Simple things to do, to get what you want

[highchef]

To start, I have a 21 yr. old child who went out to his first 'place' 6 months ago. We gave him the bed etc...but had to buy another bed for his brother who was taking his room. He was with me when I bought the new bed for him, but since I was keeping the frame etc..he was clueless. So I told the guy, sure, I'll buy the bed, but I'll need frame for it .can you do something for me in that????'

so..got the new frame (for the old bed) for nothing..guy threw it in.

today, with same child/man. 1 single pack of lamb chops in Sam's. 24 bucks... the packaging was not right and the chops had turned a little grey...son watches as I catch the eye of the guy behind the glass. When he comes out I asked him nicely to repackage the chops, as the wrap seemed to be comprimised. With a smile he says 'sure, mamn'..and then comes out with the chops trimmed, double wrapped, and marked off 4 bucks.

My son thinks it's charm, looks, whatever. I think it's grace, and just being nice. I tell him he can do the same things I do, just don't try too hard.

He say's I don't try at all..

I say it's just confidence.

He says that the ladies always get their way, in resturants, bars, etc.

I really think that what I do as a 40 something y/o woman means something... it's good to know that if there's a 40$ piece of meat that's brown that you can get it for less, but I also know that if a 21 yr old person walks in with some comfidence, and know that they can do the same things that I do, just by instinct, that they can do the same thing. As long as they are just being aware, and not smart ass.

The child sometimes looks at me like I'm the devil incarnate....but I know he loves me and still learns something..

what's your story? what do you tell the kids to look for in the veggie isle..what do you teach your kids about food? wash it first? ( yes) Wash your hands before you put them in that bag.(yes).

but, there are all sorts of tricks out there. even if we don't quite know we're doing, we're teaching our kids stuff. What stuff have you taught your kids?

What things do you know, that you want to write down and haven't

what do you want the kids to know?

What haven't you shown them?

What else is more important than sharing your family history and foods?

[LittleIsland]

I am trying to instill in my kids (4 yrs and 1.5 yrs - ok the younger one is a bit too young) an awareness that there are other kids out there who are not as lucky as they are, who do not get to go to bed with a full belly every night, who get fed when they are hungry, get a drink of clean water when they are thirsty, and who have a surfeit of toys and books and people who love them. A sense of empathy. Some amount of social responsibility. Of course, we are merely at the start of a long journey.

And I agree, so much easier to get what you want by being nice rather than nasty. The world doesn't owe us a living, something a lot of younger folk could stand to remember nowadays. ugh, I sound OLD

[Carrot Top]

I try to teach them that if something is "not right" - i.e. the price or packaging or quality seems "off", or if a service is done in a haphazard or inappropriate way - that you really don't have to just walk away feeling bad or feeling as if you "have to put up with it because that's the way it is."

Because if one puts up with poor service or poor performance or poor quality in their daily life, that is exactly what they will get more and more and more of - things being the way they are in the struggle for everyone to get through the day, with the usual cast of characters all of whom do not all have love for each other in their hearts.

This can translate into:

Returning a sandwich if it is made incorrectly (happens as often as it doesn't, at fast-food places)

Taking produce that is not fresh yet right there for sale in the nicer grocery stores directly to the produce manager and saying "What's going on here?" (All done with smiles, of course, but definitely without hugs.)

Talking to the manager in the meat department if they do not seem to ever have the cut you want to get. Asking if they could carry some different products, and name them specifically, telling all about how wonderful they are.

Check the grocery receipts. There was a thead on this one, started by Gifted Gourmet, some time ago. Lots of mistakes often to be found.

Find and frequent the places or environments where things *do* work right and give them your business rather than places where there seem to be ongoing problems. Thank people when things do go right and let them know you appreciate the attention they give to making the world (really, through small everyday things) a better place to be in.

And if things do *not* go as planned with all this, my kids are used to hearing me say (and by now they join right in with me albeit with rolling eyes and humorous voices added): "If that's the worst thing that happens to you today, consider yourself lucky."

Edited December 2, 2006 by Carrot Top (log)

[srhcb]

I am trying to instill in my kids (4 yrs and 1.5 yrs - ok the younger one is a bit too young) an awareness that there are other kids out there who are not as lucky as they are, who do not get to go to bed with a full belly every night, who get fed when they are hungry, get a drink of clean water when they are thirsty, and who have a surfeit of toys and books and people who love them.  A sense of empathy. Some amount of social responsibility.  Of course, we are merely at the start of a long journey. 

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I think we all grew up hearing some variation of the story about "babies in Africa", "Starving Armenians", etc.

I sure we all listened incredulously, but that doesn't prevent us from appropriating the format. My three-year old grandson, Zach, is often reminded of the "crack babies in Minneapolis" who "would be more than happy to eat the fine macaroni and cheese" he refuses.

Perhaps the fact we remember these stories and repeat them means they do have subliminal power to shape our views?

SB (wonders what African, Armenian and Crack Mothers tell their kids to get them to eat?)