Etiquette For Comps/Freebees

[dahlsk]

Branching off of the Random Acts of Kindness in restaurants thread, what are your opinions on expectations for comps and other freebees in restaurants? Are there times where you can ever expect them? Proper etiquette when offered one? Or is my thinking about them just showing my greediness?

For instance, when calling for reservations at a nice restaurant, the host often asks if you will be celebrating anything that evening. If you are (birthday, anniversary, etc.) and you tell the reservation taker, should you expect any follow up on that at your dinner? I've received a free dessert, drink, greeting card, but also sometimes nothing from the restaurant. If they ask, should they then recognize the celebration in some way? If they don't ask, when should you point it out to them and then what do you expect them to do for you?

Thanks for your thoughts!

dahlsk

[HKDave]

I don't think there's ever a point where you can expect a comp. Comps are up to the house. If the house has a stated policy like a freebie meal on your birthday or something, then that's a promotion, not a comp, and then it's cool to ask (in advance, please, not when the bill is presented!) If the deal's not publicized, however, it's up to the house if you get comped or not, and it's definitely tacky to ask.

But as for proper etiquette when you get comped, that's easy: personally thank the staffer who made it happen, and tip big time. Not just 15 or 20%, but at least 20% on what the meal would have cost if you hadn't got comped, and then round up. And then add some more. Nothing says 'Thank-you' in a restaurant like cash money. If you're a regular, this also lets the staff know that you're the appreciative kind of guy who will share the love if they feel like taking care of you in some way on a future visit.

[Pan]

Branching off of the Random Acts of Kindness in restaurants thread, what are your opinions on expectations for comps and other freebees in restaurants? Are there times where you can ever expect them?

I expect (or at least hope) to be comped only if there's something seriously wrong with a dish in a high-end restaurant, as when my brother's chicken was partially raw at lunch at Bouley and had to be sent back.

Proper etiquette when offered one?

In the instance mentioned above, we tipped as if we were charged for the dish. In circumstances where the comping was totally gratuitous, I've added extra on top of what I would have tipped on the whole bill.

For instance, when calling for reservations at a nice restaurant, the host often asks if you will be celebrating anything that evening. If you are (birthday, anniversary, etc.) and you tell the reservation taker, should you expect any follow up on that at your dinner?

Do I expect a freebie just because it's a birthday or something? No. A candle in my dessert, yes. Considering that there are restaurants that have a high volume of celebrators every day, do you want them to go broke giving everyone freebies? I definitely think it's presumptuous to expect a freebie under such circumstances. My feeling is that if I get one, I'm thankful, but I never expect it or take it for granted, and never try to pressure anyplace for a birthday gift. I think that's gauche. Then again, I also don't let restaurants know what the occasion is; usually, someone else does, though. But all I want is good food and good service. My friends can give gifts if they like, but the restaurant has to make money and deserves full payment for services rendered.

[Pan]

There's one thing I forgot: When I'm not expecting anything on the bill to be comped, I call the waiter over and ask whether they forgot to charge me for something, then if they say it was on the house, I not only thank them but object that it was unnecessary ("There was really no need for you to do that.").

[HKDave]

I expect (or at least hope) to be comped only if there's something seriously wrong with a dish in a high-end restaurant, as when my brother's chicken was partially raw at lunch at Bouley and had to be sent back.

Ah, Pan, that's one situation I hadn't considered. Yes, if there's a major screwup I would expect the house to make it right, and that usually means a comp (at least). But even then, I never ask for a comp - if they make it right, I tip and come back; and if they don't, I don't, although I will usually let the manager know what happened in case they want to improve for their next customer.

As for the rest of what you say, agree agee agee.

[Suzanne F]

Sometimes, the restaurant's response to customers' special occasions is not tangible -- assigning a "better" table than they might otherwise be assigned, or even just accepting the reservation itself when the restaurant might otherwise be fully booked. In those circumstances, the customers might not realize that they are, if fact, receiving something of perceptable value.

[docsconz]

That's right, Suzanne. Last night my favorite local restaurant, Chez Sophie, squeezed my wife and I in and gave us a great table at the last minute when I called a little in advance to make a reservation and let them know it was our anniversary. We didn't expect or get any other comps. The dinner was fantastic. That was enough.

[Milt]

My thoughts on this subject have already been expressed far better than I am capable of doing. Then why am I responding? To agree on a couple of important issues. Comps are the prerogative of the house. It is their call entirely, or it wouldn't be a comp. This is true even when the kitchen, or other staff, has screwed up royally. My tip is always based on the total value of what has been served, including comps, including coupons, or anything else of value. It is my role to evaluate the food quality, service quality, ambiance, etc. relative to the cost of same. Then I decide whether to return and how frequently to do so.

[Pan]

Milt, what does the waiter have to do with food quality? Isn't the tip in payment for the waiter's service?

[Milt]

Milt, what does the waiter have to do with food quality? Isn't the tip in payment for the waiter's service?

On occasion, the waiter does have control of the food quality. The most obvious example is when they don't serve the food promptly enough after the kitchen has prepared it. An otherwise delicious meal can be ruined when it arrived at the table at room temperature.

[Pan]

That's true, but if the food is bad, it's usually the fault of the kitchen, don't you think?

[browniebaker]

Agree with Suzanne, that the special touches a restaurant might add for a celebration of an anniversary or a birthday might not and need not be in tangibles such as food or drinks. I just called and made a reservation for two for the 22nd of June, letting the restaurant know that my husband and I are celebrating our ninth wedding anniversary at the restaurant where we had our first date. The person who took my call obviously took note of that. What do I expect? I expect them to give us a table in a quiet and romantic spot in the restaurant. Anything more would be icing on the cake but not expected.

edit: typo

Edited June 1, 2004 by browniebaker (log)

[saraimay75]

The only time I expect anything is when the resturant has made a mistake with the food. Birthdays wise (if it's mine) coms/feeebees don't really matter to me because I'm not paying .

[KarenS]

Do other businesses give out things everyday? Why should people get free food? Do you give me free clothes or gas or paper or plants etc... Why is it that the restaurant industry is the one expected to give away their money? I sure don't give away desserts. I am a Pastry Chef- that is how we make our money, people go out to eat on special occasions. My doctor has never said to me "it will be free because your birthday is this month". Everyone wants a free dessert. Hmmm, do you pay my salary? my bills? What exactly do you, or your boss give me for "free"? WHY SHOULD I COMP YOU???????

[tomweir]

Why? Well, because it's a relationship. And depending on your setup, with certain customers, you could have different kinds of relationships. Every customer is different. One of my in-laws dads used to work in the Fulton Street fish market and he always said "you size the guy up. Do you want him back? Do you give a shit? What's he good for?"

I have a local restaurant, a small bistro, who I visit regularly, and whose staff I tip well, and who I steer people towards. Sometimes I pay the whole bill, sometimes they comp dessert and coffee. They almost always round the bill down. The owner and I have never met outside his doors but I would call him a friend at this point. He comps because he likes me, he likes my frequent business, he likes me looking after his waiters and he likes the business I point his way.

Do I expect it? No. Absolutely not. Does he feel bound to do it? No. He would feel free to bill me the whole amount, and does regularly. Is it nice that it happens? Yes. Does it keep me coming? Yes.

[rose and antojitos]

Everyone wants a free dessert. Hmmm, do you pay my salary? my bills? What exactly do you, or your boss give me for "free"? WHY SHOULD I COMP YOU???????

Yes, actually. Your customers do pay your salary.

[NulloModo]

WHY SHOULD I COMP YOU???????

Because it is seen as added value for the customer, and gets them to come back so you make more money.

The same way the Vegas or Atlantic Casinos will comp hotel rooms, drinks, dinners, etc, to keep people there and spending money, and to get people to come back again and spend more money.

Desserts in particular are cheap from an ingredients point of view, so you lose what, $1.50 worth of flour, sugar, and chocolate, and in return a party stays and they all order coffee (which is almost pure profit), maybe a couple glasses of wine (again almost pure profit), and want to come back again because of the added value they see. You make a lot more than you lose doing this.

[browniebaker]

Do other businesses give out things everyday? Why should people get free food? Do you give me free clothes or gas or paper or plants etc... Why is it that the restaurant industry is the one expected to give away their money? I sure don't give away desserts. I am a Pastry Chef- that is how we make our money, people go out to eat on special occasions. My doctor has never said to me "it will be free because your birthday is this month". Everyone wants a free dessert. Hmmm, do you pay my salary? my bills? What exactly do you, or your boss give me for "free"? WHY SHOULD I COMP YOU???????

Restaurants are not the one type of business that give out freebies or discounts. Lots and lots of pther kinds of businesses do it to create good will or to do a favor. My father's a surgeon, and he might discount a patient's bill, or make a housecall free of extra charge, or give free samples of a drug for which he has given the patient a prescription. I agree that no one should come to take freebies for granted, but restaurants are not the only buisnesses whose customers or patrons come to expect or even brazenly demand freebies with an arrogant sense of entitlement. Just ask my father, some of whose patients even have the gall to ask him to open the office one hour on a Saturday morning just to see them!

Edited June 1, 2004 by browniebaker (log)

[jschyun]

Recently, I once got comped an appetizer for no other reason than that they felt sorry for me because I was eating alone. (I think they saw that I was originally a 2 person party and took pity on me) It was an excellent dish and I simply tacked the price onto the tip.

--spelling edit

Edited June 2, 2004 by jschyun (log)

[Pan]

Professors are also sometimes known to up the grades of particularly diligent students with good attitudes.

(Could you guess I spent 5 hours finishing grading and paperwork this afternoon/evening?)

[jackal10]

If I, as a food writer, accept a freebie from a restaurant or supplier - an invite to a launch party, for example, or a free meal, am I duty bound to write it up?

Most food journo's I know seem to write up maybe one in ten free meals or even less, which seems to me to have an element of free-loading. I feel that if you accept the invite, you should have the intention of writing it up. If you don't intend to write, then refuse the invite.

Not that foodie journos would ever freeload...

[KarenS]

A non paying customer is not paying my salary. We give away desserts on bithdays. People lie everyday. Our average is 25 for lunch and 20 for dinner. Perhaps we would make more money if people were honest. Businesses do not give me anything; maybe that is because I would never think to ask.

[tomweir]

Wow, that's pretty extraordinary. Do you have a sign up? Or is the place big?

[NeroW]

Everyone wants a free dessert. Hmmm, do you pay my salary? my bills? What exactly do you, or your boss give me for "free"? WHY SHOULD I COMP YOU???????

Yes, actually. Your customers do pay your salary.

What they said.

I get comped quite a bit at some, uh, bars that I frequent here in Chicago. Not a whole tab picked up (although that has happened before), but a round on the house for my friends and I, or a few shots here and there.

I also get comped frequently at restaurants where I know people working in the kitchen, or know the waitstaff.

*I* also comp people whenever my boss says to do so.

I don't expect it, but I like having it done to me, and I also like doing it. It makes everyone feel good.

[KatieLoeb]

Everyone wants a free dessert. Hmmm, do you pay my salary? my bills? What exactly do you, or your boss give me for "free"? WHY SHOULD I COMP YOU???????

Yes, actually. Your customers do pay your salary.

What they said.

I get comped quite a bit at some, uh, bars that I frequent here in Chicago. Not a whole tab picked up (although that has happened before), but a round on the house for my friends and I, or a few shots here and there.

I also get comped frequently at restaurants where I know people working in the kitchen, or know the waitstaff.

*I* also comp people whenever my boss says to do so.

I don't expect it, but I like having it done to me, and I also like doing it. It makes everyone feel good.

I believe the phrase for this is "to show a professional courtesy" to someone. I often send a glass of wine or ask the kitchen to send a little amuse out to a table of other "in-the-biz" folks when I know they are in my restaurant. It's just something to say "nice to have you here in your limited free time". The courtesy is often extended/returned to me when I visit their establishments and they know that I am there. I don't expect it, but it's very nice.

Just last night I went for the first time to a new local bar that is owned by a former co-worker and staffed by many former employees of one of the restaurants for whom I used to purchase beverages. Dining companion and I each ordered two glasses of wine, and he ordered a small appetizer. The staff was kind enough to send us two small plates of different bruscettas that they have on the menu, ostensibly to ask our opinions on them. They were delicious and it was a lovely gesture. A small, "thanks for stopping by" tip of the hat. We left a generous tip after having many great conversations with various staff members.

And speaking as one who is controller of a restaurant and pays all the bills, the taxes, does the payroll. etc., Hell YES the customers pay your salary. If it wasn't for the incoming revenue, where did you think the money was coming from? Some sort of trust fund??? The money bush out behind the restaurant?

I'm guessing from the attitude displayed by that post that it's probably a good thing it came from someone in the back of the house. They wouldn't last long on the floor anywhere I've ever worked.