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RESTAURANT REPORT Laurentino's Ratings: 82, 2$ Metairie: 4410 Transcontinental 779-9393 Lunch Mon.-Fri. Dinner Mon.-Sat. No credit cards. Checks accepted. Last year, New Orleans diners had an attack of hunger for Thai food. This year, our efflorescing taste seems to be for the food of Spain. We've almost always had a Spanish restaurant or two around town. Back in the 1960s and 1970s, a place called Espana managed to hang on for a long time by serving terrific Spanish cooking (as well as enough Italian food to keep the room full). A few Mexican and Cuban restaurants featured paella or arroz con calamares, thereby suggesting that Mexican and Spanish cooking are similar. Which they really aren't very. Almost as soon as Laurentino's opened last year, I started hearing enthusiastic reports about it, and they've increased in number. Now that I've been there a few times, it's clear that a lot of this can be credited as much to a new interest in the cuisine among diners as to the goodness of chef-owner Xavier Laurentino's cooking. The menu goes on for pages, but it's actually rather limited. As it should be: this is a small restaurant, and one that's not usually full. The chef says, however, that he has many more arrows in his quiver, and these will come out as time goes on. The most interesting part of dining here is the menu of tapas-style appetizers. They're much larger than the word "tapas" suggests. Although they run in price between $4 and $7, almost all are big enough to split. Absolutely the best is the Serrano ham, served on round croutons spread with a light aioli. Ham is probably the most commonly-eaten food in Spain, appearing on almost every table at almost every meal. Serrano ham is dry-cured in a way similar to that used to make Italian prosciutto. It's firm, intensely flavorful, and irresistible, even though it just looks like a slice of ham on a piece of bread. Similar canapes are made with tuna, Manchego cheese (the Parmigiana-like cheese from La Mancha), roasted red peppers, and thinly-sliced pork loin. An assortment of these, all passed around the table, is a delicious and distinctively Spanish beginning to the meal. More tapas: shrimp or chicken, served in an orange sauce jammed with garlic, are tasty but don't wear well. (Just get one or the other.) The mussels vinaigrette sound much better than they are; for some reason, for this dish they use the large, tasteless green-lipped mussels, and that makes the whole dish fall flat. They make a few homemade soups. Gazpacho, of course, is on the menu--but they don't plan to serve it till the weather warms up a bit more. Right now, the lentil soup will have to do, and it does well. The large paella pans hanging on the wall should tell you, if you didn't already know, that paella is the entree to get here. Paella is often compared with jambalaya, but that's misleading. The pan is indeed dominated by rice and studded with chicken, seafood, and vegetables--but the flavor is totally different. Much milder, and without the smoky flavors or tomato one finds in jambalaya. Laurentino's paella is served for any number of people.They just use a bigger pan the more eaters at the table. There's always be too much to finish. The full combo (you can also order just chicken, just seafood, or even vegetarian) comes out hot and aromatic, all the different elements lending a different taste in each forkful. It's delicious and fun. There's a puzzling aspect of the paella, though. While most of the ingredients are quite good--even the mussels are the good black kind--some of them are inexplicable. If those aren't canned peas and canned green beans in there, then they have figured out a way to make fresh taste like canned. And I can't detect the slightest hint of saffron--not even annato, the widely-used fake saffron coloring. The price is so low ($15 per person) that I can understand the ingredient deficiencies. But I keep wondering how good a premium paella would be here. Laurentino's makes a pasta variation on paella called "fideua." It sounds good, but it's not as good as the rice version, mainly because the pasta gets overcooked. If you're not going to eat paella, the options are few. There's an interesting lamb stew served over potatoes with peppers and onions, a few pasta dishes (the best is a layered eggplant lasagna with a standard Italian red sauce). The rest of the entrees are larger versions of some of the appetizers. Desserts are all homemade. They make two kinds of flan, one slightly richer than the other, and an almond ice cream, served beribboned with chocolate sauce and whipped cream underneath the ice cream (?). The staff is friendly and pleased that you're trying these unaccustomed (to most people) specialties. Chef Xavier himself is almost always on hand, very willing to tell you all you want to know about his interpretation of Spanish cuisine. Which, if you don't have time to talk, is essayed thoroughly on the menu itself. As you might imagine, the wine list is dominated by Spanish wines, which are vastly better than they were a generation ago. They also have a few good Chilean wines. All these go very well with the food. Most of my quibbles about Laurentino's are minor. But here's a big issue: the no-credit-card policy is ridiculous. It keeps would-be customers away, and limits the ordering of those who do show up. I'd love to see this restaurant thrive, but to do so they need to address the card issue urgently. TEN BEST DISHES AT LAURENTINO'S 1. Paella Valenciana (combination) 2. Serrano ham tapas. 3. Tuna and olive tapas. 4. Garlic chicken. 5. Lentil soup. 6. Manchego cheese tapas. 7. Chorizo poor boy (lunch). 8. Almond nougat ice cream. 9. Flan. 10. Eggplant and meat lasagna.

from Tom Fitzmorris PASSOVER I'm not Jewish, but last night was the first beginning of Passover in about ten years during which I wasn't present at a Seder. (I forgot to put feelers out for an invitation.) Nevertheless, I thought about it even while we had our Eat Club dinenr last night. That Jews all over the world are all eating essentially the same meal that evening is, on even a moment's reflection, amazing and beautiful. That's why I'm always happy to be a part of it. * * * GOOD FRIDAY The first Passover Seder I ever attended was, coincidentally, on Good Friday. It rained like hell and flooded large sections of Uptown. I thought that was pretty heavy, too. There is an ancient and nearly-dead tradition in some of the oldest New Orleans restaurants to serve bacalao on Good Friday. I understand this fully, if the idea is to do penance. There are few foods less rewarding to eat than dried, salted cod. What I've never understood is the way chefs (most of them European chefs) who would not consider serving anything other than fresh fish will make an exception for this most aggressively non-fresh item. It has no taste. Its texture is horrible. It's. . . penance. You can eat all of mine.

For dinner tonite for the people I work for, Moroccan Tabbouleh with toasted goat cheese Rainbow Trout Almondine with dungeness crab and buerre noisette Penne with Roasted garlic pesto fresh steamed big asparagus, dusted with lemon zest Individual sharfenberger chocolate cakes injected with framboise, fresh raspberry sorbet, raspberry popper meringes The hor's douvers were variations on serving Kelley's Katch Caviar The wines were with cocktails - Guenoc syrah and Mason Sauvignon Blanc with dinner - Chateau la Rogue Cuvee Clos des benedictins 2000, Rosemont estate show reserve coonawarra cabernet 1999 and Veuve Cliquot NV brut

Oh man, the coney dogs. I forgot about them. They are the weirdest little hot dogs. Kind of like a Royal Castle hot dog. Or Krystals maybe.

Chicken fried steak, biscuits and gravy, fried catfish and BBQ seem to be the national dishes of Oklahoma. Good BBQ is the easiest to find. So far the best Chicken fried steak is at Nelson's Buffeteria in downtown Tulsa. The other two, forget it. And you wash it down with iced tea, unsweetened. For the best sweet iced tea you have to go to Mobile, Alabama.

from Tom Fitzmorris' daily newsletter. http://www/foodfest.neworleans.com BEST LINE AT THE FRENCH QUARTER FESTIVAL Overheard at the drink booth, something I hope I never hear again, especially not seriously: Customer: "I'd like a bottled water, please." Vendor: "You want regular water or diet water?" * * * GOOD FOOD IS WHERE YOU FIND IT The best dish I ate yesterday came from a restaurant that could only be called touristy: Lemoyne's Landing, located at Spanish Plaza, near the casino and the ferry landing. It was a very thick stew of chicken, tasso, Creole seasonings, rice, and what tasted like cheese but wasn't. It looked terrible, but tasted great. I've never had anything like it, but I will again, I hope.

from Tom Fitzmorris on Friday. The West Bank is a definite place to look for non tourist places. Some of the best Vietnamese is there along with Pupuseria de la Corozon. And now this place. RESTAURANT REPORT Clementine's Belgian Bistrot Ratings: 82, 2$ Gretna: 2505 Whitney Ave. 366-3995 Lunch and dinner continuously Tues.-Sat. DC, MC, V (No American Express) What's Belgian food like? New Orleans diners are getting our first chance to sample it these days. It's the theme of a pleasant restaurant that's worth looking for in Gretna. And you will have to look for it. Unless you remember Willy Coln's Chalet of the 1980s. Clementine's is where that was, near Oakwood Mall a few blocks south of West Bank Expressway. The location is not very visible, but the owners thought the building was perfect for the kind of restaurant they had in mind. It is--except for the lack of a billboard or something to allow more people to discover the place. I spent some time in Belgium a few years ago. The food I found there was the most pleasant culinary surprise in all my European travels. Belgian restaurants are spectacular, with polished, unforgettably delicious food served in a French style but with much less pretension than in France. A handful of specialties come from the Flemish (read Dutch) half of the country, but the flavors are overwhelmingly influenced by the French side. The most distinctive items on Belgian menus are mussels, pommes frites (French fries, if I may be permitted to call them that), and stews made with almost every form of protein. Brussels sprouts and Belgian endives, true to their names, are constantly on the table, as well. Sometimes familiarity with a cuisine is a disadvantage. I had high expectations of Clementine's because of my Belgian experiences. Like most ethnic cuisines removed from their homes, unfortunately, it didn't quite hit the mark. On the other hand, the prices are so low (too low, I'd say) that much can be forgiven in the details, and I've gotten over my initial disappointment enough to be called a semi-regular there now. Start with the soup of the day. Every one I've had showed a homely, rustic quality that we don't see much in soups. For example, my most recent one was a cabbage soup with a few thin slices of sausage floating around in an orange broth--very tasty. They also make a nice onion soup every day. If you will not be having mussels for an entree, get the offbeat garlic mussels. It's the standard preparation for snails, but applied to about a dozen mussels. The flavor of the mussels gets subsumed, but scooping up the garlic-and-herb butter with bread is as good as ever. They do shrimp in a somewhat similar but less buttery way, and that's nice too. The distinctive salad is named for the town of Liege, and is reminiscent of a Nicoise salad without the tuna: bacon, onions, potatoes and green beans. At lunch, they send you a simple salad with nice spring greens on top and shredded iceberg on the bottom, all dressed with a straightforward vinaigrette. Okay. You want to eat like they do in Belgium, you eat mussels. The standard serving of mussels over there is by the bucket--five or six dozen per person. Clementine's has black mussels from the northeast Atlantic, fresh and vivid, served three different ways. My favorite is the vin blanc style, which includes not only the white wine of the name but also enough cream to make it pretty rich. Onions, herbs, and the mussel juices contribute to the sloshy sauce at the bottom of the big bowl, which is just great eaten with a spoon, dipped with bread, or even slurped out of a mussel shell. They also make the commonly-seen mussels mariniere without the cream, and a Provencale version with tomatoes. Each is good, involve the proper surfeit of mussels (mussels, the restaurants don't want you to know, are very cheap), and come with a side order of fries. The passion Belgians have for fried potatoes is so intense that the French make ethnic jokes on the subject. Let them laugh: Belgian fries are the world's best, and even though they serve them everywhere (even in a Chinese restaurant I saw in Brussels), you never get enough of them. I wish I could say that the ones at Clementine's were models of the style, but they're not. They are fresh-cut fries--which right there places them far above the local average --but the ones at Chateaubriand Steakhouse and Rene Bistrot actually come closer to what I remember. Anyway, ask for some mayonnaise, the classic dip for Belgian fries. If you're not ordering mussels, take a look at the entree specials of the day. These have been uniformly good, even the ones that were very unusual (such as a cheesy puff pastry they did one day). Or get the fondue. Fondue? That's something else we see very little of around New Orleans. They make the three classic kinds: cheese (you dip bread into the molten cheese), steak (you fry it at the table), and chocolate (pound cake and fruit). You need at least two people to order any of that. On the regular menu, the best items are the poulet estragon (chicken with a tarragon cream sauce), carbonnades Flamandes (an herbal Flemish-style beef stew), the almond catfish (which would be better with flounder or trout), and the basic sirloin steak with fries. They also make crepes stuffed with many different fillings, but these are very light. Crepes, speaking of that, make the best desserts here, and the best of those is the crepe Clementine. They bakes some apples into a thicker pancake than the word "crepe" suggests, top it with ice cream, and flame it at the table (if they can get the damn lighter to fire up) with Grand Marnier. The service staff is almost too nice, particularly one older waitress who came straight over from the old country and treats you like her family. If she serves your table, there's almost no way you can leave Clementine's without a smile on your face. TEN BEST DISHES AT CLEMENTINE'S BELGIAN BISTROT 1. Moules (mussels) vin blanc. 2. Steak fondue. 3. Crepe Clementine. 4. Garlic mussels. 5. Garlic shrimp. 6. Belgian fries. 7. Crepe Campagnarde (mushrooms, ham, bacon, and cheese) 8. Steak frites. 9. Poulet estragon. 10. Salade Liegoise.

I will add the Cafe B to my list of places for my next trip to the south of Florida. Some of us grew up in Florida and love the eccentricities of the place. My mom's family lived there prior to statehood, the first time. All those northerners can keep on going down to the lower regions. The northwestern panhandle is the best part. Next time your in Pensacola, eat at Jackson's. It is located on the plaza where Andrew Jackson accepted the surrender of Spanish Florida to the United States as a territory.

This is a blurb about Eugene Walter of Mobile, Alabama. I had the pleasure of meeting him in Seaside, Florida. The name of the book is "Moments with Eugene...a collection of memories" by editors Rebecca Barrett and Carolyn Haines. He was quite the storyteller. For those of you who did not have the pleasure of knowing Eugene Walter, a brief synopsis of Eugene's résumé is in order. Eugene Walter was a novelist, poet, essayist, humorist, artist, stage designer, lyricist, actor, master of the culinary arts, botanist, philosopher, sociologist, radio personality, Mobile, Alabama native, resident of Rome and Paris, and most importantly a friend and inspiration to fellow artists and writers. Inspiration, imagination, and encouragement were Eugene's greatest gifts. Admiration was his greatest reward. Sadly, Eugene left us in March, 1998 at the age of seventy-six. But Eugene Walter will never be forgotten. Editors Rebecca Barrett and Carolyn Haines have seen to that. For two years, Rebecca and Carolyn painstakingly solicited, collected, and massaged an unusual menagerie of stories written by Eugene's friends, acquaintances, and colleagues. The result is a 310-page hardcover volume of photographs, squiggles, and mostly humorous, mostly true tales about Mobile, Alabama's anointed renaissance man. A colorful character Mr. Walter was, that's for sure. The extent of that color has now been brought out in Rebecca and Carolyn's delightful book.

The bit of folklore that I was told about the tomato shark is that it was invented for McDonalds. I do not know if this story is true or not, but it sounds good. I have 4 different microplanes and use them all. My little butane torch is a lot easier to store and use than the big one I used for service at Criolla's. In fact, I used it Thursday nite when I served Ricotta Brule's with Fresh Raspberries. Something that I find useless are the shaker tops on spices. I get rid of them and use my measures. Accuracy counts. I love my Benriner curling mandoline. Going into shops like Kitchenique is dangerous for me. What do they have that I might need. Kind of like going into a good bookstore with an excellent cookbook selection.

I have been trying to put my employers cellar on the computer using Robert Parker's Wine Advisor Program. And almost tearing my hair out as I went. The instructions book is about useless. Has anyone else used this program, if so, what shortcuts were you able to figure out when inputing data into the program? What software have others used? Have you found the software to be user friendly or a pain?

Here in Tulsa, I depend on either Parkhill where Milton and Kevin help me or Ranch Acres and Mary is my guiding light. It is illegal to ship wines into Oklahoma, these guys are the best.

My preference, when dining Emeril in New Orleans, is Delmonico's on St Charles. Neil has always done exceptional food.

Actually, it is the people with mullets who toss the other species of mullets. What is the plural for mullet? Mulleti? The Flora Bama is a pretty skanky bar. Been there, done that, don't have to go back. Not even when I go home to visit family.

I second that encouragement. Life is a learning experience. I did not find culinary until I was through the 4 years. But I do not regret the years either. Even though I am not a celebrity chef, I enjoy what I do. Life is good. So what ever you end up doing, Go for it with all the gusto you can. And have fun while your doing it. Even the mundane can be fun if you let it be.

My hesitancy on this product is the glass lid. I really dislike cooking with Chantal cookware because of the lids. They create a huge mess, with all the bubbling and spitting they do. Metal lids with a drip ring are far superior.

The best Cajun restaurants are to be found around Lafayette and New Iberia, Louisiana. That is the home to that particular cuisine. Probably the best chain that is cajun inspired is Copelands. Have fun with your project.

I was at the Red Apple Inn in Heber Springs, Arkansas for breakfast this morning and had blueberry waffles, Ozark bacon slightly crispy, and grits cooked with chicken stock. It was pretty good considering this part of the world is really food challenged.

As long as your going to make a run to Sandor's ( an incredibly nice guy, i first met him when he had his restaurant over in Pensacola on 9th Ave), why not stop off at Destin Seafood Market to check on those scallops. As for the wines, Call Martin's in New Orleans and see what they can come up with, otherwise, head down to Bern's in Tampa, they might have a bottle in their cellar.

I used to read LaBans columns when he dispensed beans writing for the New Orleans Times-Picayune. Rumor has it he was railroaded out of town by Ella Brennan when he gave one of her restaurants a bum review. I kind of liked his writing. What a nightmare of a job, food critic.

Lyle, thanks for the input. Do you know anything about Hattie's. It was recommended to my companion who lives in Ft Worth as a possibility. Although structuring a dinner based on small plates at Abacus sounds like fun. Maybe start with the Lobster shooter.

More than one person has commented on the fact that Starbucks bans smoking. The line is still out the door. The owners made a policy decision, it is still your choice whether to go or not to go.

Have you ever been to Abacus? I had a very nice dinner there during "Restaurant Week". A must try is the lobster shooters. I will be back down Valentine's weekend for Cirque de Soleil and am looking for a place to eat and someplace to go for dessert for after the show. Trendy, cutting edge, maybe south american like brazilian. Have you ever eaten at Sapristi in Ft Worth?

The dessert trolley was the highlight of my one luncheon at LBF. Plus, I had the chance to meet Bob Bennet, what a nice guy.

Gourmet, Food and Wine, and the rest, I pick up at the local B&N on occasion if it has anything interesting inside. I do subscribe to Art Culinaire, Food Arts, and Sante. I find magazines directed to the industry a little more challenging. And the recipes in AC that I have done were worth the effort. Especially the desserts. By the time I finished, there would be several new ideas running through my head. Mostly changes to the dish I was making. I do not think there is a best, basically it is what is appealing to you at that moment. Right now, I am liking Eating Well a lot and also, The Art of Eating, which does not involve recipes in the first place. Good Food, Good friends, Good Health. That is living.