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help me plan my mom's b-day dinner


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My mom is turning 60 in a few weeks, and I want to surprise her with some of her favorite foods for dinner. So far I have a few ideas, and the dinner seems to be taking a creole/southern direction, a style of cooking I'm not really too comfortable with. So far the guest list is seven people, including my very picky sister and her boyfriend whose taste I'm not that familiar with. My mom likes foods that the rest of us (ie my sisters and husband) don't like, so I need to come up with stuff that will please everyone while including the things that are just for mom.

Here are my ideas so far:

Spinach artichoke dip with chips--family favorite, but I need a good recipe

clams on the half shell w/ cocktail sauce--me and mom like this, but probably not for my sisters

shrimp remoulade--mom's fave

soft shell crabs (sauteed) or crawfish (boiled)--no go for picky sis

salad ???

fried okra?--mom loves this, but no one else does

starch?

other veg?

almond praline cake

I figure picky sister can eat boiled shrimp without the remoulade sauce and whatever starches and other veg we have--she doesn't eat that much so I'm not that concerned. As you can see what I really need help with are the side dishes. What would be appropriate with this menu? Thanks!

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If your Mom is like mine, (and I don't think mine is an exception to the rule), she'll probably be more concerned that everyone else enjoys the meal than with her own pleasure?

SB (not even sure what his Mom's favorite foods are :huh: )

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If your Mom is like mine, (and I don't think mine is an exception to the rule), she'll probably be more concerned that everyone else enjoys the meal than with her own pleasure?

SB (not even sure what his Mom's favorite foods are :huh: )

Which is exactly why your idea to make a special meal for her is so wonderful!

My kids have done this for us and for me. I mean who bakes for the baker*?

I would definitely do the fried okra. You can buy it frozen if that doesn't offend anyone's sensibilities. Or you could do it 'from scratch' more or less and bread some zucchini and/or mushrooms for the other folks. Onion rings?

I think I would just make a real elaborate salad that can substitute as a meal for anyone who needs to fill up. Even two different salads would cover a multitude of palates.

*Umm, little story about kidlette making my birthday cake one year. Chocolate on chocolate to die for. She was mildly upset that some of the chocolate in the frosting did not melt & made specks. The next day we got an ad in the mail for a new Cookbook with a ginormous glossy picture of chocolate cake with chocolate speckled icing. Too cool.

Steve, does your Mom like speckled?

SB might wanna think about asking his Sweet Mom maybe and taking some notes?

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you are such a sweet child!!! Good for you doing this...my son's keep telling me that "we want to have you to dinner as soon as we clean the house" it has been two years!!!! They come over instead and offer to help me cook ..but to sit and enjoy a feast they prepared would be the best gift ever!!!

starch ..well rice of course!!! your menu screams for it!

salad ...with all the wonderful dishes you are preparing I think a lovely fresh mix of spring greens tossed with a vinegar oil dressing would be perfect!

I would also offer some sliced tomatoes drizzled with olive oil salt and fresh cracked pepper ...if you have nice ones there ..although this time of year hot house is all we have ...they go so nicely with the shellfish

this will be a wonderful meal for sure!! good for you!!!

Edited by hummingbirdkiss (log)
why am I always at the bottom and why is everything so high? 

why must there be so little me and so much sky?

Piglet 

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you are such a sweet child!!! Good for you doing this...my son's keep telling me that "we want to have you to dinner as soon as we clean the house" it has been two years!!!!  They come over instead and offer to help me cook ..but to sit and enjoy a feast they prepared would be the best gift ever!!!

That's very nice of you, but I have to be honest..this dinner is not taking place in my home. Actually, my mom can't come over to my house because she is allergic to cats and I have 2. We are doing this at one of her friend's houses, but I am doing all or most of the cooking. I am hoping the hostess will make the fried okra, but I like the idea of doing other fried veggies for those of us who don't like okra. Does okra need a three stage breading, or do you just throw it into the cornmeal (it should be cornmeal, right?)? My mom is from Texas, but I grew up in NY and somehow never really learned much about Southern food.

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I have done both with okra tossed seasoned cornmeal and also first flour then egg wash then corn meal ...and both were good ..the second one turned out better for sitting longer the coating stayed more crispy ..

I know this is not traditional but I have actually made Cajun seasoned panko for okra and that was killer good!!! stayed very crispy!!!

Edited by hummingbirdkiss (log)
why am I always at the bottom and why is everything so high? 

why must there be so little me and so much sky?

Piglet 

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Corn, creamed or cob but creamed is universally liked and very southern, seems appropriate for this meal. A very simple cucumber salad would work quite nicely, just cucumber and onion, salt and pepper, marinated for a couple of hours in either balsamic vinegar or white vinegar with a little sugar. Tomatoes could be added as well, and tomato seems to be lacking in your plan. They don't have to be the big fat slicers as long as you are getting the tomato taste and acid contrast in somewhere. If you go with the rice, and with the seafood rice would be appropriate, a tomato "gravy" of some sort could be concocted, or you could just serve the softshells and sauce over rice. The roumalade would be nice over rice, as well. I prefer the simpler form of fried okra (dredged in white cornmeal and pan fried - not deep fried which is the proper way to prepare the triple breaded type of okra) but those preferences usually come from childhood. Macaroni and cheese could work with this as well. A sort of "smothered" summer squash comes to mind, if you can get good yellow squash. Easy and holds well.

Have you considered cornbread? Easily done and can give almost any meal a southern feel.

Homemade ice cream has become our birthday meal dessert in recent years, and part of southern tradition, even if it is just plain (very good) vanilla.

ETA: Good on you. I cooked my own birthday dinner (as well as everyone else's for the last gazillion years) last time! Hopefully by the time I turn 60 one of my kids will be in a position to return the favor!

Edited by annecros (log)
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Thanks annecros and hummingbirdkiss--I'm pretty sure that I've seen my mom make fried okra by just tossing it with cornmeal, so I think I'll go with that method now that I know I'm not crazy. However, I do like the idea that k8memphis suggested of making other fried vegetables, some of which would need a 3 stage process. Hmmm...I don't want to get too carried away here.

The cucumber salad is a really good idea and my mom has a recipe that I know she really likes. At this point I'm thinking I might skip a heavy starch dish and just do a bunch of salads, some of which can be made ahead. Maybe a green salad, the cucumber salad with tomatoes if I can find good ones, and a three bean salad.

Cornbread did cross my mind, but then I remembered savory monkey bread. We used to make it with tons of butter and chopped garlic using store bought bread dough. I haven't had it for years and it would probably spark lots of family discussion. Now, should I attempt to make the dough from scratch? I know it's not hard, but I don't want to take on more than I can handle.

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Thanks annecros and hummingbirdkiss--I'm pretty sure that I've seen my mom make fried okra by just tossing it with cornmeal, so I think I'll go with that method now that I know I'm not crazy. However, I do like the idea that k8memphis suggested of making other fried vegetables, some of which would need a 3 stage process. Hmmm...I don't want to get too carried away here.

The cucumber salad is a really good idea and my mom has a recipe that I know she really likes. At this point I'm thinking I might skip a heavy starch dish and just do a bunch of salads, some of which can be made ahead. Maybe a green salad, the cucumber salad with tomatoes if I can find good ones, and a three bean salad.

Cornbread did cross my mind, but then I remembered savory monkey bread. We used to make it with tons of butter and chopped garlic using store bought bread dough. I haven't had it for years and it would probably spark lots of family discussion. Now, should I attempt to make the dough from scratch? I know it's not hard, but I don't want to take on more than I can handle.

How was it prepared at home? If you really want to rekindle memories, do it that way. The bean salad is a great idea, but did you guys ever eat macaroni salad?

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....Now, should I attempt to make the dough from scratch? I know it's not hard, but I don't want to take on more than I can handle....

On TVFN the other day a Vegas pastry chef made regular Monkey bread with canned dough...."'cause thats how its made"

she also made Gorilla bread by stuffing the biscuit dough with cream cheese first.

tracey

The great thing about barbeque is that when you get hungry 3 hours later....you can lick your fingers

Maxine

Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

"It is the government's fault, they've eaten everything."

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no, we never ate macaroni salad. Actually, that's the real problem I'm having planning this dinner is that I'm trying to make things that my mom grew up with and loves, and a lot of those things are totally different from the things I ate growing up. Seems odd that the food culture of my childhood should be that different from the food culture of my mom's, especially since she did most of the cooking when I was growing up. My dad was a native new yorker, so I'm guessing she changed her cooking style to suit his tastes. So yeah, cucumbers, fried okra, remoulade sauce (anything with mayo really)---these are all things I don't like and would never make for myself. I'm really trying to push myself to make this menu something that she will like but that the rest of us will be able to eat.

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Oh, of course she did.

You may want to give homemade mayo a try. I personally dislike mayo (makes me a pariah at times) and go homemade or Miracle Whip ( I use because hubby eats MW with a spoon) when required to eat a mayonnaise type substance.

It is difficult to prepare something well when you personally dislike it the food or it is not to your taste.

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Thanks for the dip recipes. It's embarrassing, but my favorite version of the dip is served at california pizza kitchen. After I posted before I googled it and found their recipe online, so I think that I'm going to make that one.

I just received and email from my picky sister which said that she doesn't like shrimp unless it's in pasta (?!) so she's probably not going to eat much. I just hope she doesn't sulk.

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