Calgary versus Vancouver--Just What's at Steak?

[jamiemaw]

Backround: Many of you will have been less than amused by the recent reports of Valerie Fortney of the Calgary Herald, She's been visiting Vancouver during the playoffs to report on the seeming differences between the two cities. Instead, she dragged out every hackneyed stereotype ever known--weather, choice of footwear, mind-set et al. Particularly galling, though, was her choice of restaurant to summarize Vancouver dining: The Naam. While I enjoy a bowl of granola as much as the next guy, she painted a picture of us as Birkenstocked chumps where the hills are in fact alive with the sound of muesli.

As I doubt they'll ever print this, beneath I attach a response.

An Open letter to Valerie Fortney

The Calgary Herald

April 10, 2004

Dear Ms Fortney,

Of the many clichés that you exhumed in attempting to incite the good citizens of Calgary and Vancouver, your choice of The Naam as an exemplar for how Vancouverites dine came as a particular blow. Shame on you and your people.

Although I maintain that the malodour of composting vegetarians does not necessarily a happy dining room make, it’s not such a bad idea to keep them all in one place. And the fact that the brothers and sisters and miscellaneous comrades who choose to dine there select open-to-the-elements sandals as their footwear of choice is, quite determinedly, because they can. And being a just and tolerant society, we tolerate it, if just.

If you didn’t know before your visit, you now do: Vancouverites take the art of dining very seriously—on slower nights it’s commonly perceived as at least a spectator sport, but from Wednesday through Saturday it’s full contact. Vancouver also enjoys something that Calgary (and Toronto, for that matter) do not—a distinct regional cuisine. Close your eyes in many restaurants in Vancouver and you know that you’re eating right here. Close your eyes in most Calgary restaurants, however, and you could be virtually anywhere, such as Fort McMurray.

But here’s the rub, or at least the spice-rub. Although your metaphor of Calgary as a red meat town, and Vancouver as its tofu equivalent (lack of ram?) is proforma, it is untrue, and in the spirit of journalistic integrity, the record must be corrected: Vancouver has way more, way better steakhouses.

Yes, you might argue that Hy’s was founded in Calgary, but for the past 30 years the chain has been head-officed right here. So too its sister-chain, The Keg, owned by the same Vancouverite. I know, you’ll argue that Saltlik on Stephens is a vibrant, modern steakhouse concept. But sorry again, that’s an adjunct of Earls, also invented and head-officed here. I won’t bore you with all the rest, but at 900 West, Morton’s, Gotham, the Smoking Dog, and even Le Gavroche, amongst many others, you can get a steak far superior than at, say, Buzzard’s Cowboy or the Cattle Baron. By the way, while you're at it, you might want to do something about those names.

Now don’t even start on Japanese restaurants (there are about 260 of them in Vancouver) as I have first-hand knowledge that anything even half-baked is held in deep suspicion by Calgarians, with the possible exception of your premier. I’ll give you this though—you folks drink far more rye whiskey than we could ever think possible. Or necessary.

You see, we make good wine too. Especially those big-boy Okanagan reds from the Black Sage bench, the ones that go so well with this beef.

Yours until the cows come home,

Jamie Maw

Food Editor

Vancouver magazine

[Keith Talent]

Isn't beating up on Calgary well, kinda mean? I mean, it's Calgary. Tim Hortons and porno shops are really the only areas they can claim a legit leg up on us. I think as Vancouverites we should make an effort to fight in our weight class. And San Francisco has been strutting around, talking trash and looking pretty cocky lately...

[Coop]

Calgary? Really? Hmmm..No I thought about it and I don't care. They can think what they want about our restaurants, I have never given their's a thought. Didn't Michael Noble move there? So they must have at least one decent place. Right. Hey Jamie Maw. You have to get out more often.

[mot juste]

Exactly. And isn't it always the "journalists" who get involved in this kind of petty mudslinging? Just another excuse to show off, I suspect. Actually, the chefs and restauranteurs in each city think quite highly of each other. Com'on we have a lot to offer each other and more to accomplish if we take a more supportive attitude instead of squabbling over nothing.

[Coop]

Hey! Now just a minute! Vancouver has some porno shops too!

[Keith Talent]

Oh, we've got porno alright, just not on every freakin' street, kitty corner to a Hortons. Besides, only Calgarians would still be getting their porn on the street, when the rest of the civilized world has moved online.

[poutine]

Jaime, great letter to the Calgary Sun - way funny! Reminds me of the Montreal vs. Toronto debacles in the 80s, 90s & still to this day.

[jamiemaw]

Oh for goodness sake, Justin. Our message to (hit or) Miss Fortney was simply meant as a good-natured jibe against her trite stereotyping of the two cities. She certainly took it that way. By striking against their solar plexus of steakhouse dining, I thought the humour might have been more obvious. perhaps we were hoping that it might cheer you up too.

But Coop raises an interesting point. When Michael Noble accepted Stephen Reid's offer to become a partner at Catch several years ago it raised a lot of eyebrows here in Vancouver. Michael, after all, had put Diva squarely on the map as a serious, contemporary, regionally-driven hotel dining room. The only other one at the time was the esteemed Chartwell. And Michael was just as well known for his captaincy of the Canadian Bocuse d'Or team that did so well in Lyons. He was (and is) also widely recognized for his keen interest in the welfare and training of apprenticing chefs, and for simply being a great guy.

So in addition to raising eyebrows here, Michael's move also raised the standard of piscine dining in Calgary hugely, so much so that we soon ran a highly positive review in the Globe and Mail. I like restaurants that offer options: casual oyster saloon downstairs, more formal tasting menus up. Both great--thank Westjet. Catch, quite deservedly I think, also won enRoute magazine's inaugural award for 'Best New Restaurant in Canada' the year before last. So far from squabbling, I think you can dine very well in Calgary (and Banff for that matter). Ned Bell, also ex-Vancouver is cooking well in Cowtown at Murrieta's. You may also recall that Michael Allemeier (ex-Bishop's and FNC's Cook Like a Chef) also made a huge contribution during his tenure at Teatro. He's now installed at the Mission Hill Winery and busy sourcing great local stuff, including some Enderby boar cheeks that he braised and served to us a couple of weeks ago. Almost sorry to say it Keith, but they were great with the Oculus. Overall, it's great to see the Okanagan chefs (Rod Butters at Fresco too) working in much closer collaboration with the small, mainly organic farmers--in pursuit of excellent local ingredients. Sort of like what Bernie Casavant started a decade ago at Whistler and Pemberton when he was at the Chateau. And also ironic: a century ago the apples and stone fruit of the OK Valley were winning awards as far away as London. But it's taken that long for the valley to get back to its roots, so to speak.

So here's to more collaboration, especially between the two cities. Now that Scott Baechler's going so strongly at Diva, perhaps the Met should host a springtime homecoming dinner, with Michael and Scott working the menu together.

By the way, if you still want to taste some of Michael's emancipated cooking, but don't want to visit Calgary, order his signature black cod hash with scallion oil and poached eggs. Surely one of the best darn eating inventions of the 90s, way ahead of its time, and still available breakfast/brunch at Diva.

Off to eat Neo-Tiki in the inappropriately named Sandwich Islands, where the cuisine is chiefly informed by Spam, which is an aquired taste. I promise to avoid those burn 'n turn joints (friends had an expensive disaster at the newish Spago a couple of weeks ago) in favour of plate lunches, poki and then, with any luck at all, accelerating to ramen speed.

Cheers,

Jamie

[jamiemaw]

Thanks Poutine. Hopefully other will get it too. By the way, before we also hear from outraged vegetarians--I love them equally.

Cheers,

Jamie

[mot juste]

zzzzzzzz...oops! Is he finished yet?

Don't worry Jamie, you're always good for a laugh.

Edited April 13, 2004 by mot juste (log)

[Coop]

Jamie Good luck in Hawaii. Nice to see you on this board with somew fresh ideas. Unlike mot juste I'm hanging on every word.

[Keith Talent]

Wrong thread and all that, but holy crap are there ever some bad meals to be had in Hawaii.

I hate Hawaii. Prmarily because so many people like it, and if you want to be a contrarian, you've got to stake out some unpopular positions. I'd be happy to list why Hawaii (or Maui at least) sucks, if anyone is interested.

Suffice it to say that I'd (almost) rather spend a week in Calgary rather than Kehei. In fact, that's kinda what Maui is, isn't it? Calgary with the ocean and palm trees.

[jayhay]

Thanks Jamie, I got a laugh out of your letter to the Calgary paper. Pete McMartin had a good article in The Sun on this same topic.

[mot juste]

I would be interested to know why you say that, Keith. I haven't been there for years myself. But I was under the impression it was supposed to be getting better.

[jamiemaw]

Mahalo Coop. And as our good mothers always taught us, never get into a piscine contest, even with reporters from Calgary. That's why I chose beef.

Not unlike this website, perhaps food is all about the threads too: from farmyard to plate that is. And it's pretty much a maxim that the closer you can keep an eye on it the better it will taste. Chatters aside that is.

But here's a concept, and an invitation. How would you and Mr. Talent like to come out in a few weeks and take a peek at a couple of new restaurants? I promise that I won't make you wear the traditional Joanne Cates disguise kits. Thought you might find it informative. And we'll be sure to delegate to KT the washroom inspection bit. Sorry in advance, can't boost for Mrs. Coop on our budget, but if we turn up something good, you can rush back.

Let me know,

Jamie

"No sane man can afford to dispense with debilitating pleasures, no ascetic can be considered reliably sane." --A.J. Liebling

[paul mitchell]

I just feel so sorry for those poor Calgarians that have nothing better to throw on the ice but cow tongues (see Tuesdays National Post page A3) - at least us BC folk have a decent sockeye salmon, weathervane scallop or spotted prawn to toss onto the rink in indignation.

[jamiemaw]

Keith is bang on although surely Mrs. Talent must be at least mildly uncomfortable with the unpopular positions part. Is that like sand in your Schlitz? You really owe it to us to explain, Keith, especially as you seem to be in an uncommonly good mood today.

The state is riddled with expensive restaurants that can be unsatisfying--what one server called 'burn 'n turn': get the mahimahi out fast and turn the tables. But there are lots of casual and Asian restaurants that serve quality food at locals' prices. One of our favourites is The Smokehouse just north of Lahaina. Just Harleys and pick-up trucks in the parking lot (no rented Toyotas)--surely a good sign in front of a barbecue joint. Beer is served in frozen tankards, the ribs are slow-smoked over kiave wood, turtles hurtle into the surf.

There are several fine dining restaurants on each island, though, that are great: terrific fresh stuff and the chef knows when to get out of the way. Hawaiian regional cuisine really got going a decade or so ago, thanks to Merriman's on the Big Island, Alan Wong on Oahu, George Mavro (now moved back to Honolulu) and Bev Gannon on Maui etc. Of course Roy's really started it all, and now you see them everywhere, even in Plam Springs. But I heard that Roy's is now owned by the Outback chain of steakhouses, which might explain the rapid roll-outs.

I'll let you know how it goes--especially in that three stool Malaysian place near the airport that we sniffed out.

Cheers,

Jamie

[Keith Talent]

In such a big world with so many great places, spending any time on Maui seems odd, particularly when you factor the shitty food and high cost into things.

First, in an effort to be totally fair, I've got to disclose I despise the beach. I hate sand. How spending a day dusty, dirty and hot is pleasant is beyond me. Plus, I've recently decided to call a moratorium on swimming in the ocean. I refuse to enter an environment where I'm no longer the top predator on the food chain. I've done tons of snorkeling in Hawaii, and how seeing the exact same thing as the aquarium with the added bonus of swallowing a couple gallons of salt water and getting stung by jellyfish adds to the experience is again beyong my reasoning. The only fish I'm interested in seeing is sitting in a middle of my plate.

So that all said, and really those are the only reasons to go to Hawaii. There's nothing else there. Yes the scenery is spectacular, the air has a soft gentle feel not found many other places, and the climate is close to ideal. But the general grubbiness of the place, the local idiots asking you "smoke brudda?" more frequently than while walking down Granville, the fact that they (the town of Kehei) seemed to use the same urban planer that did Scott Road in Surrey and a lack of good food all outweigh the positives.

And the whole "Malaysian hole in the wall" arguement is misleading at best. If high quality cheap asian is your bag, flying to Hawaii passing through Richmond seems somewhat ironic. Richmond is the island with these atrributes, five hours cramped up on Air Transat seems like an unnecessary inconvenience to me, plus the fact that you could spend a week in Malaysia for the same money as a week in Maui, maybe less.

I can see Hawaii being awesome if you're Ringo Starr, ensconced in a compound sipping gin and tonis being gently buffeted by the trade breezes, but for me a week in a Kehei condo or Ka'napali high rise seems about as attractive as a long weekend in Belligham, without the cheap golf.

Not like Mexico is heaven on earth, but at least it holds the advantage of some good meals, great meals if you do your homework and cultural attractions outside of faux pineapple plantations.

[mot juste]

Thanks Keith. I always find your comments to be humourous AND original and that does brighten up my day.

(Jamie - Coop is right. Fresh ideas drive this board and your ideas are fine pal, but you’ve got to rotate those road worn puns you’ve been wheeling around on for at least 10 years. Lack of ram? Sound of muesli? Time to retire them and give them a pension.)

As for Hawaii, I have to agree. It’s always struck me as a destination for people with no imagination. At least, its never appealed much as a good place for food. Unless you are into poi and then there ARE some imaginative things you can do with that as long as you don’t swallow it.

That being said however, I’ve been under the impression that some of the food producers in the agricultural areas were doing interesting work in the way of growing fresh wasabi, raising heritage breeds of cattle...if checking out that sort of thing gets you more motivated than sand in your swim trunks then there is still something there for foodies. Not me though.

For pure entertainment value, I’ve heard the seafood auction where they flog 1,000 pound albacore tunas to the sushi agents is a bit of a blast.

[Coop]

mot juste thanks for giving me credit for being so witty but what I really meant is try some new Pho places. I'm just tired of everyone recomending Pho Hoang. That's all.

[clothier]

Calgary, Vancouver, what's the difference? The Red Wings are just going to

steam roll over either one.

[Coop]

I hope it's over soon. This town is just stupid over hockey. I love sports but I absolutly hate what NHL hockey has become. It's kind of like eating cruise ship food while watching professioal wrestling. It appeals to the lowest common denominator. Now for the next few months the TVs in bars and restaurants will be tuned into games featuring the Maple Leafs and the Bruins. It's depressing.

[Keith Talent]

C'mon, quit being such a curmudgeon. Spring hockey is the best, really the only hockey that's bearable to watch. You can't tell me there hasn't been a large measure of entertainment value in the Vancouver/Calgary series, win or lose. Yeah the lifeless hockey geeks that sit through NJ v. Philli everynight are troubling, and need to get out of the house, but to follow one series doesn't seem particularly onerous.

And lets be honest, last night, you're sitting at home, it felt pretty good to forgo The Apprentice for hockey instead didn't it? It was pleasant not to have the usual bouts of Thursday night self loathing, sitting through two hours of Survivor and The Apprentice.

Seriously though, I think those stupid Cambodian Tire Canuck flags that every rusted out 80's Festiva around town sport need to fuck right off. They are another reason to despise Canadian Tire. First that gave us that sexually ambigous fake couple in every spot, he with the beard as about the only external proof he's a man, she looking like she was pulled out pof a legion hall just before the meat draw to do the spots. These two wanderers travel the land, having adventures and fixing shit using second rate Cananian Tire tools, accompanied by a mid tempo country tinged rock tune, the level of vacuosness which hasn't been heard since Hootie and the Blowfish thankfully went away. Worst casting ever.

Go Canucks.

[clothier]

One of the things I love about living in Metro Detroit is our access to CBC. Not only do my kids love the kids programming (even if Patti gives me a headache), but we get hockey the way God and Canada intended.

Go Wings!

[Keith Talent]

One of the things I love about living in Metro Detroit is our access to CBC.

Thief.

I give money to support PBS, you should give money to me. In fact, if you subscribe as apatron of the CBC at the 90 dollar pledge level, I'll be happy to send along a premium; A signed copy of "Coop: The early postings, musings, wiiticisms and obervations from Maple Ridge's fouth favourite son." (Walker, Moore and Neely slotting above him.) I'll be ceratin to include you pledge along with my tax remiottance to help offset the burden to our tax base caused by people overusing the medical system after gouging their ears after some particularly idiotic Don Cherry spot.