Tess

This suggests to me that you're judging it more or less as fiction and as something that springs from the imagination. Yeah, there would be no point in disputing something like that. The thing about memoirs is that they involve real people other than the writer. If someone feels that one of those other people has been unfairly slurred in the memoir, then to raise an objection is not the same as being a mean-spirited detractor or knocking a work just for the sake of knocking it. I usually allow for the possibility that a memoir will be about as self-serving as has been suggested here, partly because I know a couple of people who have written memoirs and I know how much they have-- deliberately or subconsciously-- put slants on certain events. If I was going to bother correcting them I probably wouldn't do it by telling stories on them but rather by trying to correct statements they actually made. Because, heh, god knows they could start telling stories about me.

Is Dudley Nieto of Chapultepec-- formerly of Chapulin, both in Chicago-- from Mexico?

My English boyfriend says "gin and vermouth."

That's what "martini" means in some places, although people are more apt to guess that you want the mixed drink these days.

Don't just tell them where to go-- take them. Your treat. I totally revamped my boyfriend's eating habits that way.

My boyfriend won't eat leftovers either. Drives me crazy. I like leftovers and I can't stand throwing food out. I drive him crazy by re-cooking leftover steak. (Oh, he will eat leftover steak.) We get these wonderful prime NY strip steaks and he grills them outdoors, pretty rare. I don't even really like steak but I will eat these because they are so good, even I can recognize the quality. But once they've cooled off it's somehow much more obvious to me how rare they are. If I have to eat them, I slice them and sear them in a pan first. He can't believe I want to eat that steak what amounts to medium well, and cooked twice at that.

Yes, or a spritzer. Twist of lemon if you think it's too sweet. Or, something along the lines of sangria.

We go to a place where one of the servers shakes hands with you after you've been there a few times, and another where the owner/maitre d' does the same or does a little air-kiss thing. That has never bothered me with them-- they're nice guys-- but somehow it does bother me if it's the first time I've seen someone.

Sounds like you grew up in my house! Family dinners were also where my sisters and I got a head start on some nice eating disorders, since we were always being yelled at to eat either more or less or forced to eat something we didn't like. (There wasn't a picky eater among us but some of the food was just gross.) If I had kids now, we'd all sit down to dinner once in a while but I would go out of my way to avoid repeating that rouine.

I can't use Mr. or Mrs. Dash any more because in grad school I went through a period of putting them on everything-- think cottage cheese with Mrs. Dash. However, at any given time I own several things like that from The Spice House, such as Salad Elegant and Sunny Paris.

I've had some good meals at the restaurant at the top of Harvey's. It's got a fabulous view. In the past, they have let us sit in the bar and just have a few appetizers, which is nice if you don't want to have a whole meal.

Apple cider with bourbon on the rocks-- whatever proportions you want. We call that a Stonewall, but Googling for that term I see warm drinks made with rum.

Tess.... if you click on the blog link at the bottom of her message above yours she has been diarizing her situation. ← Thanks! Please, everyone, do click that link. Edited to add: or try this one.

I happened to be reading Liquor when the news came about the hurricane. I'm reading on, heart-wrenching as it is, and I've just ordered Prime . I really hope that Brite will be OK.

Happy Birthday, oneidaone's Dad! My Mom's birthday is coming up on the the 15th; we lost her much too early. *Her* mother was an obsessive cook who could certainly have produced a cookbook or two; my mother rebelled from all that and only started cooking much when we were in high school and college. But she got really good at it. Mom had a very funny way with words and I'm sure some remarks about food will come back to me. The only one I can think of offhand was that she said eating grapefruit was "A lot of darn hard work for nothing." That sounds kind of like W.C. Fields might have said it first-- which would also fit with my Mom and her family.

I hope they didn't expect a price break at this late date; that would be really unfair. It's the same amount of money and work for you. In fact, I think if you package up and give them the extra food you're being very nice.

I kind of wish they would charge for bread, or at least make you ask for it. I hate to see the amount of bread, butter and other food that comes with the table and that's thrown away in some restaurants. Oh yes, there is the approach of someone coming by periodically with a basket of bread offering pieces; I wish more places would do that, and free would be fine.

I think this guy is overly convinced by his own rhetoric, e.g.: That sort of "not... but merely" construction raises a lot of red flags if you every did high school debate. Richman's critique of that paragraph is pretty good. The dating conceit is cute, but after a while it seems like he actually believes it.

I agree that everyone has the right to post remarks. I'm a huge fan of the internet as a consumer resource. That article is kind of odd, though. By talking about chefs "running scared" it does suggest that the point is for customers to take some kind of petty revenge. And in fact there are people who behave that way. I don't think the solution is to stop people from posting comments, but website administrators should make sure they're not encouraging people to use their sites to sabotage anyone. I think posting average customer ratings prominently is probably a mistake for some sites. (It really chaps my hide to notice books with surprisingly low ratings on Amazon and then scroll down and see a bunch of noninformative posts, probably by the same person, with one or zero star ratings-- a transparent effort to put customers off the book, which is especially invidious because people order books right from the site.) People should also check periodically for phony posts, as the article indeed mentions the administrators of the London site doing. Above all, customers should read all reviews-- including professional ones-- with a critical eye.

I feel as if that's true about eGullet. A site like the one referenced in the original post, though-- I can see why restaurateurs get nervous. They assign an average score in several categories based on the reviews. This encourages certain kinds of bad behavior, with people writing reviews largely so they can drive the scores up or down. It happens all the time on Amazon and makes my friends who have books out tear their hair.

Also, hopefully, cues within the text will give you some idea of how valuable a review is-- whether it's by a professional or by Joe Blow on a website. If you can read carefully, you can get an idea of where the reviewer may be betraying him or herself. It often seems pretty obvious when a review has been written to grind a personal axe or just because the person wants to her him/herself speak. Admittedly, not everyone can be bothered to read carefully.

I'm not a professional reviewer, for sure, so I can believe that. What I said was based on my experience as a consumer. It seems to me like-- major ****ups aside-- the caliber of cooking is more readily obvious than whether you are likely to get good or not so good service.

I thought this article in Slate was interesting and somewhat analogous, although it's about book reviewing. I was particularly struck by the point that the review is *for the reader.* A lot of journalistic reviewing seems to be less interested in informing the readers and more in dispensing some kind of justice. As a reader (and potential consumer) I don't care so much about the justice issue. I don't like the idea of reviews being unfair, but I also don't care too much if the reviewer thinks Chef X or Author Y is too big for his britches or something similar. If the reviewer knows the chef or the author, on the other hand, the review can still be quite informative, especially if there is disclosure. Having read (and enjoyed) FG's book now, I'm a little undecided on the issue, mainly on service grounds. When I dine out, it's on a level where service lapses are at least as apt as food ones to compromise the experience. I think that's an area where it is indeed possible for a restaurant to make itself look better than it normally does.

Thanks; that is so cool!

Here's a thread with some suggestions: http://forums.egullet.org/index.php?showto...568&hl=injector