Cocktails I'm supposed to like, but don't

[FrogPrincesse]

I forgot to mention the Boulevardier, that foul concoction (see here). The 1794 is a fine variation but does not count because the base spirit is different.

I thought for a while that bourbon + campari could not possibly work, but the Paper Airplane and the Professional actually work brilliantly. Also the Left Hand which is a bourbon-heavy Boulevardier with mole bitters actually works for me.

[Rafa]

I like the Boulevardier fine, but agree that the 1794 is a much better drink.

[brinza]

Bloody Mary. I want a beverage, not soup, thank you. I've actually mixed them for people, but I prefer not to be within three feet of the things.

[Adam George]

I like the Boulevardier fine, but agree that the 1794 is a much better drink.

I've been making my Boulevardiers as per this link anyway.

http://cold-glass.com/2010/09/15/1794-cocktail-the-boulevardier-comes-to-manhattan/

I was vaguely aware it wasn't the most historically accurate version and right now I've know idea where I discovered it, but was happy and never bothered to try another.

[Yajna Patni]

I love a martini, and aviation (I especially love an aviation) Vespas, I adore a papa doble, sour and strong is yum to me.... but I am not fond of a manhattan. I like my whiskey neat. I think I find red vermouth challenging.. it is a little sweet and syrupy.

[EvergreenDan]

Yajna -- I'm with out on sweet vermouth. I often sub half sweet and half dry into recipes. Or use Punt e Mes which is much more bitter, helping to balance the sweetness.

Ironically, I do like Manhattan's made just about any way. I don't know why I can enjoy a sweet Manhattan but not enjoy sweet anything else.

[sbumgarner]

I like the Boulevardier fine, but agree that the 1794 is a much better drink.

I've been making my Boulevardiers as per this link anyway.

http://cold-glass.com/2010/09/15/1794-cocktail-the-boulevardier-comes-to-manhattan/

I was vaguely aware it wasn't the most historically accurate version and right now I've know idea where I discovered it, but was happy and never bothered to try another.

My favorite Boulevardier variant (and better than the original in my opinion) is this one from Kindred Cocktails:

Boulevardier Riff (Fred Sarkis)

by Fred Sarkis, Sable Kitchen & Bar, Chicago, IL

1 1/2 oz Bourbon, WL Weller

3/4 oz Cynar

3/4 oz Bonal Gentiane Quina

1 pn Salt (small amount)

2 ds Orange bitters

Stir, strain, straight up, cocktail glass

It moves pretty far away from the original but damn it's good.

[Rafa]

That sounds delicious, but probably deserving of a name other than Boulevardier. Along those lines, Toby Cecchini suggests thirds of Campari, Cynar, and Braulio.

[Yajna Patni]

Yajna -- I'm with out on sweet vermouth. I often sub half sweet and half dry into recipes. Or use Punt e Mes which is much more bitter, helping to balance the sweetness.

Ironically, I do like Manhattan's made just about any way. I don't know why I can enjoy a sweet Manhattan but not enjoy sweet anything else.

I should try a bottle of punt e mes. I like the more bitter.

[FrogPrincesse]

My favorite Boulevardier variant (and better than the original in my opinion) is this one from Kindred Cocktails:

Boulevardier Riff (Fred Sarkis)

by Fred Sarkis, Sable Kitchen & Bar, Chicago, IL

1 1/2 oz Bourbon, WL Weller

3/4 oz Cynar

3/4 oz Bonal Gentiane Quina

1 pn Salt (small amount)

2 ds Orange bitters

Stir, strain, straight up, cocktail glass

It moves pretty far away from the original but damn it's good.

That looks good (no Campari though, so not really a Boulevardier per se). I am always on the lookout for good cocktails using Bonal and may try this one tonight. The bourbon + bonal combo reminds me of the Mountain Man, but I digress...

Edited March 28, 2013 by FrogPrincesse (log)

[turkoftheplains]

I'm with Mike, Rafa, and anyone who has actually consumed a Monkey Gland, the sole condition that is both necessary and sufficient to know with certainty that the drink utterly and unredeemably sucks.

The main failure of this drink seems to be a lack of sourness. I've been able to modify the Monkey Gland into a drink that's pleasant (but still probably not worthy of canonization) by mixing in some lemon juice or adding citric acid directly. I don't find the idea of gin, citrus, maraschino, grenadine, and absinthe otherwise objectionable, but without acid the drink is a cacophony of maraschino funk, pomegranate, and anise.

Mine is the Bloody Mary, which I've never liked no matter who was making it.

[Adam George]

I made a Trader Vic's 1:1:1:1etc Zombie the other day and wasn't fussed. I was confused - I thought I really liked it before.

Time to experiment with Don Beach's version.

I made a 1934 Donn Beach Zombie last night and wasn't impressed, which surprised me, since it's usually one of my favorite Tiki drinks. I think my mistake was using a full ounce of Smith and Cross for the Jamaican rum; I love S&C, but it's a bully, and even against other burly ingredients like falernum and LH151 it tended to hog the spotlight. All I got was its leathery sour note with a bit of spice and sweet and citrus from the other ingredients. The Lemon Hart and spices became more apparent as it warmed.

Well, I've settled on a Beachcomber Zombie recipe for my new Tiki list that you might like to try, although I can't imagine it's too different from yours, except for the brands. I imagine you're making yours much bigger and stronger than I feel comfortable serving my guests, and with products that would screw with my margins, too!

25ml Pampero Especial

25ml Appleton VX

20ml Plantation 73%

15ml Taylor's Falernum

20ml Lime

10ml Pink Grapefruit

5ml House-made Blackcurrant & Hibiscus "Grenadine" (Jing infusion, steeped very strong, spiced with Angostura, Peychaud's and Black Pepper)

3 Dashes Pernod Absinthe

3 Dashes Angostura (Both from CK dash bottles - Use two dashes from an Angostura bottle)

Brief speed shake to cool, strained over cubed ice in a Schott Pilsner glass, crowned with crushed and garnished with a large mint sprig, grapefruit twist and lime wedge.

Edited April 3, 2013 by Adam George (log)

[lesliec]

Blimey! I'm coming over ...

[Rafa]

I made a Trader Vic's 1:1:1:1etc Zombie the other day and wasn't fussed. I was confused - I thought I really liked it before.

Time to experiment with Don Beach's version.

I made a 1934 Donn Beach Zombie last night and wasn't impressed, which surprised me, since it's usually one of my favorite Tiki drinks. I think my mistake was using a full ounce of Smith and Cross for the Jamaican rum; I love S&C, but it's a bully, and even against other burly ingredients like falernum and LH151 it tended to hog the spotlight. All I got was its leathery sour note with a bit of spice and sweet and citrus from the other ingredients. The Lemon Hart and spices became more apparent as it warmed.

Well, I've settled on a Beachcomber Zombie recipe for my new Tiki list that you might like to try, although I can't imagine it's too different from yours, except for the brands. I imagine you're making yours much bigger and stronger than I feel comfortable serving my guests, and with products that would screw with my margins, too!

25ml Pampero Especial

25ml Appleton VX

20ml Plantation 73%

15ml Taylor's Falernum

20ml Lime

10ml Pink Grapefruit

5ml House-made Blackcurrant & Hibiscus "Grenadine" (Jing infusion, steeped very strong, spiced with Angostura, Peychaud's and Black Pepper)

3 Dashes Pernod Absinthe

3 Dashes Angostura (Both from CK dash bottles - Use two dashes from an Angostura bottle)

Brief speed shake to cool, strained over cubed ice in a Schott Pilsner glass, crowned with crushed and garnished with a large mint sprig, grapefruit twist and lime wedge.

This sounds delicious. Smart rum choices. I wish the Plantation overproof were available at retail here; I've had it at bars and it's delicious but I've yet to find it on sale anywhere. Yours looks a lot like the recipe I use, except that I tend to go for white grapefruit (I like the bitterness and emphatic terpenes) and homemade dark falernum. Your "grenadine" sounds interesting; I've been experimenting with non-pomegranate grenadines like sour cherry and raspberry (since Camper English found that most historical grenadine probably didn't contain much pomegranate anyway) but I haven't gotten around to blackcurrant. Spicing it's a good idea.

[Rafa]

Back on topic: I made a friend who likes gin and sophisticated liqueurs a Last Word, thinking she'd love it on first or second sip like most people I serve it to do. She sipped it quietly for a minute and then informed me that she couldn't finish it because it smelled "like a sneeze."

[Steamtrain]

These 3 with gin and orange juice, I can't seem to understand.

The Abbey

Income Tax Cocktail

Bronx Cocktail

Any crushed ice or frozen cocktail is too cold for my taste buds and my brain.

I haven't run in to any frozen cocktails but I might as well bash them while I'm here.

I don't think anyone is supposed to like the combination of champagne and absinthe,

Death in the Afternoon.

[Rafa]

You should really avoid the Monkey Gland. I mean, everyone should, but you more than most.

I think the problem with those drinks is that orange juice just isn't interesting enough to counter their lack of acidity. In small quantities or as part of an ensemble with other citrus juices and other attentional ingredients (say, in a Fog Cutter) fresh orange juice can add an appealing fresh sweetness and slight bite, but in large quantities it washes out other flavors and makes drinks one-dimensional and insipid. I understand that orange juice was a luxury, not a household staple, pre-Prohibition, and that alcoholic drinks showcasing orange juice like the Bronx seemed both exotic and accessibly sweet. But now we drink differently and most of us expect all the ingredients in a drink to contribute something; we don't usually just want slightly more interesting orange juice with a kick. To me, the Bronx is basically a more sophisticated Screwdriver.

[Steamtrain]

The Monkey Gland is just OK for me. I like the absinthe in the Monkey Gland, and add orange bitters as in the Julie Reiner version.

And you are correct, I like orange juice in drinks as long as other citrus is present; Stork Club, Ma Bonnie Wee Hen, Ward Eight.

I love Scotch cocktails so the Blood and Sand is a keeper.

[Yajna Patni]

If a last words smells like a sneeze, perhaps I should start sniffing sneezes more often.

[Rafa]

Monkey Gland (Palatable)

2 oz Gin

3/4 oz Lime juice

1/2 oz Curaçao

1/4 oz Raspberry syrup

1 rinse Absinthe

1 ds Bitters, Angostura

1 wdg Lime (as garnish)

Shake, strain, up, garnish.

History

Cocktail revivalists have long lamented the tendency of the venerable Monkey Gland to resist palatability. To the modern palate, the standard Monkey Gland recipe—gin, some dashed absinthe and raspberry syrup, and a heaping helping of orange juice, justly called by Dan Chadwick the "fruit of cocktail death"—registers as an unbalanced, overly sweet mishmash of discordant flavors, lacking structure or shame. But with a bit of modern tinkering—adding some acid here, dashing complementary bitters there, substituting balanced orange liqueur for the insipid juice—we arrive at something with the zippy acidity and bright citrus flavors of a... well, we arrive at a Pegu Club, with some berry juice and an absinthe rinse. Which, come to think of it, is a pretty good thing. Enjoy.

--

Kindred Cocktails | Craft + Collect + Concoct + Categorize + Community

Well, I tried. It's still not as good to my palate as a straight Pegu or a Clover Club. Any other ideas for rescuing the Gland? Fresh raspberries? Different source of acid? Actual fresh-squeezed monkey gland for craft authenticity?

Edited July 23, 2013 by Rafa (log)

[FrogPrincesse]

I've long given up on the Monkey Gland. Even PDT could not get it right.

[Rafa]

Well, if PDT couldn't do it, maybe it's time to just bury the Monkey Gland once and for all.

[slkinsey]

I've long given up on the Monkey Gland. Even PDT could not get it right.

The PDT recipe fot the Monkey Gland is not very good (also, I think it was a mistake for you to use blood orange juice). Personally, I think the Monkey Gland is a delightful drink, but it has to be made right. The original formula as provided by Dr. Cocktail works for me, with these admonitions as to the ingredients:

1.5 ounces Tanqueray*

1.5 ounces Valencia orange juice, squeezed to order and fine-strained

1 teaspoon absinthe

1 teaspoon homemade** grenadine

* or another high proof, juniper-forward gin such as Junipero or Royal Dock -- also good with Old Tom gin

** provides extra acidity and body that commercial examples just don't

Edited July 25, 2013 by slkinsey (log)

[FrogPrincesse]

I've long given up on the Monkey Gland. Even PDT could not get it right.

The PDT recipe fot the Monkey Gland is not very good (also, I think it was a mistake for you to use blood orange juice).

*hangs head in shame*

[slkinsey]

Ha ha! The main thing is that you want tart orange juice for drinks where there is no other acid component. Blood orange juice usually isn't. Clearly the PDT recipe tries to bump up the acidity by using pomegranate molasses instead of grenadine, but I think this misses out on the richness and the additional orange flower and vanilla flavors of good homemade grenadine. Also, I think their use of an absinthe rinse is a bit cute and seriously short-changes the amount of absinthe that's supposed to be in there. Hey... Not every recipe in a book is going to be great, and it's not like the Monkey Gland featured on PDT menus and benefitted from their full attention. The PDT recipe is more of a "Monkey Gland" than a Monkey Gland.