Picky Eater Help

[kiliki]

Amazing-I have a 36 y.o. girlfriend who is exactly the same way. She doesn't chalk it up to any childhood eating traumas, and I've always thought there was something different about the way she tastes food. After all, we know there are supertasters and that small children have different ways of tasting foods, so it's not unreasonable to think that some adults have something different about their physiology that makes them exceptionally picky. She would never allow someone to make something special for her at a dinner party, however. That's asking way to much of the host.

[Megan Blocker]

I've revised my views on picky eaters...a bit!

I've come to think that picky people probably are (or were once) more sensitive to tastes or textures, so the important point is how they incorporate pickiness into their eating habits - are they preemptive-defensive picky or merely cautious-but-not-incurious picky?

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I think that's probably true of some, and not of others. It's got to be physical in some people, purely psychological in others, and just plain stubbornness in a few.

For instance, I grew up HATING cheese and fish. I'd eat pretty much anything but cheese and fish. I am a very adventurous eater these days, and will eat some fish and some cheeses (and even love several of each), having re-tried everything I so disliked in my childhood. But I still dislike many things in both categories - they produce actual nausea when I eat them. It's not for lack of effort, either. I can't tell you how many top-tier bleu cheeses I've choked down in my day.

However, I know other people who just won't try things, and nothing makes me more frustrated. I understand not wanting to eat something twice, but to not even try it once? Tastes change over time (babies can't even taste certain things for the first few months of life), so there's no reason not to re-visit your dislikes every once in a while.

Edited July 11, 2005 by Megan Blocker (log)

[halloweencat]

< quote >

It's got to be physical in some people, purely psychological in others, and just plain stubbornness in a few.

< / quote >

i think this is a sound statement ('tho i would add that even for the "stubborn" -- and how is an outsider supposed to delve into someone's soul to determine that? -- i think people are entitled to make choices about what they put in their mouths, so there's +nothing+ wrong with that).

i'll also add that food is a control issue for many, even if they're not willing to discuss this openly with others.

from just managing one's life or weight if one feels a bit out of control, to folks who have bullemia or anorexia, people make choices that may seem odd to others, or restricting, but are no less valid.

i think it's best to let the "picky eaters" be, and not force or goad them into anything. a good tactic may be to assure them that any time they want to explore, one would be happy to make them something or help them choose.

also, regarding "tasting everything at least once"...while this may be considered a virtue by many, i don't think it's intrinsically a virtue. lots of folks get by quite nicely and enjoy themselves quite thoroughly knowng that they would never voluntarily eat a variety of things that others might (organ meats, dogs, insects, okra, etc.).

cheers :)

hc