Tuman's Alcohol Abuse Center in Chicago, Illinois. Total dive, but my favorite bar in the city. You can get tanked on a $20 bill there (think $2.50 pints of Guinness). It's tucked away in the Ukranian Village - one time I tried to take a cab there, and the cabbie insisted several times that "there's nothing out there, miss!" The place always smells like a dirty ashtray, but after a few minutes, you get used to it. It has a jukebox that plays only old jazz or thrash metal. There's an Old Style neon sign in the window, and another neon sign hanging on an inside wall with a note attached to the pullcord that says "Do not Touch!" There's a beat-up pool table near the back of the bar. More graffitti than I've ever seen in my life on the walls of the women's bathroom. An enormous painting of a naked, reclining woman centered over the bar. There are a few mismatched tables, with a few broken cafeteria type chairs, and a few empty kegs to sit on as well. I think I'll head over there tomorrow night!