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Why I Despise Passover, Thanksgiving, Christmas


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Two issues at hand. First of all, no-one can hate "the holidays" (whatever, wherever and no matter whether related to religion, a national or local setting)

more than those of us who have to write about food. Imagine having to find something new and original to say every year, year in and year out, about Passover, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Id al Fitr or Independence Day (pick your country). Enough to drive any food writer to bootleg whiskey!

Second - why is it that after 5,000 years we Jews have yet to find solutions to the "problems inherent to Passover".

All in good fun of course. I would use a smilie, even several here, but I don't like smilies.

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Ah, but it is the holidays, so you don't need to find something new to say every year. Just say the same contrived, traditional, sappy bits, year, after year, after year, call it tradition, and people will be happy.

He don't mix meat and dairy,

He don't eat humble pie,

So sing a miserere

And hang the bastard high!

- Richard Wilbur and John LaTouche from Candide

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This reminds me of the ubiquitous Korean plastic food towers at birthday celebrations and weddings. The faux foods are too expensive to make these days, especially considering that the foodstuffs in question never really tasted that good and nobody really wants to eat them anymore even if they were real.

Sure enough my parents rent them (yes they are available to rent) for every 100 day celebration, every dor (1st birthday)...

Most people don't even know what the foods in those towers is called anymore, not even the duk (rice cake) shops who rent them.

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...Imagine having to find something new and original to say every year, year in and year out, about Passover, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Id al Fitr or Independence Day (pick your country). Enough to drive any food writer to bootleg whiskey!

You've been approaching it from the wrong angle. Write one (excellent) column for each holiday and then re-run it as each respective holiday rolls around again, labeling it as that "cherised classic holiday essay". That should relieve some of the stress and get you a day off, too, if you work it right. :wink:

 

“Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.”

– From Fox TV’s “Family Guy”

 

Tim Oliver

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This reminds me of the ubiquitous Korean plastic food towers at birthday celebrations and weddings. The faux foods are too expensive to make these days, especially considering that the foodstuffs in question never really tasted that good and nobody really wants to eat them anymore even if they were real...

and then there's all the 'traditional' foods around the world that get bought en masse due to the pressure of ritual, but never eaten: mooncakes in China, fruitcakes in Europe and North America...

"The cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears, or the ocean."

--Isak Dinesen

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Second - why is it that after 5,000 years we Jews have yet to find solutions to the "problems inherent to Passover". 

Such as?

I have no problems with Passover.... (I'd insert a smilie but you don't like them)

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Pam, Hi.....

Just take a look at some of the threads on this page where people seem to be hunting with almost a sense of desparation to find Passover appropriate desserts, solutions to eating too much matzot, complaints about gefilte fish.... I think you'l find about 500 kvetching people to every one who chooses to qvell.

By the way, I never mind when other people use smilies. They're just not me.

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Pam, Hi.....

Just take a look at some of the threads on this page where people seem to be hunting with almost a sense of desparation to find Passover appropriate desserts, solutions to eating too much matzot, complaints about gefilte fish.... I think you'l find about 500 kvetching people to every one who chooses to qvell.

By the way, I never mind when other people use smilies.  They're just not me.

Hi Daniel,

I love those threads... those are just the threads for a kosher cookbook and recipe column writer :wink:

Seriously, yes - I understand how it becomes the same old same old. From my standpoint, recipe writing, it makes it interesting for me to try to come up with different recipes for all of the holidays. As a reviewer or a food writer (not necessarily a recipe writer) I imagine it can get rather tedious to come up with new facets to things that have been discussed for centuries.

Mind you, I'm new to the game - I'll get back to you in a couple of years

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Although I can fully empathize and sympathize with your "predicament", Rogov, I have been the recipient of newfound joys, even pleasures which heretofore went unexperienced over the holidays ... how so? :rolleyes:

In looking for ways to leverage the newest technologies to create variations upon a theme ... how does that "play out" in a realtime sense?

My immersion blender ... what can it do to pick up the theme of gefilte fish? Of charain? Can it offer a new dimension to my vegetables?

My microplaner brings me various grated citrus rinds to pep up sauces for my entrees ...

The Cuisinart Ice Cream/sorbet maker offers me different frozen concoctions to add to existing dishes ...

So, the holidays need no longer be merely repetitions of the amidah, so to speak ... novelty is a reward I now anticipate with real pleasure ... no longer dread ...

More kvelling than kvetching to be sure ... as for food writing about the themes of holidays? Most rabbis rehash, rework, sermons over and over, finding new passion to try some variations on a theme ...

Melissa Goodman aka "Gifted Gourmet"

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Hmm, something like the task of teaching the alphabet to a new bunch of tots every year!

I find festival food very interesting, because the food concepts may be very old, but the foods themselves change infitisemally over time.

There are always people learning about these traditions, unlikely as that may seem. It's not my Japanese husband who keeps the traditional Japanese festivals in our home, it's me. All over Japan, the same thing happens on a smaller or a larger scale - people learn the unfamiliar traditions of the communities they now live in, or adapt their own, familiar traditions to different circumstances.

However, I guess my interest in festival food is voluntary - I'm not quite so enthusiastic about adding yet another year to the 15 years that I've churned out the same advice for pilots with the first typhoon and the first snowfall of every year! :wacko::biggrin::cool:

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Two issues at hand.  First of all, no-one can hate "the holidays" (whatever, wherever and no matter whether related to religion, a national or local setting)

more than those of us who have to write about food.  Imagine having to find something new and original to say every year, year in and year out, about Passover, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Id al Fitr or Independence Day (pick your country). Enough to drive any food writer to bootleg whiskey!

Hey, next time you find yourself stuck for fresh and interesting spins on any of the big holidays, I'm sure you could find at least a few aspiring food writers here who would be more than happy to play guest columnist ... :wink:

All in good fun of course.  I would use a smilie, even several here, but I don't like smilies.

:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:

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I was chuckling when I started this thread and the chuckling continues. All of what y'all say (I like that expression) makes sense but remember...I've been writing about food and wine for about 3,645 years. Don't get me wrong......I am even willing to admit enjoying having to rise to the annual and ongoing hallenge of all of these holidays but (and I don't give a hoot what they say about changing technologies) there is just so much one can write about gefilte fish, stuffed turkeys, roast hams, and jalabis.

Keeping on truckin' and enjoying the heck out of it. Oh yes.....if we can't occasionally sit back and laugh at ourselves, at whom can we laugh?

Edited by Daniel Rogov (log)
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Anything that promotes and glorifies one group of people over another must be wrong, so out with all nationalistic or religious festivals. Such times, with their false jollity and enforced visits to or from the family are naturally peak times for depression and suicides, so this would be a humanitarian measure as well.

However keep the food, and the seasonality, but enact strict laws to prevent any Christmas (or Thanksgiving or Passover) goods being sold less than one week before the time when the festival would have been celebrated. Also extend this to dire penalties to anyone selling Asparagus or Strawberries or other seasonal foods before their local season...

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I've been writing about food and wine for about 3,645 years

So your avatar is an actual photo of you? :biggrin::wink:

The holiday merchandising makes me crazy. Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas blur into one huge store display.

I wonder if you've ever written an article about Christmas regarding traditional garb. I get a good laugh from those goofy Christmas sweaters.

Christmas around the world seems pretty obvious. In Korea for instance, Christmas Eve is a bit of a party night. When I was little hardly anyone ever celebrated it. But with the rise of converts it has become a national holiday (very loosely) of sorts, not a terribly religious one.

Also in Korea (I wonder if this is happening in other Asian countries as well) Chinese New Year and Western New Year are both celebrated now with time off for workers. This wasn't the case say 15-20 years ago.

I have no idea if you have any interest in Korea. :laugh: An article on evolving tradtions sounds pretty interesting.

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Hello JY...

I have great interest in Korea but beyond a basic knowledge of culinary styles and beverages, I have to confess to a vast ignorance of cultural-social norms, traditions and habits. Alas but many of my long years (and I did smile at your comment) have been devoted to what has been a morally hedonistic studyand participation in the lifestyles of Europe, North, Central and South America, the Middle-East and to some lesser extent to Australia-New Zealand.

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However keep the food, and the seasonality, but enact strict laws to prevent any Christmas (or Thanksgiving or Passover) goods being sold less than one week before the time when the festival would have been celebrated. Also extend this to dire penalties to anyone selling Asparagus or Strawberries or other seasonal foods before their local season...

Amen to that.

(umm... except I need my matzo meal and oil at least 2 weeks before Passover so that I can get my rolls and kugels into the freezer)

When I went to school (and lived) in the US, I was amazed that the Haloween stuff came out in August - this year the Easter eggs were in the stores in January. In addition to it being a little annoying, doesn't it take away some of that .... 'specialness' the holiday is supposed to bring?

Keeping on truckin' and enjoying the heck out of it.  Oh yes.....if we can't occasionally sit back and laugh at ourselves, at whom can we laugh?

Amen to that as well.

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This is going to sound cliche but there is something comforting about repeating the holiday traditions year after year. For all the talk about nouvelle whatever, we keep coming back to many of the traditional foods since that's what Mom, or Bubbe or whatever made and it wouldn't be (fill in name of holiday here) without it.

On the other hand, new ingredients and appliances allow recipes to be changed and improved over time. (Gawd, imagine having to grate pototoes and onions manually every Hanukkah the way Grandma did! This why the food processor was invented!)

While the writing may be same old, same old for you, remember there are those that are coming to it for the first time. A young adult away from home for the first time, someone newly married into a tradition, whatever. It may be old to you but it's really, really helpful to the newbies and comforting to the old timers. Besides, you never know what new tricks you will find. That's why after several years of taking over Passover responsibilities, and getting the routine down, I felt qualified to put together my how-to manual.

The holidays can often be daunting for the cooks and party planners. We do appreciate all the help and advice.

Oh, yeah, here's your smilie:

:biggrin:

Edited by JFLinLA (log)
So long and thanks for all the fish.
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