Competition: Round Ten

[maggiethecat]

Before I start shamelessly mining the excellent Smackdown Topics you submitted in the "Writer's Block Party" round, I thought this might be an amusing In Crowd assignment. (So did Fat Guy; in fact, he suggested it.)

Write a paragraph or two of a literary conceit of your choice, sprinkling eGullet aliases as cleverly and frequently as possible. It won't be too hard to sprinkle more cleverly and frequently than I have below:

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The col klinked his glass against mine as I sat among his guests at the al fresco fete celebrating the premiere of Godzilla369, his latest sequel to the Japanese horror classic. The stars peeked out over the Hollywood Hills. "Quella stella bella! " I mused, slipping into freshman Italian, as is my wont after three martinis. (I never want oliver twist—a simple skewer of garlic, per favore.)

We drank under the stars as the great Director complained about his servant problems. He collared the screenwriter and sobbed on his shoulder. "Dave, the Cook quit yesterday! And remember the butler from Wyoming? He quit. The Montana butler quit too!"

He patted my knee, skirting the hem of my Versace frock. "Be a lamb," he whispered in my ear. "Go whip up some of your famous apple pandowdy."

I adjusted my Harry Winston tiara, and fixed him with my basilisk gaze. "That story in The Inquirer was a tissue of lies. This Leading Lady can't cook!" I pointed to the George Clooney lookalike lounging against the bar. "Go ask your Leading Man. Gordon Cooks!."

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My apologies to all whose names I've taken in vain. Deadline? Midnight, Saturday September 13th, in a time zone of your choice.

And yes, I finally straightened out the numbering.

Please don't post your entries on this thread. Post them here!

Edited September 4, 2003 by maggiethecat (log)

[lamb]

Is it too late to Trademark my screen name?

[maggiethecat]

Hey, give it a try! (I think Lambchop's taken.)

[jhlurie]

Ha. I can never be infamous now. I used a concoction based on my own real name instead of some clever alias like "tommy"! And my name doesn't sound like anything else. Oh the pain!

Nevertheless I will have fun with this one.

[maggiethecat]

Nevertheless I will have fun with this one. 

That was my intention, Jon. Go for it.