Asked to leave a restaurant!!!

[Wilfrid]

In a regular (non-trendy) diner, I regret to say I wouldn't be too suprised by this behavior.  I work in midtown Manhattan, and you do not have the chance to linger in a busy diner at lunchtime.  When the check comes, you are expected to pay it and move.  Since I don't much like these places, I am happy with the deal.  Stella Bella's incident was not at lunchtime, but it seems there were people waiting for tables.  It's not much fun waiting for a table when you can see that people have finsihed eating, paid the check, and are just taking their time about leaving.

Sorry Stella had a bad time, but just thought I'd throw in an alternative view.  (I think the situation in upscale restaurants is more complicated).

[pariah_kerry]

If the restaurant is that busy, it would be good policy to note on the menu that on busier times, it is policy to ask guests to let the next party in for the table.  I agree a party shouldn't be pushed out the door right after paying, but a customer needs to realize that camping out all day (remember, you are NEVER the only one to do this) decides how many customers are served.  In a tiny restaurant, it's good manners to leave upon paying- this DOES directly affect a server's income- and yes, we all want to relax and chat, but please be aware of others.  Would you want to wait over an hour and a half for a table?  I won't.

[stellabella]

In a tiny restaurant, it's good manners to leave upon paying- this DOES directly affect a server's income- and yes, we all want to relax and chat, but please be aware of others.  

what about when your server brings your check while you're still eating & drinking coffee, which is not uncommon?

and i stick to my origical complaint--as a long-time food server i feel like i know the ins and outs of the business.  the managers i had back in the day would have fired me for telling a table to leave--the customer was always right, no matter how painfully stupid.  and because i've been on the other end, i try as hard as i can not to be a stupid customer, either.

[mynamejoe]

While I understand how it affects income to the restaurant and to the server, I actually like it when the customers linger. It usually means they like the place, which means that my kitchen staff and the service staff have done their jobs well. Regarding the diner incident, had you thrown a nice right jab to her head (she's apparently not using it, anyways), then there would have been reason to ask you to leave, otherwise, this kind of thing is not done if you want repeat business. If it ever happens to you again, Stella, perhaps you should throw the punch; at least you'll know that you are leaving with cause.

[John Whiting]

The wittiest man I ever knew once had the perfect response. We were having lunch in a London health food establishment called Food For Thought. We were just finishing, less than half an hour after sitting down with a full lunch from the cafeteria-style counter, when a waitress came over and asked if we could eat more quickly, as there were people waiting. My friend looked up at her and remarked pleasantly, "I see. Lots of food, but not much thought."

[jaybee]

Cabrales: Situations where I would be very likely comply with a request to leave a table would be:,,,

When I was in third grade (eight years old) at PS 73 in the Bronx my teacher told me to leave an assembly to which I had paid 10¢ admission (I was acting rowdy).  I refused to leave, saying that I paid 10¢ to be there and (therefore) she hadn't the authority to eject me.  Money talked and I didn't walk.

(Boy, there was hell to pay when we got back to HER classroom.)

I think Cabrales has it pretty much right.  So does Stellabella.  What happened to her never happened to me.  But, as StellaBella says, maybe it' s because I'm male, tall (and large) and "older."  The restaurant owners have entered with the diner an unwrittten contract that their space is available to you as long as you have bought and paid for food. Unless a restaurant has a printed policy that politely asks diners to give up their table in a reasonable amount of time when they are finished eating (between x and y time), I believe they have no right to ask you to leave.

[Wilfrid]

Is the talk of the restaurants "rights" misleading?  Strictly speaking, I am sure Jaybee is correct - they have no "right" to ask you to leave, unless it is included in the contract in some form.

But we negotiate much of our daily lives by observing common practices rather than by standing on "rights".  Is it normal, reasonable or fair to sit in a restaurant over your empty coffee cups shooting the breeze for an hour or so while the staff wait to turn the table?  Maybe you have a "right" to do that, but I think most restaurants would try to move you on, and I don't blame them.  When I am waiting at the bar for a table to open, and I see people, their dinner long finished, taking forever to pick up the check and leave, the thought in my mind isn't usually "Well, they have a perfect right to do that" - it's "Come on, there are other people in the world."

[jaybee]

Wilfrid, I agree that I would hope people respect the needs of others and aren't so selfish and piggish as to make people wait needlessly.  Just as I would hope the guy in the left lane would slow down to let me in when he sees I have to go around a stopped car in front of me.  Experience is that most people, if given the chance will be courteous and considerate.  That's not the point of StellaBella's post.  She was impolitely and aggressively asked to leave.  My point is the place has no right to do that, having "let" the table to them for the price of whatever they ordered.  As a customer, the option to stay or leave is mine, not the proprietor's.  Sure I wouldn't selfishly keep a table when I saw a pile-up at the door.  But nor would I leave before I was ready or feel any obligation to hurry my meal on account of that, unless the place offered me a 15% discount for leaving within a certain time.  That would be a good incentive and help turn tables.

[Jaymes]

Treating customers like they are nothing to you but a billfold is shortsighted in any business.

I'd bet everything in MY billfold that StellaB & her sisters won't be going back there.

Furthermore, as they say in the business world (regarding customer service), "If you make someone happy, they'll tell a few of their friends.  If you make them unhappy, they'll tell the world."

[nyfirepatrolchef X]

Okay...my three cents (inflation yknow)

a) If I were at a name restaurant with a well known Chef, and he picked *me* to come out, sit, and chat with...hell Id go out to the kitchen and make HIS dessert!  Either that or Id ask if I could go back to the kitchen with him and help.

And anyone Id eat out with would feel the same way.

b) Being asked to leave is a no go.  But theres also common sense and decency involved...if a place is busy, and there are people waiting to be seated and eat...do the right thing and get going once youre done.  Its a restaurant, not a lounge.  

Put yourself in the position of the people waiting...how would you like it if it were reversed.  But if you are asked to leave in a manner such as those described here....id make very audible comments pertaining to seeing a mouse by the kitchen...and Id back it up with a call to the Health Department.  Even if there wasnt one.  One good turn deserves another..n'est-ce-pas?

The one time I was NOT done eating and someone started clearing...I was really spitting bullets.  

[rich]

Just got a great idea for a new restaurant - no chairs or tables! Problem solved.

By the way, there was a restaurant (one in NYC and one in LA) that served food to customers in beds (I forget the name). If you were asked to leave, would that be akin to being thrown out of bed?

[dimitri steinberg]

Today's Wall Street Journal (sorry, you have to pay to access the web version) has an article in Personal section regarding how high end restaurants are using various means to "accelerate" the dining experience. Quite interesting.

[stellabella]

there was a restaurant (one in NYC and one in LA) that served food to customers in beds

so instead of changing the tablecloth they changed the sheets?

BLLLLEEEEEHHHHHHHHH

[rich]

It's true, does anyone remember the name. There was a large column in the NY Times about it (maybe 2-3 years ago).

SB - could you translate BLLLLEEEEEHHHHHHHHH. Please?

[Suzanne F]

I think it was called ... B. E. D. No, really.

And since when does BLLLLEEEEEHHHHHHHHH need translation???

[rich]

It was such a difficult name, no wonder I fogot it.

You're right Suzanne. Actually, I should have asked how it's pronounced.

[Jaymes]

Today's Wall Street Journal (sorry, you have to pay to access the web version) has an article in Personal section regarding how high end restaurants are using various means to "accelerate" the dining experience.  Quite interesting.

Didn't read the Wall Street Journal article, so don't know if they commented upon this or not....

But, I have read that one reason why so many mid-level restaurants now insist on blasting untolerably loud "theme" music at you is because studies have shown that the higher the noise level, the less likely you are to stick around.

[dimitri steinberg]

The writer did comment on one restaurant where the combination of music and dancers bumping into their table made leaving quickly a desirable outcome.

[Toliver]

I came across this thread and thought I would bump it back up. This sort of happened to me except that I was the person out in the lobby waiting for you to leave so I could have my table.

Every year I go to Las Vegas to attend a convention with coworkers. We always try to eat at least one "chi-chi" restaurant (instead of the usual Vegas buffet) and two years ago we thought we'd give Emeril's place in the MGM a try.

Our reservations were for 8pm. There was about 8 of us in the group. We arrived 15 minutes early in case they could seat us earlier.

After 8pm came and went and we weren't seated, we asked the maitre'd if there was a problem. He replied that the group who had our table had just ordered dessert. At 9pm we were told by the maitre'd that the group sitting at our table weren't going to be leaving anytime soon since they just ordered another bottle of wine.

We asked to be seated since we'd been standing around for an hour and 15 minutes. So they seated us in the smoking section.

Now to some of you, this may not sound like a big deal. But no one in our group smoked. Plus, we're all from California where, thanks to the great smoking laws, we haven't had to inhale cigarette smoke with our food for a decade or two.

Basically we were told that this table in the smoking section was all they had to offer us...take it or leave it.

Since we were with some people who really had their hearts set on eating at Emeril's we stayed but I was fuming mad (no smoking section pun intended).

Needless to say, we won't ever go back to Emeril's at the MGM unless he's paying.

And even then, he'd have to cut my meat for me.

All because the people who were at "our" table wouldn't leave.

Ideally, management should have shuffled table assignments/reservations around and seated us earlier, but perhaps the staff couldn't handle the math involved in figuring out how to successfully combine tables to seat a large group.

[jmcgrath]

I had a similar experience, but unfortunately it was at a restaurant with which I had fallen in love. The setting was a now extinct restaurant which I will not name in Cambridge, MA. It was fairly upscale, with prices to match, but not out of line. I dined there frequently, but not often enough to be known to the owners.

One evening, I met for dinner with friends. They had an outdoor dining area which we requested and where we were seated. Service was extremely slow, however the food was excellent and the waitress apologized for the service because of understaffing. It was not a problem. The companionship and the weather distracted us from the wait between courses.

Things came to a horrible conclusion when we were about half way through our coffees. The owner came out and said we were taking too long and that there were people waiting for our table. We got up and followed him inside where I explained it a very loud voice how he had ruined our meals, and that the fault of our lengthy meal was his and not ours.

I also called friends to whom I had recommended the restaurant and related my experience. I'm sure they called others. I wish I could claim responsibility for the fact they are no longer in business, but doubt that is the case.

Jim

[josephreese]

I haven't been asked to leave a restaurant. I imagine that I'd just pay and leave quietly if I were asked politely. If I were told to leave, I'd probably not leave so quietly, but I'd still leave. In either case, I'd never return. Not out of spite, but because being asked to leave doesn't mesh with my idea of dining. Knowing that a particular place chooses to ask its patrons to leave makes my choice of where to dine a little easier the next time.

It's about finding the right fit, for both parties. The restaurant management doesn't want me to return any more than I'd want to return. While the immediate situation of being asked to leave is somewhat brutish, the end result is copacetic

Edited January 28, 2004 by josephreese (log)