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"You put your lobster in my steer!"


Ellen Shapiro
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So there I was driving Fat Guy and Momo around Gastonia, NC, in search of lunch, only to learn that all the places we wanted to go are closed on Mondays and Tuesdays, when I spied this sign alongside the road:

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Now read that carefully. It's so full of linguistic wonderment, I can't remember the last time I took so much pleasure from six (depending on how you count them) words.

I cut off several large SUVs, pickups, a wrecker (see I'm learning the southern lingo) and a cement truck in order to make the right turn into the Super Buffet Hong Kong Lob-Steer Inn.

We resolved to eat there, for storytelling value, provided it met a certain basic standard. A low standard even for a small-town buffet; we're not picky. We would do it, for our fellow eGulleters, under almost any circumstances.

Our first hurdle was that, after turning into the shopping center adjacent to the road sign, we couldn't find the place. Finally, after driving around a bit, we noticed, suspended from a fence, past the TJ Maxx, this sign:

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We navigated the back part of the lot and finally found the place.

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Upon entering, it felt as though we had walked into a 20-year-old pu-pu platter. Unfortunately, the food on the buffet looked as though it had come from that same platter and been kept warm by sterno all that time. So, we just couldn't do it. Not even for $4.95 per person all-you-can-eat. Not even with the $1 off coupons that the cashier offered us in an attempt to sway us.

So we did not get to have storytelling value. But, as a final bonus, we noticed the restaurant's logo on the side of the building on the way out:

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Momo was unphased by it all:

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Can you tell I'm bored?

Ellen Shapiro

www.byellen.com

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Ellen:

Have you considered writing a BOOK about "Himself" is Writing his Book?

It may be a best seller as the adventures keep growing.

Curious about how the local cooking is effecting everyones weight?

Next few chapters would be interesting from small town Louisiana, Next the Florida Texas Panhandle and so on. Everyone should have the chance to experience alternate cuisines while doing research and deducting the costs as legitimate expenses. I did it for many years and eventually ended my journey weighing 485 pounds together with my wife who out ate me and remained 125 pounds.

Now I'm rarely traveling and weigh on 188 pounds but consider my recommendation.

Irwin :biggrin:

I don't say that I do. But don't let it get around that I don't.

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What were you guys thinking?

"Chinese Buffet" belongs in the Oxymoronic Hall of Fame.

PJ

BTW Are these abominations native to the the SE US or do they fester throughout the country?

"Epater les bourgeois."

--Lester Bangs via Bruce Sterling

(Dori Bangs)

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They're universal, and there are even some in New York's Chinatowns. One of them, East Buffet in Flushing, is actually excellent.

We saw a lot of signs today. Early in the day we saw one that said "Landfill Wanted." And then later, we saw one that said "Free Dirt." Tomorrow I'm going to go tell the "Landfill Wanted" guy about the "Free Dirt" guy. Surely this is the right thing to do.

Steven A. Shaw aka "Fat Guy"
Co-founder, Society for Culinary Arts & Letters, sshaw@egstaff.org
Proud signatory to the eG Ethics code
Director, New Media Studies, International Culinary Center (take my food-blogging course)

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We saw a lot of signs today. Early in the day we saw one that said "Landfill Wanted." And then later, we saw one that said "Free Dirt." Tomorrow I'm going to go tell the "Landfill Wanted" guy about the "Free Dirt" guy. Surely this is the right thing to do.

Next you'll be working on matching up bachelors and bachelorettes.

Herb aka "herbacidal"

Tom is not my friend.

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We saw a lot of signs today. Early in the day we saw one that said "Landfill Wanted." And then later, we saw one that said "Free Dirt." Tomorrow I'm going to go tell the "Landfill Wanted" guy about the "Free Dirt" guy. Surely this is the right thing to do.

From my experience it's usually the same person.

PJ

"Epater les bourgeois."

--Lester Bangs via Bruce Sterling

(Dori Bangs)

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Pedants.

And is that a new vehicle???

It's our friend's Jeep. We traded for the week because our van can't handle the snow and mud out here, whereas he lives on paved roads in Gastonia.

Steven A. Shaw aka "Fat Guy"
Co-founder, Society for Culinary Arts & Letters, sshaw@egstaff.org
Proud signatory to the eG Ethics code
Director, New Media Studies, International Culinary Center (take my food-blogging course)

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