Varmint's Pig Pickin'

[Varmint]

TMBG rocks. The L'il Varmints love 'em, and we have called Dial a Song from time to time.

I did get to sing a bit with Dave and was quite impressed. I will say that I have absolutely no voice today, and I blame that on 3 things: Too much pecan smoke ingested, the cold that won't go away, and singing the "Woo hoos" to Mummer's rendition of Sympathy for the Devil. Man, I had to squeeze my privates very hard to hit those notes.

[Varmint]

Yeah, I'm sorry I wasn't there for the TMBG sing-a-long.

You didn't miss much.

Maggie did know the words to the one Spike Jones cover song.

Next year Dean is taking me to the airport.

You mean the other Dean? My kids were terribly tormented by their being 2 Deans this weekend.

I'll take you to the airport, all right. You'll get Weird Al.

[Malawry]

Man, I had to squeeze my privates very hard to hit those notes.

[Dave the Cook]

Man, I had to squeeze my privates very hard to hit those notes.

Well, he couldn't get anyone else to do it.

[Malawry]

I wonder: does it feel any better than poking your eye?

[guajolote]

My kids were terribly tormented by their being 2 Deans this weekend.

This was very convenient yesterday.

My wife would ask me a question. I would ignore it. She would ask why I wasn't listening to her. My reply was "I thought you were talking to the other Dean."

[Dave the Cook]

I wonder: does it feel any better than poking your eye? 

[Dave the Cook]

My wife would ask me a question. I would ignore it. She would ask why I wasn't listening to her. My reply was "I thought you were talking to the other Dean."

Great trick! When that wears off, threaten to steal her food.

[maggiethecat]

By way of introduction: =Mark is absolutely right when he says that one writer can't do a full and accurate report of this event. Some folks were smoking on the tennis court, some were tending the gas grill, some were kitchen brigade, and others flitted from station to station. There were foraging parties for ham, basil and beer. (One of my fondest memories is the expression of disbelief and disgust on Dave's and Guajolote's faces when they discovered that Whole Paycheck doesn't carry Tabasco Sauce.)

Here's a View from the Fridge, or more accurately, a View from the Sink.

Malawry doesn't suck. At all. Her energy, good cheer and tireless effort with the kitchen brigade astonished all who had the privilege of sharing counterspace with her. Edemuth was a quiet force for all that is good and right in the kitchen. Who was the first to drag out a knife on Thursday afternoon (and the first to breach the beer fridge?) No surprise of course: that would be the King of the Heartland, Guajolote! And there is no one I would rather peel thirty pounds of potatoes with than the Mod with the Mostest, my sista' Aurora.

But the winner for the Kitchen Stud award has to go to my longtime editor and sometime collaborator, Dave the Cook. The man arrived with a truckload of every conceivable kitchen item, a sheaf of recipes, a cooler full of food and the stamina of a twenty-year-old line cook. He doesn't suck.

It was nothing but a joy to navigate the kitchen maze with these folks and the others who pitched in; they are too numerous to mention, but I treasure the memory of Scott Shorter cleaning a mountain of collards. Meals for the children (all eGullet kids are Above Average, by the way) were dispatched, bourbon sauce was heated (thank you Weka!) folks made their way through to the beer fridge…

And: As usual the eGull made flesh is always even smarter, funnier and better looking than the poster I've come to love. I can't name 'em all, because it's such a long list, but the crew that hung out near the kitchen (or hung around with the Bad Kids outside the kitchen door on smoke breaks) were Absolutely Fabulous. Katie and Blondie, I wish you lived in Chicago. Al Dente: Tall, dark, handsome and Funny! Those Shorters…

And of course, the McCords. (And the Taylors.) Dean was everywhere, making this everyone's weekend to remember. And, seriously, when I grow up I want to be like Cella McCord: Gracious, smart, organized, patient and beautiful. Thank you. Thank you.

I tasted grits for the first time. They sure don't suck.

Edited October 14, 2003 by maggiethecat (log)

[Lady T]

Man, I had to squeeze my privates very hard to hit those notes.

Well, he couldn't get anyone else to do it.

Dagburn. I just knew there was a job for me somewhere on that weekend that nobody else would do...

Teaching voice, that is. High notes aren't that hard, depending how sober you are. Or aren't.

[Suzanne F]

Re Maggie's last post: it struck me last night that "The Ballad of Varmint's Pig Pickin'" can only be written along the lines of Rashomon.

[hjshorter]

Yeah, I'm sorry I wasn't there for the TMBG sing-a-long. Their music is de rigeur in my household, we especially like singing their music to lighten the mood when we go for hikes or rake leaves together.

I just knew I liked you guys.

We have everything TMBG has ever done. Scott sings Dr Worm to the kids all the time.

[maggiethecat]

Dagburn.  I just knew there was a job for me somewhere on that weekend that nobody else would do...

Sue: You're gonna have to clean the coffee from my keyboard.

[Malawry]

Maggie, sweetie, I hope your dishpan hands have started to heal. I can't believe how much time you spent at that sink. It was such a privilege to meet you, and I'm so in love with the apron you gave me. As well as the Dark Lady who made it.

[Jaymes]

Tee hee.  That sums it all up.  Believe it or not, I'm actually getting nostalgic already!

Quick! Go talk to Dr. Mrs. Varmint. I 'spect she'll straighten you right out.

[claire797]

Yeah, I'm sorry I wasn't there for the TMBG sing-a-long. Their music is de rigeur in my household, we especially like singing their music to lighten the mood when we go for hikes or rake leaves together.

I just knew I liked you guys.

We have everything TMBG has ever done. Scott sings Dr Worm to the kids all the time.

I went bowling with them once.

[Varmint]

I told everyone well in advance how crappy my kitchen was. How maze-like it is. How impossible it might be to have more than a couple people working in it. As it turned out, everyone exploited the one positive aspect of this kitchen: the counter space. I have a butt load of counter space, and it was fully utilized. Other than that, the kitchen still sucks.

The quality and quantity of food put out by that kitchen astounded me. I think we should just open a restaurant with that kitchen. What do y'all think??

[Lady T]

Sue: You're gonna have to clean the coffee from my keyboard.

Not a problem. Bring it right on along to Grand Rapids. Once I've got it decaffeinated, we'll surely have a use for it before this crew's done.

[Dave the Cook]

I told everyone well in advance how crappy my kitchen was.  How maze-like it is.  How impossible it might be to have more than a couple people working in it.  As it turned out, everyone exploited the one positive aspect of this kitchen: the counter space.  I have a butt load of counter space, and it was fully utilized.  Other than that, the kitchen still sucks.

The quality and quantity of food put out by that kitchen astounded me.  I think we should just open a restaurant with that kitchen.  What do y'all think??   

You did warn us, but it's impossible to describe your kitchen, Varmint. Having seen it Friday morning, I tried to warn guajolote when we picked him up at the hotel. Halfway through my narrative, his eyes started to roll back into his head, so I stopped. However, when we arrived chez Varmint, he took one look and agreed that my description, for all its previously questionable credibility, was entirely accurate.

But you're right. It was in many ways a perfect kitchen for five people to prep in, especially if they were friendly. The only real crunch was for stovetop space. Although you graciously offered the use of your upstairs unit, I don't think anybody wanted to be too far away from the action.

[joler]

Well, as long as everyone is contributing their own experience....I feel perhaps I missed out on a lot of the commraderie since I didn't arrive until Saturday and by that time many of the relationships and responsibilities had already been established. I did bring my own set of professional knives and 2 chefs along, but the kitchen staff was tightly in place and there was no need for assistance where desserts were concerned as the table was already sagging.

I did manage to squeeze in at the bar long enough to pick some rabbit and chicken meat and get to know Aurora and Katie a bit, which was a pleasure, as were my post-pig conversations with Malawry and HJShorter (and her adorable son).

Mummer was perhaps the most animated and friendly person there, not to mention highly entertaining with his keyboard and accordian - I'm glad to know he made it safely home. Dean seemed exhausted (no doubt) but he, his family, and in-laws, were extremely gracious hosts.

I do wish I'd known how dessert heavy our menu was leaning because we did seem to be lacking in the appetizer and side-dish arenas. I would say the meal highlights were definitely the pork and the portabella mushrooms that =Mark made. I liked the fresh pork better than the smoked, but both were great (extremely rich). I wasn't crazy about the pork skin (too chewy), but I wonder how it would've been if we'd dropped some in the fryer and attempted to make our own rinds? I did not try the chicken or, of course, the Brunswick stew, since I wasn't there on Sunday either. (As an aside...isn't a Brunswick stew made with wild game technically a Burgoo?) The greens were good, but a bit too salty for my taste...

I was surprised to learn that there were so few of us there that are actually working in the industry. In light of this, I think it would be a good idea for e-gulleters (including myself) to post more insightful information in their profiles. When I checked the guestlist to see who was coming I noticed most folks just have their place of residence listed, some not even that much information. It would be nice to know if someone is currently cooking professionally, or professionally trained, working in some aspect of food and beverage or hospitality, or just has an avid interest.

[KatieLoeb]

But you're right. It was in many ways a perfect kitchen for five people to prep in, especially if they were friendly.

After rubbing up against everyone at every pass, those of us that weren't already "friendly" were practically family

[Dave the Cook]

But you're right. It was in many ways a perfect kitchen for five people to prep in, especially if they were friendly.

After rubbing up against everyone at every pass, those of us that weren't already "friendly" were practically family

Thanks, Katie. I couldn't figure out a way to say that, but you got it perfectly.

[Varmint]

But you're right. It was in many ways a perfect kitchen for five people to prep in, especially if they were friendly.

After rubbing up against everyone at every pass, those of us that weren't already "friendly" were practically family

Thanks, Katie. I couldn't figure out a way to say that, but you got it perfectly.

And y'all know how we treat family down here in the South!!!

[KatieLoeb]

But you're right. It was in many ways a perfect kitchen for five people to prep in, especially if they were friendly.

After rubbing up against everyone at every pass, those of us that weren't already "friendly" were practically family

Thanks, Katie. I couldn't figure out a way to say that, but you got it perfectly.

And y'all know how we treat family down here in the South!!!

It's the punch line from the hillbilly joke!:

"Send back that Virgin Bride, son! If she ain't good enough for her own family, she ain't good enough for ours!"

[Al_Dente]

But you're right. It was in many ways a perfect kitchen for five people to prep in, especially if they were friendly.

After rubbing up against everyone at every pass, those of us that weren't already "friendly" were practically family

Thanks, Katie. I couldn't figure out a way to say that, but you got it perfectly.

And y'all know how we treat family down here in the South!!!

I think I hear that banjo twang starting...

I'm still on a bit of a vacation after having attended the bbq of the century. So I'll be brief so I can head out to the beach for some more fishin in between raindrops.

I had a blast at the pig pickin. Great bunch of folks and some spectacular food. I think what amazed me the most was having so much talent working on so many great dishes in an atmosphere of teamwork and conviviality. We truly had some artists putting everything together. Having too many cooks most certainly did not spoil the soup.

Sincere thanks to Varmint and Dr Mrs Varmint for their warmth and hospitality. I regret not making it on Sunday-- I had to spend some time with my mother and then hit the road for Corolla NC.

I hope to get to see you all again soon. I know I have trips to Chicago and NYC in my future, so I'll be looking those folks up. And given that I have family near Raleigh, I know I'll be back soon.

Thanks again everyone,

Mike (or Al Dente to Betty )