Gaming the Chinese buffet

[Fat Guy]

Like them or not, buffets are -- at least in much of North America -- a popular means of experiencing Asian and Indian cuisine. They certainly have their advantages in terms of economy and diversity: for usually less than US$10, you get to try as many items as you like (and as much as you like). The drawbacks tend to be lack of freshness (stuff sitting on steam tables for too long) and, often, low quality. To a great extent, however, your fate is in your hands: you may never have an excellent meal at a buffet, but your strategy at the buffet can mean the difference between a bad meal and a good one.

As I've been doing research for a book on Asian restaurant dining, I've been eating at more of these buffets than ever before in my life. I started the journey believing that I'd simply exclude buffets from my research, but in town after town it became clear that this form was dominant, and that the real question isn't "buffet yes or no" but, rather, "how do I get the most out of a buffet?"

Here are a few of the strategies I've accumulated along the way, with the aim of maximizing quality and value (there are also strategies one can use to maximize healthfulness, though I don't go into those here). Maybe you experienced buffet eaters will have some tips to contribute too (I may use your ideas, if you don't mind).

Timing is key. At any buffet there's a life cycle to the meal. The best time to go is almost always right at the beginning of that cycle, because the food will be at its freshest. If the place opens at 11:30am for lunch or 5:00pm for dinner, that's your first choice of when to go. The best situation to be in is one where you arrive and the buffet is just in the process of being set up, so that over the next half hour or so you get to see all the new food come out. Another good time to go is at the peak of the meal service, because there will be the most turnover of food at that time. (A related point: choose a popular restaurant; buffets need a critical mass of customers in order to be able to offer a wide variety of good, fresh stuff.) The worst time to go is towards the end of a meal service, when it's dregs all the way.

Seek the high ground. Where you sit can make a big difference to your success at the buffet. If you can, get a table that has a good view of the part of the buffet containing the hot foods. It's also helpful to be close, though for comfort's sake you want to be at least one row of tables away from the buffet corridor.

Let the kitchen guide your meal. Flexibility in the sequencing of your meal is essential. It's not about when you want dumplings. It's about when the fresh, new, hot dumplings come out from the kitchen. Sometimes you're going to get your dumplings at the beginning of the meal, sometimes at the end and sometimes you have to be willing to dispense with dumplings because the fresh ones just didn't become available while you were in the house. I have, on many occasions, gone back for a freshly replenished savory item even after I've had dessert. Fried foods are always the top priority -- they degrade rapidly on the buffet. Dishes of a soupy nature hold up the best -- that what you should be eating during the down time.

Many trips, small quantities. Loading up big plates with tons of food -- sometimes I see people two-fisting it -- is just a bad idea if you want the best of the buffet in the best possible condition. You've really got to commit to the idea of making a lot of trips to the buffet. I think of my first trip or three as mostly exploratory: I'm trying to determine what's good. (If you've been to a given buffet many times before, and the offerings are always the same, you can of course skip this step.) I may very well taste the smallest available portion of every item on the buffet that isn't self-evidently terrible. There are often surprises. Once I figure out where to focus my eating, I can start prioritizing based on freshness. In some extreme instances, where you find yourself at a buffet that only has two or three good items, take as much as you can of those when they're fresh -- and resist the temptation to eat anything else.

Don't eat a lot of rice, noodles or other carbs unless they're really good. Fried rice and lo mein are rarely all that good, and they fill you up when you could be eating different, better food. (Not to mention the restaurant is hoping you'll fill up on carbs, thus keeping the food cost down.)

Don't overlook fresh fruit for dessert. Most of these places have a decent selection of fresh fruit on the buffet. You have to select carefully -- often there's unripe melon or whatever -- but when it's good it's good. Most other dessert items are likely to be terrible.

Finally, some buffets require special strategies because they're so elaborate. The really extensive places may have active cooking stations, or special nights when they feature seafood. In such cases, the made-to-order and special items are often (though not always) the best.

Remember, a buffet is a system in which the participants exercise a tremendous amount of self determination. The most facile person at the buffet is going to get the best meal.

[annecros]

Very good! The only tip I would add, is that the "best" food is the most relatively distant from the buffet line that it can get. Don't stumble and fill up on the cheap door stops, but rather walk to the farthest serving point, and work your way back to the table.

[Fat Guy]

So true. I wonder if there's some big national symposium where all the buffet owners get together to present papers. "We rerranged three different test buffets each day for a year per the slides on our PowerPoint presentation. In arrangement 221-C, customers ate 2.9 percent more white rice than in any other arrangement. We are therefore resolved that all buffets in the nation should switch immediately to arrangement 221-C for profit maximization."

[BryanZ]

I have a question that perhaps you or others can answers. I think some discussion and exchange of strategies can help our collective buffet-experience.

At many Chinese-ish buffets there are a couple of big ticket items, designed to draw in the crowds. Often times you see advertisements for unlimited crab legs, jumbo shrimp, lobster, etc. Unfortunately, these items are not out at all times, and when they are they're often replenished very infrequently. For example, your suggestion of hitting the buffet early doesn't always work in scoring these luxury items, as they're not even put out until later in the evening when more people are in the house.

My question is how do we increase our chances of obtaining these items. Yes, a strategic post in the restaurant paired with a watchful eye can help, but what if those items simply aren't there when the restaurant advertises they should be?

If dining early, can one ask for the luxury items that are usually only available later in the night. Similarly, can one ask a manager to replenish certain items if they've been absent for a lengthy period? Who should we ask, the manager, our server, a food runner? Often times language is an issue at this type of place, what is there to do?

[herbacidal]

I have a question that perhaps you or others can answers.  I think some discussion and exchange of strategies can help our collective buffet-experience.

At many Chinese-ish buffets there are a couple of big ticket items, designed to draw in the crowds.  Often times you see advertisements for unlimited crab legs, jumbo shrimp, lobster, etc.  Unfortunately, these items are not out at all times, and when they are they're often replenished very infrequently.  For example, your suggestion of hitting the buffet early doesn't always work in scoring these luxury items, as they're not even put out until later in the evening when more people are in the house.

My question is how do we increase our chances of obtaining these items.  Yes, a strategic post in the restaurant paired with a watchful eye can help, but what if those items simply aren't there when the restaurant advertises they should be?

If dining early, can one ask for the luxury items that are usually only available later in the night.  Similarly, can one ask a manager to replenish certain items if they've been absent for a lengthy period?  Who should we ask, the manager, our server, a food runner?  Often times language is an issue at this type of place, what is there to do?

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I've never been to a Chinese buffet at off times, and haven't been to one in years.

Keep an eye out for the food runners bringing the crabs/lobsters.

Sit facing the buffet/kitchen door.

[Fat Guy]

Bryan, my experience has differed from yours in one respect. Yes, I have often experienced the limited supply phenomenon, where a ration of lobster tails comes out every half hour and runs out in five minutes. But no, I have not noticed that they don't bring any out until the restaurant is full -- just the opposite, the last time I was at East Buffet (Queens) we went right when they opened and ate our fill off the first tray of lobster without much competition, whereas subsequent trays were descended upon by vulture-like crowds.

[mizducky]

You're definitely on top of your Asian buffet-strategizing game, FG. I'd say the only fine points I could add are the following:

--At buffets, size definitely does matter--the size of the establishment as a whole, that is. My current favorite here in San Diego seats a huge number of people, and the staff is extremely efficient at replenishing all the food those people hoover up, resulting in high food turnover an a high degree of freshness during most of their hours of operation.

--Yes, it is possible to fashion a relatively healthy meal from an Asian buffet--just minimize the obviously high-calorie-hit items (fried stuff, starches, sweets) and rock out on all the vegetables. I have been known to deliberately pick out lots of veggies from the "stir-fried"/braised dishes--I don't feel guilty about this, because I just know there are other customers trolling for all the meaty bits and leaving their veggies to me. Also, some buffets do offer healthier selections, as much because of their ethnic specialization as anything else. For instance, there's a Thai buffet I'm quite fond of--ah, the luxury of all-you-can-eat papaya salad!

--Buffet sushi is nearly always a dissapointment at best, and a horrorshow at worst. The exception being Japanese buffets that specialize in sushi, and that have a high enough volume to guarantee frequent food turnover. I used to go to such a buffet in Bellevue WA (The Eating Factory) that was pretty good in this regard. Oh yeah, that buffet also excelled in maxing the cheap filler foods up front/pricey target foods in back strategy. You could tell who were the newbie customers and who the veterans at this place by how much room was left on their plates by the time they reached the sushi station at the very end of the line.

--As with any other Asian restaurants, the presence of customers of Asian heritage is a major (though hardly foolproof) clue as to the quality of the establishment.

--Above all, it's important to set one's expectations properly. You're gonna encounter lots of Americanized Chinese restaurant fare; but how you play the right buffet dictates whether you get better or worse exemplars of that kind of fare.

Edited January 1, 2007 by mizducky (log)

[friedclams]

Eating strategy for hot or cold items which have reside of some kind (shells, bones, etc) must include taking an extra garbage plate back to the table.

I find no reason not to take two plates of cold items back to the table at the proper refilling/fresh moment, eg, freshly shucked oysters I always take 2 plates or as many dozens I can fit on two plates and under each is an extra shell reside/garbage plate.

Anyone who enters a buffet immediately taking food without scouting the entire region of gluttony to identify the premium items shall hereby forever be called a buffet-buffoon.

[markk]

The best way to get the least-plentiful (i.e. "premium") items is to ask. And I wouldn't wait a long time to do it either. I mean, if you assume that the lobster or the peking duck will be coming soon, you may wind up waiting 30 minutes and then wishing you'd asked sooner. If I don't find what I came for, I ask immediately.

And to be perfectly honest, if I see fossilized dregs of an item, or at any rate, remainders of an item that are too old for anybody to take, I take them (and leave them uneaten on plates at my table), because for sure, they're going to feel justified in not making more of something while there's still some of it left on the buffet.

I have experience with 4 different Chinese buffets, each of which has different "premium" items, and all of which differ in the size of the operation.

I find that asking the runners does no good whatsoever - they merely carry out what the kitchen prepares. The only thing that helps is to identify a manager (at the larger operations), or the person who seems to be in charge at the smaller ones, and to ask them. I also find that at the first request, you may be told "it's coming", without them conveying any message to the kitchen at all. But I'd also tell you that if the item you requested doesn't come out within a very few minutes, to present yourself to that person and let him (or her) know that the item never appeared. This always works for me. I certainly don't wait more than five minutes before I ask again.

At the various Chinese buffets I go to, the premium items are lobster (sometimes), blue crabs (not snow crab claws), Peking duck, dim sum dumplings, and for me especially, real Chinese green vegetables. I can easily make an enjoyable dinner out of crabs, duck, and greens.

There's one buffet I go to that has excellent duck, and they're frequently stingy with it. There's a display of those fluffy white steamed buns at the duck station, but I don't take them because I don't like them. Once when I went back for more duck, the fellow told me that I "had" to take buns, becuause I couldn't have just duck. So I took as many buns (spread with hoisin sauce and scallions) as I wanted pieces of duck, and only ate the duck when I got back to the table. (I mean, it's their rules. If they want to waste food, which I'm opposed to, by insisting that I take it, I will, but of course, they can't come to the table and force me to eat it).

I find that at the places I go, these items are usually quite good. And while there may be 50 other items that they want you to fill up on, I just never take those.

But I hope this answered the question about how to get the good stuff - start asking for it as soon as you get there and there isn't any, and don't wait more than a few minutes until you ask again.

[Shalmanese]

Do buffets where you are not charge for excessive wastage? The ones I'm familiar with always charge a certain amount per 100 grams of wasted food.

[markk]

Do buffets where you are not charge for excessive wastage? The ones I'm familiar with always charge a certain amount per 100 grams of wasted food.

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Some of the buffets do have signs that say "you will be charged for wasted food", but I've never seen that hapen - and it certainly has not happened to me.

But I must say - if the guy at the duck station tells me that I must take a bun for every piece of duck I get, then it's entirely their fault that the food gets wasted, and I pity the person who might try to make it my fault, or charge me.

And on a related note, I sometimes take a small sample of many things from a new buffet, and certainly don't eat the things I don't like, so if they tried to tell me that that was "waste", they wouldn't get very far either.

But how does it work where you are? Do they actually come around and inspect the plates and weigh what you haven't eaten? And are they so picky as to judge "waste" in 100 gram increments? That could be a few bites of various things that you didn't like! (As opposed to somebody with 'big eyes' simply taking extra pounds of food that goes to waste uneaten, I mean.)

Edited January 2, 2007 by markk (log)

[annecros]

I've actually had good, fresh sushi here:

http://www.gocrazybuffet.com/

I go there once a year when an old friend comes to visit. We make funny faces and giggle about the "Craaaaaaaa-See Buffet!" It's a bonding ritual.

It is definitely one of those places that wearing tennis shoes and taking a hike to the back pays dividends.

The "Z" in "Crazy" is backwards in all the marketing material. I guess that's what makes it CRAZY!

I must admit to prefering the hibachi to the sushi station, though.

Edited January 2, 2007 by annecros (log)

[annecros]

Do buffets where you are not charge for excessive wastage? The ones I'm familiar with always charge a certain amount per 100 grams of wasted food.

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Some of the buffets do have signs that say "you will be charged for wasted food", but I've never seen that hapen - and it certainly has not happened to me.

But I must say - if the guy at the duck station tells me that I must take a bun for every piece of duck I get, then it's entirely their fault that the food gets wasted, and I pity the person who might try to make it my fault, or charge me.

And on a related note, I sometimes take a small sample of many things from a new buffet, and certainly don't eat the things I don't like, so if they tried to tell me that that was "waste", they wouldn't get very far either.

But how does it work where you are? Do they actually come around and inspect the plates and weigh what you haven't eaten? And are they so picky as to judge "waste" in 100 gram increments? That could be a few bites of various things that you didn't like! (As opposed to somebody with 'big eyes' simply taking extra pounds of food that goes to waste uneaten, I mean.)

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I'd like to see them try to charge me for wastage. Not gonna happen.

Of course, I try to eat everything I pull off the buffet, but sometimes you end up on the short end of the russian roullette game, and some things are just not edible.

[annecros]

Anyone who enters a buffet immediately taking food without scouting the entire region of gluttony to identify the premium items shall hereby forever be called a buffet-buffoon.

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I think this qualifies as a caveat. Wise words, my friend, wise words.

I love it, thanks for giving me a giggle!

[porkpa]

Nothing could be truer. Just as in real estate the key is location, location and location, the key to successful buffeteering is reconaissance, reconaissance and reconaissance.

[slkinsey]

No one has said much about Indian buffets. Indian food strikes me as one that lends itself to buffet dining much more than Chinese, because it relies far less on a la minute preparation. Almost any long-braised dish will be okay in a buffet setting, and there are plenty to choose from in Indian (or, rather, Indian adapted for a buffet in America) cookery. Roti Boti in Jaskson Heights is a good example (although it's more of a steam-table place than a buffet, per se).

[Fat Guy]

Yes, I actually was inspired to start this topic by a buffet meal at Indian Taj in Jackson Heights last Thursday night ($7.99 and several items were quite tasty). I definitely agree that the curry caserole-type dishes do really well on the buffet/steam table. Still, you have to use all the strategies above with the rest of the food. For example, the naan situation has to be monitored, as does the replenishment of the tandoori chicken, and especially those fried potato rounds that are only good for about five minutes after they come out from the kitchen.

[budrichard]

The ONLY buffet I will attend to is an Indian buffet on Devon st in Chicago, Sher-a-Punjab. The Tandoori chicken and breads are made to your order and brought to you table while the other items are available buffet style. The quality is excellent!

All other buffets I learned long ago are for gourmands rather than gourmets. Lack of correct ingrediants to hold costs down, lack of fresh ingrediants for the same reason, sanitary conditions and a herd mentality all combine to make the experience slightly sickening.-Dick

[TongoRad]

I don't go to nearly as many Indian buffets lately as I was during the 90's, but in the past few years I have noticed that the naan situation has improved pretty much across the board (my region includes northern NJ, NYC and Long Island), where you will generally get a fresh order brought to your table. As to the Tandoori Chicken, a friend and I used to be of the opinion that a certain place's version was renowned to be the best simply because it was refreshed almost continuously. Other than that it was pretty ordinary.

I think an overall problem with the buffets is that there are only a few 'meat' dishes available, and they are usually selected or prepared to have a universal appeal- toned down flavors, all white meat chicken, not served on the bone, etc. The upside is that the vegetarian dishes are where a good place will usually connect. Quite a few of these, a regal sarson-ka-saag in Edgewater, and outstanding aloo gobi in Hicksville, etc., have stayed in my memory years afterwards while everything else is a blur. I don't know if you are going to get the better value, but to me the better meal is gotten by going all or mostly vegetarian at the buffet. (The exception being another place in Queens that is known for their butter chicken, and always has it on the buffet).

[annecros]

Nothing could be truer. Just as in real estate the key is location, location and location, the key to successful buffeteering is reconaissance, reconaissance and reconaissance.

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Love it.

How would one pronounce "buffeteering"? I think I would favor a silent "t", sort of like the silent or slurred "g" in Target.

Just sounds better.

BOO-FAY-earing.

This topic is making me hungry. Fried rice for dinner.

Edited January 2, 2007 by annecros (log)

[Human Bean]

Gimme the protein; mizducky can have the veggies, except for the gai lan and long beans, those are mine.

The one thing I don't like about the buffets around here is the crab legs (if they serve crab legs) - they are inevitably snow crab legs. Too much work for too little reward. I guess that leaves more for someone who might actually like them, or don't generally know that there are better crabs available (just not at the buffet).

[mizducky]

I enjoy a good Indian buffet, and the ones around here have licked the na'an problem by bringing a freshly-made batch to your table rather than letting the stuff languish on the buffet table. There are two reasons I don't currently do Indian buffets more often:

1. All the heavy--and tempting!--starches, meats, and gravied foods make it a bit more challenging for me to put together a meal that works with my health regimen Although I do have a couple of all-vegetarian Indian buffets in my rotation that make this situation a bit more manageable.

2. I confess to getting a little bored with standard Americanized Indian restaurant cuisine. Although I do know of a buffet in town specializing in southern Indian/Madras style foods which is a refreshing change of pace in this regard.

While Indian cuisine may seem to be better built for longevity in a steam table, in my experience it really doesn't fare all that much better than Chinese cuisine. Tandoori chicken can get unpleasantly dry; sauces and dals lose moisture and get unappetizingly gluey; samosa crusts get soggy and pakoras get greasy ... so you still have to use all your best mad buffet skillz to get the good stuff at the right moment.

Bringing in another regional cuisine: There's a Korean lunch buffet I like to frequent on occasion--it's not the best Korean food in the world by a long shot, but there's something to be said for all-you-can-eat panchan.

Oh, and I haven't been yet, but I hear good things about a Filipino combination buffet/turo-turo restaurant south of San Diego down in National City. Knowing how meat-centric Pinoy food can be, I'll definitely have to save up a bunch of food-slack before I go ... but hey, anything to further the cause ...

[Toliver]

Aside from eschewing the bread-noodles-rice, I also suggest limiting your beverage intake, at least during the beginning portion of your dining experience. Liquids fill you up rapidly. They'll gladly refilll your glass...it costs pennies to do so and you'll have less room for those pot stickers they just brought out from the kitchen.

The local chinese buffet I like used to be a regular chinese restaurant that served great food. Their buffet items never change (so no specialty items) but you can still order off the menu if you're craving something not in the buffet.

Busloads of Japanese tourists (heading for the nearby Indian casinos) regularly stop to eat at this buffet which is why they added sushi.

Another tip...bring a jacket or sweater. Some buffet restaurants crank up the A/C in an attempt to move the diners out quicker.

[Octaveman]

there's a Thai buffet I'm quite fond of

Who and where please.

[misstenacity]

Do buffets where you are not charge for excessive wastage? The ones I'm familiar with always charge a certain amount per 100 grams of wasted food.

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Some of the buffets do have signs that say "you will be charged for wasted food", but I've never seen that hapen - and it certainly has not happened to me.

The only time I have seen this is at an AYCE sushi house - not a buffet. The rolls and nigiri were all you can eat, but if you picked the fish off the nigiri and left rice behind, they added the price of those pieces on top of your bill. So, $19.95 tab plus $4 for those two salmon nigiri and $7 for that mackerel.... it adds up!

Regarding the strategies for buffets, the rule I've found to be the most predictive of a good dining experience is the first one on the list - get there when everything is brand-spanking-new. Even if you have to eat lunch at 11 a.m., it's worth it. My trips to a local Chinese buffet have been worlds apart due to good timing once and bad timing other occasions...

Andrea