Customer/bartender tab maintenance

[Nathan]

There's an employee owned (several of the bartenders and managers are partners in it) restaurant cum bar that I've consistently gone to once or twice a week over the past eight months. I've also brought people with me, including groups of up to 12 or so. I've easily spent over a grand there on libations (probably quite a bit more). By any definition, I'm a "regular".

As you would expect they'e comped me on occasion, I've tipped accordingly etc. Normal NY symbiotic customer/bartender relationship.

A couple months ago this changed. Specifically, one night I came in, ordered a drink and the bartender misheard me and thought I ordered two of them (it was busy and loud...it always is there). I corrected him and took the one drink. At the end of the night when I got my tab (from a different bartender)...both drinks were on it (along with whatever I'd ordered since then). The second bartender (there's usually three working at any given time) took the drink off the tab but told me that I was "wrong." (I wasn't.)

Since then I've noticed a couple of the bartenders becoming rather unpleasant (while others have remained friendly). A couple weeks ago when I came in one night with a friend...one bartender immediately motioned over another bartender (who is a partner) and he informed me that I "have to pay for every round on the spot in cash...no keeping a tab" (which is what I'd traditionally done there..being a regular). He went on to say (to the best of my recollection...it was very loud)...that'd they'd been "screwed" by me on drinks that I hadn't paid for when I ordered from one bartender and "got the tab from a different bartender" at the end of the night.

Now, I don't have the foggiest clue whether this is true...it's certainly possible. I haven't kept close tabs on what I was drinking everytime I was there (I'm not always just buying drinks for myself...and it's a short stumbling distance from my apartment). but, I'd never thought of it as my job to keep track of my tab. they all know my name, it's not so hard to keep a centralized tab is it? who's responsibility is it to keep track of a customer's orders? the staff or the establishment? it's not like they haven't made plenty of money off of me.

I'm leaning towards never going back. but I'm curious as to whether people (especially those of you in the industry) think I'm in the wrong here.

[docsconz]

From the story you presented I wouldn't say that you are in the wrong. Personally, I think the greater responsibility belongs to the bar, however, the customer should keep track as well so as to not be taken advantage of as you seemed to have been. For whatever reason, they do not appear to appreciate your business anymore. I would suggest that you move on.

[Busboy]

My immediate thought would be to have a drink or two, get a little attitude about my tab from one of the bartenders and give a whole lot of attitude back in return, beginning with a rant about all the money I'd dropped in the past year and ending by stomping out while loudly vowing never to return.

Sadly, as much fun as this is, experience teaches that it rarely leads to a successful resolution of the problem. And, in addition, I've found that friends, posters on eGullet, bartenders and my own self often get our knickers disproportionately twisted over minor communication lapses or slights that are more perceived than real.

If there's a compelling reason to favor that particular bar with your regular custom, rather than asking strangers to determine who's "right" and who's "wrong", why don't you go in early one night, talk to one of the owner-bartenders before it get loud, explain what you think you know and see what they say?

Good tips for them, a friendly local with the occasional free round -- this could be a win-win.

Of course, they could be thin-skinned dicks, you could be being wrongly blamed for another's sins, or you may have committed real sins yourself that you may not even be aware of, but which have earned you justifiable enmity from the bar's staff.

But you'll never find out by asking here.

[docsconz]

My immediate thought would be to have a drink or two, get a little attitude about my tab from one of the bartenders and give a whole lot of attitude  back in return, beginning with a rant about all the money I'd dropped in the past year and ending by stomping out while loudly vowing never to return.

Sadly, as much fun as this is, experience teaches that it rarely leads to a successful resolution of the problem. And, in addition, I've found that friends, posters on eGullet, bartenders and my own self often get our knickers disproportionately twisted over minor communication lapses or slights that are more perceived than real.

If there's a compelling reason to favor that particular bar with your regular custom, rather than asking strangers to determine who's "right" and who's "wrong", why don't you go in early one night, talk to one of the owner-bartenders before it get loud, explain what you think you know and see what they say? 

Good tips for them, a friendly local with the occasional free round -- this could be a win-win.

Of course, they could be thin-skinned dicks, you could be being wrongly blamed for another's sins, or you may have committed real sins yourself that you may not even be aware of, but which have earned you justifiable enmity from the bar's staff.

But you'll never find out by asking here.

←

Better advice than mine.

[Nathan]

good advice!

unfortunately, my schedule doesn't really permit me to go in there early enough.

it was clear that not all of the bartenders "got the memo"....

I don't think anyone was trying to take advantage of me...I can well believe that a drink or two on occasion never made it from tab to tab (and I either didn't notice or thought I was being comped).

but I've been a pretty regular customer and a good tipper so in my view that's hardly hurting them.

regardless, this place is so incredibly popular that my absence will mean nothing.

now if I had a blog and wanted to name names, I could be like this individual (who wrongfully maligned the Pegu Club): http://majikthise.typepad.com/majikthise_/..._shakedown.html

and get myself linked to all over the internet....but I tend to think that's gauche for what is ultimately a miscommunication. (I'm still wondering, is there some sort of bar etiquette that I'm missing that says that if you have a tab with one bartender that you can't order from a second?)

[docsconz]

It may be an issue with tip distribution. Perhaps the earlier bartender tends to get stiffed? It probably makes sense to settle with each bartender individually, but if one leaves and doesn't come to you to settle, I don't see that as being your fault.

[spaetzle_maker]

This is an interesting dilemma - I relate to it. I like familiarity and so I find places I like and go back often. If something wasn't on my tab, I used to bring it to the attention of the bartender or server, but sometimes strangeness would ensue: It would be explained that I had been comped the drink, and then I'd feel kind of awkward for not recognizing in the first place that I'd been comped. One time, a server actually was offended that I hadn't recognized the comp as a friendly gesture and I felt bad about it. So now, I don't say anything. But even that is a dilemma for me, because I don't feel a sense of entitlement to free stuff and I'd rather not act like an @sshole at a place I'd like to spend more time at. So at those places, I'm just consistently a huge tipper (comp or not) and I hope it evens out in the end and I haven't inadvertantly made a jerk out of myself.

In general, if there are mistakes, they should be handled in good faith. If you feel you've always treated the staff fairly, you can continue going and acting as you normally do - the staff may come around. But otherwise, it doesn't seem very nice that they so readily assumed the worst of you.

Keep us posted - I'd like to hear how this works out...

[Nathan]

It may be an issue with tip distribution. Perhaps the earlier bartender tends to get stiffed? It probably makes sense to settle with each bartender individually, but if one leaves and doesn't come to you to settle, I don't see that as being your fault.

←

hmmm...there's no leaving early at this place...but I don't think they're asking people to pay two or three separate tabs.

I would think that they pool their tips.....

edit: but going to spaetzle_maker's post -- yeah, I have the same quandary sometimes...although usually bartenders tell you when you're being comped...some don't always....leaving you with situations where you don't know if you were comped or if they forgot. I tend to think the onus isn't on the customer in that situation. I always tip as if I've been comped and leave it at that.

Edited May 29, 2007 by Nathan (log)

[cax77uk]

if a bartender is comping or inviting you for a drink they really should be letting you know. The whole point is that it´s a gesture on their part appreciating your loyalty/big spending and if they don´t tell you it kind of defeats the point!

RM

[Simon_S]

Hmmm, I wouldn't be able to let this one go and leave with my tail between my legs, but similarly the "all guns blazing" approach rarely does anyone any good. If you really can't get in and talk at a time when you'll be surrounded by sober people, would it be worth handing the owner-bartender a note. I'd lay it on very thick, saying that you have never knowingly stiffed a bartender, would be mortified if you ever discovered you had *unknowingly* stiffed a bartender, and that you are, in fact, mortified that they have seen fit to remove your tab facilities. Play it nicey nicey, guilt them into thinking they were probably the assholes, that you're cut from the highest moral cloth, not to mention a good drinker, and you should be back on good footing.

To answer your other question, I think if you set up a tab you should be able to order from any bartender once you tell them the tab details. If they screw it up that's their business.

Si

[Luckylies]

Find a way to clear your name. New York is a small town.

Really though, you like this place, you go there a lot- go in and pay cash on the spot, for a night of drinks- then address it next time you're back in.