Stone

The clip art was courtesy of Ivan. I'm sure he could be cajoled into creating something appropriate for you. Would you ever have thunk that your path to glory would lead through eGullet?

Slice the onions thin. Saute over med-low heat in some olive oil for about 15-20 minutes.

I haven't seen my hydrometer since the first time I brewed. How scientific do you get? Do you get to level of alpha acids, bittering units, 2 row, etc? Everyone I know just goes into the store and says, "I want to make a [fill in the type of beer], can you make me a kit?"

I'm just glad that someone took one of my brilliant ideas seriously.

An on-line eGullet cookbook?

So, they're blending great French wine in with o.k. Napa wine?

Can someone explain what in Opus One differs from regular Mondavi? Are they different types of grapes? Grown in different places? Handled differently? Aged differently?

Perhaps I'm misunderstanding stuff, but did you go to cooking school with the expectation of being a food writer and not a chef? How does your cooking school experience influence the way you write about food? Do you think it gives you a point of view missing from other food writers?

I try to avoid Costco unless it's the off-hours. But I haven't figured out what the off-hours are. A trip to Costco reminds me of how much I dislike people. O.k., that's a joke. It reminds me of how much I dislike crowds of people getting in my way and not moving with any apparent purpose or desitination. Although the side of SF's massive Costco have aisles, the center of the store is a hodge-podge of clothing, CDs, books and office furniture that turns into a random bumper-car fight causing grid-lock that backs into the aisle. Free food stations become all-you-can-eat buffets greatly contributing to the crowd and confusion. The worst part is that after manuevering through this mess to find stuff I want, I'm confronted with at least a 30 minute wait to get to a register where, inevitably, the person at the check-out counter screws something up and has to call the supervisor who, of course, must first finish her hot dog. On the other hand: Edamame at Costco is better than Trader Joes or Safeway. Hot dog/hamburger buns and rolls for picnic are amazingly cheap. Often very good deals on other meats.

I don't know what the difference is -- except that they're usually sold shelled and cheaper than classical shrimp (I have trouble finding jazz shrimp or bubble-gum-pop shrimp). They taste pretty good to me.

Overnight cooking? If you were smoking on the roof of your apartment building, would you light the sucker and go to sleep for 9 hours, or is there too great a risk of wind/fallover/fire?

Alton Brown suggests putting 16 oz, half and half sirloin and chuck, into the processor with a dash of salt and pulsing exactly 10 times.

You can find my first experiences with the Weber Bullet here: click. Here's what I found: 1) I had the unit in a nook in the roof, about 3 feet away from the walls. I don't think I had enough airflow through the lower vents to keep the coals glowing. Next time it will sit in the center of the roof. (I put a foil pan of water under the unit to make sure I wasn't melting the roof top. It didn't seem to be an issue.) I thought about getting a thin metal pipe, about two feet long, that could slide into a vent hole for blowing. Hopefully not necessary nor worth the burned lungs I will end up with since I'll certain breath in through the pipe. 2) To add new coal, per Col's instructions, I just lifted off the top two sections (there's a handy lip where the top meets the middle, it's easy), and rested it on an grill grate (so as not to melt into the roof). It's much easier than trying to spoon hot coals into the door. 3) I need an easy way to check the water level in the tray -- or just add water carefully throughout the process. 4) Digital Thermometer is the way to go. A regular meat probe sticking in the meat will be black and unreadable. 5) I picked up wood chips (apple and hickory) at Whole foods. They were chipped quite small (almost but not quite like hamster cage chips). This meant that they burned pretty fast.

My friend Mark does. But you have to drive down to San Jose just to fly up to Napa. Not worth the effort.

There is a small airport in Sonoma, but unless you've got a Cessna, Oakland is probably the closest.

O.k. This isn't really helping me.

The butt -- 4.5 pounds of pork: The Bullet: I hope to get the butt in the bullet by 9 am tomorrow, so's its ready at 2. I'm looking for an internal temp of about 170? I've got a digital thermometer (per Col.'s instructions) and a regular oven thermometer. Would I be best off leaving the digital probe sitting on the rack to tell me the smoker temperature, and sticking it in the meat after about 4 hours? By the way -- I had assumed that I would put the pork on the lower tray in the middle of the smoker. But now I'm thinking that I'll put it on the top tray, with a pyrex pan on the lower tray, perhaps with some chopped carrots and celery, to catch the drippings and make some type of sauce when it's done. Is this a waste of time?

Probably, the ones with the yeast sediment on the bottom. If you're going to pastuerize, you usually filter out the dead yeast.

I have a recollection that making a Dunkin Hines cake in the 70's involved pouring about 1/4 cup of vegetable oil in the mix. Am I nuts?

I feel the same way about San Francisco. Some feel that way about New York.

Hummingbird Cake? Is that made out of Ortolans?

I've noticed that it's become harder and harder to get a good piece of cake. I recall in my youth eating and enjoying moist, light and delicious cakes, with creamy smooth icing. Most of the cake I eat nowadays is heavy and dry, and the icings are often heavier and too damn sweet. I'm talking about decent restaurant cakes, not Safeway/Costco stuff. Am I the only that noticed this? Anyone know the cause? (I'm talking about things like regular chocolate/angel's food/etc. cake -- not the warm, flourless, etc. stuff.)

You might also want to avoid South Asia, Southeast Asia (with the possible exception of Thailand), San Francisco, Denver, Newark and the following so-called air-lines: United, American, Delta, Continental, and US Air (did I forget any?).

Why?

I always thought that "incompetance" was the accepted joke about Italy and Italians. Kind of the flip-side to all French being foul smelling assholes.