Tess

I'm surprised at the name-calling by Trotter. Not exactly taking the high road, is he? In my opinion, calling your opponent names like that never strengthens your case.

At the kitchen table, especially since I'm usually the cook and server. On the sofa with small dishes on the coffee table. At a restaurant bar overlooking the kitchen-- great fun. A nice table at a restaurant is always good too. A table under the stars in a Greek or Italian restaurant in the summer: perfect.

My boyfriend and I have worn out one copy of Silver Palate New Basics and are working on a second, so I'd have to say that. It's not even that we use so many of the recipes; it's just a handy reference for looking up an ingredient and getting some ideas. Actual recipes, I use more by Julia and Marcella but the New Basics is a good book to keep out on the counter. (I might have said Joy of Cooking too and maybe I just don't consult it much any more because I have so much of it memorized.)

Ah, burning stuff. Last Halloween I had a lot more trick-or-treaters than expected. At the end of one long rush, one of the kids commented, "Your house smells nice." It did-- although I have no idea why burning turnips (put in the oven to roast) and a saucepan with an inch of burned red wine (set on the stove to reduce for my beef stew) should make such a very delightful smell. Luckily I had more wine, but the turnips were useless and I almost had to throw the saucepan out.

If-- reading your previous post-- your base is 20%, how does it work out if you tip 15% on a meal where alcohol is a large percentage of the tab? That's what I do sometimes, as long as I don't think we were too labor-intensive a table to wait on, say we had an expensive bottle of wine and two plates of spaghetti. Unfortunately if you get a very fancy bottle of wine you often get a lot of attention as a result, and then I feel crappy for giving what might even be construed as a not good tip. On the other hand, we once got a fancy bottle of wine, left a 20% tip-- and had the waiter come over and say hi, and send us a dessert, next time we came in. So, assuming that was because of the previous visit's tip, in some circles 20% on a large wine tab is considered generous. (I admit that $100 is normally my limit for a bottle of wine in a restaurant, and we usually go to places where we can spend a lot less or just get one glass. Wine prices are probably *the* reason we don't do much high-end dining out.)

I'm starting to agree with whoever said just to have them to dinner at your house or go to their house. Cook or get takeout. If they start insisting on going to a restaurant, just be frank. "You guys have been late one time too many and I don't like getting stuck somewhere waiting for you and/or missing a reservation. But I like spending time with you, so just come over here."

Another vote for eGullet, epecially people's foodblogs. Getting a new cookbook. A trip to Mitsuwa for something new that's Asian. A vaction to a place with different food and/or where I try new restaurants. New restaurants in general.

I like the idea of meeting at one's home. If they don't get there in enough time, cancel the reservation. Or go to a place where you don't call ahead, meet them in the bar and put in for a table only when they show. I'm with those who think it's intolerably inconsiderate to the staff and other diners to hold a table while you wait for the rest of your party. Eventually, you'll probably have to tell them upfront why you are doing these things but I wouldn't give them a lecture, but just say, "I'm not comfortable inconveniencing the staff" or "The restaurant doesn't want to seat people before everyone has arrived." People who do this kind of thing won't ever perceive that as an issue (after all they are never around to see what it's like holding a table for latecomers), but at least you won't be in that position any more. If you meet them in the bar and they have to sit waiting for an hour because they lost you the reservation, they may even get the point after a while.

Put that way, I would agree. Partly it also depends on what a "modest" substitution is. But I think there is, at least theoretically a place in this world for restaurants (high and low end) that serve what they serve, and that's it. It doesn't have to be about ego or artistic vision either; it can be about knowing what you do well and what you don't, and how many hands (and materials) you have in the kitchen.

When I saw a similar article around the same time, I said, "Yay!" I really have a lot of respect for a chef who will only prepare menu items a certain way, will not allow substitutions, etc. I don't know if that's good for their bottom line or not, but I can see really good culinary reasons for it.

I don't agree that that's common sense. I never assume an eyewitness account is all that reliable in the first place. I am certainly assuming in this case that the story was not fabricated, but it could be inaccurate in some ways. (No personal comment on you, Randi; this is just about the nature of the argument.) But my take on it is that we're arguing about the story *as told,*more or less. Then it becomes about interpretation. I agree that there should be a middle ground and there should be some level of mutual respect in these situations. I think people on both sides should not assume that people are out to get you, but that's easier said than done.

I just bought some for $6.99 in the Chicago area! Whenever it goes down that low I pick up a few bottles to use in cocktails and stuff. Really very good for under $10 although I don't care for it enough to drink a glass straight.

With respect, I think there might be a reason for that. ← Yes? ← Seriously? I think the reason no one agrees with you is that your judgment of this situation is off, for a whole lot of reasons that people have already explained.

With respect, I think there might be a reason for that.

Ditto on the parmesan. Also, sprinkle on cut fresh strawberries and let sit for a while. You may add ground black pepper. Works well on a plate with a piece of parmesan. I've also been drizzling the good stuff on thick Greek yogurt the way you would do with honey, but people probably think I'm weird for that. In the NYTimes today, Nigella Lawson suggests yogurt, honey and toasted almond "sundaes" and I may try that with balsamic. I also put a little balsmaic in soup or anything where you might use a splash of wine or sherry, but I don't feel I need the very expensive stuff for that.

Me too. Why do they do that? And in this case, why were they giving the party dirty looks. That's just weird. Did they think they were camping out there because they hadn't finished their wine? This abandoning of tables at the end is very strange to me. A lot of times, I would like to have an after-dinner drink or a dessert, but the waiter has disappeared and by the time s/he comes back I've wasted enough time that I don't want to order anything else. I could spend the same amount of time and buy more stuff; surely that would be better?

Nope. Only thing I'll say is that both restaurants are in Waikiki. ← Fair enough!

Lemongrass is a wonderful flavor for drinks. We made some great lemongrass-infused vodka last summer; I must do that again. I've been drinking sake on the rocks as a cocktail and (thanks to a suggestion from someone here) I've also started using it where you might use vermouth. I had a vodka-blood orange concoction and I was topping it up with sake.

SuzySushi, was that place next door to Duke's by any chance? I had a similar experience at an expensive chain. A manager came by and asked how things were. I said that my dish hadn't come out looking like it sounded on the menu. She went back and got a menu, and came out going through it word by word, trying to convince me my interpretation was wrong. I think she tried to tell me "shoyu salmon" was a type of salmon and that I was wrong to expect the dish to have shoyu in it, but anyway it went on and on. Clearly several ingredients had been left off but she tried to convince me I was wrong, finally saying that "corporate" strictly specified how each dish was made and that there couldn't possibly have been any deviation. The damn thing was sitting there half-eaten but she wouldn't really look at it. I sent an email to headquarters later and got a certificate for a free dessert or some BS like that.

Hansen's diet soda is made with Splenda. I like the ginger ale very much. That's another one that's good with a little bit of cranberry (or pomegranate) juice.

I can go you one better. I had dinner with a group of six, and one member of the party pocketed the cash that had been left on the table as a tip. The server came out and asked why there was no tip and this woman owned up that she'd taken it, feigning confusion in a way that seemed a little too practiced. I also got the feeling that she only confessed because other members in the group knew her well enough to suspect already. Why they ate with that person more than once is a question I can't begin to answer.

We get takeout from the Mt. Prospect location of Lou's and it's always good. I don't care for deep dish so we get one deep dish and one thin crust. For the thin crust I get garlic, mushrooms, double tomato sauce and while Weight Watchers is in effect I ask for the lower-fat mozzarella. It's very good.

When we dine with my father, we always leave some extra cash in the table. If it were convenient, I would go around to the restaurant, explain to the hostess or somebody what happened and leave some money for the waiter to make it up to a 20% tip. I always think that if you get any free stuff, you should make sure the tip is 20%, and on the total, especially if they made extra trips to bring it out.

Now I'm curious about what the history of the seared tuna thing is in the US. My first experience with it was as bar food in Hawaii, not something chi-chi. It was served pretty much like sashimi and I thought it was delicious; it just had this edge that was a little crispy. It was not cold to be sure, but I often let my sashimi come closer to room temperature anyway. I wonder if part of the popularity of seared tuna is how much is looks like rare steak with a sear on it. My boyfriend wants nothing to do with sushi or sashimi, but he's a steak eater and seared tuna looks normal to him if it's red enough. He won't go out of his way to order it but he will eat a few pieces.

OK! I was sitting in a bar with some friends and ordered a Diet Coke. It came with a straw in it. I took a sip and noticed that it wasn't diet, or it was flat, or some combination-- I don't remember the exact problem. I asked the bartender for a replacement. He took the glass, drank some out of the straw, pronounced it fine and handed it back. He may have been pissed off at me for drinking Diet Coke, but the people I was with were boozing it up and I sort of doubt it was that. Not the same as a chef coming out of the kitchen, but another example of being told you're just dead wrong. (Plus, very unhygenic.)