fisherman

We want cunts sucking up to Egullet mods of course, why else do we all read this shite?

One guy has already been told, on camera that there's a job there if he wants it.

That firghtening thought never occurred to me!

Mr Marshall has summed it up perfectly, the current seasons Michelin obsession is no doubt based on someone in productions idea that Michelin is a peg on which to hang culinary aspirations, Michelin and 'The Critics' seem to be what every cookery based show revolves around recently. Don't forget, the little gimps in the Masterchef kitchen are responding to to all manner of prompts, questions and direct feeds when they come out with the 4 second sound bites we hear. I've given up even noticing the amount of times I hear a producer at work, say to a contributor in response to a reply that doesn't quite encapsulate the script line they've got in their head 'That's great, could we do it again though, maybe you could say something like this' Hence a show full of Michelin aspirations that the contestants didn't even know they had until they arrived at the studio.

If you can wait till Mallaig, there's a fantastic little shed on the dock selling pretty good shellfish etc, pack yourself a couple of Ginsters and get your foot down is probably the best bet.

It seems they didn't get many applicants for the show this time round, not that surprising given the time demands.

I can't put it off any longer, and as the only alternative this after noon is the washing up, I'll make a start with the write ups now. I'll do this chronologically, and start with Northcote first, though I'm well aware, as some pedant will no doubt point out, it isn't in the Lake District! We had booked a 'Gourmet Break' basically a decent room (got a free upgrade to a superior as the deluxe rooms were being refurbed) and five course dinner for two for £250. The room was pretty good, and the food was a real surprise, much much better than we were anticipating both from Nigels reputation (though being a Monday night he may not have been in the kitchen) and previous reviews on here. The menu was as follows: Carpaccio of wood pigeon, shavings of smoked foie gras, apricot, organic garden leaves Seared wild seabass, lobster parcel, coriander, chargrilled Tarleton baby gem lettuce, ginger Ascrofts cauliflower soup, summer truffle Dunsop Bridge lonk lamb, girolles, potato souffle A selection of Britsh and Irish cheeses. The pigeon was good, thinly sliced as carpaccio should be, the smoked foie, added another note, the smoked flavour wasn't too apparent, it could have passed for regular foie but that's a minor quibble, whatever flavour was there was perfectly suited to the dish. The apricots adding a sweetness which would otherwise have been missing, all in all a pretty good starter, showing a skilled hand in the kitchen and a real understanding of flavours. Though this was a set menu, this was a dish I would have ordered anyway. The wild sea bass dish on the other hand is something I would never have considered ordering, but it was a real gem, the fish perfectly cooked, the lobster was as good as lobster ever is, though I have to say I'm no fine of lobster, give me a decent crab any day. The lettuce was the real star though, the chargrilled edges adding a perfect smokey flavour, and nestled within was an unannounced piece of dry cured bacon, possibly my favourite part of the dish. The ginger was noticeable only by it's (to my palate) absence. I wasn't expecting much from the cauliflower soup, though cauliflower is my favourite vegetable by some considerable margin, I find summer truffles too often disappointing. Not in this case though, the dish was presented as a bowl of cauliflower soup, with a slick of what looked like blitzed truffles with oil in the centre, then a few grated pieces of truffle on top of that, the grated pieces were neither here nor there, but the other truffle element was stonking, perfectly matched to the cauliflower and perhaps our favourite dish so far. The lamb was pretty much as you would expect, loin, served pink, and was a pretty good piece of meat, the best things on the plate though were the girolles and some sweet breads which I wasn't expecting but was very pleased to see. I can't remember exactly what cheese we were given but I do remember it was in perfect condition and well chosen. My memory also fails when it comes to the wine too but it would have been something red, Italian and about 35 quid. We really enjoyed everything about out short stay at Northcote, from the chat with the gardener on arrival, to the pretty swanky room, through to a much better than anticipated dinner. Also worthy of note was breakfast, possibly the best hotel breakfast I've had, and I've had a few. The sausages really stood out as being top notch, when I mentioned this to the waitress, she said 'yes, we've been looking a sausage as good as that for a long time' I for one am glad they made the effort. The Punchbowl report to follow when I can be arsed.

I always forget about Sous le Nez, it's been a while since we've been, I remember the meat and the cheese were particularly good, but some of the starters were a bit dodgy, heavy on the microwave.

Red Chilli

Indeed it has, we were there the day they learned of their award, I'm never keen on watching the staff get pissed but I suppose that day they deserved it. We're just back from a particularly spectacular week of Lakeland eating, we had three amazing meals (Northcote, Hipping Hall and the second night at Gilpin), one pretty good meal (though not pub of the year standard) at The Punchbowl and one pretty poor meal (first night at Gilpin) Reports will surely follow, when I've cooked and digested the lamb Karhi which is currently simmering on the hob.

← Added after my question smart arse

Any city or town in particular?

I'm not sure why knowing the background of the contestants matters so much, they can either cook or they can't........ One guy the other night said something like 'i want my own restaurant, Michelin stars, fame and glory' Well, learning to cook would be a good start.

As far as Mockney market traders go, Greg has to be right up there in the top 50. Roux makes the show more watchable than it has ever been, and it is amusing (as someone else alluded) to watch him sum up a dish and then listen to Greg verbally stumble around like a mechanical rodeo bull. As far as the Hairy Bakers (or Bikers) go, infantile isn't the first word that springs to mind when I watch them, now I've got over the fact that only one of them can cook, while the other hangs on his mates (boyfriends?) coat tails, they're both able presenters who whilst, admittedly commiting the ultimate crime of actually appearing to enjoy being on television, cook food which people at home who don't even know egullet exists will happily try to recreate. I like the show and enjoy watching it far more than most other 'personality chef' led shows.

Funnily enough we are! Oooh are you staying in one of the garden suites? Stayed in one a couple of years ago and had a memorable night in one of the hot tubs in a howling gale! ←

We've got two nights at Gilpin coming up and I'm looking forward to it

Browned cauliflower is one of my favourite things at the moment, roasted being a particular favourite, I may have to get myself to the fishmongers tomorrow and get some scallops.

Call me an idiot, but I think its a highly appropriate pairing and I've had a few delicious versions of it over the years. What don't you like about it? ← Much as I'd like to call you an idiot, if you are, I am too, I thing it's a combination that works very well, much preferable to the scallops/black pudding combo that seems the last gasp of so many lazy chefs.

The Isle of Wight has some good produce, local tomatoes and garlic are well known, and there are some good meat producers too.

Jo's got detox fever, so muggins here has to buy a juicer, anyone got any advice on either what to look for, or any specific models? Ta, Jon.

You need two things, a very very sharp knife and practice, actually, make that three things, as you'll need a way of maintaining your knife too, something like the Spyderco Sharpmaker is perfect, much better than a steel, which don't really sharpen a blade very well at all.

Our meal turned out to be pretty similar to the one Jeff had. I had calves brains and pigs head cromesqui to start (two separate dishes), Jo had courgette fritters with ricotta stuffed flowers, the fritters looked underwhelming when they arrived, like heavy stodgy balls of batter, but the batter actually was really good, light and crispy with not a trace of grease. The stuffed flowers were a real treat, even for this carnivore. The brains and head were really good too, the head maybe slightly underseasoned for me, but still a really good start to the meal. Our main courses were pork loin (me) with cheek and black pudding, and rib eye (Jo) The cheek was the best I've ever had and the black pudding was up there too, light while still being piggy. The loin wasn't the star of my main course, but that's only because the other elements were so good. Jo's ribeye was about as good as rib eyes get, great flavour, good texture, cooked exactly as ordered, with a wonderful red wine sauce and dauphine potatoes. It's speak volumes of the attention to detail at the Walnut Tree that a side order of green beans (runners it turned out) were, for me, one of the highlights, I'm off to the farm shop today to try and recreate them. Cheese was good too, five well chosen and beautifully kept pieces. With aperitifs, bottle and a half of wine, grappa and coffee the bill came to £131, very good value for one of my most memorable meals in a long time, and a welcome respite from multi course tasting menus. We had a quick chat with Shaun at the end and he was smiling from ear to ear, good to see a chef happy in his work.

I've eaten at the Albion a few times over the last few months and more often than not really enjoyed it. It's not cheap, but as Phil says, fair value.

Fraiche looks more and more appealing with every post on here. We just cancelled a meal at Purnells that was booked a couple of months ago, as when I checked the website the other day, the menu had changed significantly and not for the better, and prices seemed to have shot up. Because of that, we'll be eating at the Walnut Tree on Friday night, and I can't wait.

We're off here next week, I agree that on the menu at least the starters look far more interesting than the main courses, but I'm still looking forward to it more than I've looked forward to a meal in a long time.