El Gordo's worst kosher candy competition

[pjs]

The marshmallows are going to get thrown one way or another.

Is that meant like "in a food fight" or "into the garbage"??

"Food Fight," of course. It is one of the primary definitions of a seder.

PJ

[Gifted Gourmet]

"Food Fight," of course. It is one of the primary definitions of a seder.

PJ

Now that is truly hysterical!!

Thanks!!

[Ellen Shapiro]

Yes, there's plenty of good stuff for Passover. And of course there's plenty of home-made stuff, even better. But making fun of traditionally bad Passover candy is a tradition in itself!

This indeed is one of my very favorite parts of the holiday tradition. Because of the particular dietary restrictions of Passover, this holiday is especially promising for a little good natured self-depricating humor. I mean really, if you don't laugh about fruit slices--what are your other options? I believe that fruit slices are to Passover as Peeps are to Easter. Do I see a future for fruit slice jousting?

[bloviatrix]

There's much I don't understand about fruit slices (such as who was the genius who came up with them) but my biggest question of all is "what is that white stripe?" Blovie wants to know if that's where all the sugar is concentrated and if that's where the rock band White Stripes got its name.

[Gifted Gourmet]

There's much I don't understand about fruit slices (such as who was the genius who came up with them) but my biggest question of all is "what is that white stripe?"  Blovie wants to know if that's where all the sugar is concentrated and if that's where the rock band White Stripes got its name.

The white stripe comment is terrific!! I think it must be ersatz marshmallow to separate the inner fruity pleasure from the "rind" , in other words, pith (no laughing please!!)... it is a trompe d'oeuil feat of engineering!! Pure genius .. now all it needs is some real flavor and zing!!

Edited April 8, 2004 by Gifted Gourmet (log)

[alacarte]

Found a brand new worst ever candy this afternoon, and one which I was looking forward to all week .. from, who else, Manischewitz, entirely new product: Double Chocolate Dipped Matzos ... $6 a tiny box ..... the matzo inside the coating, which fell off in great chunks, was stale and the coating a true horror ....so much for "New and Improved" ...

what a bummer, G.G. I bought the double-chocolate-dipped macaroons too. I was planning to save them for a few days, until I was good & sick of Passover food & needed a treat.

Right now, I'm staring down a canister of Manischewitz Cappuccino Chip macaroons. Not bad. For macaroons.

ah, Gifted Gourmet, I mis read your earlier post. You had the double-dipped matzah -- I have the double-dipped macaroons, which I opened last night in your honor. They're pretty good, almost like black forest cake, although I checked the ingredients & there are no cherries in there. Kind of tastes like it. Which worries me a bit.

[Gifted Gourmet]

Found a brand new worst ever candy this afternoon, and one which I was looking forward to all week .. from, who else, Manischewitz, entirely new product: Double Chocolate Dipped Matzos ... $6 a tiny box ..... the matzo inside the coating, which fell off in great chunks, was stale and the coating a true horror ....so much for "New and Improved" ...

what a bummer, G.G. I bought the double-chocolate-dipped macaroons too. I was planning to save them for a few days, until I was good & sick of Passover food & needed a treat.

Right now, I'm staring down a canister of Manischewitz Cappuccino Chip macaroons. Not bad. For macaroons.

ah, Gifted Gourmet, I mis read your earlier post. You had the double-dipped matzah -- I have the double-dipped macaroons, which I opened last night in your honor. They're pretty good, almost like black forest cake, although I checked the ingredients & there are no cherries in there. Kind of tastes like it. Which worries me a bit.

which I opened last night in your honor. They're pretty good,

but did you offer a hearty "L'chaim" as you downed the succulent little morsels??

no cherries, huh? why am I not surprised in the least???

thanks for the "update" ... next year I will shop with a printout of this thread .. lest I forget the sting of the Pesach candy in the ensuing months of the year!!

[bushey]

These are the fruit slices my kids love, but I couldn't find the kosher-for-passover ones in the store this year so they had to wait till we got to the 2nd seder.

What about the toasted coconut marshmallows? I used to love them as a kid, and one of our daughters likes them, too. But daughter #2 asked me to hide them because they're so bad they give her the willies..................

I used to look forward to the cone-shaped chocolate lollipops every year, only to wonder "why?" when I bit into their chocolate waxiness. But the Barton's almond kisses were the absolute best, especially when they got a little stale and weren't so soft.

As for macaroons from a can, they smell so artificial when you pop the cover I can't bear to eat them. We stick to homemade almond cookies.

[Gifted Gourmet]

bushey,

Hope you read the scathing attack some of these dreadful candy concoctions (not able to use the word confections here!!)received! They, your comments, reflect pretty much what we have been whining about!!

Edited April 8, 2004 by Gifted Gourmet (log)

[morda]

alacarte, this made me laugh as well:marshmallows made with fish gelatin.

Gefilte Marshmallows!! For this we left slavery in Egypt?? 

GefilteMallows, now in horseradish flavor!

morda

[Gifted Gourmet]

alacarte, this made me laugh as well:marshmallows made with fish gelatin.

Gefilte Marshmallows!! For this we left slavery in Egypt?? 

GefilteMallows, now in horseradish flavor!

morda

Nice work, morda, very nice!! Welcome to my fantasy world where pretty much everything makes sense ....

[bushey]

bushey,

Hope you read the scathing attack some of these dreadful candy concoctions (not able to use the word confections here!!)received! They, your comments, reflect pretty much what we have been whining about!!

Yup, I read it. I just wanted to suggest that perhaps it's only the Manischewitz brand that is so particularly bad......................or, not.

[Gifted Gourmet]

bushey,

Hope you read the scathing attack some of these dreadful candy concoctions (not able to use the word confections here!!)received! They, your comments, reflect pretty much what we have been whining about!!

Yup, I read it. I just wanted to suggest that perhaps it's only the Manischewitz brand that is so particularly bad......................or, not.

Trust me, some of us don't like anything made by Joyva either ...

I have occasionally named it "Joyless" because it is so damned artificial ....

[jhlurie]

Blovie wants to know if that's where all the sugar is concentrated and if that's where the rock band White Stripes got its name.

Actually, I believe that name came from a DIFFERENT kind of candy, although it was also Meg White's last name (Jack took her last name when they got married, just to be contrary).

Getting back to the fruit slice debate... I still think they are not all equally awful. We don't all stand at the altar of Manischewitz--in fact, I'm fairly certain that the fruit slices my grandparents always used to buy weren't Manischewitz (neither was the Matzoh--we were a Streit's family).

[SobaAddict70]

Short of going out and actually buying some fruit slices, can you describe the taste? Is it cloyingly fake sweet with a hint of tang? Or what?

Unlike Jon here, I'm not about to buy a bar of sugarless chocolate.

Soba

[jhlurie]

How many fruit candies actually taste like fruit? Almost none of them. The fruit slices certainly don't. The main difference between the "good" ones and the "bad" ones may as simple as whether or not the mix of artificial flavors is a bad one or not. Then again, I've seen brands which claim to be using fruit-juice derived flavoring too. Those may be the "better" ones too.

They are fairly sugary, but the sugar on the outside of them actually IS sugar, not some syrupy substiture--so it's "real sweet" more than "fake sweet". The inside isn't all that different from what's in gummy bears or Swedish fish, although its a softer consistency.

Wow. No idea of the actual brand... but this may be the biggest assortment of these I've ever seen. Lemon, Cherry, Orange, Lime. That's the traditional mix.

Okay... now this may be going a bit too far with fruit slices--the "gourmet" chocolate-covered approach.

One more bit of Fruit slice oddness -- Maple Flavored!. That ain't a fruit.

[Gifted Gourmet]

How many fruit candies actually taste like fruit?  Almost none of them.  The fruit slices certainly don't.  The main difference between the "good" ones and the "bad" ones may as simple as whether or not the mix of artificial flavors is a bad one or not.  Then again, I've seen brands which claim to be using fruit-juice derived flavoring too.  Those may be the "better" ones too.

They are fairly sugary, but the sugar on the outside of them actually IS sugar, not some syrupy substiture--so it's "real sweet" more than "fake sweet".  The inside isn't all that different from what's in gummy bears or Swedish fish, although its a softer consistency.

Wow.  No idea of the actual brand... but this may be the biggest assortment of these I've ever seen.  Lemon, Cherry, Orange, Lime.  That's the traditional mix.

Okay... now this may be going a bit too far with fruit slices--the "gourmet" chocolate-covered approach.

One more bit of Fruit slice oddness -- Maple Flavored!.  That ain't a fruit.

Your links are mouthwateringly appropriate for the Worst Passover Candy Ever thread!! Thanks for the great laugh!!

The maple flavored fruit slices?? ewwwwwww!

[bloviatrix]

I nominate Jon for donating his taste buds to a fruit slice taste-off.

[jhlurie]

Maybe next year.

[Gifted Gourmet]

Maybe next year.

Funny how things look better from afar ....

[SobaAddict70]

Just bumping this thread up for our newer members.

What are your memories from last year? And anything in store for this year?

Soba

[alacarte]

this is going to be a long one...Passover comes late this year (end of April). It coincides with my birthday, too. Guess who's getting a matzah cake this year.

Every time I pass the stacks of Atkins-fake-no-carb-pancake mixes, I think of Passover, when we get equally appetizing fake-no-leavening-pancake mixes. And both taste like cardboard. But with all the $$$$ devoted to Atkins R&D over the past couple of years, perhaps Passover fake-mixes will be improved this year.

Here's hoping.

Mmmmmm....at least we get to eat taters.

[AlisonA]

this is going to be a long one...Passover comes late this year (end of April). It coincides with my birthday, too. Guess who's getting a matzah cake this year.   

Every time I pass the stacks of Atkins-fake-no-carb-pancake mixes, I think of Passover, when we get equally appetizing fake-no-leavening-pancake mixes. And both taste like cardboard. But with all the $$$$ devoted to Atkins R&D over the past couple of years, perhaps Passover fake-mixes will be improved this year.

Here's hoping.

Mmmmmm....at least we get to eat taters.

←

Not quite on topic but I look forward to a new batch of Passover goodies each year. But then I have a son who is allergic to corn so these are special treats for him . I am particularly excited this year as there seems to be much more diversity in general kosher food here in Jersey which I hope carries over when Passover comes.

But I have to agree about the blue fruit slices. No one, not even my then 7 year old who loves blue foods would touch them. I think they were supposed to be sour raspberry.

AlisonA

[Pam R]

I think I was deprived as a child... we never had bad Passover candy... and for some odd reason, this upsets me!

OCCASIONALY, somehow my sister and I managed to get an Elite Flake bar or the Elite Orange cream filled chocolate bar, which are in fact my favorite chocolate bar of all time.

I may have to make a special effort to try bad candy this year...

(The suppliers lists just arrived this week and I've been scanning through the lists of chocolates.... so many to choose from..)

[Pam R]

Shaloach Manot were just delivered about half an hour ago and guess what was in them! Fruit slices! "Pizazz Juicy Jellies" in fact. I am looking at one that has purple "flesh", white rind and blue "skin". What citrus fruit is that supposed to be? Ok.. I'm tasting it now... I'm assuming it's supposed to be some kind of berry..,. grape maybe? I can't tell...

I CAN say that they are fresh! I'll wait until later to try the green "fleshed" yellow "skinned" one...

Do people actually enjoy these?

Edited March 25, 2005 by Pam R (log)