish."

Seriously, you just have to be fast on your feet to avoid getting stuck with the dish.

And I'll admit that the few times during the years that I have been stuck with the dish, I just wash it and put it in my cabinet and wait for the owner to retrieve it. I'll call her once or twice, or maybe even three times, to remind her, but I'll do no more than that. I'm not going to track you down, or try to figure out when it's convenient for you for me to haul it over to your house. You brought it, you left it, it's your responsibility to come and get it if you want it.

If years pass and you haven't, or if either you or I move away (and that's happened more than once), it's mine.

I still have a lovely hand-painted Danish Christmas platter from fifteen years ago.

Thanks, Jan, wherever you are.

.

Edited September 10, 2012 by Jaymes (log)

[eternal]

Agreed. Potlucks are terrible for food. I don't like them. It's the buffet problem - a bunch of random, mediocre food on your plate. I'd much rather just have three or four really good items. I get the community aspect of it and it is a thoughtful attempt but I just don't like them.

[mskerr]

I think the best communal meals I've been to were spontaneous BBQs in the antipodes, where everyone brings one of those bargain meat packs with a few pounds of chicken wings or beef or lamb, and/or some cheap beers, and the host puts out a loaf of white bread, margarine, and steak and tomato sauces. Maybe a pavlova too if you're lucky! Nice and simple. And people love hosting them because they usually end up with a few pound of leftovers to eat the next day.

[Beebs]

Even the crummiest potluck is good if the company is good....and if the booze is plentiful!

But that aside, I generally don't mind them. If I know the food will be crummy, I'll eat beforehand (or afterwards, when I get home). The best potlucks I've attended are well-organized (where people are assigned an appetizer, main, side, or dessert (so you don't end up with four mayonaise-y spinach dips and one tray of brownies), fewer people (no more than 20 ppl), and have a passing interest in food and preparing it (the folks who don't should just be asked to bring drinks or paper plates).

[Panaderia Canadiense]

With my circle of friends, food quality is never an issue, and I love potlucks both at my own home and in the homes of others. There's a quality of mutual sharing that's totally missing in more formal dining, and they're so relaxed that nobody ever stresses (well, at least not once we get to the venue!) We're also such seasoned potluckers that the host has a list of things (general categories) and crosses them off as people RSVP with their dishes, and that tiny organizational step saves us from 7 versions of the same dish.

[heidih]

In a culturally enormously diverse city like Los Angeles potlucks have been the introduction to new cuisines for many people based on anecdotal "research". You didn't know about lumpia or Vietnamese fresh spring rolls until a co-worker brought them to a potluck for example. Heck I have even heard of menudo introductions that went well. As noted above it is helpful if folks sign up in a category so the range of dishes it not all salads or desserts. Even then it can be educational. I do not personally entertain that way but I look at it as an adventure when invited.

[janeer]

With my circle of friends, food quality is never an issue, and I love potlucks both at my own home and in the homes of others. There's a quality of mutual sharing that's totally missing in more formal dining, and they're so relaxed that nobody ever stresses (well, at least not once we get to the venue!) We're also such seasoned potluckers that the host has a list of things (general categories) and crosses them off as people RSVP with their dishes, and that tiny organizational step saves us from 7 versions of the same dish.

Gotta agree. I have been to fabulous potlucks. Good potlucks are well-managed, ensuring a good balance. Themed potlucks can be particularly nice. Since I love to graze, if the food is good, a pot luck can be both fun and delicious. Of course, need to have plenty of oven/reheating space and refrigerator space--the whole thing needs to be organized.

Honestly, even when I go to a potluck where I expect more of a mix of quality, I bring something good so I have something good to eat...and usually find at least one or two other things. I've discovered one or two interesting dishes at pot lucks.

[Norm Matthews]

I have a friend who built a castle in his back yard (4 acre back yard) complete with turrets, flags, cannons, drawbridge and moat. A couple times a year he invites a hundred or so people for shashlick-grilled, skewered lamb and he has several coolers with beer and soft drinks. Many of the guests bring something. It is all spontaneous. There are a wide variety of people from young kids just out of school, some with infant children- to wealthy- to frugal- to people who retired a decade or more ago. They are doctors, lawyers, accountants, teachers, firemen, shop keepers, constructions workers, carpenters, insurance agents, politicians, salesmen, etc. It is fun to watch what they bring. There is one couple that always brings a big bag of pretzels. One always brings a cake from the bakery at the store, another a box of giblets from the deli counter. One person always brings beanie weenies in bbq sauce and grape jelly melted in. One always brings Scotch eggs. Another potato salad, brownies, veggie trays with dips, etc. A fewpeople bring something different every time. Thankfully some don't bring anything because if 100 people brought food for 100, there would be 100 entrees and lots of left overs.

One couple bring a box of wine then stand around it like they are guarding it while they drink from it with plastic stemware. All kinds of people and all kinds of responses to pot luck . it is a cross section of small town in the midwest.

Edited September 14, 2012 by Norm Matthews (log)

[rancho_gordo]

In general I hate potlucks. I can see if it's an odd collection of people, like a church or political group, or PTAs but it drives me insane when a friend will declare a BBQ and then ask you to "bring something for the grill". I host a lot and love having my guests enjoy themselves. I see potlucks as a way for people who should be hosting to get out of it. Once a year, bite the bullet and make your friends feel welcome, important and like guests. Of course some people love to help and will offer to bring something, and most bring at least a bottle of wine (although really this is supposed to be a gift for the host) but guests shouldn't be subsidizing your social obligations.

I'm probably alone in this. And I don't get invited to many potlucks!

[Emily_R]

Rancho_Gordo -- YES YES YES on how much I hate it when people invite me to a BBQ and ask me to bring something to grill. HATE.

[Norm Matthews]

I have invited people and said, just bring yourself. Nothing else yet they bring something anyway and it usually does not go with the meal I've planned. One couple- the one I mentioned above- always brings a bag of pretzels. If I have an Asian theme dinner and someone brings apple pie, that makes me crazy. Especially if it came ready made from the grocery store bakery... still in the box. i already have a dessert planned.

However i don't mind when someone else says bring something. When the pretzel couple asked me to bring something, I brought a big bag of pretzels. They seemed upset.

When someone asks me to bring something to grill, I bring marinated chicken wings. It's their grill. Let them clean it up.

Edited September 14, 2012 by Norm Matthews (log)