Phone answering at meal time

[bloviatrix]

Like Tommy and FG, we basically only answer the phone when we're in the goddam mood. This means we won't answer during meal-times, tv watching, and even book reading. Inevitably my mother always calls when The Sopranos are on, I swear she does it purposely. There's an exception though. Blovie has a home office, so if his office phone rings, he will pick-up. This doesn't happen often, but he does work with people on the west coast who forget about the time difference.

But the whole answering the phone at dinner thing is a frequent topic with us because of my mom. The woman is a slave to the phone. She can't let a ringing phone ring with out answering. This is even the case on the sabbath, when you're not supposed to answer phones. For the last 35 plus years, every Friday night, my mom has gotten a call from her friend Selma. The call always comes towards the end of dinner. And my mom always takes the call. For some reason she doesn't feel she can ask Selma not to call on friday. It pisses all of us off.

Edited December 30, 2003 by bloviatrix (log)

[tommy]

i can't imagine not answering the door, unless i'm asleep. i guess i don't have many random strangers knocking on it.

[Pan]

I'm surprised at the number of people in this thread who sound like they regularly get unexpected rings of their doorbell. Who's ringing? When someone rings my doorbell unexpectedly, it's usually some drunk schmuck who rang the wrong bell, but if it's during the day, it might be some postal delivery person with a package. When my parents get an unexpected ring, it's usually a package. They answer. And unlike the phone calls, I don't have a problem with that.

[Marlene]

I'm surprised at the number of people in this thread who sound like they regularly get unexpected rings of their doorbell. Who's ringing? When someone rings my doorbell unexpectedly, it's usually some drunk schmuck who rang the wrong bell, but if it's during the day, it might be some postal delivery person with a package. When my parents get an unexpected ring, it's usually a package. They answer. And unlike the phone calls, I don't have a problem with that.

Not so surprising. We get lots of door to door solicitations all the time. For charities, for any number of things. I will answer the door during the day, as usually it is a delivery of some sort. I never answer the door at night unless I'm expecting someone (a) because it's probably someone who wants money (b) quite often I'm alone in the house at night. I'm not taking any chances.

[Pan]

Hmmm...Things are a lot different outside of built-up areas like most of New York City is. No-one's ever buzzed me to try to get me to give them money. If they did, I definitely wouldn't let them in and would suspect them of trying to rob me.

[Katherine]

If I'm not expecting a package, a knock on the door can only be someone trying to convert me.

[tryska]

i don't answer the door, unless i'm expecting someone.

i'm originally from NY, my roommates originally from NJ. Neither of us will answer if we're not expecting someone. our friends and associates know to call before coming over.

and frankly besides it being a a city thing (took me a long time to break the habit of screaming "WHO!!" at the door when someone unexpected knocked) it's a security thing.

Here in Atlanta, there have been numerous occurences of serial rapists and home invasions in apartment complexes. especially now that we are basically on ground floor, it makes sense to be careful who you open up for.

[Pan]

You got it, Tryska.

When I'm expecting a delivery of food, I buzz the guy in but since I'm on the 2nd floor, I get to see who's coming with enough time to slam the door and lock it if it should end up being someone other than the delivery person.

[tryska]

lucky you - we don't really have that luxury. i kinda wish we had a chain on the door, so we could open it without giving entry, but no such luck. they don't do that down here.

[elyse]

You can always install one, silly.

[tommy]

Hmmm...Things are a lot different outside of built-up areas like most of New York City is. No-one's ever buzzed me to try to get me to give them money. If they did, I definitely wouldn't let them in and would suspect them of trying to rob me.

right. and i'm guessing marlene doesn't get a lot of "drunk shmucks" ringing her bell.

lucky you - we don't really have that luxury. i kinda wish we had a chain on the door, so we could open it without giving entry, but no such luck. they don't do that down here.

i dare say that if someone wants to get in, the chain isn't going to do much. one kick or a hard blow from the shoulder and it's history. a peephole and deabolt are probably the best defense.

Edited December 30, 2003 by tommy (log)

[Pan]

I don't think a chain is nearly good enough. A chain doesn't protect you against a gun, for example. My folks' apartment had a chain while I was growing up, and I never used it. I always looked through the peep hole and opened the door only if I knew who was outside. Unfortunately, I don't have a functioning peep hole in my apartment.

[Pan]

I don't get many drunk schmucks buzzing me, only occasionally.

[tryska]

I don't think a chain is nearly good enough. A chain doesn't protect you against a gun, for example. My folks' apartment had a chain while I was growing up, and I never used it. I always looked through the peep hole and opened the door only if I knew who was outside. Unfortunately, I don't have a functioning peep hole in my apartment.

this is true.

unless of course i invest in a shotgun and let that answer the door for me from behind the chain. *lol*

actually i believe one of the old laws for my county requires that each head of household have a gun.

for now, i'll just go with not answering it, i think. it's been working well so far.

[Katherine]

I don't think a chain is nearly good enough. A chain doesn't protect you against a gun, for example. My folks' apartment had a chain while I was growing up, and I never used it. I always looked through the peep hole and opened the door only if I knew who was outside. Unfortunately, I don't have a functioning peep hole in my apartment.

Can't one be installed, or do you have a metal door?

[elyse]

You can still install on if you do have a metal door,

[Marlene]

right. and i'm guessing marlene doesn't get a lot of "drunk shmucks" ringing her bell.

True

[Squeat Mungry]

As far as answering the door, for me it is now exactly the same thing. Thanks to my building's management's infinite wisdom, the door buzzer now RINGS THE DAMN PHONE!! I can't tell if someone's calling me or visiting me! I never would have taken the apartment had that been the case when I moved in.

So now the same policy applies to visitors: start talking and if I recognize you and am in the mood to socialize, I'll respond. I'll add that this is particularly annoying to me because I live in apartment number one and there is frequently a "for rent" sign on the building. People ring me assuming I'm the super, who actually lives in number fifteen. Grrrr.

Squeat

[Pan]

actually i believe one of the old laws for my county requires that each head of household have a gun.

Are you in Cobb County?

[tryska]

why yes.

yes i am.

[Pan]

Figured it out!

[Suzanne F]

If I'm not expecting a package, a knock on the door can only be someone trying to convert me.

Yup. Recently the outside buzzer rang -- Chabad trying to get in to offer us a menorah for Chanukah (not quite as aggressive as the Mitzvah Tank, but still . . . )

The neat thing about our security system is that we can see who's at the street door, and must buzz them in for the elevator to open in the lobby (unless you've got a key to call it). So this guy is standing there proselytizing long after I've said, "No, thank you" and hung up. He's talking on and on, oblivious to the fact that I'm only watching, not listening.

Right now, though, I'm expecting my grocery delivery (mmm, stuff to make posole, and italian cold cuts, and broccoli, and and and ). But when the guy buzzes, I'll probably jump. Door buzzers, doorbells, and telephones are unnerving.

[tryska]

Figured it out!

nice googling work!

no stalking allowed tho.

[Pan]

I didn't google, Tryska! I've read stories about Cobb County in the past and didn't forget what I read. But if we're going to discuss this more, I guess we'd better go to PM. So back to phone answering at meal time...

[bloviatrix]

Right now, though, I'm expecting my grocery delivery (mmm, stuff to make posole, and italian cold cuts, and broccoli, and and and ). But when the guy buzzes, I'll probably jump. Door buzzers, doorbells, and telephones are unnerving.

You too? I always jump when the doorman buzzes up. It tends to be so unexpected, and the noise is extremely harsh. More often than not, the delivery is not for us. But the deliverymen can't speak english, so the doormen think they're asking for our apartment.