HELP! Dairy Free Suggestions

[reggie_212]

I'm going on a date with a great woman who unfortunately for the next week has a restricted diet. She can't eat dairy, can't have salt, and can't have soy products. I have no clue where to take her. Does anyone have any decent suggestions for restaurants where there would be dishes conforming to her diet? Thanks in advance.

[kathryn]

Indian (sans dairy products)? Or maybe Chinese if you order carefully (no soy sauce, no tofu)?

Salad?

Edited November 29, 2007 by kathryn (log)

[gfjane]

Reggie, my partner is celiac (can't have gluten) and am intolerant of dairy and corn, so we do this dance a lot.

We've eaten in about every type of place. It depends on her level of sensitivity, but I'd opt for assuming she doesn't/cannot even have a bit of it. We have found that most chain restaurants are immediately out. They rarely know what's in anything as much comes prepackaged. Or, they want to make you a plain salad with no dressing and a dry chicken breast. Jeez, I don't even eat that at home, let alone when I'm paying for my food! Next off the list are places where the staff doesn't speak the language you speak and fluently. The server will nod yes, but has no clue what you said.

So, my first piece of advice would be to call ahead at least a week and make sure that the place is willing to help you. I can see how hard it is to handle these things in a restaurant, so appreciate it if someone is honest and say, "Sorry, no can do." At least I know not to try.

My next piece of advice is to ask any friends you have if they know of any places that are happy to work with customers with food sensitivities. For example, in Chicago there is a chain of places run by Lettuce Entertain You. They all are extremely careful, so we know we can go to any of them. But, places like that are hard to find.

And, related to all of this is the time of day you go: try not to go at 8 PM on Saturday (or whatever the busiest time is in NY). They just are too busy to help. Going early or late or on a weeknight or Sunday may not be the best date time, but it may mean the difference between her eating something she likes or having salad with no dressing.

If you have to wing it, here is my take on some of the various cuisines.

While dairy isn't used much in some Asian cuisines, soy and salt are. Since woks are not scrubbed, many people with allergies/sensitivities will not eat at a Chinese, Thai, etc. place where woks are the main mode of cooking. To me, much of this area of the world uses soy based sauces that can be hard to avoid, so I'd not even chance it. A sushi place might work, but I wouldn't take someone there unless I knew they liked it.

We have good luck at Indian avoiding gluten, but not dairy. Dairy is used in a lot of food (ghee and milk products), so you'd have to ask a lot of questions. Also, a lot of Indian food is simmered for long periods, so there would be many things she couldn't have.

Mexican is a possibility, but the sodium would be hard as many things are in sauces that have been premade - and I've even seen soy sauce used in Mexican food.

Raw food would actually work well, but again, it's not something everyone likes.

When traveling in the US and trying to make sure he doesn't get sick, we tend to stick to the mid to higher priced finer dining, either American or fusion or bistro type place. Iin most large cities in the US and Canada, we can find a good restaurant where the chef or sous chef will come out and actually talk to us, clarify the issues, and often either slightly change the way an entrée is made or make something to order. These are the places that are most likely to "get it" - that this is important and her wellbeing depends on their being careful. So, as you are in New York, that shouldn't be a problem at all.

If you can call ahead of time, they might even make a special menu for her (one of the local restaurants here in Chicago does this for me every time we go). This doesn't have to be $100 a plate entrée or higher, but many places where the entrées start at $15-$20 range are this accommodating for us.

One other option is to ask her what type of food she really likes or the type of restaurant she'd love to go to. She might really appreciate it that you want to do this right and are ensuring that you get it right. If it were me and I had to avoid those things, I'd want someone to ask me so I could help guide him and avoid any dining disasters. But, this sounds like it's new to her, too, and she might not know.

Lastly, there may be an organization in your neck of the woods that helps people with food sensitivities and they may keep a list of restaurants that are helpful/supportive/friendly to people in this situation. When I travel, I often do an online search to find any local celiac organization. This actually might even help you as many celiacs are dairy intolerant initially, so a restaurant list might include that. Regardless, it will include restaurants that are willing to help out a celiac, so are also probably willing to help out your date.

And, what a great guy you are to not be daunted by this. As someone with some intolerances, I can remember how hard it was to date and how much explaining I had to do. Often you don't want to have to explain your body's reactions! People can be so insular and not realize how insensitive they are when they expect everyone's life to be like theirs. (stepping off high horse now)

Good luck! Hope you have a GREAT time.

Edited November 29, 2007 by gfjane (log)

[Pan]

Indian (sans dairy products)? Or maybe Chinese if you order carefully (no soy sauce, no tofu)?

Salad?

←

I would have suggested South Indian, and they will use vegetable ghee if you ask. But the "no salt" requirement is difficult. That said, while I don't think a place with poor service would accommodate you, a place like Madras Cafe in the East Village would probably use more spices for taste in order to compensate for the lack of salt and could make a good utthapam or masala dosa that way.

[raji]

South Indian restaurants should definitely be able to accommodate you, as they are used to serving all manners of kosher, vegan, etc. not to mention the brahmins.. anything being made fresh out of the kitchen just ask for those omissions and it should still be delicious... .but is Ghee (clarified butter) dairy? Never had vegetable Ghee before...

My first suggestion, for a good date though, was going to be Japanese food. Dairy is very rarely used, so it should be obvious those few dishes which are verboten; same with salt. So then it's just a matter of making sure any tofu and soy sauce are ommitted or are on the side. You could go to sushi - fish, rice and wasabi - and a good place, she won't miss the soy sauce so much, and could ask for plum or ponzu or a "safe" sauce for some minimal flavoring.

You could do the same at one of my favorite Japanese restaurants, Aburiya Kinnosuke - this is a robatayaki which means the emphasis is fresh fish, meat and produce and everything prepared to order in an open kitchen. While soy-mirin-sugar is a common glaze, they could omit the soy for you and get you other sauces. A lot of fried/grilled stuff is often served with salt lemon and miso on the side anyway. Heck, they even got a Michelin star (not that I'm acknowledging those frogs)

http://www.aburiyakinnosuke.com/web_menu/a..._dinner.pdf.zip

Edited November 29, 2007 by raji (log)