Most Creepy and Disgusting Dive Bar

[tommy]

some ravenswood lodi zin (aka, grape juice) earlier, and now a beck's light. tasty, refershing, and only 140 calories. quite a bargain. and a bottle of poland spring.

[awbrig]

Becks is always refershing

Poland Springs is good, but try FIJI water...

ravenswood...not bad...

Me: Grilled Usinger Bratwurst - first braised in beer

Drinking FIJI water and Estancia Pinot Noir

[Aurora]

Me:  Grilled Usinger Bratwurst - first braised in beer, FIJI water and now Estancia Pinot Noir

OK, I'm going way off topic here:

FIJI water?

For cryin' out loud, you are text book!

It's a Usinger's brat, not a key to the gate of Heaven. Are you trying to tell me that some unknown subtlety of flavor is going to be brought out of a Usinger's by soaking it in bottled bull from FIJI?

What? Is Lake Michigan not good enough for you?

That's it. You're not coming to Bratwurst Days with me. In fact, you're banned from Bratwurst Days. That's right--BANNED. You'd pull out a bottle of FIJI water and they would run us back to the highway.

No, my friend, I can't let that happen.

Don't forget where you come from!

[maggiethecat]

Totally, otally what Aurora said!

[bourdain]

Great Dive Bars of the Past:

Lady Anne's Full Moon Saloon on 8th Avenue in NYC. Warm beer, slack-breasted bar-hags, beat coke and pool-playing pimps--and Merle Haggard on the juke. Time Out's bar reporter said: "The worst bar I have EVER been in--and I've been to Albania!"

The Edelweiss: Towering transvestite hustlers, and German decor. Under the Market Diner--frequently closed for morals violations.

The Terminal Bar: Across from the old Port Authority--daytime drinkers with towels wrapped around their wrists to guide their morning shots to their mouths without spilling.

Current Non-NY favoritesFavorites:

1) Snake and Jake's Christmas Club Lounge, New Orleans. God, I love this place. Dark, skanky, Christmas motif, and naked people drink for free.

2) Checkpoint Charlie's, New Orleans. Get hammered while the blood and hair from last night are washed in the convenient in-house laundromat!

3) The Highlander, Atlanta.

And there's a great dive in Oakland--was it the Dahlia? with a dark, smoke friendly ambiance and an all-metal jukebox. Anybody know the place? I want t go back.

[Wilfrid]

Can anyone remember the name of the mock honky tonk over on 8th in the 40s (NYC)?  It was a small bar with a weird plastic banquette with special places to put your paper plates of fried fish.  A cowgirl logo, and the name was something like the Blue Moon Saloon - but I don't think that's right.  It later became a cleaned-up anonymous cocktail lounge.

Lady Ann's Full Moon Saloon it was. Thank you, sir.

[awbrig]

I only drink FIJI water whether Im eating Brats or Lobster...nothing to do with the food Im eating but everything to do with how FIJI water tastes....

Oh, and I was drinking the FIJI not braising the brats in it...I guess my post was a tad confusing...I would agree that would be a bit much

[pjs]

My favorite dive bar was across the street from Creedmoor State Hospital in Queens. The fact that the sot behind the bar served me anything I wanted despite my being only fifteen years old had nothing to do with it--it was the ambiance. After closing we'd go swim in the hospital's outdoor pool--since the inmates weren't allowed to use it, we thought someone should. They drained it soon afterwards. They also had a superb baseball field complete with stands, also unused. We partied in the dugouts.

In his post Bourdain didn't mention the Haymarket on eighth although he refers to it in Kitchen Confidential. I used to go there--late 70's--for the Whitbread on tap until I had to slam a too friendly regular against the bathroom wall. I still have nightmares featuring the depraved cook they contained in the cubicle at the end of the bar.

PJ

[aliwaks]

Dirty Franks in Philadelphia, 13th & Pine the odor of smoke,old beer, neglected hot dogs, perspirtation and hopelessness clings for days no matter how much you wash.

The floor is a mysterious substance half solid half liquid held togther tremulously by cigarette butts.

The last time (and I mean the last time) I was there I found a disposbale razor in the bathroom ...not a drug razor someone was shaving thier legs in the sink that produces a bare dribble of cold brown water with the bar of cracked & fingerprinted soap..

After prying myself out of the bio hazard that is the bathroom (still needing to pee mind you as there was no way that any article of my clothing was coming off in thier in fact needed a Haz-Mat suit. ) I and several other patrons were projectile vomited on.

Not surprisingly I was the only one perturbed enough by this event to leave.

[col klink]

I presume your friends prescribe to the old adage "when in Rome..."

[Kerouac1964]

Dive bars of Sioux City, IA - a city famous since the 1890s for a huge number of bars/saloons/taverns to quench the thirst of packing house workers.

~~GREENVILLE/MORNINGSIDE AREA~~

At one time in a single block, there were 4 bars which for Greenvilles tiny size is amazing. Fun would be had on a Fri/Sat night by walking back/forth between them all. A favorite pastime was to catch this guy who would drink beer then secretly try to piss on the bar while standing. The sick bastard did this in about every bar in Greenville.

Greenville Tap - Gritty floor, 2 beer Tap long bar. Used to attract the best pool shooters in Sioux City. Lots of In-between card games and drink wagering on pool games. Smell of urine so bad in Men's room you had to hold your breath or go outside. A crusty regular in a wheelchair did just that with his trusty plastic milk jug. Paralyzed from a long-ago shooting in another bar.

The old Dodge Inn. A great biker hang out, located smack in the middle of a residential neighborhood. Gorgeous pinewood floors. The owner a serioius, serious collector of multiple Harleys, bar memorabillia. Destroyed in a fire a few years ago. Reborn in a stockyards location....A damn good man.

Miles Inn Tavern. A small shotgun-doored breadbox of a joint. Serving ice cold Schlitz in iced "Schooner" Goblets. Famous in the city for their "Charlie Boy" Loosemeats. Get there by 8pm on a busy night, or risk going hungry.

Jungle Lounge. A place selling some damn old fine brands of beer. Hamms being one of them. Cheap '60s turqoise stained carpeting with flaking off Tiki veniered walls. A great dark day-time place to hide in. Has a few rare couches and easy chairs in corners for inhanced comfort, but you got to walk up to the bar for your drinks. Used to be next to a tiny corner cafe. Both now torn down due to City pressure to "renew" the neighborhood.

~~STOCKYARDS Area~~

Sophie's Cattleman Lounge - Tiny tar-papered joint across from the now defunct stocyards. Opens at 8am for those hair-of-the-dog type drinkers to start their day. Great country/western on the Jukebox.

Mavericks Bar. The old Marvricks was a breadbox shotgun design. When the front door opened you could hear the cattle mowing and smell them during the day, when the yards were up and running. Favorite hangout of the Livestock wranglers. Free check cashing serves for them. Used to run illegal slot machines. Now is remodelled as a lap dancing place. Owned by an old high schoolmate of mine.

~~OLD 4TH ST. "The Red Light District"~~

Pink Pussy Cat.

Mainliner Lounge.

Harbor Inn.

- Defunct molty collection of Pimp, biker, prostitute factories. The area is undergoing a Yuppie renewal of overpriced coffee bars and a struggling microbrewery. One lone titty bar is struggling to stay in place.

This infamous street houses our best porn mag/mini movie house. Frances Canteen. They also happen to deal in used paperback books and probably have one of the biggest inventories in western Iowa.

The street once housed the the lone dirty movie theatre. A most unwelcome business, this place reeked of soiled popcorn napkins (although they never seemed to sell any popcorn). Inbetween movies a dancer would com on stage and meekly swing her flabby hips side to side, pasties thankfully in place.

~~WEST SIDE Area~~

West 7th St. was the "black side of town". Great soul music and blues on the jukeboxes. Us Greenville boys would go over to shoot pool there. Sort of a cultural exchange on both our parts.

Bob's Lighthouse. Home of the town's longest running illegal card game. Probably fixed. Never had the heart to play in it. Great pool hustling bar. They had a very rare (for the midwest) shuffleboard box long one side of the wall. Big room, with sitdown tables, and they used to have decent bands years ago. Great ecclectic rock on the jukebox. They once sold Great second cigars in plain orange boxes. I snacked on their bar sandwiches alot. The main crusty character was an old black dude, who sat their during the day nursing a drink. He'd get drunk and tell any white person he knew he like white people. Then he'd have this elaborate lengthy, solemn handshake with you to show he meant his word, though a bit drunk. I always believed his sincerity

~~RIVERSIDE Area~~

Located along the Big Sioux river, near the city limits with North Sioux City, SD.

Mary's Hideaway - A rockin' neighborhood biker bar. They had a bike area roped off for Harleys before Yuppies started buying up all the new model Harleys. I once walked out of there dead drunk, and was going to foolishly ride my Triumph motorcycle home. Mary followed me out and pleaded in vain for me to go across the street to her house and sleep in her yard. I kicked over the bike and roared off. Drove home without a hitch. Unfortunately, I tried that stunt once too often and hit a car head-on while drinking downtown (already drunk at Mary's earlier). Was told my a passing bystander I flew two full carlengths. Whoops.

How does that old song go? "...Those were the days, my friend. I'd thought they'd never end......".

Mike

aka Kerouac1964

Sioux City, IA

[pnapoli]

But on 56th Street off Seventh Avenue in NYC, there may still be a relatively foul place called La Fondue.  

you'll be disturbed to know that La Fondue has been around for quite a while. i remember going there in the 80s...but that was 'cuz they served alcohol to minors, which was pretty much the criterion i was working with back then.

[pnapoli]

Will there be any bartenders up there in Heaven?

Will the pubs never close, will the glass never drain?

No more D.T.'s and no shakes and no horrors

Very next morning you feel right as rain.

O God loves a drunk, the lowest of men

With the dogs in the street and the pigs in the pen.

But a drunk's only trying to get free of his body

And soar like an eagle high up there in heaven.

His shouts and his curses are just hymns and praises

To kick-start his mind now and then.

O God loves a drunk, come raise up your glasses, amen.

Richard Thompson

great tune. love RT.

[ngatti]

But on 56th Street off Seventh Avenue in NYC, there may still be a relatively foul place called La Fondue.  

you'll be disturbed to know that La Fondue has been around for quite a while. i remember going there in the 80s...but that was 'cuz they served alcohol to minors, which was pretty much the criterion i was working with back then.

It was actually, once avery quaint place. Clean, with a wonderful selection of cheeses and great tasting sourdough baguettes. Good pates and charcuterie platters. The first time I ever saw a kiwi was with a chocolate fondue in 1975

Alas, this was ca. 1973-77. Took my daughter there in 94. Blecch!!

Nick

[pnapoli]

anyone who spent time in beantown during their youth is going to nod slowly at this one:

hong kong lounge in harvard square. home of the original scorpion bowl.

[Stone]

Marz Bar was the first place I saw a herion overdose. Circa 1993. It lost it's panache when they put in more lights and hung that weird art work.

Wilfrid -- for a second I thought you were talking about the Scruffy Duffy.

I'm partial to the Grassroots Tavern (St. Marks) on weeknights. Where else do you have two regular pooches to play with. (Too many NYU kids on the weekends.)

[Stone]

anyone who spent time in beantown during their youth is going to nod slowly at this one:

hong kong lounge in harvard square.  home of the original scorpion bowl.

Thanks for the memories.

I was on a date with a girl from Boston. When I mentioned that I used to frequent Nicks Beef & Beer House while in college, she said, "yeah, I heard that was great, but it shut down right before I got to high school."

Remember Chippies? 10 pm to 6 am. The bathroom was through a trapdoor in the kitchen and out to the neighbor's yard.

"Don't make too much noise, she calls the cops." We once got kicked out for singing happy birthday.

[IrishCream]

I am surprised none of the Houstonians have mentioned Marfrelies. It is shocking and FUN to discover a total dive in River Oaks, the old wealth area of Houston. But this place is such a dive they don't even have a sign...you have to know it's there to find it.

The entrance is an unmarked, obscure backdoor in a strip shopping center. When you enter and the door closes behind you, you are immediately thrust into almost total darkness....and there is a step! The source of many laughs I am sure. The downstairs looks like a typical dive...but the upstairs is what supports this bar. Not tables but couches (which I am sure have not been replaced since 1960...ouch) and little private alcoves where couples do their thing in the murky dark. Not a pick-up bar...just a dive for couples.

One of many stories: during the rodeo a few years ago, a man who introduced himself as "Big Tex" came into the back alcove with 2 obvious, but attractive, hookers on his arms. He offered my date $50 if we would change couches with him (ours was bigger and we were just sitting there talking). My date said no! So they sat on the smaller couch opposite from us and proceeded to.......it was wild. I was laughing and gasping at their performance and whispering to my date, "Oh my God...can you believe they are doing that?" He was not reacting and I was starting to think he was just a conservative bore but finally he said, "Goddammit, I don't have my glasses! Stop torturing me! I can't see a thing!"

[oraklet]

a few memories of creepy and not only disgusting but sometimes dangerous bars from my youth:

in central copenhagen, friends an i used to go to a bar where you could meet all kinds of weird people, like illegal immigrants and starving artists. there would often be fights. then friends and i would sit under a table, continuing our conversation, while chairs and bottles were flying. somehow those involved in the fights allways stopped before the police would arrive.

in the suburbs where i lived, there was a bar with HA-regulars. i once went there with a 2 m tall masai'ish sudanese, and when we were leaving, one of the HAs stuck out his leg, trying to make my friend osman trip over it. but instead of tripping, he jumped (again, masai-style) one meter into the air and crashed down on the HA's leg - you could hear it break - and walked on out of the bar in his usual dignified manner. i, too, left - in a hurry. he later told me that in sudan, you have to deal with thugs without help from any kind of police. he even made me come with him back to that place the next saturday, and there was no trouble this time. osman just stood there at the bar, completely ignoring the HAs sitting at a table behind us.

i still don't understand why they didn't shoot us down.

[stagis]

This was a true dive, and disgusting. Brush-painted corrugated-steel walls on the interior, ice thrown in the urinals to keep the smell down......Wilson, CT, circa 1985 or so.

I almost forgot the one in Tijuana - whore peeing on the floor, the whole nine yards......

Edited November 22, 2002 by stagis (log)

[pnapoli]

I almost forgot the one in Tijuana - whore peeing on the floor, the whole nine yards......

but then, tijuana itself is really just one big dive bar, now isn't it?

....ever been to "peanuts and beer"?

[schaem]

Thermae in Bangkok. Fortunately, my only visit was towards dawn on my birthday and I have little recollection. The bar is notorious for being one of the few that (mysteriously) remained open druing periods of martial law and curfew in the early 90's.

[barbcutie]

Is Doc Holliday's still there on Ave. A and 10th or 11th, right across from the park? Used to be very competitive with Coyote Ugly (before the movie). I used to work there, but instead of pouring shots into customer's mouths I would spit them into their mouths (not forcefully - never spilled a drop!). There was nothing but country on the jukebox, a garbage can full of PBR in a can on ice, and our security was a poetry writing skinhead named Frenchie (he had "Frenchie" tattooed across his forehead) who would sometimes fall asleep drunk at the bar while he was working. At the end of the shift he would crawl under the pool table where he had a cot that he slept in.

Some of the best times in my life... now I work at a BBQ joint in Syracuse, NY - not a dive, exactly, but still a great place.

Also, what about a place called Sophie's (?) on 5th between B and C - very dark and everything was $2.00.

[Stone]

Also, what about a place called Sophie's (?) on 5th between B and C - very dark and everything was $2.00.

Still there. Along with Ace and Jacks. Three great places within stumbling distance.

[pnapoli]

i passed something today that looked like it might belong on this list. i was actually en route to another drinking establishment, and could not investigate, but it was called "billymark's" or something like that, and it was i think on 9th ave around 38th or somewhere in that vicinity. sign out front said it boasts the longest happy "hour" in the city: daily from 2-7.