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Really, Really Bad Cocktail Names

Chris Amirault

By Chris Amirault
in Spirits & Cocktails

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Chris Amirault

Chris Amirault

Posted
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I just saw an ad for -- I'm not joking -- sweet tea vodka, heading for a likker store shelf near you. In the ad, some flak offered a recipe. Instead of saying the obvious ("Perfect for those workaday mornings when your iced tea isn't quite enough"), they invented a Mojito riff called, that's right, the Moteato.

Perhaps you never thought you'd see the word "teat" buried in a drink name but have similarly appalling names to share. I admit I'm speechless.

Chris Amirault

eG Ethics Signatory

Sir Luscious got gator belts and patty melts

slkinsey

slkinsey

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I don't even know if this drink exists, but it's the name I've coined for the prototypical bullcrap "Asian fusian" cocktail: The Shisohito

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thirtyoneknots

thirtyoneknots

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Worst part is that there are at least two different 'sweet tea' vodkas on the market that I know of. When samples were brought for us to try the main selling point was that it didnt even taste like alcohol! Oh boy!

Andy Arrington

Journeyman Drinksmith

Twitter--@LoneStarBarman

Deacon

Deacon

Posted
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Worst part is that there are at least two different 'sweet tea' vodkas on the market . . .

And I thought Three Olives was scraping the bottom of the barrel with root beer flavored vodka. Who drinks this stuff? :blink:

KD1191

KD1191

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Posted

On the original topic, I always cringe slightly when I see a Tequila Mockingbird.

True rye and true bourbon wake delight like any great wine...dignify man as possessing a palate that responds to them and ennoble his soul as shimmering with the response.

DeVoto, The Hour

brinza

brinza

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My vote goes to BLOODY BUTRUM. I mean who the hell thought this could possibly be an appetizing name for a cocktail? I don't care what's in it; I don't care whether it's good; I just don't want to know. icon8.gif

Mike

"The mixing of whiskey, bitters, and sugar represents a turning point, as decisive for American drinking habits as the discovery of three-point perspective was for Renaissance painting." -- William Grimes

Yojimbo

Yojimbo

Posted
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There are any number of 70s' drinks whose names are even worse than their ingredients -- Freddy Fudpucker, anyone?

(Actually, Gary Regan sez it's not as bad as it sounds, but with a name like that . . . . .)

"The thirst for water is a primitive one. Thirst for wine means culture, and thirst for a cocktail is its highest expression."

Pepe Carvalho, The Buenos Aires Quintet by Manuel Vazquez Montalban

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